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 Review #4841315 |
 | Thirty-three Years  [13+] A quest that went far beyond the library.  |
| (5.0)| Greetings, Sonali! This is so beautiful! Knowing a little bit of your life story, I sense that this is a deeply autobiographical narrative. You have such a bright, positive spirit. You can turn any prompt into a warm, heartfelt happy story, even when it's dealing with a sin. Envy is like a brokenness, a pain inside, a dissatisfaction with one's own life and anger that someone else has the seemingly perfect life we think we should have had. I love how you skillfully avoided using Sonia's name until the little boy breaks through her distress with his simple recognition of her value. In that moment, Sonia realizes that her life path is her own and she has done her best, been a good, loyal friend who can be there when other women can't, and is loved and appreciated by her circle of friends. She realizes her positive influence on others and the hard work she's done for the past thirty-three years has not been wasted. I love the little human, relatable, homey details: the peanut butter sandwiches, her thinking she might have to wash his shirt after he's done eating, the fact that she hasn't stored her second number in her contacts (I try not to do that because my phone numbers are all attached to various memberships and loyalty clubs...) It's such a perfectly realistic story, feeling like it's happened hundreds of times to people all over the world. As for improvements... I'm a little confused about the line in italics: "'Tell them I came and no one answered, that I kept my word,' he said." When Sonia tried to "investigate," is that the excuse his friends were told to say to her? A touch more context there would clarify why this is important. Ok, you might also want to finish italicizing the TV show names, that's considered conventional use. Aside from those little things, I think a more interesting subtitle might be a good idea. Maybe something more descriptive, like "a solitary librarian wonders if she missed out on the most important thing in life..." Or something like that. A hook, you know. Beyond that, this feels like a perfect little human interest story: engaging, sympathetic, and ultimately positive, showing us that life can be lived in different ways and one may not even realize how much their kindness and steadfastness is impacting others. A gentle reminder that others have their own struggles and there is never a reason to be envious when every life has value and meaning. Take care, thanks for sharing, and keep writing     My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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