\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED ITEMS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4846773
Review #4846773
Viewing a review of:
 Inner Turmoil Open in new Window. [E]
I wonder about all the things l am not aware of
by sindbad Author Icon
Credit this reviewer
#4846773
Review of Inner Turmoil  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Greetings, Sindbad *Smile*

I'm here for the Angel Lounge poetry challenge.

This poem is packed with Asian style wisdom, reminiscent of the Upanishads or other ancient scriptural musings. Haven't we all found ourselves lying awake at night, "thinking too much" about that which we do not know? I feel your confusion and concern about the afterlife, and I can relate. I love the metaphor of opening the clamshell to reveal the pearl, and that observation at the end about how our being and identity is wrapped up in what we were rather than what we can become is deep enough for days of consideration. And yet we fear the Unknown: are we to be punished for all we failed to do? Is there a second chance? Does salvation lie in some elaborate ritual done at the last minute by panicking devotees? Or are we to surrender ourselves, mistakes and all, to a god we are not sure of, trusting that if he is all powerful than he must also be all good, just and merciful?

So much philosophy is folded into this. I see you are an observant thinker and a dreamer. The lines flow well in free verse, with a measured length that lemds symmetry to the layout and creates a smooth reading experience... Although I always say, everything looks better when {size:4}{font:Verdana} is applied to the front of the text. Also, I see you have three "nothing burger" genres chosen for it, which greatly hinders visibility when people are browsing. I would recommend choosing Philosophy, Drama, Death, Emotional, Spiritual, Folklore, Mythology, or Melodrama as being more suitable to the subject at hand.

Aside from that, I greatly enjoyed reading this. It's good to know someone else "thinks too much..."

Take care, thanks for sharing, and keep writing *WingL**Heartv**WingR*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
   *CheckG* You last responded to this review 12/08/2025 @ 1:58pm EST
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4846773