The Void

About my own self-doubt when I worked for the Catholic Church...

I do not understand myself, let alone the world
There is too much mystery to contemplate
Having courage to walk, arms open-soul unfurled
Is out of my reach-the risk is too great

Right now, I deal in questions
Things I never ask out loud
Flinching at the suggestion
That I'm too frightened, too stubborn, too proud

Others ask my help in understanding God
They hold my hand tight as they seek out His face
I offer solace, feeling like a fraud
Lost, mistaken, out of place

My inner doubt is so intense
that I cannot bear to think
My shortcomings are so immense
that I would rather drown than drink

There is so much more here
Power that I don't possess
God grasps my hand, He's always near
To take away the nothingness.