Beach Gazing

Sometimes things need to change.

"Eye spy with my little eye...something tiny," Doug said. I sighed, he did this every trip to the beach.

"Is it itsy bitsy?" I asked.

"Yep,"

I put a hand to my head and closed my eyes pretending to think. "teeny weeny?"

Doug nodded vigorously.

I clapped with my palms bent, making a hollow popping sound. I really didn't understand why my friend's babe radar always went off on the beach. He never had the guts to talk to women. "I know what it is!" I shouted. "An itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polkadot bikini."

"Wow, how'd you know?" Doug asked. "I only spotted those jiggle puppies like ten seconds ago. Oooh! Those legs make me wanna spank myself! She's so hot!"

I popped open the beach umbrella and inserted it into the anchor I'd already drilled in. "Yet you never talk to the face above the 'jiggle puppies'," I noted. "C'mon, go see if she'll give you the time of day."

He twisted around and gaped at me. I couldn't see his eyes behind his sun glasses but I was certain they were bugging out. "Bro," Doug whispered. "You serious?"

"Yeah man," I said. "I'll go with you, It's now or never!"

"You're the best bro, Alex," he told me. I mentally broke out the popcorn. Was I a bad friend for wanting to watch the drama? Probably, but I didn't care.

We swaggered over to where the bronze goddess lay on her beach towel. She looked deeply engrossed in the graphic novel she'd brought with her.

"Ni-hao-ma!"

I slapped my palm to my face. I'd forgotten that Doug always assumed any pretty girl with vaguely Asian features was Chinese. I'd also discounted that Doug thought he spoke that language.

The girl glared up at my friend. "Excuse me," She said. "Did you just speak Chinese to me?"

"Well thats what you speak isn't it?" Doug assumed.

The graphic novel went down into the sand with a splash. Beach goddess was in Doug's face before he could say anything. "Listen asshole," she yelled. "My dad's a Marine at Camp Foster, my mother was born and raised in Okinawa! Don't just assume I'm something based on my looks!"

"I was just trying to—"

"And don't pretend I didn't see you ogling my boobs!" She yelled. "You're just like every other boy; shallow and stupid! I just came here to get some sun and read my Manga! I have a girlfriend!"

Right on cue, a tall woman in a black bathing suit came up and snaked her hand around her angry partner's waste. "Babe, are these men bothering you?"

Abruptly, polka dot bikini's demeanor changed. "Oh hey Rache," she smiled. "I'm sure they were just about to leave."

"Alright, Yuko," Rache said. "Well I was just about done beach combing. No harm done, right?" Her eyes were like outer space; cold and hostile.

"I'm sorry," Doug mumbled. He was now looking at his toes. At least he would've been if they hadn't been buried deep into the loose grains.

I grabbed him by the shoulders and steered him away. I was choking on my own suppressed laughter. Still, I couldn't let my bro get dressed down anymore. How were we to know we'd ran into a couple?

After that fiasco, Doug didn't want to stay. So much for a day beach gazing.

Word count: 561
Prompt: use the following song titles in your story.
Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikini

I'm Sorry

It's Now or Never