It was in the stars

things find their way

Now that licensing had been accomplished, the real work started. Mrs. Phagun and I fell into a routine, which included attempts to modernize the programming going on at the house. The programming consisted mostly of household chores, and no records of any kind had been kept for years before my organization got involved. There had been many interesting and tense talks about the need for records. Mrs. Phagun thought the idea silly and a waste of time.

"After all, she said, “the Girls know their jobs and have been doing them for years. Why write it down?"

I said, "There is an old saying in human services - if it isn't on paper, it doesn't exist.
"All you have to do is look to see that it exists, Mrs. Phagun replied.

There it was, that smug or "something" look; this was not going to be easy.

I looked her in the eye and asked, "Why are you giving me a hard time?”

"Because this ‘stuff and business’ is silly and a waste of time," she paused and then said, “and it’s fun to give you a little trouble. It keeps you on your toes.

I remarked that now I knew why my toes ached so much after I had spent time with her.

Every small change - small to me - required hours of discussion, negotiation, and compromise.

I was having the time of my life, and I believe Mrs. Phagun was, as well. Looking back now, I realize that this was a time in my life when I was learning many great lessons and that Mrs. P was one heck of a teacher. She never gave up until I learned, even when I was supporting her. That could be very confusing. I often did not know which side of an argument I was on. But "things" got done, which truly needed to be done, and my friendship with Mrs. Phagun grew.

One day, I received a call at my office informing me that Mrs. Phagun had been taken to the hospital with severe abdominal pain. I was stunned. It had never occurred to me that Mrs. Phagun was vulnerable to anything, certainly not to physical problems. It turned out that it was a gall bladder attack, and Mrs.Phagun was going to have to have surgery.

I was very nervous, after all, she was in her mid-eighties, and this would be serious surgery.

I went to the hospital immediately, even though it was not visiting hours, and bluffed my way in to see her. Carrying a briefcase and looking like I belonged there usually worked for me. As I approached her room, her family was leaving, all with long faces.

Once in the room, I saw this very frail-looking woman lying in a hospital bed. I took a moment before I realized it was Mrs. Phagun.

As I approached her bed, she noticed me and slowly turned to look at me. She said, "You aren't supposed to be here. Visiting hours are over."

I said, "Would that have stopped you?"

Looking me in the eye, she said,” Not for a minute."

I said, "You don't look very good" - it was our practice to speak plainly with each other.

She replied, "I feel worse than that."

Even with this attempt at banter, I could see she felt defeated and ready to ‘give up’. Mrs. Phagun went on to say just that and as well, and that she saw no point in going on.

I didn't like the sound of that; it was not the Mrs. Phagun I had come to know. I pulled up a chair and sat down.

I said, "So you're thinking about leaving?"

"Well, we all have to go sometime, and I'm very tired. Why not go now?" Mrs. Phagun asked in a quiet, shaky voice.

Before I knew what I was saying, I said, "Why not now? - because we have just got to know each other and I can't afford to lose a friend and teacher like you. I know that it is selfish, but I can't help it."

Mrs. Phagun looked at me for what seemed a long time, making no reply. Finally, she said, "Well, maybe I can stick around for a while longer. I'll give it a try. But, you know, it is not all my decision."

Trying to cover my embarrassment, I said, "I doubt even the 'Big Guy' would want to argue with you once you made up your mind."

She chuckled, rolled her eyes at me, and said, "Does this mean I'll get my way more often?"

I laughed and said, "Remind me, when was the last time you did not get your own way?"

She laughed and, with a furrowed bro,w said, "You know, I can't recall either."

During this exchange, I noticed the sparkle returning to her eyes and greater strength in her voice. I had never seen anything like it before. I believe I was a witness to her willing herself back to life from an accepted death.

She had the surgery and recovered fully in record time. In a very short time, she was home, and it was "tea time," but without our long-standing pretense of formality and distance, we fought, laughed, and still got things done. It was terrific to just accept our friendship and get on with things.

Quite some time ago, Mrs. Phagun and I had discovered that we shared the same birth date and were both Scorpios. I often wondered if that was one of the things that caused us to work well together and to have such a strong bond. After that day in the hospital, Mrs. Phagun always referred to me as being her "Twin Grandson.

We never did talk about our "friendship" again; we just lived it. It was, after all, in the stars.