Moon Over the Ocean

This is a sonnet I wrote for my lover. Constructive criticism appreciated.

The ocean of my spirit rises - falls,
Its surface given form by motion deep.
Drowned in its troubled currents my heart calls;
Adrift, my mind is lulled to restless sleep.
In my night sky, a goddess weeps alone.
Her tears of silver light dance on a wave
That hides my heart from view, sunk like a stone
Locked deep beneath the surface in a cave.
Her pain she shapes into a song of love,
Which calms my spirit, makes its waters clear,
Allows her light to stream down from above,
Shine on my heart, and gently draw it near.
Thus pain to pain may speak, perchance be heard,
And make love something more than just a word.



This is a traditional Shakespearean sonnet, meaning it has fourteen lines of ten syllables each, written in iambic pentameter, that follow the rhyme scheme abab, cdcd, efef, gg. There are no breaks in its structure because that is how Shakespeare wrote them.