Creative fun in
the palm of your hand.
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/blog/enga
Rated: 18+ · Book · Biographical · #1311011
A terminal for all blogs coming in or going out. A view into my life.
Started July 1st 2019 for contests, etc. as other blogs are filling up and have other purposes.

Ferry boat between Solvorn and Ornes across the Lustrafjord i Sogn og Fjordane.

I'm starting a new blog because
L'aura del Campo  (18+)
Online journal capturing the moment and the memory of moments. A meadow meditation.
#982524 by Kåre Enga, P.O. 22, Blogville
had over 1,200 entries and that was getting close to full. I don't want to trim it by deletion. I did that once, much to my dismay. Will be used more for poetry.

Hoarfrosts from Hell  (GC)
Anything I'm not happy about or that I don't want in my main blog!
#997339 by Kåre Enga, P.O. 22, Blogville
is still hidden from the public and will remain so. I don't post there often. It's more personal and full of angst. Was used for 30DBC for May 2020.

Enga mellom fjella  (18+)
Enga mellom fjella: where from across the meadow, poems sing from mountains and molehills.
#1317094 by Kåre Enga, P.O. 22, Blogville
was full... until the number of entries was increased. A mixed blog.

I'll be linking to
On The Write Path  (18+)
ON THE WRITE PATH: travel journal for Around-the-World in 2015, 16, 18.
#2032403 by Kåre Enga, P.O. 22, Blogville
as I need to post there about my travels.

O Pinions!  (XGC)
May my opinions gather wind under their wings and fly, perchance to soar.
#1501776 by Kåre Enga, P.O. 22, Blogville
is for my opinions. *Laugh*

Nurture your Nature  (18+)
Look around. Let Nature nurture your Soul. I record images I sense and share them here.
#1439094 by Kåre Enga, P.O. 22, Blogville
was set up for nature observations and musings.

Watt's Gnus  (18+)
On topics and today's gnus. Definitely opinionated. Set to 18+ for a reason.
#1439092 by Kåre Enga, P.O. 22, Blogville
come out of a need to share interesting stuff I come across. When I was young I did a small newsletter named as such. (or was it column in the newsletter? Been 30 years... I think.)

Flash Fiction  (GC)
Short 300 word, more or less, "stories" .
#2190336 by Kåre Enga, P.O. 22, Blogville
is where I put my flash fictions. Maybe someday I'll figure it out and have enough good ones to publish. Ratings vary and some are hidden from view.

I've started an appendix (I no longer have one personally) to keep track of my Space Cadet journals for Space Blog. It's a work constantly under construction. Mind the mess.
Space Cadet - the never ending journal  (18+)
Journeys of an Alien Space crew.
#2226611 by Kåre Enga, P.O. 22, Blogville

I needed to start a folder for contests as there are so many deadlines and details to remember.
Conquest ... to keep track of contests  (18+)
A place to keep track of in progress works and up-coming deadlines as well as any awards.
#2233119 by Kåre Enga, P.O. 22, Blogville
(also very messy!) *Shock2*

Previous ... -1- 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 ... Next
February 25, 2021 at 1:01pm
February 25, 2021 at 1:01pm
24 degrees and cloudy. It's after 10 a.m. and I haven't finished my coffee.

Interesting how the news has shifted. There's still plenty going on but without one individual on center stage, the news is almost normal.

Plus... although covid-19 is still a serious threat, and the vaccination rollout has been a disaster, the numbers are pointing towards relief.

Travel however... there have always been ways to get around restrictions but budget travelers like me can't afford a two week quarantine and any resulting fines. Wealthy? Fewer problems. But even for the wealthy, so many flight connections just aren't available.

2 p.m. and 33 degrees. I've had a couple coffees and a fish sandwich.

I have to be careful while eating. My teeth are bad now, much worse than one year ago. Also, an ache in the jaw. I need new teeth.

Today is the designated day that some writings must be finished.

Don't get me started! I should be writing instead of answering the QOTD.

What is the best way to train people to see the gradients in the world around them
instead of just a simplistic “this is good, that is wrong” view of the world?

I'm NOT an Absolutist.

As a traveler and a photographer I can assert that there are many shades of grey.

So why is this an issue? On/off, black/white, good/evil is simpler for many people. It's how they were raised. Certain religious and cultural groups are notorious in this regard, especially if they were taught that anything less than 100% perfection was unacceptable to their parents, family, community, even to God.

I agree that this was a factor on January 6th, Paul .

But how to overcome it? Same as how to instill it. Teach those around you as best you can, as Bob's Alternate Realities notes. And start making a lasting change by teaching the children as Jayne eloquently stated.

Yes, I believe in core spritual beliefs; however, as opinionated as I am, I'm not willing to play God.

What I didn't rant about was common black/white thinking found among specific religious cultural groups. I was raised among them. The only thing that kept them humble was their working-class status. They had no power other than to mock lesser human beings and to keep them out of the neighborhood. Recently, a certain someone understood that and manipulated their prejudices and fears stoking them to an angry resolve to act. So some did.

But even in war... little is black/white. There is always kindness, tolerance, empathy and a slew of other virtues at the very worse of times.

Just before the deadline.

I wish to live before I die  (E)
You rummaged among the dead, discovered death. I breathe and yet you do not feel my breath
#2245229 by Kåre Enga, P.O. 22, Blogville

I seek your forgiveness, your wrinkled skin,
glaucous grey eyes that can barely see me,
ears that ignore white lies, my rancid sighs.

February 24, 2021 at 2:28am
February 24, 2021 at 2:28am
Robert roused me with a list of 'best sandwiches'. I wrote:

"I didn't care for the list. I get it that the author likes Jewish delis, reubens, Italian everything and German beef... but I still don't like these lists.

1. I'm from WNY not NYC so our foods always lose out to the City. We're tired of that shit. Visit the Polish markets, eat pierogies, go German and eat Beef-on-Weck, or cheesecake. Italian ... who do you think reinvented wings and made it a thing? Better, try pasta fagioli. Yes, one can find a knish but NYC must have better. We had more people in our county than all of Montana until up to a few years ago. Nuff, said.

2. Montana ... Pork John from Butte? Other than pasties from Anaconda or rocky-mountain-oysters at the Testicle Festival ... safe choice. We eat it here in Missoula but I'd just as soon have Kansas chicken livers.

3. Nebraska. One word: runza. Very Czech but eaten throughout the state. I've never heard of a deep-fried cheese sammich.

4. Iowa. Loose meat sandwich. Go to Maid-Rite in Marshalltown.

5. PA. A Philly steak and cheese is fine, as long as it comes with a slice of pie. Nowhere does pie better.

Skip most of the States and go to one of the best multi-cultural cities of North America. Either Mexico City or Toronto will do. Yes, one can get a cheap taco pastor on the streets of CDMX but Mexicans eat everything and the various indigenous cultures know how to prepare them. T.O.? What cuisine of the world do you prefer? At least try a Salvadorean pupusa (chicharron stuffed tortilla) or go to Spadina Street for authentic Chinese. Hell, just skip NA and go to China. Even Taiwan has food from all of East and Southeast Asia and mainland China. "

And a burger? Try pljeskavica in Serbia.

It's after midnight here. 27 degrees and dropping. Snowing quite nicely.

I should just go to sleep.

35 degrees at 2:45 p.m. and *Sun*.

Bought cottage cheese because it was on sale. Plane tickets are on sale too... but I just can't risk it yet. *Plane*

I checked bank balance. I have too much money saved up. The problem? After I was homeless and penniless (years ago) I became afraid of money. It had never been my friend to begin with. Now I really need to spend on 'toys' eg. a new computer. And when I travel I can afford either refundable tickets or more comfortable seating or an occasional private room. The problem? I need to convince myself that it's okay. I'm similar to someone who goes from work to cash their check at the bar. We both have an unhealthy relationship with money. *Sad*

So... once again... how much would it cost to take 6 2-month-long trips? How much 12 1-month long trips? (hint: more expensive.) I need to crunch numbers and then tell myself that it's okay to spend the extra money I have because I've spent 1 year sitting in two rooms.

And I need to post raw numbers here or in my t-log so I can't avoid them.

6 p.m., the vesper hour, no bells ringing, just a drip of water. The days grow long and the alpenglow sits on slopes of tinted snow, a shade of tawny ... like a color-point Siamese ... but silent.

I'm trying to write a 1 star poem, but I'm failing. I'm frustrated and my Muse is laughing. Maybe I should read? Teach him patience?

I finished a short story "Traveling Teddy [355], wrote a short poem "To dream [354].
February 23, 2021 at 12:45pm
February 23, 2021 at 12:45pm

A friend has been diagnosed with pancreatice cancer. Prognosis imho? Toast.

My toaster had barely been warming the English muffins. I reset it. This morning I'm eating burnt toast slathered with butter to soften it.

I did not burn my coffee.

33° at 10 a.m. and weak sun. I'm going to try to get out. If only to pick up milk.

I'm reading a 1975 paperback, The Kung Fu Avengers. Light reading is still reading imho. I'm withholding certain misgivings for the moment.

574 trinkets collected to date. Not too bad. I did offer some in February but I'll need to make new ones.

36 degrees at 1:23 p.m. and sunny. Saw two friends. Picked up milk. It's $7/2 2% gallons here. Le Petit is open inside... but not for sitting down. Very frustrating.

Sun and clouds up to their usual games playing tag at 4:25 p.m.; still 36 degrees.

Worked on a short story for children. At 560 words it's about right, but I need to expand and edit. Limit is 1,000. I really want to know what reading level it is. A couple words may need to be replaced by something simpler.

So... three pieces almost ready for posting. Almost... Need to be careful about time and deadlines.

Chicken-mushroom-parmesan on a bun. A bit 'goopy' so I may need to serve what remains over rice.

Soup can be eaten after the expiration date. I have 7 'old' cans that expired in 2020. I'll be having cream of asparagus next. *Laugh* Some of the new soups expire in 2023. I have 31 cans of soup. That will hold me for awhile.

Quill nominations (I glanced at them today):
"Pink [262] (medium length poem - free verse) fine
"April 23: a poem that contains an argument [48] (medium length poem - structured) needs an edit or something
"Być Gwiazdą (To be a star) (297w) [35] (flash fiction) needs an edit
"Five Simple Steps [177.11] (298 words) (flash fiction) may be okay
"Porthole (blog) no comment
February 22, 2021 at 6:06am
February 22, 2021 at 6:06am
41 degrees at 4:01 a.m. I finished another book.

Liminal space that place that doesn't exist if you look at it, that transition, that threshold between realities. Child of a Rainless Year by Jane Lindskold explores that no-place that seems unreal but exists. I enjoyed the read and wanted to finish it before falling asleep.

Supposed to rain. 40 degrees and dark skies at 8:50 a.m.

People wonder why I don't submit my work ... it's expensive after awhile. Plus, it's emotionally difficult for me. Not the rejection ... other issues.

But undocumented poets have it worse. Why didn't I know? This article explains:


Fell back into a restless nap. It's 1 p.m. and 44 degrees. I'm listless.

This weeks Ghouls:

*Box* 1. Finish as many challenges as possible and submit to contests. List them here:
*Boxcheck* 2. Buy milk, soup, potatoes. Seem silly? Don't even want to leave my room.
*Box* 3. Read. I'm catching up, so now's a good time to keep it going. Clashes with #1 & #2 though.
*Box* 4. Catch up on washing clothes.
*Boxcheck* 5. Open the windows! Air the place out. Burn incense. Something.

It's a mix to keep me from drowning in black motes on bound white paper.

I have no interest no energy. Is this lethargy? I'm listless.

I should be checking into travel plans but until I get the vax I'm stuck here and even then... may have to call KLM to check on 'cancel' and 'covid-cancel' policies. I saw very cheap flights to Lisbon and Oslo. But... what guarantees?

I'm temporarily deeply-depressed in a year of general-depression.

Probably not-wise to listen to Reba. Memories of 1989 and Robert who adored Reba. I never knew exactly what happened (memory hole 87-89). Apparently he was bashed with a brick outside a bar and died two weeks later.

I blame Bri. She offered a ride to the grocery store. 5 lbs potatoes, 12 cans of soup, buns, pork, mayo...

It's raining! And yes, one window is open and a pot of water with spices is steaming on the stove. 39 degrees and steady at 6 p.m., so I may have to close the window before I go to bed.

February 21, 2021 at 12:15pm
February 21, 2021 at 12:15pm
9:30 a.m. and 33 degrees and dreary. Me too.

Shaved my beard off... most of it. My skin has 'issues' at times and needs a periodic airing out. Should be above freezing for a couple days.

No blister yet where I burned myself. That's good news.

Wrote a sonnet ... which is fine, but it doesn't seem appropiate for the contest I wrote it for. Contests aren't always clear about rating nor acceptable content. In this case my poem feels edgy in a way unsuitable for Hallmark-Christians or the LDS Relief Society. It's not E.

But it doesn't sound nice to put it that way ... My daily life is usually E, but characters and poems aren't necessarily. Guess I'm still rebelling against some puritanical heritage from my maternal grandfather's family.

39 degrees at 2 p.m.

Made a sammich out of grilled chicken thigh and hummus mixed with smoked ham.

Sitting inside. Have seen some local birds. Nothing interesting, it's just that they are out after the Deep Freeze.

Round 114 of "Crack Kraken's Code Contest starts. If I can crack the third word I may be able to solve this quicker than last time. There are no repeat words, and only one two-letter and three-letter word each. So... if I make a good guess I might get lucky. Otherwise...

Back to reading and dithering.

Mostly dithering. 40 degrees at 4:54.

Blimprider is offering a course. The intro: "The Elements of Steampunk, Introduction

Which got me thinking. I posted:

Well... it's obvious that I need to read your book. Then imagine an alt-history with air-pirates. Is alcohol allowed as a fuel (like in sake)? I imagine a Taiwan freeing itself from Japan (WW2 didn't happen quite as we are told) ... kinda silkpunk meets steampunk without the dark dirty skies of coal (except from China). Since Taiwan has little oil, coal or gas the conversion to wind, solar, thermal, bio-waste would take place sooner or later (IRL... later *Sad*). It has plenty of water (fresh water can be seasonal) as it's an island. Of course I could just place it in Pittsburgh complete with black skies and the steam engine whistle (like in my childhood).

The real issue is April. If I start to travel I won't have as much spare time.

His book (placed in alt-historic Afrika):
Beyond the Rails  (18+)
My signature series, a trilogy of steampunk adventures in the skies over colonial Kenya
#2189142 by Blimprider

Anna Marie Carlson asks "Why are so many people talking about the world coming to an end?"

I would make a quick two part answer. 1. They don't want to change or feel incapable of becoming the change they need to be. Ghandi's “You must be the change you wish to see in the world.” demands work and, wanting to live nostalgically in the Past, feel they don't have to try. 2. Although found globally it's a very Western doctrine of believing in and praying for the End, absolving them of any responsibilty to improve Life in the here-and-now... because they are better than all the un-holy people who will perish.

To me? It's a cop-out (they are either super-religious apocalyptic or believe in nothing i.e. nihilistic), but don't bother pointing that out. Since They (the religious ones) are the Only Ones who Know the Truth... why argue?

February 20, 2021 at 3:04am
February 20, 2021 at 3:04am
1 a.m. and only 27 degrees. Toasty.

Finished book #6, Mrs. Pollifax and the Lion Killer. I enjoyed it. Wasn't sure at the beginning. Light read. So now I can tackle something heavier? Hope so. My goal this weekend is to work on contest pieces and submit some.

Definitely time for bed.

33 degrees at 11:47! Sunshine peeking out.

Woke up to this:

Merit Badge in Second Time Around II
[Click For More Info]

Hi  [Link To User enga] ,

Congratulations! You won the Grand Prize in  [Link To Item #2164876]  with your brilliant poem,  [Link To Item #2236559] .



My name's not Jack!  (13+)
Pumpkin wants you to remember that pumpkin pie is best from pie pumpkins shared with love.
#2236559 by Kåre Enga, P.O. 22, Blogville

It's a tad purply. *HeartV*

Homemade lunch ... sunny ... at 2 p.m.

I buttered two slices of cheap white bread. Sprinkled garlic-parsley on one, garlic-parsley-Italian-spices on the other. Cut into strips and toasted both sides.

I'm dipping in homemade hummus I whipped up last night. Life is delicious, except...

I burnt finger. I have an aloe plant but I'm expecting to see a blister. I need to be more careful.

I've stated reading Child of a Rainless Year. This is book #7 of 52. So far, I really like it. *Smile*

Some snow, some sun at 4 p.m.

Revised an old poem. I think I actually improved it!

In search of Iris  (ASR)
"Yet golden-eyed in a dark blue dress, she squats in soft grass bereft." 12 lines rhyme.
#1233286 by Kåre Enga, P.O. 22, Blogville

It's also in keeping with the color-of-the-day.

Ate a pile of potato pancake with butter and brown sugar.
February 19, 2021 at 1:05am
February 19, 2021 at 1:05am
11 p.m. 27 degrees. Quiet.

I finished Tracy White's How I Made It To Eighteen. Young and bulemic... breakdown... interesting read. She calls herself Stacy Black in this memoir... that too I find interesting.

I will choose something totally different next. I've finished 5 books. Two of them short, but pages don't count. Like poetry. I need to read poetry slower. Each poem deserves to have its moment. Some deserve more moments than others.

I need to be careful what I post here. This is not my rant blog nor is it my private journal. Just because no one comments doesn't men it's not being read... although... 33 views in a week = not being read.

It's sad saggy blog.

I hope to get one more piece of writing done and submitted today. That will help. I have 9 days left and lots of writing in front of me. Getting something done actually helps while I work on other things.

I commented to Robert re life on Mars: "I like the idea of robots. But quantity matters. I'd like to see 100 mini-robots that can travel (roll) in any direction, get out of holes, over or around obstacles, that can be recharged by a weak sun. Even if half weren't functioning after a year, and half again in two years, there would still (hypothetically) be 3 scurrying after 5. Unless they are all going around in circles... or pausing to 'pee'... they could cover quite a bit of territory... if they were slow moving, say 1 km/day they could go over 300 km/yr or 1500 km after 5 years. And small is key. Like ants, they could teach us a lot. Many humans tend to think in macro terms when micro is where it's at. Bigfoot doesn't have a summerhome on Mars or Titan, but microbes might.

Even on Earth, so much life is small and so much life seeks shelter in the cracks."

Noon ... ish ... 33 degrees. I'm melting. *Laugh*

I'm reading Mrs. Pollifax... light reading, short and sweet.

I finished my second coffee so at least I'm awake ... ish. Not as bright today as yesterday.

My last two posts on the Newsfeed have been ignored. *sigh* This blog is ignored *sigh*sigh*. My life is *s*s*s*s*s*s*s*s*s*s*s*s*s* You get the picture.

Evening... in the garden of...

My geraniums are blooming and the plant I barely rescued last October has a flowerhead developing. It should be red.

No mail. I crossed the river to check. It was 38 degrees. Balmy.

Wrote: "I lean [351]

I made my own hummus: crushed white sesame seeds, added lemon, lemon pepper, garlic with parsley, cooked chick peas and blended, adding olive/canola oil.

February 18, 2021 at 12:49pm
February 18, 2021 at 12:49pm
25 degrees and sunny at 10:30 a.m. May get up to freezing today, definitely tomorrow.

Finished "SpyBoy" #7 graphic novel (YA, complete with chibis) which was a nice break from what I was reading. This was book #4.

The days are getting longer, sun stronger and this is the time of year when I want spring to be sprung! knowing full well that it might show up in April or May. Weather is going to be milder but still wintry with snow or worse (rain), so reading is a decent way to amuse myself. Hope my energy levels go up.

More perishables in the house after shopping last evening in a beautiful big-flake snow shower. I have bread! I skipped shopping for a week due to frigid weather. I hadn't stepped outside for about 10 days.

Went to the Senior Center noonish and sat outside in the sun in front of Big Dipper. Don, Ben, Kathi and me. Kathi gave me a club salad. I was thankful because I seldom eat greens.

Back in my rooms sitting in sunshine.

It feels good on my bare skin.

30 degrees at 3:44. Thinking of shaving my beard.

I didn't dare when it was below 0 ... should've because I didn't go anywhere! *Laugh*

Worked on a poem, will work on others. Starting another book, a diary of a breakdown done like a cartoon book with line drawings.

Watered some plants; onions rooting; spider plant blooming.

Took out the garbage...

I know these are mundane tasks but being room-bound is really depressing. I consider any small task completed a personal victory.

For "Blogging Circle of Friends : Use these words in your blog today: crouch, vote, commission, hesitate, fail and spoil.

The Commission on Progress was called to order. They were intent on finally removing all eyesores and promoting Mapleton as one of the most beautiful in the state. The smelly marsh spoiled that image. It would be improved by putting in a clean asphalt parking lot. The commission never failed to disappoint the progressives; the luddites had held sway for generations. But then... there was me, moved back from the modern city with a degree in urban planning. I had replaced Old Man Murray who was dead set against any improvements other than new streetsigns... and even then... So far, I was the villain to his minions. The town was dying; it needed to change. I wanted new lighting, a larger library, a new school auditorium. But this... I remember crouching in the cattails as a child, intent on seeing the bittern protecting her eggs. I remember her protests and the dive-bombing black-birds, the leeches mom had to remove, the vampire mosquitoes that made me itch all night. I loved and hated that marsh. They were going to fill it in with the rubble from torn down buildings. Build a parking lot, get rid of the stench and danger. They were going to put in a culvert, straighten the meandering stream, remove it from sight; birds could always nest elsewhere. Progress they assured everyone. The board was split down the middle; but, they were certain it would pass as they smiled at me. I thought of Old Man Murray, barely cold in his grave. When my name was called I didn't hesitate. I voted nay.

Night falls and I've finished a poem:

Crone and Sage [349]  (E)
Old age isn't always a barrier to love
#2244624 by Kåre Enga, P.O. 22, Blogville

February 17, 2021 at 6:11pm
February 17, 2021 at 6:11pm
Almost 4 p.m. and I've done very little. 31 degrees. Light snow aloft? Got up to freezing today.

Up too late. I took a nap. I'm on book #4, a YA graphic novel. I needed a break.

No writing yet and I should wait until I force myself to go outside to pick up groceries.

27 degrees at 7 p.m. Big flakes. *Snow4*

Went out for first time in ?? days ... I think it's been 10. Snizzle on the way to Orange Food Farm; huge flakes smacking me on the way back. Magical. *Smile*

Coffee is the culprit. I buy it when it's 30 cents off. The cheaper culprit? Ice cream. *Laugh*

I trudged up the stairs huffing and puffing but not as bad as some other times.

An answer to QOTD:

You roused the Rabble ... including me. *Bigsmile*

But I'll keep it short. Good/evil is a cultural construct. The dichotomy is not universally accepted.

Those who live within their culture: traditions, customs, rituals, beliefs will mirror that. Those who venture outside will learn about other point-of-views.

Books, movies... you name it... allow us to go where no one has gone before. It's why books are burned and movies banned. They threaten the 'truth' of a narrow belief system.

Because of my multi-cultural life experiences my beliefs are much broader.

Yet, a quote from ‘Abdu’l-Bahá makes sense to me.

Good exists; evil is nonexistent.

February 16, 2021 at 3:17pm
February 16, 2021 at 3:17pm
White Days ... all color removed, everything reduced to a hush.

Brighter, warmer today. +27 (-3c) degrees at 1 p.m.

Finished my book last night. An interesting revelation at the end that cleared up one character's motivation. Sarah Zettel writes in various genres including mystery, fantasy and sci-fi.

Got up late... not good for me because it means a shorter 'day' during these short days. I could venture out but might wait until tomorrow.

Maybe another coffee will help. Or eating something! *Rolleyes*

Kathi responded to the above comment left on facebook.

Kathi Campbell:

Off my balcony today
Mountains are invisible.


White Days ... all color removed, everything reduced to a hush.


Crows ... slash of black through white winter's sky.


Eagle cruising the river ... lunch under ice.


Heated dog dish.....Sparrow hot tub.

The Frozen Chosen via 92.9 (Lutherans should really understand):


Speaking of Lutherans...

The Washington Examiner has an article


where they quote on Psalm 146: "Do not put your trust in princes, in mortal men, who cannot save."

I don't agree with the Christian obsession with Salvation (who, why, how, etc.) but the article makes the valid point that nations come and go.

As for Lutherans... The State Church of Germany was taken over by the Nazis in the 30s. It didn't end well.

I finished book #1 of my 52/52. That makes 3 finished. I should start #4 tonight... if I'm smart.

I was stuck on Autumn Letters. It had triggered me and I was blocked. Reading 2 other books unblocked me. I'll need to do 'reviews' now. AL was set in Nebraska 1963-68. Assassin's Masque in England 1716. Storm Petral in Scotland 1980s. I'll have to go another direction in my next choice. Nothing heavy I hope. I thnk I'm supposed to be on book 7 ... so some catching up to do.


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