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Printed from http://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/amcdill
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8 Public Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review by Anxious Owl
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Omg!So many thoughts. I thought it was great. I immediately fell in love with your cast of characters. You get a really clear picture of their distinct personalities right away, and that makes you like them and want to keep reading. I definitely like the idea of jen's character as someone who's a little out of touch with the things most of the kids care about but is perhaps more in tune with the bigger picture(though it's clear she has some things to overcome)

In terms of specific feedback, I think you could take out the part where she apologizes for someone running into her because it breaks you out of the anxiety you built so well to that point, but that's just my personal opinion. Also a 19-10 soccer game is PRETTY high (one team scoring over 3 is rare from what I've seen), and a defender scoring at all, much less four goals, is really impressive and pretty unlikely. Though maybe that's what you were getting at? Just a thought.

My favorite line in the whole thing is that she "felt claustrophobic in her own skin." I'm in love with that line.

Anyways, long story short I read it, I loved it, I'm waiting for more.
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Review of The Naked Roach  
Review by Anxious Owl
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This was great!! The Kronar family dynamics were so interesting. Had a great time reading this. I'll get to your book chapters eventually, too!
3
3
Review of Nightchild  
Review by Anxious Owl
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I loved this! I would definitely continue reading if I'd picked this book up. I love the imagery because it gives you a good sense of the setting and a clear image of your specific breed of ogre. There are also a lot of intriguing snippets of information that leave the reader wanting more. Great chapter!
4
4
Review of The Pot 'o Gold  
Review by Anxious Owl
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Great story! Really entertaining to read.
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Printed from http://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/amcdill