"The pages are filled along the way
With words and the thoughts our soul has to say."
i love this part...alot. i think it really explains alot and its true too. i really like this poem. i agree with it. the second line though, is a bit confusing, but since when is poetry easy to interpret. i think you did a really good job on it.
yeah me too. but you cant not need people. i know you may feel that way, but you need someone, even if they hurt u. you'll never know love if you never know hurt
except for a couple spelling mistakes (its alibi, and dying) , i think this poem is amazing. its some thing i can relate to
I built up this wall
Built it up to watch it fall
You are my alliby
i love this part like crazy.
i like this alot. i think its a really really great description of who you are. its awesome. i have no helpful feedback about improvement cuz i think you got this down
i think this is good, but as i read through the poem, it kinda seems like you're trying to hard to rhyme. The first part:
Don't cry no more Baby,
Put your head on my shoulder,
The truth is in the eyes of the beholder.
is my favorite. this just blows me away. but ... actually i like it all, except the second part. i think the second part is a bit cliche, and its trying to rhyme but it just makes the poem seem to drag. overall though, its really good. i hope you take my feedback! Keep writing, you're really good
this kills me. your poems bring back so many memories of this past year. its a good thing though. most people cant move me like this, especially about heartbreak and love anymore.
your poems are so relate-able. i love them so much. sorry im not leaving good feedback, but your poems just really inspire me. they assure me that im not the only one that goes through this. you're an amazing writer.
i love this poem. this is actually something i do...except i keep a journal for the letters. its hard conquering that fear of handin them over to the one you love. but do it sooner rather than later, because you dont know how much time you have left with that person. even if they reject you, itll be ok. itll give you more time to move on, at least they know what you feel right? and if they feel for you, at least you have time together. dont wait even if its scary. i learned that the hard way. over all tho, this is an amazing poem
i know this feeling. and really well too.
u put it really well in words.
i dont really know what to say about it, since i know this feeling, and i know theres really nothing you can say to make it go away, unless its from the person causing you the pain. but over all its a really good poem and i love it. i know it may not be finished, but it really doesn't have to be. i mean it could, but, ah!! im not making much sense am i?? well it doesnt need to be finished to affect the reader because it already has. good job with this and keep writing. i hope the pain goes away soon.
this is really good. it really...just wow. yeah. so i thought it was really great, but it'd be nice to know, or at least get a couple more hints about what is going on with these two, and how they really ended up together in the first place. i think it'd be even better if you could answer a few of a reader's questions that the suspense creates, without taking away any suspense. does that make sense?? over all its really good though.
I really love this. It reflects what i feel and whats going on in my life. I really like the way you expressed it.The beginning part where fire is waiting for air but only gets a bit of it, not enough of it is really moving in somehow. Its really good, but i think you should add a bit more to the ending, you know?
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