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Printed from http://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/devinc12
Review Requests: OFF
17 Public Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review of Gumballs  
Review by Dallas
Rated: E | (3.0)
It is not a bad poem, but I would recommend trying to stick to a more rhyme based poem. I like the way you describe each of the majors and maybe go into more depth with each of them but it was still a good poem.
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Review of Can I?  
Review by Dallas
Rated: E | (4.5)
nicely written i must say. this is a piece of writing that a lot of people can relate to. which is very good as a writer, as the author you want to connect with your readers. I feel that you did just this. it has connected your words to the reader. something that can be hard for others. thank you for posting this for reviewers like me to read. I enjoyed it very much. keep on writing!! :)
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Review of Break Free  
Review by Dallas
Rated: E | (4.5)
Very interesting piece of writing I must say. However, I would adivse to possibly add more to the middle stanza. Maybe put in outcomes in a list like the first four lines in the first stanza. It could add a bit more to the poem, But it was very well written and thought out. I really enjoyed reading it. Keep up the good work! :)
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Review by Dallas
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
I do not think it fully loaded onto my computer, but it was very interesting and intriguing. In this part i was imediately drawn into the story. Not too mention, but extremely curious to see what was so special about the guy who was taken. Nice job!
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Review by Dallas
Rated: E | (3.5)
it was a very interesting read. You stumbled on the rhyme scheme i do not know if you meant to or not, but it was well written. nice job
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Review of Snow White  
Review by Dallas
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
It was a good story. Except how did the guy get there? what was he doing on the mountain top? You left that very vague the trick to writing a short story is to give the back ground of the situation. It is not very wise to leave the reader guessing on why the guy is on the mountain. It takes away from the story. But over all it was very good. keep up the writing
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Review of Sleep  
Review by Dallas
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
this was a very intriguing story. It had a good plot to it. Although i would maybe cut back on the visions that Jacob is having. It makes it diffucult at some points to follow the story of the accident. I absolutely loved how Jacob became the man commiting suicide. that was a verynice twist. keep up the good work!
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Review by Dallas
Rated: E | (5.0)
This was very good. It was very well written. i would make a slight format change with the ending though. it throws the writing off because it is all orderly in the beginning, but then it gets a bit jumbled. I loved the idea for it. It was well written and thought out very well. nice job :)
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Printed from http://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/devinc12