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Printed from http://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/negyth
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22 Public Reviews Given
Review Style
Hi there! I can tell you what your work makes me feel, the thoughts I get when I read and if I find something I can help you improve, I will tell you.
I'm good at...
I'm good at being honest and positive. But if I see something that isn't as it should be, I'll try to point it out for you.
Favorite Genres
Horror, sci-fi, fantasy, philosophical and emotional
Least Favorite Genres
Action. Erotica.
I will not review...
Extremely long stories, I want to but I don't have the necessary amount of concentration to chew my way through it.
Public Reviews
1
1
Review of Noticing Newbies  
Review by P. K. Jørgensen
In affiliation with The Newbies Academy Group  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
I don't have much to write anymore.

Thank for all the love and support.

And, welcome oldies and newbies. I won't be around a while, just stopped by. For good ol' memories sake.

Much love, nerds.

A rating of five, shapes one star.
But even that, is a lot of button smashing.

- Kaja
2
2
Review of Not Alone  
Review by P. K. Jørgensen
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello there! I was browsing Writing.com and I stumbled across these words of yours.
Keep in mind that I'm no expert, I'm just a fellow writer.

I come in peace!

Just a small thing before I get started. I noticed one tiny thing you missed and thought you'd like to know;

"Because who wants to (be?) friends
With a freak girl..."

And to answer that question...
Hello there! My name is Kaja, I am also known as a "freak"
Let's be friends :)

And to the exciting part of all these words, which I am sending you in return for sharing this piece.

(Oh my God, I want to tell you so many things. But I'll keep it simple. I don't want to invade.)

I think this is great, in the sense that I can feel the despair in this, I can even relate and so obviously, this deserves my compliments.

Keep writing.
A small advice: writing does help keeping the demons at bay. It is both a fun, creative and constructive way to cope with feelings and thoughts.

So. Keep writing!
~Kaja
3
3
Review of Haunted  
Review by P. K. Jørgensen
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This is beautiful and heartbreaking, I found you on the Review tab and thought I'd take a look.
Keep in mind, I'm no expert, I'm just a fellow writer and a new friend, you've yet to know.

I know... I can't say anything to mend your wounds and I can't even promise it'll ever get better.

But I will tell you that you did something right here, I could feel you and I'm sure your friend feel you as well.

So lighten up. Don't be sorry, just keep your precious friend close at heart~

Best of luck and keep writing!
~Kaja
4
4
Review by P. K. Jørgensen
Rated: E | (3.5)
Hi there! I found you on the "Read a Newbie"-tab. Keep in mind that I'm no expert of anything, I'm just a fellow writer.

Your writing is easy to follow, which I appreciate a lot, since English is only my second language.

Here's my thoughts!
Death is a strong subject to take up, but surely, it is not to be ignored either. Death comes, when it comes. It may bring peace of ones soul, or maybe we'll move on to another life, who knows?

Life however, I can easier comprehend: It is such a fragile yet precious gift and I'm glad you chose to write about both of the subjects.

It gives your poem some sort of forgiveness to it.

Everything doesn't have to be so dark, sometimes we just have to see through it and lit a candle for those we've loved and lost. So we can move on, being (for the moment) alive.

My only suggestion for this and I mean no offense:
It would be lovely if you'd switch life before death, since that's the natural way it happens, unless of course we've been reborn but we can't really know that for sure.
It would give your poem a more "natural" look, (in my opinion at least).

I wish you a healthy life and may you stay strong!

Keep writing!
~Kaja
5
5
Review of No One  
Review by P. K. Jørgensen
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hello! I found you on the "Read a Newbie tab." Keep in mind that I'm no expert on anything, I'm just a fellow writer.

When I read your poem, I realized that this isn't something I can simply read and move on, without throwing a review at it ;)
Your writing style is simple and easy to follow. It allows the reader to feel the despair of doubting oneself because others don't really see what we want them to see and the tormenting thoughts that follos, the loneliness and confusion. (This is something we can all relate to).
But please... Get rid of some of some of the blankness in the document, it's not being helpful (in my opinion at least.)

The next thing that struck my me, was the sentence; Everyday I wake up not knowing who I am or if I should pretend to be someone I'm not.
A friend once told me "Don't try to be someone else, they're all taken anyway." this is true, be yourself and be proud.

Here's what I've learned:
With time and patience, you can let people inside, let them get to know you and you will get to know yourself in the process.
The hardest part of changing the way people percieve you, is to be confident about yourself because whether you like it or not, you'll show more of what you want to show that way.

I can't say I know you and if this is helpful to you in any way, but I want you to know that there's hope for you yet. Just get back into the fight again!

Best wishes and keep writing!

~Kaja
6
6
Review by P. K. Jørgensen
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Hello! I found this on "Read a Newbie"-tab and since the subject is very close to me, I thought I'd drop a review in your direction. Keep in mind that I'm no expert, I'm just a fellow writer :)

I like your choice of words and I can relate to this ( I'll share my story with you soon ). You're good at painting a picture with words, keep it up!
If you want to do some more work on this little poem, then it would be worth it, there's still much to be said about the subject and you're off to a good start! Also if you do, please let me know ;)

A little story of mine:
I've had a close encounter with Death once, and it was very much like you've described. I had pneumonia and I was suffocating, my body was aching like "there was no tomorrow" and as my sight darkened, I realized I was dying. Hopefully a doctor arrived and I was off to the hospital.

Point of my little story is that, we should be grateful what we got, remember that we ARE mortals (whether we like it not) and though nothing lasts forever, it is still worth fighting for it.

I wish you the best of luck with your writing and your life.
Be strong, be happy and don't forget to "live" :D

Also! I'm giving you 3.5 stars because I think there's room for improvement.

~Kaja
7
7
Review of Words  
Review by P. K. Jørgensen
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is great, we all know this feeling and the frustrations of a writers block.
You did the right thing though, I think the best way out of that, is to just write whatever comes to mind. Sometimes we end up with weird stuff, other times, something good comes forth (like this piece of yours).

It can't hurt to try right? :)

When I look at a blank page, when I have a writers block, when I'm really frustrated and when I can't even type hello. I go for a walk and I become a sponge! I soak up people, nature and cities around me.
Maybe this'll work for you too? There's an adventure in everything around us, you just have to look around!

Well... I wish you the best of luck with your writing, keep at it!
(I also read your bio, I hope you'll get back on your feet again.) *Heart*

Read you around.
~Kaja
8
8
Review of Breathe  
Review by P. K. Jørgensen
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
Hi there! I'm here to share my thoughts on your piece. Keep in mind that I'm no expert on anything, I'm just a fellow writer.

I like the way you started this, "I breathe in - I breathe out"
Breathing is a good way to keep calm, it also a way to "feel" more intensively. In my own world, nothing is as intense as being admired and seen through.
The unknown mystery of what might become, is an adventure in itself: An un-read book of sorts, but though it hasn't been opened or read, it is still there... haunting us until we open it up and take a look inside.

We begin to grow.

As each page is read, slowly but surely, the mystery unfolds itself and then there'll be no need to rewind time. It needs to flow naturally, so we can greet our future and embrace those we love.

Just a kind request, I mean no offense with the following:
I had to read this quite a few times to make sense of this, (I don't know if it is my lack of proper English) but I'd like for you to read this through after a few weeks and perhaps, re-invent it because the idea is beautiful. I just think it is the way you chose to set it up, that confuses me.

Thank you for sharing this.

~Keep writing~

-Kaja.

9
9
Review of Snowflake  
Review by P. K. Jørgensen
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Thank you for writing this beautiful, yet painful piece.

Firstly, I'm just sharing my thoughts and opinions, I'm no expert on grammar but I feel like you did a great job! I didn't find anything to moan about there.

The story is very touching, the love of a young girl is something quite powerful and I hoped he'd kiss her regardless of his age, because that shouldn't keep lovers apart. On the other hand, I understand his worries.

Well crafted story, really, thank you for sharing this.

(And you better give her that goodbye kiss, Jack!)

~Keep writing~

-Kaja
10
10
Review by P. K. Jørgensen
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hello! My name is Panille Kaja, I noticed this by chance and thought I'd drop a few lines in your direction.

I'm a zombie lover and so this obviously called for my attention, instantly.

The rhyming was really enjoyable! The story was well written and easily understood and I'm glad his soul vanished for it is a cruel fate: to be a zombie with no jaw to chew. I do hope you keep writing and that you have a fantastic day.

Enjoy these 5 stars I'm giving you because even though zombies are cliche, you gave it a "fresh breath" and I have nothing to complain about, so I'm happy ;D

Read you around.
11
11
Review by P. K. Jørgensen
Rated: E | (3.5)
Hello my name is Panille Kaja and I have found you on the review page!

I really enjoyed your words and the image you've drawn with them; this strange world we live in, the fear which invades as we grow and the need to actively let go of it all because if we don't, what is left of "life"?

You raise a lot of questions, which is good, it keeps people reading but (and I'm not fond of "buts") I think you might want to work on the layout of your writing. Lots of punctuation dots right there.

All in all I still enjoyed the read and I did feel you there. Keep writing friend and welcome to WDC!
12
12
Review by P. K. Jørgensen
Rated: E | (5.0)
I'm yours at the very first line of your poem and I enjoyed reading it several times before writing this review.
It's a captivating view on life and it only gets better as I continue to read down. I really like this view on things. There's no reason to frown, take life for what it is and move forward.

My favorite part is:
Veer around the pit, and
keep your path lit
for darkness of the soul
is for you unfit.

Your choice of words and theme go well together and I have no complaints :)~

Thank you for sharing this and keep writing.

~Kaja~
13
13
Review of My Friend (At 8)  
Review by P. K. Jørgensen
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
I read this a few times. I like the way you write, I think it could use a bit more love and care. Also noticed this "my fist girlfriend." I'm pretty sure you meant "first" hehe, thought I'd mention it :) otherwise it was a good read and I liked the childish innocence around the hamster and how everything seems larger when we're kids. I did sort of miss the emotional parts of a story. Thank you for sharing.
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