*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/picodoll/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/sort_by_last/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/8
Review Requests: OFF
601 Public Reviews Given
603 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I am a published author. That doesn't make me an expert reviewer but it does means I've learned a few things about good writing. You can expect me to critique storytelling, character development, plot, transitions and other building blocks of writing. I will point out grammar and punctuation issues when I notice them but if you are looking for someone to give that kind review, there are others who will do far better than I. I try to be honest and encouraging but if you're requesting a review, I'm sure you expect it to be thorough. Good reviews sometimes hurt. I can't spare you that and give you an honest review.
I'm good at...
Critiquing your storytelling skills, especially first chapter reviews. I'm also good at building believable characters and recognizing good dialogue. I can review whole novels but my time is limited and it has to be worth my while.
Favorite Genres
Action adventure, comedy, historical, sci-fi and well-conceived fantasy.
Least Favorite Genres
Horror, Erotica, LGBTQ, Poetry. Some of this I don't like at all while the rest I am wholly inadequate to give a review on.
Favorite Item Types
Short stories, first chapters, and complete novels if they are not astronomically long.
Least Favorite Item Types
Extremely long novels, poetry, random chapters from the middle of a longer story.
I will not review...
Horror or Erotica. I will also not give reviews on random middle chapters. I don't believe they can be adequately reviewed out of context. Please don't ask me to review Vampire or Zombie stories. The sub-genre has been beaten to death and I don't want to read another one.
Public Reviews
Previous ... 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 -8- ... Next
176
176
Review of Forgiveness  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I really liked this poem. It is really well written. It has rhyme and rhythm and speaks to my soul. Writing is about communicating a thought, a feeling, an emotion. To really communicate so that someone else understands. I think this poem above all else succeeds at that at depth.

How to improve it? I don't know. I wouldn't change a thing.

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
177
177
Review of Deep Well  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Poetry is the hardest kind of writing for me to rate and try to constructively criticize on this site. I gave you a perfect score because I can't see anything wrong with it. I can identify a good poem when I see it but can't always explain why. What I like here is that your imagery and symbols all belong together. It has a progression to it that makes sense.

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
178
178
Review of Saving us  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Holland was a dangerous frightening place during the second world war. My parents grew up in that time and place and their teenage experience is completely alien to how I grew up. My dad's family built a little room in the manure pile on their farm so the fighting age men could go and hide there when the Razzi came calling. German soldiers didn't like getting their fingers dirty. Many Jews were sheltered by the Dutch and many were betrayed. Dutch people went to concentration camps along with the Jews they were sheltering. Thirty thousand Dutch starved to death before they were liberated. When I was ten my father made me stand on the battlefield at Nijmegen where Canadian troops marched in rank into the teeth of German Panzers. My spouse's uncle was one of those men. This subject is rather near and dear to me.

I think your writing shows potential. Don't let anyone discourage you. The biggest problem with this piece is that you don't seem to be able to decide whether to do the whole piece as journal entries or the streaming thoughts of Rena. It might help if there is a clear transition between what is written as journal and the part that clearly should not be in journal form. I would be shy about writing this in journal form anyway because people won't be able to help but think of Anne Frank.

As I said earlier though don't let me or anyone else discourage you. You obviously can write. Don't stop.

Pico.
179
179
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I like your poem. I imagine some people might be offended by the stereotypes but not me. I had a good chuckle and it's well written to. It has rhyme and rhythm. What a deal.

Looks like a typo in your french though. It should read, a sample pour vous.
180
180
Review of Bobby and Brian  
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is a well written piece. I do find the subject matter a little cliche. Granted that is just my opinion. My family runs thick with multiple births. I have brothers who are twins, cousins who are triplets and a set of twins of my own. The subject both attracts my attention and repels me.
181
181
Rated: E | (4.0)
Nice little breakfast poem. The rhyming is good but I get tangled up in the rhythm. If each line had the same rhythm it would be quite catchy maybe even something I might be mumbling half asleep over breakfast mysef.

Keep writing and enjoy yourself here.
182
182
Rated: E | (5.0)
I never did NaNoWriMo but I used the techniques you described here to write my first book. I don't think I would have ever gotten it down on paper if I hadn't. It took me two months to write my fifty thousand words and have a rough manuscript but I did it and am hoping to do it again. I think anyone wanting to author a book would benefit from the advice given in this article not just people doing the NaNoWriMo.
183
183
Review of Help Us Help YOU!  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
I will make an effort to follow the instructions here. I have been trying to participate here as much as possible hoping to get some real input on a book I wrote. I also just enjoy helping others. One thing I would like to see in your column is more information on how to get people to review longer items. (You may have already covered this in the past. I just might not have found it yet.) I'm as guilty as anyone. I review shorter items because I have the time. I wrote a short poem off the top of my head and received more reviews than I would have imagined. On the other hand I wrote a book and have plugged it here but so far I haven't gotten any reviews on it or any part of it.
184
184
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Nicely written. I liked the way you kept us guessing until the final revelation that Robert was the android at the end of the story. Part of me wishes we humans had a reset emotion button and other times I'm glad we don't. I've heard this theme before on several ocassions and it makes me wonder something. Do you think that if humans ever did successfully create androids to be that complex that we could have a relationship with one, that humanity in general would object? Something tells me that that isn't how it would go.
185
185
Review of Mesothelioma  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Kudos for an excellent article. Your research is good and you made it interesting to read. This past summer I worked in asbestos, lead paint and black mold abatement. Any building in Canada built between certain years is likely to contain a great deal of asbestos. Makes sense we were and likely still are one of the worlds biggest producers. It was in the plaster, concrete, floor tiles and pipe insulation. Nasty stuff.

Thanks again for writing something to let people know the truth.
186
186
Review of Thy Will Be Done  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Thought provoking story. I also thought it was well told although the twist at the end was rather expected. A question does come up though. The Brothers would not have supplied the impetus for Mats transformation had they known. Based on their interactions with the ship, they must have been aware that it had occurred. I know this is Mats story but how would have the Brothers resolved the issue created? They certainly had enough time to ponder the situation.
187
187
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a really good poem. Chronic pain is such a curse. I have loved ones close to me that suffer chronic pain and I know they would identify with what you have written. God thankfully is there to lean on and for many of us family too. God bless you.
188
188
Rated: E | (3.5)
The neutral artificial voice is a must when reading this for me or it doesn't quite achieve the right effect. I like it. The criticism I offer is that it jumps away from what is going through the robots malfunctioning brain to actions the robot is taking. I think it would be more effective if the point of view didn't make a subtle shift.
189
189
Review of Father's Love  
Rated: E | (2.5)
I like the way you put this poem together. You obviously have a whole lot more poet in you than I do. I don't like the concluding line though. I'm casting around for the reason and just would have either liked a more positive end or an additional verse making the reason for that conclusion more clear. The "daughter's pain" reference does point in that direction I just need a little more.
190
190
Rated: E | (3.5)
This is an interesting sibling rivalry story. I grew up with brothers and sisters and we deliberately got each other into trouble sometimes. In fact stealing cookies from the kitchen was something we took great delight in having my parents pin on the wrong culprit. Actually buying a vase and breaking it for a frame up was a little beyond our evil minds. I think what would have really made this story would be to weave in your brother's motive for going through all this trouble to make trouble for you. Kudos for prompting me to recall some childhood memories. My siblings and I still have a good laugh about stuff like this when we get together.
190 Reviews · *Magnify*
Page of 8 · 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/picodoll/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/sort_by_last/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/8