|First of all, I love how you mentioned that this piece was based on a song. So often, I find myself compelled to create a piece of writing based on music that I love.
I also love the transition that occurs in this story, how it begins with the main character about to walk out, but when something very serious happens (something that may further scare someone away from a career as a truck driver), the character takes the high road and makes a totally different decision! Way to go on character development and evolution!
If I may make a few suggestions:
A) There is a skip from past tense to present in the middle of a paragraph. "As time passes" would read easier if it began another paragraph, signifying and preparing the reader for the change in tense.
B: I've noticed that many lines towards the beginning seem very short, and I feel like they would be more powerful and descriptive if they were connected. Less periods, more commas! And...(this is just a thought, its not my place to tell you how to write) Was he all upset? Did he "make his way" into the foreman's office, or did he storm into it and fling the door open with a loud BANG as the doorknob smacked into the old drywall of the cheaply-constructed office?
My point is, I am really impressed at the way this story moved along, and completely got turned around at the end. I love it. I would encourage you to focus more on description OUTSIDE OF dialogue (which is also my kryptonite...I always have to go back and remove dialogue in narrative) and to expand your style more so that your paragraphs run more smoothly.
Thanks for sharing your writing! Please keep writing!