Lessons

This is about my dad, who died when I was 12.

Where to go
Where to hide
What to do
When he died

Will I know
The truth he said
His last words
On his deathbed

By him I was
Trained and taught
Taught to fight
When life was dust

The life I live
The life I know
Seems innocent as
New-fallen snow

But in my head
A war rages on
Bloody and harsh
Till the living are gone

The swords seem to gleam
In the liquid red light
And my heart just beats faster
With fight after fight

He trained me so well
My mind and my heart
But still I wonder
Why did he start

Why did he start
Just to leave
Why did he die
So we would grieve

Unless it's a lesson
His last but his first
But now I'm confused
And for knowledge I thirst

Can't someone tell me
The truth in the lie
Why he didn't finish teaching
Why did he die?