by hossam eldin
how to deal with people
The good , the bad and you!
Everyday in our lives we see a different man , a different woman , sometimes our relations reach another level where we get closer to someone who we thought that we know his/her character, but the fact is we did not .
People are different , its true , but sometimes the same person changes from character to another character , and the same person becomes different , it happened to me once , I used to know someone who was very kind and respected everyone around him but when I spent more time with him I found out that he was the complete opposite .
Some people are more important than other people , you have to know how to deal with your partner at work more than knowing how to deal with the man sitting next to you in the bus , but either way , you have to be able to deal with everyone at anytime and in different situations to live your life with no obstacles .
Think about your boss at work , your future wife or husband , your neighbor , your business partner . do you know how to deal with them ? , if you know them well you will be able to deal with them well , it is just like a key to a closed door , if you have the key, the door will not be closed , do you have the key that leads to their friendship and trust ? , in this chapter you will be able to find that key because nothing is more important than friends and people who affect on your life .
As I said in the beginning , there are so many kinds of people , of course we are not going to talk about every man and woman in the universe , only the main sorts of people that you probably see in daily life .
The rude kind
It is the most difficult kind that’s why we have started with it , this kind will treat you with cruelty and no respect , he or she does not trust in anyone , unconsidered , he or she has the feeling of the only opinion is his or her opinion , arrogant and self centered , likes people to feel his or her importance , has the determination in discussion but only his or her opinion counts , how can you deal with such a person who is totally aggressive and ready to attack at anytime .
If you are unlucky enough to meet such a person you should remain calm no matter what he/she says , imagine if he/she was your boss , how would you react ? you do not want to fight with your boss unless you have another job of course , try to listen to him/her carefully may be he/she says something important or something you can use to know his/her character better , you should give him/her the feeling of acceptance , it means that you accept dealing with him/her no matter what he/she says , this will make him/her be less aggressive but at the same time do not give him/her the feeling that you are weak or scared of him/her , the result would be depressing , you should be understanding but firm .
During discussion , use his/her information and ideas but express your opinions and ideas with confidence , treat him/her with respect as it is the best way to treat people and he/she will get the idea in the end .
Do not expect him/her to change , may be .. may not , but if you treat him/her right, all troubles with you two will be solved and the ship will sail , that’s the most important thing , but making people change needs people,s intention and willing to change .
The friendly kind
This type of a person is who we would like to be with everyday , we want to be like him or her , this type is a dream to everyone who finds dealing with people is a hard thing to do .
All of us want all people to be friendly with us , no body wants to fight with the other , no body likes bad words , bad temper , and terrible manners , we want simple people who smile to our faces in the morning , at work , in the club , even in the bus , prophet muhammed said ( smiling to your muslim brother is a good deed as charity is) .
This character is very calm , relaxed and has a smiling face , he or she trusts people and also a self confident person , likes to hear words of admiration , he/she has a good heart and a great hospitality, a loveable person , everyone likes to sit beside him/her and talks , this person has some disadvantages like being unorganized , does not appreciate time's value , but at the same time he/she feels good about himself and about people too , treats people with respect, a good companion , he/she feels security all the time .
You may say ( what a treasure ) , you are right , such a person is a real treasure , he or she can be your friend when you are having troubles in making new friends , he or she can be your brother or your sister if you are a lonely child , imagine if you have such a person at work , someone you can talk to , someone who is a natural born helper who is willing to help you no matter what and has the intention of being a true friend to you and more .
We have always suffered during our first day at any place , school , college , work , we used to look for a friend who has a pure heart as heaven's rivers , that type is the true friend , the true brother and sister , you are going to find nothing but mutual respect , kindness , good companion and a longtime friendship .
I know what you are thinking right now , you would love to meet such a person and your intention would nothing but keeping this person closer to you for a long time .
A good friend is very precious in life , no matter where this friend is , at work or at school , life would be easier if you had a good friend like this type , but the question is how to keep him as a friend ? how to avoid losing him in a moment of misjudgment and carelessness ?
Well , to keep him /her as a friend you should treat him/her with respect as he/she treats you , you should not think less of him/her because he/she is so friendly to you and respects you , some people thinks that good ones are the weakest ones , it is not true , kindness is not weakness , kindness is the complete opposite , the strong person is the one who helps the others and wish them good and wins their love and respect , not the one who thinks he or she is above the mankind , only him/her deserves respect but the other does not , believe me this is the weakness , do you know why ? because he or she will end up alone , no one would love him/her , no one would help him/her , but the good person is the one who has people around him/her , loving him/her and willing to help him/her at anytime no matter what , so my advice to you dear reader , do not think less of the friendly type .
Sometimes when we find a person who is a good listener and considered we go on and on without giving him or her the chance to say what he or she wants to say , that is a disrespect , and we agreed on mutual respect right ? , so you should be a good listener as he or she is , if you are his or her supervisor you should listen to his /her suggestions and ideas that may take your business to high levels , even if his/her ideas are not good enough for a while , when you keep on giving him/her the chance he/she will work harder and harder to prove himself/herself to you as an important element to the business . not only the business , what if he/she is having troubles at work or something and he/she wants to share it with you as a natural human communication , when such a thing takes place you should be the brother he/she is looking for , do not turn your back to him/her, because we need each other .