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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/view_item/item_id/1755472-Warning-The-FDA-Hasnt-Evaluated-This
Rated: 18+ · Sample · Health · #1755472
My Formula for Weight Management,Overall Health & Anti-Aging.Prsonal exp disguised as fic


 
"Warning!  The FDA Hasn't Evaluated These Statements
or My 30 Seconds a Day to Cheap Natural Weight Management, Overall Health and Anti-Aging"
by
Troy Anne Arrandale


 

 

 

 
- Preface - 


 

           The things that happen to the woman and her body in this book happened to me, but I made up the woman herself.  (Because I certainly never had the face of a model!) And The Caveman, and what happens to him, of course, is completely made up, but what happened to him is based on long hard research that I did.                 This story shows how I like being able to stay overall healthy in the simplest way, so that I have the rest of my free time for actually living!  And what money (I am extremely lowincome) that I have left over, to go to enjoyment!  If I, a single woman with a cat, can do this, live happily and healthily on only $694/month in 2010, which the government says is actually below what it thinks is "poverty," then I'm sure you can too!  Your answer to doing this is here, meaning the "formula," which is a 5oz. drink I drink once a day.
           For those of you battling health issues with very little money, and who are tired of shortterm answers and medications only to have other health issues come up, think of this drink, this formula, as your "IRH" account instead of your "IRA" account.  "Individual Retirement Health" account instead of "Individual Retirement Account."  You spend something now (approximately $38 a month) so that you'll be healthy enough now and when you retire, to not even need an IRA for medical stuff!
           Over and over, I've also experienced this: "You are what you eat."  But I say it like this: "What goes in (food, substances, supplements), makes what goes out (from your cells to tissues, to organs, to muscles, to all the way out in your skin, nails, and hair)."{/linespace          
         Arrandale - 1
         
            
1


                                         The football player padding moved with her as she moved, only it was her skin.  She bent down to open the cupboard under the kitchen sink in her ThanksgivingDay clothes as she prepared for her ThanksgivingDay trip to her relatives' house, her upper legs suddenly locking in place and her hands grabbing the counter for support as her middle back suddenly felt pain, and it was no longer a girlygirl's body that was bending.  It was still feminine, but over the past year had become shaped as if its upper part had become a football player, making her lift and move all its padding everywhere at a mediumslow pace as she shifted about the kitchen inside her efficiency apartment that morning.  Even the mediumslow pace was not her normal lifelong pace, and over the last month had been getting even slower.  Still, the footballplayer padding was proportional and should've been able to easily move with no extra stress or strain to her back, but it didn't.  It was strange that the very relatives she was about to see, whose natures had always been to spontaneously comment on hers and each others' appearance on sight whether it was positive or negative, hadn't said anything about her uncharacteristic, firsteverinherlife weight gain the last time they'd seen her.
           Suddenly she went from the bentover position to levering herself upright again with a groan, farting a few times rapidly as she came up, gently but quickly shook out her hands as she softly burped once, and then she frowned.  She'd smelled something again, but it wasn't her farts.  Those never did seem to smell, and they were the kind she couldn't feel - the kind she never could tell were coming - and she couldn't control them.  But the smell was new, something she'd never had until a month ago, it always hovered outside of her clothes in front of her chest and pelvic area even after she washed, was reminiscent of... beer hops, not sweat, and was unpleasant. 
                     As a matter of course that morning as she got ready for her trip she dealt with these six problems - the smell, the back pain, the weight gain, the farts, random burping, the fingerbone pain - as well as the nineteen specific other problems she had, just as she did every day when she got out of bed: by handling the fallout of each one as they cropped up one by one, and also by disciplined preventative measures.  To handle the smell she went into her tiny bathroom and lifted her shirt and bra, there resoaping, rerinsing, redrying, redeodorizing and pulling them back down because she'd already taken a shower that morning.  Her daily preventives were this:  the type of food she ate, how she ate it, the substances she avoided, the medications and natural supplements she took, and by the two ways she kept stress out of her life:  first, by studying her health problems and keeping on top of newlybreaking health information, and second, by her personal spirituality.
                     In a casual way as if she were used to it, before leaving the bathroom she took care of the fallout of another health problem: after rewashing her chest under her clothes, she carefully checked the bathroom sink, picked out the two or three very long blonde hairs that had fallen into it out of her head by her doing nothing more than moving in a natural way as she had washed as she stood over it, fingered them off into the trash and for the moment avoided dealing with the fallout of yet another of her health problems by walking out of the bathroom back into the kitchen and on the counter lining up eight supplements and four medications to take: digestive enzymes in capsule form - swallowed to break down her food inside her stomach - were the first among the natural supplements.  Of the four medications, there was a gel capsule that was the chemical replacement for progesterone, which was a female hormone her body had lately almost completely lost for some reason.  No young woman had worked to be healthy by such extensive means in her own life.  And by following exactly what the experts were saying.
                     And yet it had failed. And was still failing.  She wasn't healthy despite living healthy.
 
                    ----
         A few years ago, when she was working in the news room of the Plano SunExpress, her hair had been just as long and full and blonde.  She was completely ignorant about food and health at that time, which was when she was at the peak of her health.  This was ironic because something invisible was happening inside her body that was going to change all that.  It would change her health for the worse and then that would cause her to become very knowledgeable about food and health.
           That day a few years ago while she was working at the newsroom of the Plano Sun-Express, while being very slender and quiet with the type of face and body and movements inside her tasteful sexy outfits and studious eyeglasses (that she was unaware of spoke "sex" to everyone around her) she became a diabetic.
           She had had a lot to do that day what with being a journalism night student, fulltime receptionist for the paper, and trying to work in writing a feature article in between answering calls because she was attempting to break in and make extra money as a features reporter at that very paper.  She always did a good job at all three things but never had a whole lot of time to do the features so she always had to push herself a bit.  Normally this was not a problem but that day it seemed to be because she was feeling unusually tired and couldn't get herself from one place to another very quickly like she usually could.  The bustle had gone out of her hustle.  And it had come on her relatively quickly.  She had seemed fine yesterday.
   
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