1. Me and science are like oil and water. Which means I have no idea what that means.
2. Belt companies must be so glad that gravity exists.
3. My psychic said I'm going to die in six months. Or was that my doctor?
4. Is it just me or does Elmer's make horrible chap stick?
5. If one more person calls me a "dumb, crazy, boring, tall, skinny, ugly, hairy, overly sensitive, Lego eating, flower planting, lima bean throwing, Advil addicted, Snow White & the Seven Dwarves watching, Big League Chew bubble gum stealing, Frisbee golf enthusiast"…I’m gonna lose my mind!
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