Choose Kindness From the Menu
|This started out as a blog entry almost eight years ago, but upon the suggestion of someone I admire, I decided to make it a static item that I can add to, at will.|
4,234 Views later, I would argue that it's still relevant.
This is my opinion and, not necessarily anyone else's. No one is perfect, least of all, me. I tend to nurse grudges, I confess.
What prompted this outburst or rumination?
It is not just one thing. The biggest thing is giving donations or bidding and winning, and then hearing......
not hearing "thank you"
There is always stuff going on here.
There are always fundraisers and activities where gift points are solicited.
There are plenty of successful activities and then there are those that do not work. I do not know why some work and some do not. When they work, they are very very positive.
Here are some tips for you if you solicit gift points, time, or whatever from others.
Remember that we all have choices to make in our behaviors and in our philanthropic decisions.
1. Always do what you promised in a timely manner.
2. Under-promise and over-deliver. Try not to do the opposite of that, or you will get a reputation that is not good.
3. Do not rely on others to fulfill your promises unless it is a real legitimate emergency. Life happens and it knocks us over at times. We all understand that it does. Try and fulfill your promises eventually and most people will be kind about it.
4. Always say thank you if someone donates or gives you something to help out and do it RIGHT AWAY. Do not fool around with your thank moos. Thank people for doing nice things. Make a habit of it and become known for it.
5. Do not use the hard work of others to puff yourself up.
6. Make sure you thank after it is all over, not just while you have an ongoing need. Don't butter people up when you need things and ignore them otherwise.
7. Pay it forward means to do for others without expecting stuff in return. But that doesn't mean that the people paying it forward don't expect you to be polite and thank them. It means that they don't expect you to reciprocate. If they do it anonymously, then that means they don't care about the thanking part. Otherwise, always assume that they want to be thanked. Find a way to make that happen.
8. Don't just do things to get attention and be noticed and don't just help people who give you gift points and who pay for your upgrades.
9. When someone bids on and wins your package in an auction, do not treat fulfilling that package, as the biggest burden that anyone has ever been forced to carry and something you'd like to avoid at all costs.
Do not continually offer up packages when you have no intention of seeing things through.
It was a situation like this that prompted this essay back in 2014. It seems to be an ongoing pattern for some here.
10. Don't use a big luring promise of prizes and awards to promote your activities (in reality promoting yourself), then find a way to weasel out of giving out the prizes when one or more people actually spend their valuable time doing the work to support your activity. If one person does a substantial amount of work based on your seemingly honest promises, you should step up, put on your big person clothes and do what you committed to do in the first place. You know. Like a responsible adult would do.
It all really boils down to this:
Be considerate of the efforts of others, and do be kind and you will be fine.