The helplessness and desperation of being trapped in your body that doesn't obey you
He gnawed restlessly at his carrot puree, barely tasting it. He had no teeth so it was all he could he eat these days. It didn't taste good, but it kept him full.
He glared at the room of people as they walked by listlessly, without paying any attention to him despite the brightly coloured puree dribbling out the side of his mouth and onto the rag they had hung carelessly around his neck for exactly such a purpose. The lady feeding him was talking and laughing haphazardly with her partner - she didn't seem particularly concern that he couldn't keep half his food in his mouth.
To get her attention, he made an attempt to get his drinking cup in front of him but his sense of orientation only left him waving uselessly in mid-air. The feeding lady nonchalantly picked it up and put it in his hand and continued her hearty conversation with the man. Frustrated, he swung the cup as hard as he could across the room without even taking a sip.
He saw her pause for a moment, probably unsure whether to be mad or not, but in the end, she merely crossed the room, picked up the cup and placed it on the table in front of him again. Apparently she was used to these kinds of behaviours here.
He tried to plead with her, first with his eyes - but when she did not break her conversation with the man she was talking to, he tried to tell her. But all that managed to pass his quivering lips were grunts and moans. He was unable to articulate anything he wanted into a sensible sentence. Still, she continued talking and merely patted his back carelessly when his moans got louder and more persistent. She threw her head back laughing hard at something clever the man must have said and her hair brushed against his face. In his anger, he tried to grab a lock of it to pull it, not caring that it would hurt her. Unfortunately his reflexes stalled and her hair floated harmlessly between his fingers.
Then he felt it - the rumbling in his torso. He fidgeted in his seat nervously. He knew very well that it was the movement of his bowels stirring inside him. Most times it didn't bother him but at times, it would hurt and the pain seemed like it would never stop. He could feel that this one was going to be a painful one. There was no controlling it, it wreaked havoc in his stomach and without warning, the contents of his stomach flushed itself out of his body and into the big diaper the woman had put him in. As it happened, he clinched his hands into a fist and tolerated with the pain. It passed for a few seconds before washing over him again in a second wave.
The woman didn't even notice his predicament. When the pain finally subsides, he realised he had been holding his breath. He inhaled deeply and in a moment of helplessness, he lets out a wail of despair. Tears collect in his eyes and slid off the sides of his face.
The man and the feeding lady finally stop speaking and turned their attention to him. The man hastily picks up his suitcase and makes his excuses to leave. Before he does, he plants a longing kiss on the woman's lips and then a quick one on the top of his head, making a point to sniff the little hair there was on his bald head.
The lady extended her index finger and peered into his diapers, wrinkling up her face as the smell hits her nose.
"Ooh, someone made a big messy poo-poo, didn't he?"
She removed the soiled diaper, clean up his bottom with a wet wipe and expertly put on a fresh diaper. When she was done she picked him up into her arms and whispered sweet nonsense into his ear. Still he moved restlessly in her arms and made short bursts of cries, indicating that he was still hungry.
The man she was talking to suddenly came back into the room. "I forgot my keys," he said sheepishly. Then, indicating to the other 2 children in the kitchen, he said, "Guys, come on, you're going to be late for school!" He kissed each of them goodbye and ran out the door again.
With her husband and kids out of the house, she slipped her sleeve off her shoulder and pushed her teat into the mouth of her restless baby boy until he drank himself into a stupor and fell asleep in her arms.