A woman tries to talk herself out of hosting Thanksgiving.
|Internal dialogue written for "The Dialogue 500" with prompt: You try to talk your way out of hosting Thanksgiving dinner.
Okay, I'm not doing it this year. I am NOT hosting Thanksgiving. Or should I say, I'm not hosting it AGAIN? I "always" do it and I'm not this year. I'm just NOT. Of course, if I don't, who will? Jeff? Hahaha! Not likely. He doesn't even make ramen noodles. Of course, that means if I COULD talk him into it, we'd probably have something store bought. That's not terrible, but I can do better. But even if I was willing to settle for a store bought Thanksgiving, where would we sit in his studio apartment?
Well, Shelly certainly won't do it. It's enough just to get her and her flock of hellions to show up for Thanksgiving with someone else cooking. They always show up late and the kids are a mess. She always says she'll bring something, but then apologizes that she didn't have enough time to make it. I learned not to count on her a long time ago. If she hosted it, we'd show up and she'd be apologizing as she makes us PB&J.
Mom isn't up to hosting Thanksgiving anymore, and really hasn't been for quite a few years. It's alright, though. The cats have become a bit of a problem these last few years. I keep telling her she has enough, but she never seems to stop collecting them. There's fur everywhere and the smell is out of control.
Okay, I'm doing it this year. I am hosting Thanksgiving. Or should I say, I'm hosting it AGAIN!