Do you believe in your true love? Is it that one person to find or is it eventually made?
| Do you believe in true love? |
This is a question often asked by nearly everyone, especially those alone.
Are you one who believes that, given time, their right match will come along, almost like the second half of a magnet set adrift, aimed ever towards its chance to be whole. Or are you in your ideal relationship, but convinced that out of 8 billion people alive there is probably someone out there who is a "better match" for you than who you are with.
While both are common and equally valid philosophies , I know in any true relationship (much like that between a tremendous oak and a lithe vine) two people grow together. Each shaping the other ever towards a truer self. For this reason even if there is a better match out there than who is before you now, many are rooted enough in routine daily life to make that fact irrelevant if we simply never get the chance to come across that person during our lifetimes. Since we grow together the experiences we share make continuing a relationship that has lasted for years worth much more rewarding that to cut ones union short for a new one, even if we did have some divine foresight that assured us of that individual's superior compatibility.
For example, if you live in a small town with few eligible bachelors, knowing you have to make a match with someone during adolescence, or else risk waiting until after college to move into the greater world and make your choice from a larger pool. You make your choice early, get to share growing up and selecting the rest of your lives together. Sure you may not have been a perfect match, so once you move to a larger city, a greater university, or a bigger office you meet someone better "suited" than your partner. How much better of a match do they have to be to make worth hurting the other person and throwing aside those years spent in order to start anew. If you have a great partner for a lifetime and only do indeed find your "perfect match" once you are already in your sixties, could several years of possibilities be able to measure up to the golden years you have spent that last 40 shaping together, or would they have the potential to surpass them. Only someone who has lived with their true love could say for sure, but with 8+ billion people out there whose to say that, no matter how perfect a love, there isn't still someone better out there. Perhaps you may be lucky enough to find your one true love, only to have someday one be born who is even better, like a resurected dali lama or like some anti-christ, come to signal the end of your love life.
All I know for sure is that some people get into relationships that do not work, entering them to remain individuals or to mold the other person with no intention of being molded in return. If those relationships are doomed to end in seperation than is it not better to end it quickly, or better yet to avoid entering them all together and just wait for someone a little better. I know that we might not have always been perfect for each other, but after five years it's gonna take a hell of an upgrade to make me so much as consider throwing those memories away (a.k.a. not happening).
At the same time, if there is main theme and central message here, one must consider this; if two people are a good match and do shape each other through a meaningful relationship, then is it not in fact inevitable that that one person out there who is a true and perfect match for you, due to all of the variables to consider in deciding who is to be such a match, will no longer be your match once your partner shapes you in their form. At the same time this "perfect match" is not going to be held in some form of stasis, like sleeping beauty from the fables, they are bound to have a dynamic life as well. Probably one that incorporates a love of their own, making them just as likely to change as you are. But while this means that after a time this true love of yours may no longer match who you are, there is just as much a chance that someone else could grow into being a potential true love for you, perhaps maybe even the person you are already with.
Piano by Kiesza
When I try to run away you make me think of fight back
And I don't think that I've ever had a feeling like that
Oh your love is not fiction
It's the realest I've seen
But you don't even know what you're doing to me, yeah