A NEW BOOK ON MARRIAGE RELATIONSHIP
Flowing from ‘Day Six’, we shall dance around letter ‘U’ of the DASYN HUB. ‘U’ stands for ‘Uber.’ The uber husband has the following character traits: • A husband for every woman. • No sense of morality. • So flexible that he is never decisive on issues. • Ready to sacrifice his marriage for any strange woman who offers him better lifestyle and support. • Challenge-averse. • Behaves and lives as if not married. • Works smartly. • Very social. • Very determined. • Develops thick skin to insults. • Confident and self-assured. • Resilient and sustaining. • Enjoys food from the eateries more than what the wife cooks. • Compares wife to other women. • A visitor to the matrimonial home. • Providing for the needs of the wife and family.
The ‘uber’ type of husband is a husband for every woman that cares to offer to philander. He is bereft of moral scruples; very indecisive, ready to sacrifice his marriage for any strange woman who offers him a better lifestyle and support. He does not like to tackle challenges. Though he is a hard and smart worker, he behaves as if he is not married. He is very social and determined and thus has developed a thick skin to insults. He compares his wife to other women and likes eating out; though very self-confident, self-assured, and resilient. He, as well, sustains his marriage.
Uber husbands are always not at home, usually at work. They come home as if they were visitors. They are always working to provide the material needs of their wives and family members, but have little or no time for them. There was this story I read from the public domain about a husband who came home from a journey and sneaked into his bedroom. Unknown to him, he was sighted by his very young son who was in the kitchen with the mother. The son called out to the mother, “Mum, mum, I saw a stranger entering your bedroom.” The wife in her confused state did not know what next to do: whether to call the police or dare the ‘stranger.' While in this state of confusion, the husband walked into the kitchen. Her mood immediately brightened, and she explained to the son that the ‘stranger’ he sighted entering the bedroom was his father.
I once saw myself in this category, but thanks again to knowledge. I am no longer so. I started a friendship with the wife of my youth at 17, and from 19 until now in my 50’s, I have almost always been at work and spent very little time at home. I usually left home before 9 a.m. and returned later than 9 p.m. to ensure that I gave time to my tasking job schedules and also for personal development. I tried hard to provide for the material needs of my wife and family members but had very little time for them. However, with the knowledge I now possess, remedial actions are being put in place. For instance, I make it a point of responsibility to spend my holidays away from home together with my wife and available family members, and where I have assignments that take me away from home for more than two weeks, I also travel with my wife. This expediency of my presence now affords me the privilege of adding and deriving so much intrinsic benefits from the relationship.