by Don Two
How the root beer float came to be.
|In the Kingdom of Sassafras so long ago,
Old King Hires discovered the first root beer float.
He drank plenty of root beer from his royal mug,
and he sat on his throne oh so sated and smug.
Now it happened that Queen Wilhelmina did scream
at the servants to bring her vanilla ice cream.
So the servants in panic did scramble about
to placate Wilhelmina because of her shout.
(It was fortunate Sassafras lay way up north
where the snow and the ice and the cold did come forth.
There were plenty of alcoves in castle you see
to keep ice cream on tap to serve the royalty.)
Wilhelmina was mouthing her ice cream with zest;
Old King Hires gulped root beer and barked, “It’s the best!”
Yet fore long king and queen argued like bitter foes;
(at one point Hires said, in disgust, “So it goes!”)
This enraged Wilhelmina—her face turned to red;
she was fire and anger to what Hires said.
So she picked up a glob of ice cream from her dish
and she threw it at Hires and heard it go, Splish!
Old King Hires kept dignity best that he could
simply wiping his beard like a Norwegian would.
But the ice cream assault had a bit of good cheer
as a hunk of it landed in Hires’ root beer.
It was there that the King, in the state he was in,
tossed aside any ire and beamed a broad grin.
For the ice cream in root beer was gift from above,
and he turned to his queen and said, “Thank you, my love!”