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 |  My life in Tel Aviv. Welcome to Israel! |
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Shalom! I was born outside of Haifa, moved to Tel Aviv when I was twelve, and served in the Israeli Defense Force for two years. Now, I am a student at TAU. I hope I can show the world the humanity of my nation. We're not so different, after all.
** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Whoever destroys a single life is as guilty as though he had destroyed the entire world; and whoever rescues a single life earns as much merit as though he had rescued the entire world. |
| 1:00 A.M. - Home I am curious if this is different in every culture or if it is basically the same. What are the top things that make people happy? For me: family, a good meal, the quiet of a Saturday, good company, flirting with strangers, live comedy shows, a strong cup of coffee, hugging a long-lost friend, the beach when the sun is setting... |
| 6:05 P.M. - Cafe At the ridiculous Fatah convention, the PA decided that, yes, Israel was to blame for Arafat's death. These Palestinian groups come together to be diplomatic and they can't even agree with one another! Well done, Palestinians. Thanks for criticizing Israel for not focusing on your issues, and then proving Israel's point by not even focusing on these issues yourselves! I mean, really? This is what you want to discuss? Arafat? 6% of Israelis believe Obama is pro-Israel. That's down from the 45% who thought he was six months ago. I am watching 'Waltz With Bashir' again tonight. I think that movie might be my favorite modern movie  . |
| 10:00 P.M. - Home Yes, I did wear a flimsy skirt outside today in the wind, which blew up and gave everyone on the boardwalk a great view of my underwear and legs. So embarassing. And some guys applauded, which was very gentlemanly of them, the animals. Oi vey. One more day until the weekend. And I really, really want to cut my hair. |
| 2:30 A.M. - Home In case it is raining and you are interested in some Israeli filmmaking  .The Bubble: http://www.youtube.com/view_play_list?p=DDC397C6DBE46F42&search_query=the+bubble... And like five minutes of this old Israeli comedy: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gZO_FsHauA4 |
| 3:45 P.M. - Cafe I think my stereotypes were harsh, so, here are five things I admire about Westerners: 1. You are hard-working and proud. People go to places like America and comment on how many Americans will take jobs very seriously and do almost anything to finish a job. 2. You are generous and charitable. 3. You take "equality" very seriously. Women and men are the same, and so are all ethnicities. At least in theory. 4. Your wallets. Just kidding . But yes, I do love the support you have generally for Israel.5. You would never stand for any mass atrocity. You would never sit there and do nothing if people in your borders were being opressed. You would fight for them, and this is admirable. Also, I like your movies . Going to see Leonard Cohen here in September  . |
| 2:30 P.M. - Home I was going to talk about how our FM Avi Lieberman is a shekel-laundering scam artist, but then I got bored writing the paragraph. And then I was going to say something really deep and insightful about hatred, but then I lost my train of thought. And then I was going to comment on how my 19-year-old brother has decided to never leave the army, but I don't know how I feel about that so I had nothing really to say. So I clicked on a link sent to me by a WdC friend that is the "Country Test". So you answer some stupid questions and they tell you what country your personaity matches. Except that I think the test was for Americans, because my result? Israel. But the description! Look: "You're Israel! Though a victim in the past, you've learned very little from this and have encouraged a cycle of violence in your life and the life of many you know. You're a little paranoid and somewhat schizophrenic, causing you to promote both hatred and hope in cycling intervals. Some of the paranoia is justified, as a lot of people don't like you, but more people are helping you than you'd ever really admit to. At this point, you live on some valuable property and would benefit greatly from just giving peace a chance." Oh, so true, yes. Every day I sit and I think, how can I best obtain hope from hatred? And then I realize, yes! I should terrorize people. I should most definitely not learn anything from history and I should be as schizophrenic as possible. And I should hate as hopefully as possible, because nobody likes a pessimistic hater. Good news! A large number of Darfur refugees with gain a new home in Israel. We have created a center, housing, psychological services, medical help, and educational assistance to the victims of the Sudanese genocide. This makes me feel very proud. Enough talk. Beach and falafel and frozen pomegranate juice . |
| 7:17 P.M. - Tel Aviv Very sad. Last night at a Gay and Lesbian center here in Tel Aviv three innocent people were shot and two were killed by an extremist. They were teenagers. They were innocent, and I am horrified. Today I went to a vigil to honor them and to comfort their loved ones, and the same vigils were held also in Jerusalem. I don't cry often, but how could you not? And who did it? Who do you think? A Palestinian. So, international community, I ask you: do we have the right to strike back? Do we have the right to be angry? Will you call us executioners if we mourn? This terrorist walked right into this center and shot three of our youth. Tel Aviv is a safe place for gays and lesbians! Tel Aviv is a place where we accept others! We do not judge here! We do not hate! How DARE this Arab come in and ruin all that? And take the lives of innocent people? I'm furious and sad and this is why it's so hard to believe in G-d. Because this just isn't fair. |
| 4:38 P.M. - beach If you ever find yourself hungering for a trip to old Yis'rael, Westerners, it is not enough to use the iSpeakHebrew application on your iTouch. Whether or not you can correctly pronounce "Yom Kippur" or "Ani Yoda'at Rak Milim Achadot" (I can count the Hebrew words I can say on one hand) is less important than if you can play the part. Certain Hebrew words or slang you should always, always know for your own safety; words like "bomb" or "missles" or "suicide attack" or "Arab" or "high risk" or "get the hell out of the city". But what you really need to enjoy your time in Israel is the ability to act like an Israeli. So, here we go. Seven ways to act like an Israeli Sabra: 1. Do not say please. Do not say sorry. Do not use superfluous manners because you'll look like a needy child. If you want something, get it, and if you must ask do not act like you in any way depend on what you are asking for. Don't let someone convince you that they're doing you a favor by getting this thing for you. You deserve it, whatever it is. Remember this. 2. When you drive (and I would suggest not), let no one in your lane. "Merging" in Israel is not merging. It's the bigger car forcing your little hybrid off the road. Also the American "speed limit" system is irrelevant here. One thing we took from the Germans is an appreciation for the Autobahn. 3. Be respectful of the religious. And by religious I mean Jews, of course. Even if you don't even know the lyrics to Hava Nagila you are to listen to what they say and pretend to be interested. If they need help, help them. This is their country. 4. Nothing is open on the Sabbath. The Sabbath is Saturday. If you are in Jerusalem, you won't even be able to buy a newspaper. If you're in Tel Aviv, some little places are open but nothing useful. Only 60% of Israelis are actually Orthodox, but the rest of us love a day off. Buy everything you need ahead of time or you'll be forced to buy hummous and falafel from the Arabs, who will try to mess with you and charge you ridiculously high because they know you're a tourist. (Israelis will attempt to charge you more, too, but it's better not to argue). 5. Never shut up. The true Israeli is always talking, arguing, debating, scolding, yelling, laughing, joking...Why do the Hasidem always rock when they read the Talmud? Because there's a cute little line in the Torah that says Jews are "like candles". It means we're hyperactive and we find everything worth commenting on. Nobody here is shy. 6. Don't bother dressing up. Don't bother saying the Hebrew equivalent of "Mr" and "Mrs" and "Dr". We don't do formality. Everyone introduces themselves as Yossi or David or Moshe (pronounced "yo-see", "dah-veed", and "moi-shah", and Hebrew for Joey/Joseph, David, and Moses) or whatever their names might be. You are equals, not inferiors. 7. Smile! Be happy! Yes, we are always at war. Yes, we are all pyschologically-screwed up from fighting this war. Yes, the world pretty much denies us the right to live here. So what? Dance! Laugh! Go to the beach! Life is good . Life is short, but life is good and every Israeli knows this.Now you can not be so Western if you ever visit Israel. What would an Israeli tourist in America have to keep in mind? |
| 3:33 A.M. - Home Just spent some really great hours dancing and dancing and dancing with the soldiers who are home for the weekend and some friends and a bunch of people wanting to let loose. Some a bit more than others ...You know how sometimes you just get in the mood and don't care about anything? And you just do whatever the hell you want to because life is too short and you suddenly don't even care about tomorrow? And maybe you're all conservative during the day but then it's dark and you've got energy and your hair looks really fantastic? It's night's like this that remind me how much I LOVE Tel Aviv! Cheers, everybody! L'Chaim! |
| 7:00 P.M. - Tel Aviv!! Home. My father is released, healthy, and enjoying my mother's warm challah. I am back in Tel Aviv and tired, but happy to be home . I will be Catholic for a paragraph. I have a confession. I was very, very rude to someone today. Very rude. But she was rude first, so I think that I am justified. I went to the store to buy bread because on the Sabbath everything is closed and you have to buy stuff from the Arabs, which I don't like to do because they use my money to fight against the IDF. Anyway. I picked out the bread and I went to buy it, but I had a lot of coins and I wanted to do exact change because I wanted to use them up. So I was counting coins and the lady behind the counter looks at me and says, "You realize how much time you're wasting?" Kusemek!!! I was angry. So I gave her back the damn bread and I kept my money and now I have no bread. But it was worth it, I think. I will have to wait until Sunday, but at least I did the right thing. Americans: are you really trying to get the government to pay for health care right now? I thought your economy was not so good! |
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