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 |  Where am I going, and why am I in this handbasket? |
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Fair Warning: I've upped the rating on this blog. It is now set at GC. |
| How is your US geography? We've been studying states all evening to prepare my daughter for a US states test tomorrow. I love geography, so once she had it down, I added another element of challenge by showing her this site. http://www.sheppardsoftware.com/states_experiment_drag-drop_Intermed_State15s_50... I really want to get a 100%, but so far the best I've done is a 98%. Trying to place Kansas or Colorado on a completely blank map is killer.  Yep, another fine way to waste my time. Okay, I'm back . . . Wow! I got my 100% so now the spell is broken. I suppose I should update you all. They announced the cuts at Hubby's work today and he was once again spared. So that is good news, but a tough time for Tony. It is tough watching coworkers getting cut. |
| I don't really have a direction in mind for today, so I'll just start typing and we'll see where this leads. In her blog yesterday, Scarlett   wrote about "going off on one." I've not used that term, but it so aptly describes something I love to do. My latest "one" is my idea for a new band . . . Joe-six-pack and the Mavericks. I think that would be a great name for a band. Tony and I have been having fun with the idea. Their first album could be "Lipstick on a Pig," and would feature songs like "The Red State Blues," "If You Think I'm Old, You Should Meet My Mom", "Loaded for Moose" and "Why does Anderson Cooper hate me?" Catchy right? I know, I know . . . no one cares anymore. The election is over and everyone is moving on. So moving on . . . Tony's place of employment is looking at another round of lay offs this week. They are hemorrhaging revenue and are looking for a way to slow the bleed. Looks like they are trying to cut 100 jobs. I'd be more worried if I thought worrying about it would do any good. It won't, so why bother. I'm not sure what to make of our new Administrative Assistant at work. She seems efficient and friendly, but their is something about her that bugs me. I think it's that I already know way too much about her. I'm not comfortable with high levels of self disclosure. I realize that seems ridiculous considering I'm blogging my thoughts right here as I am thinking them, but somehow this woman offends my sense of boundaries. The temp she is replacing was a lovely woman who I was very fond off. I'd worked with her for 8 months. I think she was married, I'm pretty sure she had at least one kid, and she cared who won American Idol. And really, that was enough for me to know. I think I should know someone for at least a year before I found out that her brother never sees his kids because the ex-wife is a complete bitch and he had to move away to get his life together. Hell, normally I want to know someone for a year before we get to the part about them having a brother.  It is official, I am an intolerant bitch. |
| So the husband believes my dream was some form of allegorical death dream . . . the journey ends . . . I find peace . . . I wait for my family to join me. I'm not quite sure I'm buying that one, and I don't think that the Great Lakes Vacation Bureau would appreciate the symbolism . . . Lake Michigan = Death! Whatever my subconscious was trying to tell me, today seemed to be a good day to tackle some electrical challenges in the basement. I turned off the main breaker to avoid any unpleasantness, and soon realized I should have gathered my tools first. That kind of organized, forward thinking initiative carried me through the day. I bought a LED head lamp for the occasion. I even remembered to take it off before answering the door to the UPS man. We have a mirror next to the front door for a reason.  I learned a couple things today. 1. The person who wired my basement was NOT a licensed electrician, and was probably being paid in beer, much of which would have been consumed on the job. 2. I don't have any junction boxes for attaching things like light fixtures and thermostats. I simply have wires sticking out of the walls with lights dangling off the ends. 3. The lights are arranged on a circuit modeled after a string of Christmas lights. If a single bulb is missing, all lights up the line go out. 4. If you find yourself in a home improvement store staring at electrical tape thinking "I wonder if I'll need that?" then you absolutely will. DAMN! 5. Duct tape is not an acceptable stand-in for electrical tape. So the only project I completed start to finish was replacing a dimmer switch and switch plate. I have bare live wires dangling from my ceiling, so although I've evaded death thus far, this project still has potential. I'm off work all day again tomorrow. |
| Some people don't remember their dreams, but I usually remember at least one dream per night. My dreams tend to be vivid and complex. They rarely ever feature the people I know and interact with on a daily basis. For the most part, I enjoy my dreams, and I often wake with a conscious desire to remember them - which is likely the reason that I do. Dreams are strange in that they can be so strong, focused and vivid, and at the same time hazy and ambiguous. Last night I had a dream. The early part of the dream is vague. I was on some type of a journey, and had been walking for a very long time. I had a companion with me, but I don't know who it was. It was time for me to make my way home, and I was following a path that I was quite confident would lead me to a road that I could follow home. I followed the path through scrubby trees that gave way to tall dry grass. The trail narrowed into a faint line of rich bare earth winding through the beige grass. Was I still on the right path? I had been certain I was, but the path was becoming less and less distinct. It was the kind of path that leads away from, rather than towards. Around a bend a vast lake came into view - and somehow I knew it was Lake Michigan. It spread across the horizon, dark and still under the heavy gray sky. The fading path led to a narrow beach of white pebbles. The smell of the moist air, the sound of water lapping against stone, and the low graceful flight of the heron skimming over the glassy surface of Lake Michigan . . . it was all so real. I felt, not peace, but the promise of peace. I was at the end of my path, and it had not led me home. Further up the beach, there was a faint trail, like a part combed through the sweeping grass. It appeared to follow the shoreline of the lake. Maybe if I followed it, I might find a stretch of sandy beach, but I wouldn't find the road. The only way to get home would be to retrace my steps, and that was not an option. I had come too far. I turned to my companion, "We're here." The promise of peace was realized in the simple words, but my companion remained skeptical. "What do you mean? What about home? Shouldn't you be getting home soon? It is getting late." "I can't get there from here. I'm at the end of the path. Maybe my family will join us. It's lovely here, and now that I know where this is, I think they could find the way. Crunching onto the rocks, I seated myself on an old stump, and watched the shadows lengthening toward violet dusk in quiet contentment. |
| The positives: 1. Flexibility - I don't punch a clock, and my boss takes it on faith that I put in my time, and so he doesn't really give a shit if I'm 15 late in the morning, or run over on my lunch. 2. Close to home - I have a 2 mile commute. 3. Lots of Vacation, holiday, and sick time. - I have a four day weekend coming up. I have off the 11th for Veteran's Day, so I decided to take Monday as well. I'm only allowed to carry over three weeks vacation from one year to the next, and that means I have 10 days I have to use by December 31. 4. The finally finished repairing the wall from where Emma drove her car into the building 5 years ago. - Turns out the building is made of Styrofoam. 5. Health insurance - Sure, I've got good health insurance, but the premium gets jacked up every year. I have to pay a percentage of the premium, but it is a relatively small amount for family coverage. The problem is that every year, my annual raise is negated by the increase in premiums. Have you seen all the ads lately about health insurance lately. Well, my son has. The other day he asked "Do you know what I want to be when I grow up?" "I don't know. Tell me what you want to be." "Well . . . I don't know either, but I hope I'll have good health insurance." When did we go from wanting good jobs with health insurance to settling for any job with good health insurance? Today was an uninspiring day at work. The state has a 500 million dollar short fall that they intend to find in the Department of Public Welfare's budget. It could be worse. Drug and Alcohol took the hardest hit, as usual, since the public sentiment is that they are far less deserving of assistance than the aged, mentally ill, and developmentally disabled. Never mind that most of the children in foster care in this county are there because of parental drug use or alcohol abuse. All the systems intertwine and everyone in human services will be taking a hit. More positives: 6. The people I work with have a sense of humor. 7. Most of the people I work with are deeply committed to the people we serve. Sometimes it can be hard to tell because when a client dies, everyone immediately asks what is going to happen to their funding in hopes that they might score some money to buy supports for Joe-really-needs-a-life-coach. 8. When the IT dept started blocking frequently abused websites, they didn't target Writing.Com. 9. The new Administrative Assistant feels under utilized so I've been encouraged to dump a lot of my work on to her which will free up a lot of time to work on my NaNo novel, or write silly limericks. 10. My job has evolved into a very good fit for my strengths and interests, and as a result, I feel confident and valued. Just wanted to end on a more positive note there. Did I mention that I've got a four day weekend ahead of me? |
| It is a new marking period at school and that means Katie has rotated to the next set of "specials." Unfortunately, no one communicated with the new teacher, who seated the children alphabetically putting Kate right next to the boy who threatened to rape her. Also, my efforts to ensure the incident was properly documented seem to be hitting a brick wall. When Katie gave a statement to the Principal, she thought she was done. Furthermore, he instructed her not to discuss the matter with anyone except for her teachers. I called the Principal this morning to ask for follow up. I want an investigation, documentation, witness statements etc. I learned the following: 1. They were leaving it up to Kate to write out another written complaint, but they had failed to tell her that they needed her to do this. 2. They haven't talked to any witnesses, but told me that Katie should encourage them to come forward. Huh? Why is the responsibility being shifted back on to her? How can they expect her to ask witnesses to come forward when they asked her not to discuss the matter with her peers? 3. They are aware this incident is part of a pattern of behavior for the other student. He has a reputation, if not an actual record. The Principal informed me however that this is the first incident they've had at the Jr. High (the kids moved up from the middle school to Jr. High at the start of the school year) and that they can't do anything about what has happened in the past, but can only deal with the current issue. In other words, they are treating this as a first offense when it absolutely is not. The Principal assured me that they are just as interested as documenting the incident as I am because if something develops to the level of police involvement, or they have to petition juvenile court, they want clear documentation. I informed the Principal that they needed to gather witness statements, document everything, and provide me with copies, or it WOULD be a police matter because I would call them in to complete the investigation, and I would call the Superintendent to inform him of my dissatisfaction with the current protocol. I told him that I do incident management for a living (among other things) and documentation and timeliness are essential to the process. He did not disagree, but he made it a point to tell me that he'd enjoyed his talk with my husband who was both reasonable and open-minded. ASSHOLES! |
| My sister-in-law sent me this link today http://voices.washingtonpost.com/postpartisan/2008/11/tell-the-campaign-in-a-lim... So that's my agenda for the evening. I'll try to stop back later. I'm back, but I don't think the Washington Post will go for any of the questionable limericks I scribbled while watching the drama unfold . . . We'll make history with this election as voter's chose a new direction. It's been so protracted I fear I'm distracted by Anderson Cooper's erection. We have had our fill of politics with its Joe-six-packs and mavericks Voters turned out en masse to save the middle class like moose to proverbial salt licks. Who doesn't love political gaffes? In stressful times we all need some laughs, but no matter who wins, we're assured a few grins, when the Veep speaks on his own behalf. |
| My daughter has outgrown the trick-or-treat thing, and I’m a little sad about it. She’s growing up, and that is both positive and inevitable . . . and a little sad. Katie will be going out tonight with her boyfriend and his parents. They are going to a Blue Öyster Cult concert. Tony and I will take the boy-child out trick-or-treating. He is very proud of his alien cyborg costume. It comes with a hooded cloak, and every day for the past two weeks, he’s come home from school and put on the cloak. So, now he looks like an alien cyborg who’s been rolling around on the floor with a golden retriever. Fortunately, It'll be dark! Tonight will mark the start of NaNo. I have the opening line of the book planned out in my head, and some hazy ideas about plot and premise, but my main character doesn’t have a name yet, let alone a personality. My midnight writing session might end up being very short! |
I’m hesitant to use an analogy of immunization to discuss political ideology because immunization has become such a hot-button for some. That said, it is the best analogy I have. In her entry "Invalid Entry"  and the follow up entry "Invalid Entry" Mavis Moog  implies that conservatives are either unscrupulous profit-seekers, or perhaps gullible to conservative double-speak. While I agree with Mavis Moog on many political points, and have a great respect for her informed opinions, I object to this generalized characterization. I tried to use an immunization analogy in my comment to her, but failed to fully develop the idea. I’m still not sure the idea is fully developed, but it has caught my interest and in an effort to organize my thinking, I’m going to explore the analogy here.As I commented to Mavis Moog , my father was a virologist. In truth, he was many things over the course of his years. He was a soldier, a veterinarian, a food inspector, and ultimately a virologist working for a major vaccine manufacturer. He worked in quality assurance and as part of his job, he received all of the “adverse reaction” reports related to the vaccines. He was a strong believer in doing what was right and often clashed with the marketing people. In his view, people should always come before profit.When I became a mother, and was faced with the gauntlet of childhood vaccinations, some of which were new, relatively unproven, and optional, I often asked my father his opinion. His views on vaccination mirrored his views on many things in life. His views went something like this . . . If you look at each child individually, the risk of vaccinating is always greater than the risk of not vaccinating IF you assume that child will be living amongst a fully vaccinated population. However, if you look at it from the level of public interest, the risk of vaccination is very small compared to the risk of not vaccinating. In this case, the best interests of the individual must not come before the common good. The risk of adverse reactions is necessary to controlling and potentially eradicating preventable diseases. My father identified himself as a conservative. He felt the government had an obligation to spend tax dollars with prudence and accountability. He did not mind that his taxes supported a variety of social safety nets, but he did have a problem with poorly organized programs that created a disincentive to work. He also objected to paying taxes to support unproductive government bureaucracy. I don’t think greed was a big motivator for my father, nor do I think he was gullible. He was a practical person. Going back to the vaccine analogy, there are some people who cannot be vaccinated because they are either allergic to a component of the vaccine, or because they have a compromised immune system. The fact that some people cannot be vaccinated makes it all the more critical that the rest of the population IS vaccinated. It insulates those individuals from the risk. The danger is that others will opt out of vaccines because of the associated risk. They might feel safe in doing so because of the same insulation from risk, but that insulation thins considerably as vaccination rates drop. Bringing the vaccine analogy back around to political ideology, there must be personal responsibility. Those that can, MUST, in order to insulate those that can’t from the consequences of vulnerability. It applies to all areas of personal responsibilty. Those that can work, should work, and by doing so we can build in a layer of protection for those who are disabled and can not work. These were the beliefs my father held until the day he died. He was a conservative man, but at the core was a basic philosophy about the way society should work that is not entirely at odds with <gasp> Socialism. We take words like liberal and conservative, and front-load them with judgments. Like all words, they are able to mean different things to different people, and a true exchange of ideas is only possible after we move beyond the labels and arrive at some shared meanings. That said, I believe that the major US political parties are far too similar. The greed for power and profit plagues both camps, and self interest is routinely put ahead of the public interests. I also believe that until we resolve the health care issues around cost and access, most of us will continue to be wage slaves. Many of the people I know work either for the government or for non-profits. We are not being oppressed by an employer trying to make the maximum profit off the sweat of our brow. We are instead oppressed by an employer trying to contain costs while feeding a growing portion of our “compensation” to the ever hungry insurance monster lurking in the shadows. Every year the insurance companies stroll in clicking their tongues in mock sympathy, “You’re average usage has gone way up. We’ve had to cover three labor and deliveries in one year alone, and one of those babies was in a NICU for a week. With those types of costs, we don’t have any choice but to raise your premiums.” And so we shop for a new provider, but provider networks are thinner than John McCain’s hair in these parts, and any attempt to cut costs will result in loss of access which cuts into early diagnosis and prevention and leads to higher cost corrective treatment thus causing the cost of usage to rise and the premiums to increase. In my own world, all insurance companies would be non-profit organizations, with any would-be-profits reinvested into the health care infrastructure. People should come before profits. Now, did anyone follow that? Is anyone still here? |
| Bonnie read over the epitaph entries from last Friday. Her response . . . “I was hoping for something more limericky.” Ah yes, because I hear epitaph and immediately think limerick.  Whatever. Limericks are more my speed anyway. So she tells me I need to get this done today because she needs time for the paint to dry on the tombstones before Friday. I do best when I have tight deadlines, so I set aside all my job related stuff and carved a half hour out of my day to draft something limericky for Bonnie. According to Kay’s Big Picture Book of Poetic Forms adding a ‘Y’ to the end of any form name gives the poet license to disregard at least half of the form rules. Moreover, it is entirely up to the writer which rules are kept, and which are disregarded. You should see me whip up something sonnety. So this is what I came up with: When the books went from black to red, it was time to lie down and play dead. Admitting they were defeated wise execs. soon retreated with an infusion of cash from the Feds.  When investment banking took a hit, all of our holdings turned to shit. Financing sub-prime Seemed like a good idea at the time, and everyone one else was doing it. Well, it was enough to amuse Bonnie, and that was my aim anyway. Now I need to start seriously ramping up for NaNo. I haven’t given it nearly enough thought. When the clock strikes 12 AM on Halloween Night, I’m going to be staring at a blank screen wondering what the main character’s name is. Crap. I guess it is a good that I do my best work on deadlines. |
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