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For the avoidance of doubt... Yes... I definitely have an opinion... |
 Welcome to my Blog!! Having an opinion is better than not having a thought of your own. I have many of both.... Pull up a pew and grab a hot, steaming mug of your choice. |
| Prompt: Summer - what do you think about the summer season, and/or how would you personify summer in a story or poem? Summer is…. days at the beach or relaxing by the pool, sun-kissed skin and coconut smelling sunscreen, no school and hanging with my friends, and eating ice cream until my brain freezes. I think of my younger years when I was innocent, carefree, with less responsibilities - when I felt I could take on the world. That is who summer is to me – young, free, full of warmth and energy, and not tainted by the storms of Autumn (which FYI I love also). *** I have lived in two hemispheres. The Northern Hemisphere from birth until I was around 38ish... and the last 5 in Australia. For those who live under a rock – or have never considered it – the seasons are flipped. This means that summer is not summer, or at least not when my brain thinks summer should be. It completely screws with my mind… I associated Christmas with the cold. Wrapping up warm, with a hot chocolate and roasted chestnuts… not flip-flops (I refuse to use the other word), “boardie”, and a Christmas Day trip to the beach. It is just not right!!! Where is the snowman competition, the hibernation, the Christmas jumpers…. No where to be seen, that is where!!!! And let us not discuss Christmas dinner – because cooking a full Christmas roast with all the trimmings when it is hot enough to cook an egg on the driveway is not fun, but equally having a salad is just not ok!!! I have contemplated getting a snow machine (or several) such to satisfy my inner Elsa needs. At the moment I just hang wooden snowflakes everywhere and crank up the A/C. Another issue is Halloween, which should be spooky – but this is hard to do when it does not get dark until 21:00. Although I can do summerween – so it is not all bad. It is just funny having a BBQ at the Halloween party in 30 degrees (C not F) and your face paint melting off. The mental switch takes a lot of getting used to. I do not think I am there yet – not sure I ever will be. |
| Prompt: Laughter. "There's great value in being able to step back and laugh at yourself, at life, and at attitudes. Laughter helps you put everything into perspective." Jim Henson *** In the UK we have a saying "Today's news is tomorrow's fish and chip wrapper." It harks back to the days when we wanted our fish and chips coated in ink as well as salt and vinegar (I'm joking the newspaper was the outside wrapper, not the internal one). The premise is that the things that seem important to us today won't be tomorrow, or at least in the future. I suppose it is the equivalent to today's "This too shall pass". That bad day you're having - it will pass - there will be a better one. The argument with your spouse - it will pass - you'll probably have many more (you might even win one!). Even the grief we feel - in time even that will lessen and pass. As a whole, the human race takes itself far too seriously. I mean honestly, the more you look at us as a species, the more you realise how utterly ridiculous we are. And yet, many of us are incapable of finding the funny side in most situations - especially the ones where we are front and centre - with the spotlight homed in on us. People who laugh at themselves are happier people. That might seem obvious... We all make mistakes. We all embarrass ourselves at some point. I make a fool of myself on a daily basis if I haven't had my tea to wake my brain up. We can't be perfect all the time because perfect really doesn't exist. It's a stupid human construct that serves no purpose other than to make us feel bad about our lives and ourselves. It's a horrible feeling to believe/have people laugh AT us. Yet it's also a rite of passage. A lesson that needs to be learnt, because it will happen regardless. If we laugh at our follies, people usually laugh with us (which feels completely different). And if it is at us, their gaze will move on quickly enough. While something may feel super important at the time it's happening, it rarely makes CliffsNotes in our lives. At most, we may reminisce over it with our friends and family while sipping a beer, glass of wine, or large fruit cocktails with one of those little umbrellas. "Remember when you..." Time allows us to laugh at ourselves, because time allows us to have perspective. It forces us to have perspective. We move on, our lives change, our priorities shift. The sooner we are able to laugh at a situation, the quicker we can move on... to the next embarrassing situation, because you know it's coming. I have also realised (sadly only once I entered my 30s and stopped caring about the opinions of others so much) that if I accept that I might make a fool out of myself and laugh at it, I actually end up having so much fun. And I often get to try something new too. The fear of being laughed at often stops us trying stuff out - which is a shame. |
| Prompt: Have fun with these nine words: junket, exhibition, care, introduce, sketch, door. flock, wreck and discrimination. A press junket can be viewed as an exhibition of the very worst of humanity. Where people flock with little care for actual journalism and instead squawk repetitive and mundane questions at a speaker(s) in an often-rehearsed fashion. It’s a poor man’s comedy sketch. A parody of reality. The live-action wreck of society’s demise in slow-motion. It does little to introduce us (the public) with the facts – the door is firmly closed in that regard – the public discrimination of the truth, videoed for posterity!  |
| Prompt: Writer Francois-Marie Arouet, who was better known as Voltaire was imprisoned on May 16th in 1717 for his outspoken opinions. "Doubt is an uncomfortable condition, but certainty is a ridiculous one." There are very few things in this world we can be certain about and many people confuse Fact with Opinion and Belief – which is very ridiculous. To doubt is a very strong human trait. It is what has kept us alive. We would not have evolved, or continue to evolve as a species without it. Doubting something makes us curious, make us cautious, makes us question our surroundings and what we know of the world. And often our internal self / subconscious tells us when we should be doubting something – it’s that sixth sense, that prickle up your neck to say something isn’t quite right. Even our scientific discoveries carry with them an element of doubt in order to perfect or ensure safety. Very few things should ever be taken at face value. "Every man is guilty of all the good he did not do." Evil prevails when good men do nothing – very strong and powerful words, which are absolutely true. We let society, our communities, and ourselves down when we do not stand up to be counted, when we do not hold other accountable for their actions, when we say – “It’s nothing to do with me” or “It’s not my problem”. Because there is a good chance than someday it will be. It will be our problem or our kids and grandkids problems. Simon and Garfunkel wrote a song about it – the Sound of Silence – which was superbly covered by Disturbed. "Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers." Questions very often tell us more about a person that the statements they make. I am often left underwhelmed whenever I listen to anyone in leadership – company or government - speaks. The majority of the time it is rehearsed, scripted responses, which do not feel genuine. I often play buzz word bingo – how many one liners can I spot in the speech. Are we “pivoting” and “thinking outside the box”? Are we “kicking the tires?” …. Bleh… It’s cliché and makes my eyes roll. I much prefer the questions and answers sessions, because they are honest. Because you can tell if someone is truly passionate and knows what they are talking about. It’s harder to lie on the fly. Easier to be caught out. And people who ask questions rather than just talk at you are really asking to hear your thoughts, and opinions. It’s what I also keep my eye out for in interviews – who has done the research. "Optimism is the madness of insisting that all is well when we are miserable" Eternal optimism is madness – but it can also be hope. Especially when we are miserable. It can be the white lie we tell ourselves to keep going. To not give up. |
| Prompt: "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." Plato *** There is very little point in being mean to someone – ever. It does nothing other than potentially upset or hurt that person or make their day worse. It rarely makes you feel better. And if it does, it is usually only a temporary gratification – it never lasts. It says more about you than them. We are not the central character in everyone's story, only our own. We do not know what someone is dealing with. Even when our friends and family confide in us there will be things we don’t know, fully appreciate, or understand. My husband occasionally gets frustrated when I refuse to take the bin out at night. Or go to the shops. Generally, when the sun goes down, I am not leaving my house. I get anxiety about it. Heart palpitations. I’m running through the very elaborate plan in my head to get to the bins, to the curb, and back to the house safely - in one piece. My overactive imagination in is overdrive with what could be lurking in the dark – and how to defend myself. There are scenarios… many scenarios… My husband knows why. He’s fully aware of my history. We’ve talked about it many times because it impacts many different areas of my life. But even still, there are times when he doesn’t fully grasp it, or it’s not at the front of his mind (it’s like he forgets until he is reminded). He knows why but doesn’t feel it – and honestly why would he. But even on a base level, we don’t know what is happening in someone’s life. We don’t know if that mother who looks dishevelled dropping the kids off at the school gate has been up all night with a sick child. And even if she wasn’t how does it affect us in any way. The colleague who isn’t pulling their weight on a project or doesn’t seem as switched on as usual – maybe their parent is ill or they had a disagreement with their spouse, or the gas bill has come in and they are wondering how the hell they are going to make it to pay day – you know the everyday trials and tribulations adults go through at some point. Maybe the person who was a little short/rude to you – is still grieving or is having a tougher day than normal. And even if they are just being an arsehole – you being one back isn’t going to make the situation better – it is more likely to make things worse. I’m not saying we should be kind at any cost. We need to have boundaries to protect ourselves and others. There are times that being kind can and has put individuals in danger. There is a difference in being kind and being someone’s metaphorical punching bag, just like there is a difference between being rude and just being the bigger person and walking away. There are situations where just “not being rude” is the right answer. We are entitled to ask if that colleague is okay to support the project still, or if they need help with it, or an extension? It is okay to walk away from a situation instead of blindly offering help. Because these things have an impact on us and other people. We are not entitled to know the details of why they are struggling. But we also can’t offer assistance unless we know it is needed or wanted. And most people struggle to ask for help. It’s a balance. In general, being kind costs very little. It does no real harm. Treating people with compassion should be normal behaviour, and yet it seems to be a trait we are losing at a staggering pace, particularly when people do not fit into the predefined pigeon-holes society seems obsessed with creating. So, I agree with Plato in that “everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle”, but I also believe that sometimes it is better to walk away than to try and be kind. |
| Prompt: All the world is made of faith, trust and Pixie dust. **** I’m not sure if the world is made of faith, trust and Pixie dust, but I think humanity is built on it. Most people believe or have faith in something - we just don’t all agree on what (which seems to be an issue for some people). I think faith goes further than just religion – which I am not a huge fan of. I think the world turns on our faith (and trust) in each other. All of our connections are driven by our faith and trust in the people in our lives. It’s incredibly fragile and delicate, but also surprisingly resilient – like a spider’s web. We spend our lives creating a network of people around us, which constantly needs to be nurtured, fixed, or rebuild depending on the ebb and flow of life – it’s our own, personal world. Evolving and changing – like us. We are like busy little spiders, constantly spinning – no wonder I am tired all the time. What we create can be beautiful if we catch it in the right light and take the time to appreciate it – usually in those quiet moments, just after dawn, after the dark and the cold. We see the friendships and relationships glistening like diamonds – a reminder of how important they are to us - or should be. There are moments in my life I know I wouldn’t have survived if it had not been for those relationships. When I was at my lowest, I put my faith and trust in them, without truly realising I was doing so, or how vulnerable I was. I was able to lean on them. They gave me their strength when I had none of my own – willingly, gladly, without question – if that isn’t pixie dust, I don’t know what is. It’s those moments that reaffirm my faith in humanity. The world needs its pixie dust. |
| Prompt: What drains your energy in your life? And in what ways can you stay grounded in stressful situations? **** People – people drain my energy on a daily basis. I am actually a very good conversationalist (or can be if I decide to be social). I can be witty and charming. The life and soul of the party. Make everyone feel wonderful about themselves. Heard. Validated. But then I must retire to a dark room and hide from any form of human interaction. Socialising drains my battery. And my patience – which isn’t very high to begin with. It takes a lot of energy, particularly with people I don’t know or like. My dilemma is that my face has subtitles and a voiceover. There is no misinterpreting the message once the battery is at zero – it is written in every eye twitch and raised eyebrow. I often wonder if today is going to be the day I get fired after group calls at work – or if anyone is concerned about my eyes rolling… out of my head… when we have to listen to another over inflated, ego who is too preoccupied with self-importance. I do not hide my emotions or thoughts well. I have learnt to bite my tongue – it’s hard, because the sarcastic side of me has witty comebacks locked and loaded 99% of the time. Yes, I am one of those people. The ones that deal with stress with British sarcasm and a dry, dark and twisted sense of humour (usually combined with tea, chocolate, or both). It’s an acquired taste (the attitude not the hot beverage or sweet treat). I also cannot think of anything worse than wasting my time with people whose company I do not enjoy. I am too old for that. I have comfy PJs and slippers to be in. My level of tolerance - or selfishness - in the matter has got more severe with each passing year. And it is something I fully embrace. |
| Prompt: “In May, anything seemed possible. If only I could learn to harness time itself. To make every month like May! Or, perhaps, to live backward in time, so that whenever the end of the month arrived, I could turn May right around and live it all over again.” ― T.A. Barron **** There are never enough hours in the day. The ability to harness time itself would seem to be a gift on the surface, although I wonder if it would just lead to being more burnt out as we inevitably try to squeeze more into our days. Is that what achievement is? Doing more, or as much as you can? In the Northern Hemisphere May is when Spring is in full swing – Summer just around the corner. The days are getting longer and warmer. There is a sense of optimism that comes with that. We’ve just come out of “hibernation” and the cold barren wasteland of winter. Everything is possible. Everything is full of life again. In terms of the seasons of our life. May may represent young adulthood. When we are starting to find ourselves. There is still so much life yet to live and the pathways are not yet set in stone. It’s an exciting time when we can experiment and make mistakes. It was probably my favourite time – mid to late twenties – it’s when I met my husband. It’s when I started to careless about other people’s opinions too. We often have less commitments and are only responsible for ourselves. To be able to relive that time over and over, to perfect the life we want, is an enticing idea. Maybe that is what T.A. Barron means? I now live in Australia, so I’m about to enter those darker, moodier months (which I love – as I am also dark and moody). I am entering the Autumn of my life. Full of colour but starting to creak at the seams. I’m originally (NH) an autumn baby… so I tend to lean towards the storms, comfortable with weathering them. |
| Prompt: Mothers Did you ever believe that mothers really had eyes in the backs of their heads? And what about mothers in spirit? Was there anyone in your family or among friends who acted as a spiritual mother to you or to someone else that you know of? **** When I was very young, I was always amazed at how my mother seemed to know EVERYTHING. There was very little I could hide from her. I did try... As I grew up, I realised it was never just her - there was a network of mothers, aunts, best friends, and nosey neighbours twittering like birds over who's child had done what. It made us kids get creative. Which I know was not what they were hoping for. As a young adult, I realised just how much she knew and let me get away with. Letting me think I had gotten away with something or managed to pull the wool over her eyes. There was no wool. She had 20/20 vision. I'm not sure how she decided what stuff to let go of, and which to take me to task over - it was possibly a safety issue. Or more likely which stuff would reflect the worst in her. As a mother of two I now have a new perspective on it, because my son will die on a hill over something that I KNOW he did. On times he is so convincing - it is scary. Others, I wonder if he even engaged his brain to come up with that excuse. I made the mistake of once flippantly saying, "If you are going to lie to me, at least make it believable." He took this to heart. Feeback rather than a reprimand. I knew would regret it as soon as I said it. It must be a rite of passage. Or payback... Possibly both. As kids we forget that our parents were once our age. And kids are kids no what the generation. Same drama, different decades. |
| Prompt: Eight climbers die on Mount Everest during a storm on May 10, 1996. It was the worst loss of life ever on the mountain on a single day. Author Jon Krakauer, who himself attempted to climb the peak that year, wrote a best-selling book about the incident, Into Thin Air, which was published in 1997. Every year despite the book about the deaths that occur each year climbing people pay thousands of dollars to climb Mt. Everest. If you had the money would you try or not? What do you think the fascination is with climbing? **** I wouldn't climb Mount Everest even if I was paid $,$$$,$$$ to. I know my limitation. I either wouldn't make the submit or I'd never make it back - at least with all my toes. I have no interest in proving myself to a mountain. The mountain wins!! It's the same with free diving. Not for me. I've had my adrenaline - make me feel alive - moments in my late teens and earlier twenty with bungee jumping and skydiving. My body is not the same. It no longer bounces back. It takes longer to recover. I'd much prefer to go on adventures from the comfort of my sofa, in my PJs, with a hot cup of tea in hand. "Everest is littered with the bodies of fit, ambitious people - stay safe, stay lazy..." As for others and their fascination, I can only think it is for the sense of achievement. Of completing something that so few human beings get to do. To be in that select group. And good for them. No one should or can take that away from them. But, I'd still rather a mug of hot chocolate and a documentary on the climb. |
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