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Random babblings of a confused miniature writer |
| A blog/journal just to babble/dabble in to try to keep my friends up to date on my pitiful existence. |
| So far, nothing. Since my first eye appointment, I have been having serious trouble with my eye itching, burning, and gluing themselves shut. I went to another eye doctor that the first one referred me to find out that what I was referred for was basically nothing. The irritation I've been having is dry eye. I guess the excessive drainage is all in my head. I am having a hard time seeing and all I want to do is scream. I don't care for my new glasses; the lens get dirty quickly and a lot. now to my mouth. I have a complete set of dentures that I don't wear because they don't stay in and they hurt my mouth. I think I gave up on using them a year ago. My mouth and tongue hurt enough without them. Went to the dentist today to find out that she wants me to stop all the things that are helping because there is nothing wrong. I do have a rash around the outside of my mouth that she is prescribing Nystatin cream for. Tis is also the cream that my other doctors I see keep me in well stock of for my rash in various unmentionable places. She wants me to come back in a year. My whole-body hurts and it is excruciating to move. With my mouth in such pain eating is an adventure in pure torture. All I want to do is sleep. My chest feels like there is boulder settingI'll on it and it is hard to breathe. |
| Had a blood transfusion on Monday. Didn't help anything. Went out with my peer support on Wednesday. Was okay. Looked at wigs that cost way too much. Went to the restaurant and had milk shakes and cheese sticks. Had a semi-good conversation. Have another Chemo session next Thursday. I have no life and can't get myself to do anything that would help me; like locating my drawing supplies or blank writing tools. I should clean and organize my room again. I shouldn't be spending so much time laying on the recliner in the living room watching TV (even if T is loving it). I can't write any more.... I can't see..... |
| Well I'm getting new, much stronger glasses in three weeks. Feels good to think I just might be able to see. Got my walker exchanged. Cute little red one with a seat and a bag. I'll use it when I got a lot of walking to do. I know I need to quit beating myself up about not writing. I have the shakes so bad most of the time I can barely type let alone put pen to paper. Believe it or not what I have been thinking about doing is drawing and painting. I know I am not going to be pleased with the end product (I am no artist) but at least I can say I attempted something. Just got the inkling to write a Children's Book about mice. My muse kicked in to writing something about the first day of school. Maybe I'll see about scratching some notes on it later. Canceled out seeing Cathy anymore. I just wasn't accomplishing anything. Besides with Ds paranoia following me around in my head I don't have much to talk about without alarms going off. I wish I didn't have to see Jacob and could just see Laura and Amy but I think Laura and Jacob are a package deal. I adore Laura too much to let her go. Been putting all my money into the house this month. Haven't really bought a thing for myself. I don't care. Just wish T would stop asking me where all my money went. Got a summons to do jury duty. Took it to Jacob and he and Oncology are getting me out of it. I'd never make it past the selection process anyhow. My views are too radical. |
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