What a delightful poem. A lovely expression of friendship and learning, and I do feel that a child would enjoy reading this. One small quibble, the lines 'Gertie the giant goldfish bubbled, "what are you trying to do?"
And Gary Galah's screeched 'Boo Boo Boo" ' are a bit too long and break up the flow spomewhat. Could I suggest either 'Gertie Goldfish...' or 'Gertie the goldfish...', then lose the 'And' on the next line, so:
Gertie goldfish bubbled, "what are you trying to do?"
Gary Galah's screeched "Boo Boo Boo"
Cleverly and succinctly expressed. Strong use of repeated rhyme, but not straying from your message to achieve this. Observe discretion, to avoid censorship obsession, though I don't feel you need this lesson. A powerful opening shot, now let's see what else you got.
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