Okay, so far it's at a 3.5 but I must admit this looks like it's going to be a great story! I am really looking forward to reading more of it! I loved how you made sure to put the main character's name in the first sentence and your dialogue skills are simply amazing! You know to only use dialogue related to the plot of your story! Which I'm having trouble with so if you have any tips please don't hesitate to email me! ) There were some parts that were confusing such as when the freshman helped Aanchal with her fallen books when Aanchal dropping her books were not stated. I really like your ending though. It leaves me wanting to read more.
Two Questions:
Do you think you could review some of my work sometime? I would really appreciate the feedback.
WOW! This is truly very good. I was surprised to find that although I did not find much imagery in the way of seeing there was simply so much feeling in this poem that it was almost overweleming! My favorite part of this poem is the last two lines 'But I say only that I love you, like there is a tommorrow'. It's a great closing sentence that leaves the reader with wonder and an easy sense of what the poem was about.
Brillant Work!
P.S. Do you think that you could review some of my work sometime? I would really appreciate the feedback.
This is really very good! Especially if it's your first time. I can tell you have a lot of knowledge in writing. I would highly reccomend that you write more of these sonnets. You have a knack for it. The only paragraph that I would work on are the two lines 'Each line must be pure of thought' and 'Will he read what I have wrought' because they seem to have a different tune from the rest of your sonnet.
Overall you did a brillant job writing this. Could you review some of my work? I would really appreciate the feedback.
This is a really great intresting story! I was glued to my computer the entire time I was reading this. My favorite part(believe it or not) was the very first sentence. Who new one sentence could contain so much curiousity and excietment! You truly have a talent for writing exciting stories. Keep up the good work!
Enolse
P.S. Could you review some of my work some time? I would really appriciate the feedback
This is really good! I love the vocabulary and the flow of the words. I also like how this was easy to flow but still made you think along with the story.
great job!
wow! very interesting piece work. There is forshadowing, tricking the reader and entertainment. This is great! i thought that she was cheating on her husband! Great work! This is defenintly a five out of five! Do you think that you could review some of my work sometime? I would really appriciate the feedback.
Keep Writing!
Enolse
Very good work but with a little more effort I think that this could be even better! You definently poured your heart into this but it could use a little shaping. Your poem has a weak beginning, strong middle and semi strong end. Try making the poem a little sharper. I could defenintly see this as a timeless poem, however. You might have a classic on your hands.
Keep writing!
Enolse
I love the rhythm in this story! I also like that I wasen't bored while reading it. You kept me intuned throughout the entire poem! I can't wait to start reading this story! The only part I thought had weakened your poem had been the repitition(sorry I'm a really bad speller.) of paragraphs 10 and 5. usually repeating is much better at the ending of a poem but I still think that this poem is great! I look forward to reading more of your work in the future.
This is a very beautiful poem. I love how this poem is like a story but you still managed to keep a great pattern! Great Work! I also love how you sound so solid and secure and how you believe and FEEL everything that you are writing. Try as I might I can't find ANYTHING wrong with this poem. Sheer perfection! But just because I say it is perfect don't settle, push your limits as far as they can go. Who knows where they will take you!
Keep Writing!
Enolse
It's amazing how much you care about the people on writing.com. Other would probaley become greedy from all of the success you've achieved but not you! You want what's best for everybody! YAY! StoryMaster!
This is very interesting. You are a great writer because you believe in what you write. I think that you have a lot to offer the world and that the world would be a better place if they all thought like you do.
Keep Writing!
Enolse
This is a good beginning for a great story. The first paragraph wasn't every eye catching but as the story went on you really got me hooked I have to say! I think that this would have been a great horror story in my opinion. I believe you could have gone into more explaining about the characters a bit more and had some more dialogue but that's just my opinion.
With a little more work I think your story could really be something. You are a very talented writer and I look forward to reading more of your work.
Keep Writing!
Enolse
P.S. My brother and I started an interactive story about a dog named Buttons and two rabbits named Ceasar and Sal. We would LOVE it if you added a chapter in your free time.
What great story! This is the first time that I have read a story from a rock's point of view.Nice work!
I absolutely LOVED the beginning of this story because it was very funny and caught me off guard a little bit! This is a very unique story and I look forward to be reading more of your work.
Keep Writing!
Enolse
P.S. My little brother and I started an interactive story about a dog named Buttons and two rabbits named Ceasar and Sal. I would LOVE it if you added a chapter in your spare time.
OMG!! This was very funny! This story was COMPLETELY different the second time I read it! This was a VERY interesting and quite surprising. This story reminds me of that picture of a vase but when you look at it again you see two people. This is SO going in my favorites. This story is JUST like that picture of the vase/people! Amazing! Great Work!
Enolse
I love it! This poem is great considering you did it in one minute. My only suggestion, however, is to change your rating to ASR. My favorite part of this poem was the way you spelled doors. My little brother and I started an interactive story about a dog named Buttons and two rabbits named Ceasar and Sal. We would LOVE it if you added to our story.
Keep Writing!
Enolse
This poem is good...but is a little unclear for me, personally. I like the idea of this haiku and I think that it has a lot of potential and could be something great. I like the idea of the toad's immortality in this story and would LOVE to know how you got the idea for it.
Overall, great work!
A few adjustments and this could really be something!
Keep Writing!
Enolse
This is a very cute and wonderful story! You definitely have a future author here! This story is very warm and very inviting. It has a familiar yet new approach to children's writing. I like how this story is not boring and keeps the reader interested in what's going on. Overall, Great Work. My brother and I started an interactive story called The Adventures of Buttons and Friends. It's just a children's story about a dog named Buttons and two rabbits named Sal and Ceasar. Me and my brother would love it if you added a chapter!
Keep Writing!
Enolse
I LOVE this story! Your cat sounds very cute and silly! Just like my dog! This story has a funny quality to it and yet something all pet lovers can relate too. Great Work! I especially enjoyed how you put the dates in along with your story. Pets always seem to be like people don't they? Great Job on this story. My brother and I started an interactive story called The Adventures of Buttons and Friends. We would be thrilled if you added a chapter!
Enolse
Omigod!! THAT WAS SO FUNNY! I LOVED IT! I can't believe anyone would complain that you can't do anything on writing.com. You can do EVERTHING! This is ,like, the BEST website EVER! But I think it was very nice of you to write the "For the Record" Part. But it was still VERY funny.
Do you think that you could review some of my work? I would REALLY appreciate the feedback.
thanks for making writing.com,
Enolse
This is one static I can DEFINITELY relate to! I love your choice of words. You are a very good writer. You know how to get your point across and have the research to back it up. Great work!
Some Suggestions
To get more people to read your work try adding to interactive stories and adding more items to your portfolio. You are a great writer and the world needs to know that. Also try the 'noticing newbie's' section under Angel Resources which is located under site tools. Not only are you helping a newbie but you are also creating exposure as well!
Really great beginning to a story. I loved the part about George W. Bush! My only suggestion for you would be to explain the characters like Sherry a little bit more but you might be doing that in an upcoming chapter. Either way, I think you've got some great material here! I can't wait to read more!
Keep Writing!
This topic is very good. It sets the reader up for your next segment. This title really caught my eye. That is important if you want a lot of reviews I also found this story to be very funny and exciting. Overall, I look forward to be reading more of your work.
Some Suggestions
I have no suggestions for you. In my opinion this Intro is perfect! Great Work!
What a great idea for a poll! Not only did it show what other peoples' personality types are. You were also generous and considerate enough to insert a URL to the test! And like you had said I was VERY surprised at the accuracy of the test. So you were also helping people find distinguish our personality. As you probaley know this is very valuable information to any individual. Just imagine how this will help people! Overall, I LOVED this poll and I thank you, for making it.
Enolse
P.S. Could you please review some of my poems? I would really appreciate the feedback.
I like it! Very unique and different! Rover keeps Flake warm and safe in the winter even when Rover eventually forgets about Flake. And I love the picture of Rover and the Flake. It's very cute. This is probaley the most orginal poem I've seen. Great Job!
Enolse
P.S. My brother and I started an interactive story about a dog named Buttons and two rabbits named Ceasar and Sal and we would love it if you added a chapter! (You don't have to if you don't want to though.)
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) There were some parts that were confusing such as when the freshman helped Aanchal with her fallen books when Aanchal dropping her books were not stated. I really like your ending though. It leaves me wanting to read more. 
Sheer perfection!
Amy
Enolse