|An interesting storry, but you kind of left the audience hanging, you shouldn't mention a plan to murder someone if you don't plan to follow though. And why the main character wants to help a guy murder his wife. Or, why he would care if he was rude to a guy that was planning to muder his wife. I personally feel that it's an unrealistic reaction. You might also want to add what everybody looks like, are they tall,short,skinny etc. You should also consider giving your characters an age, for all the reader knows the story could be about a twelve year old.
You might also want to describe the bowling alley, like how it smells or what it looks like. And, at work why would they give hot dogs for free, and if they weren't tell us hiw much they cost.
Thank you for your time, Sincerely M.M