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Review of Cathy  
Review by bob county
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)

This is a fact of life that most people refuse to see.
People can be loving, but there are two faces to everyone.
I wish social studies could be included in our education.
We see so many examples of dysfunctional families.
There should be a psych exam to get married.

Review by bob county
Rated: E | (5.0)

This is an awesome resource.
I think you know the greatest hurdle to selling a story
is coming up with a money maker. This limits the storyline.
Most commercially successful films must have box office stars
and a happy ending. The process seems to create genre of
similar stories. Can there be a story about an anti hero?
Nietzche's superman would not be easy to watch or sell.
A story about the collapse of the world economy and the exploitation
of ruthless Darwinian socialism; isn't a family flick.
What if the bad guy wins?


+ ^
Review by bob county
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)

No one wants to offend, but there is a problem with this treatise.
I give you five stars for a well formulated argument. There is a blind
acceptance of dogmatic thinking that must be redressed. When I
enter the chat here I've noticed a dislike for skepticism. There are
atheists, but the moderators don't want talk about religion. This is the
Problem with all Religion. They don't want to talk about it, if you disagree
with their dogma.

Mohamed died in Medina and rode a white horse into Heaven.
Jesus died and ascended into Heaven on a cloud.

Which is true and how do you prove it?

The current view of religion is not an issue of knowledge of what the facts
are, but of faith of what is believed. The question should not be can you
believe it, but what evidence is there to support your assertion.

Recently, the Children of God announced that Jesus had returned in Brazil.
Well, are you skeptical? You can address your questions to their web site.
But, there faith will not be swayed.

I think your nieve if you think religious violence can be reasoned away.
People will believe anything and blow themselves up.

Good topic!

+ ^
Review by bob county
Rated: E | (5.0)

I love Fanny Flora Fuffingham. Did you know Einstein theory of the speed of light?
If you travel at the speed of light, you will shrink. Time will stand still. And if you
survive this dimensional shift, you might have genetic damage and sprout
fire fly wings. Could this be the source of Fairy lore?

Grind up some apricot pits and mix them in your wine with some
throne apple juice. I guarantee you will see Fairies.


+ ^
Review by bob county
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)

Is this a poem?

It is a series of declarative sentences.
But, I don't read any harmony.

The Koran writes:

Set forth the views of those who are teaching heresy
to show how absurd they are. You may urge all those with
whom you are connected to avoid such an abyss of madness
and of blasphemy against God.

I suppose this was the premises of your poem.
But, remember no one has a right to the use of another
person. That's slavery.

Good topic!

Review by bob county
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)

Have you heard about the 12th Emahn? This a nightmare savior,
who will unite all the Muslim nations against the west. You very true.
Assassinations can lead to war. As I read your story, I thought about
Abraham Lincoln. How could he have been so poorly guarded?
John Kennedy rode through the streets of Dallas in an open car.
Ronald Regan was shot at point blank range. Is there a pattern here?
Where is the security? I guess it could all be the work of mad men.

Good research!

Review of Assassins  
Review by bob county
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)

Well, this is a very uncivil story line.
I just rented a movie from The Red Box: The Justice League.
It's a Japanese cartoon. There is an episode with the Green Arrow.
A young Princess is targeted for assination. The Green Arrow uses his
archery to protect her. What's curious about this cartoon are the paparazzi
assins. They use cammera guns and pursue the princess at every media event.
Your assins seem very low tech: axes. That's very cumbersome.
I guess I needed more character developement. It kind of read like the crime page
in a news paper. Have you read any detective novels?
Sherlock Homes, "A murder is a crime against humanity. The fiend must be brought to justice."
(The Woman in Green)

Keep writing!
Review of Funny  
Review by bob county
Rated: E | (4.5)

Hmmm, I think this story needs more development.
What if you bought an ipod that turn out to have hypnotic
properties? The kids spent all their time playing with video games.
Maybe, you could have an out of body experience as you become
hand servant to the family. Get me a pickle tuna sandwich mom!
Here's a twist dad starts spending more time late at work.
you get jealous and beat him with the iron he bought you for X-mass.
Then, you run from the law with the kids in the back seat of your
SUV, but they don't care. They're playing with their ipods.


+ v
Review of My .45 sig  
Review by bob county
Rated: E | (5.0)

God use of space. The subject is off center and draws the viewer in.
There is no negative space. The picture is full of pattern. I like the spurs
in the corner. I'm guessing this is yours? I've often thought about visiting
Australia ... but, it looks ruff.

Westerns are fun to watch,
but I would want to live it.

Review by bob county
Rated: E | (4.5)

"Now politicians are the English tyrants and sixteen to eighteen years
old are the colonies." you wrote. I'm not sure what you want your government
to do? "We must be free to form our own bank." Benjamin Franklin.
The continental revolution was about freedom from the unfair trade and
interest rates of the Bank of England. In those days only the land owners
could vote. It sounds like you want a trust fund. That would be awesome.
I started at my first job at thirteen at a hardware store for $5.00 an hour.
Let's remember that nothing happens instantly. There are steps and
coping skills too.

Write to your representative.
You will receive a polite response.
That's their job; people pleasing.


Review of Blossoms Maligned  
Review by bob county
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)

Well, I feel like a clod critiquing this sad and beautifully told story.
Yes, each person has a story, a right to be respected. Sadly, it is cool
to be cruel. What, then, is the design for living? I'm a hermit.
I have heard the calling of love and the rasp of the death rattle.+
We are not the master race. We are the most destructive.
It is terrible that the birds can sign on honey sweet spring days as
mayhem slaughters innocence.
Your story is complete .. We know and care about the central characters.
"If I find a watch, there must be a watch maker." Rene Descartes.
But, what if it is soaked in blood?

Review by bob county
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)

Now this was fun. "Evil actions are only produced by ignorance,
and no one is ever bad of his own free will." Socrates. He asked
his students to question everything, "An unexamined life is not
worth living." Socrates said before he committed suicide by order
of the King.

I just find pro-lifers hilarious. You want every baby born, but you don't
want social services to pay for it. There were 2 billion people in the
world when I was born. Now there are 6 billion in 10 years there will
be 12 billion. How is that going to effect the ecology?

Oh well, God will fix it.

+ v
Review by bob county
Rated: ASR | (3.5)

Oy! Another poll. Ya-know in England political polls are not allowed?
Whichever, party controls the Parliament elects the Prime Minister.
That way there isn't as much lame ducking.
I wish you had just given your opinion and what evidence you have
to support your assertion. Do remember Desert Storm? Saddam's
Iraqi army invaded Kuwait . That country had a treaty with the United
States and this was an act of war. If President Bush senior wanted to
invade Iraq that was the time to do it. So why would his son blow up
the Twin Trade Towers to start a war with Iraq?

It just isn't logical.

Please, do not hesitate to present your own evidence.

Review of Jealousy  
Review by bob county
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)

Jealously is a natural response to the denial of a desired lover.
What you describe here is the unnatural desire of a lesbian.
What, then, is the message of your story?
Perhaps, there is only the recognition of despair.
Nature has no love for the weak. .
And much of human behavior is not useful to the ecosystem.
This is a curious dilemma. But, homosexuality and celibacy are
more eco-friendly, than, the natural act of reproduction which leads
to over population and rising pollution. ..
Danielle is a fitting name for your lead character.
The Prophet Daniel predicted the fall of civilization to the lust for war.

"Danielle felt her heat pause" you write. May I recommend stop instead of pause?
It has more dramatic punch. I like to also recommend you buy a copy of
HABITS OF THE HEART; individualism and commitment in American life by
Robert N. Bellah, ect. It deals with the isolation encouraged in a success driven
media. What is this culture we live in?

Good luck in all of your endeavors.

Review of Draconian  
Review by bob county
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)

Gadzooks! Hero and Leander again?
An ancient tome of love and loss.
Hero in Greek Mythology is a fearless warrior,
but he drowns swimming at night to his beloved Leander.
Of course, she throws herself into the sea and joins him in the abyss.
No greater love was this.

My only critique of this battle of Cathyn and Ariana is; what the hell is going on?
I think a short description of why this battle is happening would make more
dramatic impact.

Any Who,

It's bloody good fun.

+ v
Review by bob county
Rated: E | (4.5)

Who is this survey for? ... Satan?
Listen, in the beginning there was nothing.. then God spoke.
That's the Big Bang. I always marvel at religious folks. Here
is the question raised by Saint Augustine "Why do I love?"
Saint Augustine wrote about the "essence of things."
"Why do I see one thing as beautiful an another as ugly?"
he writes: The City God.
Born at Tagaste, northern Africa(354-430).
He believed in the Divine Grace of God that makes us all
artists and lovers.

Is God playing with us?

Doesn't every woman?

+ v
Review by bob county
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)

As I read this I thought of my own grandparents and their immigration to
the land of opportunity. I like the details of the house. So many lives have
passed through old homes. It's sad, but the days of living in one place for
generations is long gone. Most people can't afford it.

A perfect beginning to the New Year.

Review by bob county
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)

How did it come to this? The Santa we know is a Coco-Cola logo.
December 6 is Saint Nicholas of Bari's holiday. He is the patron
Saint of Russia and was born toward the end of the third century.
Saint Nicholas was an Archbishop of Myria in Lycia. He heard that
a man had fallen into poverty was intending to sell his daughters
into prostitution. The Saint went out by night and flung three gold
balls into the daughters window. Saint Nicholas is often depicted
in his red winter coat with his Bishops' Crotia(shepards staff).
He died 342. His relics are on display in Bari, Italy.

I remember the Christmas dad told me Santa was dead.
I got socks and a plaid shirt.

Review of Never Again  
Review by bob county
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)

The North American Bubble Bee is becoming extinct.
Insecticides are killing the hives. The domino effect is
devastating to agriculture and wild life. It's sad but true.
We don't want to believe this; we find it uncomfortable,
but people are toxic. We force ourselves to believe that
our own extinction is impossible. Somehow, science or
government will find an answer.
As I was reading your story of Noah. I thought about the
first Noah and his mission to save all life. We live in a
world on the edge of annihilation. I wonder if suicide is our
nature? In effect our industry is driven by war and
death. We feed on the dead. This precious blue planet will
become a cinder. Only Noah knows the truth.+


Review by bob county
Rated: E | (5.0)

"The machine must die or it ill kill us all."
(Harry S. Truman; The Industrial War Machine.)

"The beast is alive in my soul."
( Angel Passage; RE: Alan Moore, Tim Perkins.)

I like the primal scream in your tome.
I think you can still get a CD of Angel Passage.

"Praise the Lord from the earth,
You sea monsters and all deeps,
fire and hail, snow and frost,
Stormy wind fulling his commands!"
(Psalms 148:1-14)

Leviathan, Tiamat, the serpent that God created
to live with Adam in Genesis 3:1 all commanded
to sing "Hallelujah." For God wills good to come from
evil; so says the prophet Amos.

Review by bob county
Rated: E | (4.0)

Most American Presidents are at the mercy of the Federal Reserve.
This is not a dictatorship, but the value of the currency is managed by the
Federal Reserve. It is the one bank that cannot be audited. This is where
your poll is flawed. Personally, I think the biggest threat to the American
Presidency is the loss of manufacturing jobs in foreign trade.
How can an American President lead a country if he owes trillions of
dollars to China? If you want to know whose in charge follow the money.
I voted for Michael Dukakis. Oh, well.

Review of The Angels  
Review by bob county
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)

What a wonderful story. Gaspar was 112?
I'd like to know your research on that.
The infancy story in the Gospels was important
to the Messianic prophecy.
But, I never knew Gaspar was imprisoned.
The Apostle Thomas never mentioned Gaspar,
but they met in prison?
That is very strange legend.
Review of A KISS FROM ALEX  
Review by bob county
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)

There's nothing to criticize.
You have staged this ghost story perfectly.
Ghost are never easy to pin down.
I think it has to do with magnetic fields.
Think of the electromagnetic pulses of the brain
and how that can be effect by the magnetic field
around the Earth. That's a natural explanation for
paranormal events. Ghost are all around us and
within us in the electric air.
I really like the way this story builds up to an anticlimax.
That's a fun twist.

Review of Strawberry Swing  
Review by bob county
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)

Very nice swing.

It don't mean a thing if it
don't have that sing.

The dance is well written too. Did you know some of the passengers on
the Titanic were dancing as it sank? A near by freighter could hear the music.
I can't think of anything to improve this tome.

It has perfect swing.

Review by bob county
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)

The undiscovered unconscious. I see writing as therapeutic.
There is a danger of loosing your grip on reality. And many people
confuse art with confession. Glenda is good and Snow White is not?
I recommend Lars Von Trier ANTICHRIST. It's on DVD now.
It's a bloody exploration of feminism.

I sense a struggle in this revised fairy tale, between motherhood
and independence. In a dream we know nothing at all, just what
occurs to us: not moral or immoral. I keep a dream journal.
You should too. My dream journal is effected by my waking problems.
When I was visiting Ireland; I stood before a mountain and thought
is this God? I felt small and insignificant. I thought is this my world?
Can I own a mountain? Climbing the mountain was humbling.
I couldn't keep up with the rams and their path was less than a foot
wide. I gave up and my legs trembled as I descended. I dreamt
about falling down the mountain and sea gulls pecking out my eyes.


Do you want to be Snow White? I think we all do. But, nature is Satan's
church. She will humble us with blood and tears and death.
Of course this is not the direction your story is taking. But, it is what
I read.+

A story doesn't have to have a resolution. It can just stop.

I like that about this slice of Snow White.

^ +

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