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Review Requests: OFF
195 Public Reviews Given
212 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
*Buttonv* I tend to focus on how a piece makes me feel, rather than a line by line review. My reviews usually run around 1000 characters w/o Writing ML. If I notice spelling errors I'll be sure to point them out. *Buttong* As far as grammar, it's been a while since I was in school, but I an let you know if it sounds awkward or not. I may even look up some information on a particular so I can pass on correct info to you. *Buttonp* Many of my ratings fall between 3-5 stars. I will give out less for pieces that need a fair bit of polishing, but I also try to offer useful advice and a second review of the piece after it's been finished/polished.
I'm good at...
In my own writing, I guess it might be putting emotion into my poetry and prose.
Favorite Genres
Regency Romance,
Least Favorite Genres
Horror, Erotica,
Favorite Item Types
Poetry, Prose, Short Stories (1000 words or less for the purpose of reviewing.)
Least Favorite Item Types
I enjoy the occasional novel but have no time to review them.
I will not review...
Anything over 18+. Anything with erotica, occult, witches, demons, ghosts, zombies, fetishes.
Public Reviews
Previous ... 1 -2- 3 ... Next
26
26
Review by Winn Storm
In affiliation with WDC MOMs  
Rated: E | (5.0)

*ButtonB* *Buttonp* *ButtonBr* *Buttong* *Buttonv*


You are being reviewed by a member of
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This item number is not valid.
#1659337 by Not Available.


*Buttonr* First Impression
         I think that's a great idea. Although, I have no desire to spend the next 15 years nursing babies. WOW!

         Your article was informative and innovative. Nicely done!

*Buttono* Favorite line
         I have to say the best part was your link at the bottom! PlannerDan must forever regret his decision to read your article! Poor guy!

*Buttong* Suggestions
         No suggestions I could think of. Keep it up!

*Buttonb* Final Thoughts
         "Invalid Item has a monthly newsletter, and I would love to add a link to your article, with your permission!

*Buttonv* Rating
         *Star* *Star* *Star* *Star* *Star*


I think your piece would make a great addition our article in our next issue of
"Invalid Item
         Please let me know if this is something you are interested in.


Chelsea *RainbowL**Rainbowr*


My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed.
27
27
Review of Shattered Heart  
Review by Winn Storm
In affiliation with WDC MOMs  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*ButterflyB* *Butterflyg* *Butterflyo* *Butterflyr* *Butterflyv* *ButterflyB*

*ButterflyB* *Butterflyg* *Butterflyo* You are being reviewed by a "Invalid Item *Butterflyr* *Butterflyv* *ButterflyB*

*ButterflyB* *Butterflyg* in connection with "Invalid Item *Butterflyv* *ButterflyB*

*ButterflyB* *Butterflyg* *Butterflyo* *Butterflyr* *Butterflyv* *ButterflyB*


*Buttonr* First Impression
         This poem was short but with a lot of substance.

*Buttono* Favorite line
         I liked how you started with a melancholy theme but ends with hope.

But there is the sunshine,

*Buttong* Suggestions
         I think breaking it into stanzas would allow the reader to pause between the changes in mood that you describe.

         I might change lines 7 & 8 a little:

It's a cure for heartache
a reason to smile.


         I don't know, just another perspective.

         I also felt that it was almost a little too short, like there was missing something. Perhaps if the ending were a little bit stronger, it would be able to stand alone. Otherwise a few more lines could help to involve the reader more.

*Buttonb* Final Thoughts
         I think you a have a very nice poem here. I enjoyed the read, thanks for sharing.

*Buttonv* Rating
         *Star* *Star* *Star* *Star* *HalfStar*


Chelsea *RainbowL**Rainbowr*


My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed.
28
28
Review of A Mother Knows  
Review by Winn Storm
In affiliation with WDC MOMs  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
*Buttonb* *Buttonp* *Buttonbr* *Buttong* *Buttonv*


Hi, I'm reviewing this for WDC MOMs Review Swap! Check out our "Invalid Item

*Buttonr* First Impression
         Excellent use of detail, I felt like I was right there with you, through the whole ordeal.
The way you included the reader in your thoughts made it very personal. The waiting room with it's too cheery persona would have roused the same emotions in myself.


*Buttono* Favorite line
         There were several parts that really struck home for me. The part about the waiting room was one, your final two paragraphs were another. The melancholy way you end your story:

And Life goes on, like it always does. There is no great lesson to carry away... We are not designed to live in the past...

*Buttong* Suggestions
         Keep on sharing your work.

*Buttonb* Final Thoughts
         Your concluding paragraphs were very powerful, I cried the first time I read this. I lost my first child to a miscarriage, which was difficult enough, but to hold my child while he takes his last breaths, I can't even find the words.

Thank you so much for sharing.

*Buttonv* Rating
         *Star* *Star* *Star* *Star* *Star*


Chelsea *RainbowL**Rainbowr*


My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed.
29
29
Review by Winn Storm
Rated: E | (4.0)
First Impression
         First off, welcome to WDC! This is a really nice piece. I like the imagery you use here. I like how you see an image of yourself in the mirror but question it. It's you but you almost don't recognize yourself.

Favorite line: Nothing reflects what is on the inside

Suggestions
         Third stanza, 2nd line: I think you have a typo. it should be reflection not relection.

Final Thoughts
         Nicely done. Keep up the good work.


Chelsea *RainbowL**Rainbowr*


My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed.
30
30
Review of Conversation  
Review by Winn Storm
In affiliation with WDC MOMs  
Rated: E | (4.5)
You are being reviewed by a WDC MOM!
"Invalid Item

First Impression
         Thanks for sharing your poem. I really enjoyed this piece. The (I hope) playful, yet condescending sort of tone was refreshing.

Suggestions
         There were a few things that may need correcting.

Line 11: I think should be peoples minds not mind

Line 15: should be meditating instead of mediating

Line 19: might read better if you added to.

         I haven't named an object and compared it to life itself

          One last thought- I think the lack of stanzas works for this particular poem, but in such a case, I might consider using punctuation. There were a couple areas I found this might have been helpful.

Final Thoughts
         Again nice job. Keep up the good work. Oh and as a mother, I particularly enjoyed it since a lack of stimulating or adult (even if its not especially stimulating) conversation comes with the territory.

Chelsea *RainbowL**Rainbowr*


My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed.
31
31
Review of Lullaby  
Review by Winn Storm
In affiliation with WDC MOMs  
Rated: E | (4.0)
You are being reviewed by a WDC MOM!
"Invalid Item

First Impression
         I think this could use another stanza. It's a good piece so far but a third stanza will help create a clearer image/ scene in the readers mind. I like the melancholy, reflection that is taking place here.

         I really liked the line, cannot quench a dying earth.

Suggestions
         One thing that stuck out was your use of amongst. I believe that it is used correctly in the first stanza but should be replaced in the second. Try amid or admidst.

         The Online Dictionary defines amidst as being in the middle of or surrounded by something, and among as mingling or intermixing with distinct or separate objects. Another source says"Use among with plural, countable nouns — among friends, among passengers — and save amid for use with uncountable mass nouns — amid a crowd, amid congestion." So Hope could be said to be among (mingling with) crying hearts (which could be a countable number of hearts). Hope and the hearts being personified as individuals. While Love (again personified) is surrounded by rain. (an uncountable object).

I don't know, I hope that helps. My reviews don't normally include such technical advice.

Final Thoughts
         Anyhow, I do think this is a good piece and would love to read it again if you decide to add another stanza.


Chelsea *RainbowL**Rainbowr*

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed.
32
32
Review by Winn Storm
In affiliation with WDC MOMs  
Rated: E | (3.0)
You are being reviewed by a WDC MOM!
"Invalid Item

First Impression
         I really liked your opening lines.
Embrace the things that make you happy,
Release the things that don't.

         The message you share is an uplifting one,

Suggestions
         You have a few spelling mistakes.
Embrase should be embrace.
Endless thrist should be thirst.
Parfeum should be perfume.

         Unless of course those are the correct spellings where you are, then just ignore me.

         I found the second stanza a little awkward to read, you ended the first line part way through the phrase, (perhaps to make the lines more even in length). It might be better if you tried to break the line before and the joy of it never dies. and rework the first part to fit on one line.

Few are the things which bring joy
But from these the joy never dies


          I don't know something like that. Although that wasn't great.
          I think you should choose kissing or being kissed by a child. A kiss from a child. is a stronger statement.

Final Thoughts
         I think you have some very nice thoughts here and it has potential for being a good poem.

Thanks for sharing.

Chelsea *RainbowL**Rainbowr*

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed.
33
33
Review by Winn Storm
Rated: ASR | N/A (Review only item.)
It sounds like the beginning of a good story. A young, independent girl wanting to see the world.

Except for the references to Jane Austen's characters, I wouldn't have guessed this was a Jane Austen sequel, however. But I guess we all have our own takes on the characters. Perhaps if Jane Austen were to have lived in our time the Mary's outspokenness and flirtations wouldn't surprise me as much. Mary's interest in education and accomplishments is quite fitting to her character.

Jane is a hard act to follow and every reader has their own reasons for liking her. So, keep it up. It's great when the characters can take on a life of their own even after we have finished reading their story.

Thanks for sharing.
34
34
Review by Winn Storm
In affiliation with WDC MOMs  
Rated: E | (4.5)
You are being reviewed by a WDC MOM!
"Invalid Item

First Impression
         I liked your poem very much. I wouldn't have thought you were only 13 by reading this poem. On the review request page you said you felt it was of poor quality. I have to disagree. You have some very nice ways of expressing your feelings. Your poem is sincere and heartfelt.

Suggestions
         Even when writing free-verse poetry it's important to pay attention to the "flow" of the poem. The majority of your poem does flow well. You also have some examples of repetition or a pattern begining to emerge which also contribute to good flow. Your 4th stanza is a good example.

         I think the 2 nd stanza good use a little tweaking. Perhaps something like this:

It was her face upon which I first gazed,
Even as a total strange
I wanted to be near her.
Even without knowing her name
I could feel her warmth, her love.


          On your last stanza, I might leave out the "Yes," making it a stronger statement.

She's my mother,
The woman I will always look up to.



Final Thoughts
         I hope this helps you with your poem. I look forward to reading your other pieces. And don't worry about comparing yourself to other authors. You have a lot of natural talent and many on WDC have been writing a long time. But this is a great place to improve.

Keep up the good work.

Chelsea *RainbowL**Rainbowr*
35
35
Review by Winn Storm
Rated: E | (4.0)
I think a lot of the things you've mentioned is common sense, but a lot of people still get taken advantage through those very scams. I'm probably not as careful as I should be.

I have received those types of emails, if I don't know anything about it I delete and/or flag it as junk. I've also gone and removed myself from different list that, while I was interested in, comes with way too much spam from parent companies.

My husband and I used to buy our anti-virus programs, but they were only mostly or partially effective. Now we use several free programs, and that seems to work. Hackers seem to focus on the other anti-virus stuff. Although I'm not sure how my husband decides which free programs to use. So I would use caution there as well.

If I get junk mail from companies I recognize but that send too much junk I will unsubscribe.

Never heard of Snopes.com so I probably don't use it.

Thanks for your article on online safety. Sorry I didn't answer all your questions.
36
36
Review by Winn Storm
Rated: E | (4.5)
Interesting food for thought. I'm guessing not a lot of people know what to do with your sense of humor. I look forward to reading through more of your random thoughts. I think some of my friends would really like number 5.

Thanks for sharing your funny, if not odd, thoughts with us!
37
37
Review of In your portfolio  
Review by Winn Storm
Rated: E | (4.0)
Besides static items, which are mostly poems, I have quite few images. More than I need really.
38
38
Review by Winn Storm
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
I find myself very annoyed with poor spelling; use a spell checker. But even worse is poetry that has no point, no emotion, no question or thought to ponder.

I would prefer a poem that doesn;t rhyme but has beautifully chosen words and good flow than one that rhymes but sounds like a bad childrens rhyme.

I hope that answers your question. Although a few more options in your poll might have been nice.
39
39
Review by Winn Storm
Rated: E | (4.0)
I find it interesting how many people chose "the entire Bible". In my experience when discussing this with various people, which I spend a considerable amount of my time doing, they are often surprised by some of the things mentioned in the Bible or find that some of it isn't what they have been taught.
40
40
Review of Who was Jesus?  
Review by Winn Storm
Rated: E | (3.5)
I believe Jesus to be God's son, his first creation. An angel whose life force was placed in a woman and born as a perfect human. Until his baptism at 30 years of age he was aware of his pre-human existence but without the memories of it.

After his death he returned to heaven, and returned to his angelic form.
41
41
Review by Winn Storm
Rated: E | (5.0)
Great poll! It's interesting to know what others look for in contests.

I created a survey about the same topic. I was hoping to be able to use the information for any contests I might host in the future. Maybe if you would like to check it out.

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This item number is not valid.
#1665344 by Not Available.


Or if you don't have the time take my poll.

"Invalid Item.

Thanks for letting me take your poll.

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42
42
Review of WRITER'S BLOCK  
Review by Winn Storm
In affiliation with  
Rated: E | (4.5)
You are being reviewed by
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First Impression
         I like to see what other people come up with when trying to overcome writers block. This piece has a really interesting rhythm to it. And very aptly describes what I go through, all too often.

Suggestions
         I started out giving you *Star**Star**Star**Star* but decided to give you the extra *Halfstar* after reading your poem a second time.

         The one area I thought was awkward was:
I'm thinking a hundred thoughts.
I reject each one.
         There was nothing wrong with it on its own. It just didn't seem to fit in with the rhythm of the rest of the flow. "I reject each one." is too short.

Final Thoughts
         Nicely done.

Maybe you'd be interested in reading another poets take on writers block.
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This item number is not valid.
#1669554 by Not Available.


I also have a piece on Writers block, but is much shorter and more about the emptiness of it.
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                             Chelsea
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43
43
Review by Winn Storm
Rated: E | (5.0)
Thanks so much for all you do with your contests!

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44
44
Review by Winn Storm
In affiliation with WDC MOMs  
Rated: E | (4.5)
You are being reviewed by a WDC MOM!
"Invalid Item

First Impression
         Thank you so much for sharing your personal experience. I hope today is a better day, for you both. I am a mother and cannot possibly begin to imagine your pain and the courage you must have to face each day. You have done an excellent job in expressing your grief. I hope that those who read this remember it long after their next meal.

Suggestions
         Your writing is full of emotion and very compelling. There are some grammatical errors, (the only reason you didn't receive 5 stars) but your talent for sharing your thoughts still comes through very well.

         It might help if you broke it up into smaller paragraphs, visually.

Final Thoughts
         If your future pieces show half as much depth and feeling, then you are definitely going to be a favorite author of mine.

Welcome to WDC.

Maybe you'd like to check out our group.
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                             Chelsea
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45
45
Review by Winn Storm
Rated: E | (5.0)
They look great!
46
46
Review by Winn Storm
In affiliation with  
Rated: E | (3.5)
You are being reviewed by
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First Impression
         You have some very nice elements to your piece. I quite liked what you have so far. I liked your title, I Think You Might Love Me Too{/i]. I also like the lines:
My eyes are open wide.
Only to myself have I lied.


Suggestions
         Your poem looks a little cluttered. Breaking it into stanzas would help.

         I might change
You’re the only one to whom that I would be true.
          to You're the only one to whom I could be true.

         I think your last line could be broken up a bit, with each sentence on its own line.
I think that I’m in love with you.
Please say that you love me too.


         Your rhymes are ok but they get a little repetitive. It would be great if you could change it up a little.

Final Thoughts
         Realizing after a relationship has ended that your feelings were deeper than you thought is something many people could relate to. Keep up the good work.

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                             Chelsea
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On April 29th 2010, I chose the following poem to carry in my pocket for the National Poem In Your Pocket Day.

*Rainbowl* Summer Rain *RainbowR*
Lush Revival


Summer rain,
Dripping from fingers of green,
Running the creases of lush foliage,
Reviving beneath cool beads of splendor and satisfaction,
Soothing rain,
Trailing the shelves of nature,
Trickling down dehydrated wood,
Collecting in the palms of thirsty trees waiting for the quench,
Silent rain,
Fading into the warm mist,
Disappearing in the sodden earth,
Leaving behind a short lived fresh breath of true serenity.

Self-Asylum (Nichole Sauve)
47
47
Review of Replaced  
Review by Winn Storm
In affiliation with  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
You are being reviewed by

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First Impression
         Very entertaining and cute poem. I liked the comment about golf. Your last stanza is by far your strongest and wraps up your piece nicely. Good work.

Suggestions
         While the beginning of your piece is good, I found it weaker when compared to you last two stanzas.

Final Thoughts
         It was a fun topic to write a poem about, keep on writing.

Chelsea *Reading*
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On April 29th 2010, I chose the following poem to carry in my pocket for the National Poem In Your Pocket Day.

*Rainbowl* Summer Rain *RainbowR*
Lush Revival


Summer rain,
Dripping from fingers of green,
Running the creases of lush foliage,
Reviving beneath cool beads of splendor and satisfaction,
Soothing rain,
Trailing the shelves of nature,
Trickling down dehydrated wood,
Collecting in the palms of thirsty trees waiting for the quench,
Silent rain,
Fading into the warm mist,
Disappearing in the sodden earth,
Leaving behind a short lived fresh breath of true serenity.

Self-Asylum (Nichole Sauve)
48
48
Review of ava  
Review by Winn Storm
In affiliation with WDC MOMs  
Rated: E | (4.0)
You are being reviewed by a WDC MOM!
"Invalid Item

First Impression
         Excellent piece about the joys of pregnancy. Having a life growing inside you is one of the most amazing experiences a person can have. You manage to give the world a small glimpse of that.

Suggestions
         I think your poem might benefit from breaking up the lines a little more.
You have made me more of a woman
because you require all of me.
Gone are all of my selfish ways
and all I want is for you to be all you can be.

Right now you grow inside of me
and voice your opinion through kicks and undulate my skin.
Soon you will be playing
and talking with your kin.

The time passes by so fast,
your growth makes me think of the past.
All i wish is that my memories
of you and me as one will always last.


Final Thoughts
         Keep up the good work.

Maybe you'd like to check out our group.
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I'm also a member of:
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Chelsea *Reading*


49
49
Review of SEASONS  
Review by Winn Storm
In affiliation with  
Rated: E | (4.5)
You are being reviewed by "Invalid Item

First Impression
         Nicely done. Your poem is short and sweet. I like how your piece comes full circle, just like the seasons. Ending with spring, is like ending with hope.

Suggestions
         In your first line, I would leave out the "and".
Daffodils, tulips, lilies too

Final Thoughts
         Thanks for sharing and keep on writing!

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I'm also a member of:
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Chelsea *Reading*


50
50
Review of If....  
Review by Winn Storm
In affiliation with  
Rated: E | (4.0)
You are being reviewed by "Invalid Item

First Impression
         Thanks for sharing your work with us on WDC. I really like the message within your piece. It's so true that if you are to make a difference, you need to do more than take away the weapons. Peoples hearts need to change, if this world is ever going to change.

         Your opening four lines were really strong and started your poem off well. Good work.

Suggestions
         SPELLING: lindmines should be land mines.

         The 4th line in your second stanza feels too long. What if you said:
would there be any left to blame? instead of anyone?

Final Thoughts
         Nice job. Definitely food for thought.

Welcome to WDC! And keep on writing!

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Chelsea *Reading*


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