|An swift period drama set in the virtual locale we call WDC. MysteryWoman2018 is the protagonist, and typical of a ghost story, the antagonist is unknown or indistinct. My goal to be helpful for polishing the piece. I am a proofreader first, so let's look at clarity and style. I found a few typos, just missing letters from typing errors, skipped words, or misplaced caps, as I see... An early example: "She smiled as _he started looking around at her fellow WDCers." I noticed that a choice seems to have been made for every character/username: the name is without spacing. "The Mystic Warrior" appears once, but seems to be the only username that has spaces. For continuity, the author may want to change that one to follow the style of the others. I do think highlighting the Birthday week as a function of the story structure is clever, but I also think it is under utilized for the length of story the piece is currently. Maybe the author plans on fleshing it out with more comings and goings? There is a point moving to day four, when it is flowing directly from one moment to the next, yet all the other instances hint at passage of a greater amount of time. On the smart side, the action runs like a scripted TV drama, so nothing extraneous slows the action. Yet, the question remains, is this best as a short situation piece, or could it develop into something more haunting and in depth with more description and character development?