I'm back here in writing.com. I'm like a newbie but not. Haha!
|After a year of slumber, here I am writing again for what it feels like a decade. I deleted by old account airkat and I also deleted some of its folders. I kinda miss writing as well as writing.com because I realized last night that writing.com has a lot of great writers especially adult and mature ones whom I can learn from as well as asked for advice in writing unlike other websites that I have discovered just this year.
Writing is fun when you see it as a hobby, writing is not fun when you see it as a job especially when you are near the deadline of submitting your work to your editor or a publishing company. Everyday when I have a free time to ask myself about certain things such as new stories, random ideas and different feelings about a situation; I discovered that there is a limited amount of time I have to actually store those things inside my head, so writing is also a way of releasing too much memory stored in your brain. It's like there is an expiration period to an idea so you have to save it by writing it down. I also have frustrated moments when I cannot finish a story mainly because I don't know how to describe it in words and because English is my second language. All my life I study English and I even learn how to write in English first before in Filipino which is my own language. I have a lot of hard time trying to glue the pieces inside my head as well as the words I'm going to use but it just doesn't work. As time passes by and as my time for writing is consumed by my busy schedule because it's my last year in college, I decided to ignore writing and concentrate on my priorities and that is to finish school.
Sometimes I think I'm starting to lose my love in writing when I don't use it or practice it anymore and I didn't do anything about it. I'm scared that my level of writing from level 2 starts to deteriorate to level 1. I know it's kinda pathetic to actually think about it but still the fact that the only thing or maybe one of the things I consider important and love is slowly drifting away because I don't give time to it anymore. I even dream about my stories, literally dream about it when I'm asleep. After finishing school, it doesn't end there, I have to review for the board exam for nurses for two and a half months. I did play while reviewing but it is just a way of releasing tension, by play I mean, surfing the internet, watch DVDs and Korean drama series. I forgot writing for a little while. I took the two-day examination and was relieved by not reviewing anymore but here's the tormenting part, waiting the results if I passed or not.
The days passed and I'm kinda lost of what I'm going to do with my free time. Working is not an option for me, the reason, my dad won't let me. I know that I'm twenty and it kinda sucks that I'm still depending on my parents but it is just the way our culture is and I guess it is just my decision to be that kind of person. I worked inside the house as a housekeeper, a mother to my siblings when my mom is working and a potato couch. I finished watching Criminal Minds series and I'm so into this profiling and behavior analyzing thing. Yes, it is similar to psychology. I read stories online and I'm kinda enjoying it right now. Then last night, it hit me. Why don't I continue doing the thing I love in this world before Korean dramas and facebook? Writing.
So, maybe I will continue writing until I'm satisfied with my characters and their ending and maybe I will start posting here my stories again. I'm excited to see criticisms whether positive or not because I appreciate the fact that you instill your time in reading my stories and pointing out my mistakes to which I believe will help me become a better writer in the future.