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Rated: 13+ · Poetry · Comedy · #2233174
Today I was feeling a little 'goofy'. The result when your mind goes to strange places
Two Twisted Tales


Three little pigs walked the path to the market,
Two little pigs came home, colored scarlet
One little pig wanted ham, what an animal,
The other little pig frowned, called him “Cannibal!”

Two little pigs went out to a party,
Both of them dined & ate quite heartedly,
One little pig came home quite sad,
His friend, now bacon, to the bone, was bad.

One little pig lay around the house,
A place much quieter than a mouse.
Fell ‘dead’ asleep, never woke the next morn
Like his friends, he was food; his skin, now shorn.


There once were three bears, a girl with hair so golden,
Hung straight as an arrow, was never woven,
The youngest bear loved a child so blue,
They eloped and ran to live in an old shoe.

Goldie’s best friend Jack was nimble as can be,
While their friend Mary, was quite contrary you see.
Mary’s mother, Ms. Hubbard, tried to bake a pie,
That Horner kid from the corner, was known to be shy.

One day they all met, well, except for Jack that is,
He’d met Rapunzel, wanted to make her his.
Then the girl in the hood turned red with rage,
For she wanted Jack herself, and ‘turn a new page’.

R & J were wed in a church by a creek,
The minister thought the outlook was bleak.
But Red Hooded one decided to marry,
One of her own kind, Contrary Mary.

All’s well in this tale, no violence you see,
Everyone’s found someone, no singles left free.
Like most fairytales, this one ends well,
It makes little sense, but what the hell….

Jim Dorrell
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