Well, it seems God has become disallusioned with mankind... starting with Americans, it seems. New York is in for another surprise, much worse than the WTC tragedy. God has ordered an apocalypse. Why? Because governments, monarches and people who run themselves are an obstruction to humanity in His eyes.
Now Josh (aka Jophiel) has been sent to Earth to join up with several other angels to carry out God's plan for unsuspecting New York residents. God chose NY first, because he considered it the root of all evil in the supposedly 'moral' country of the United States. Josh is having second thoughts about carrying out God's plan, and a voice that keeps telling him to follow what's in his heart leads Josh to conclude that God will destroy every ounce of faith left in the human race by carrying out his plan on Easter. (If any humans survive, that is.)
Will Josh carry out God's plan...or not? The ending will definitely catch the reader by surprise! Did evil save the people of New york and the human race? I'm not telling... you'll have to read this story to find out.
This story was well choreographed.
Consider the following when editing:
They got full and he bent over and brought the small puddle of water to his face; )(,) repeating the motion several times before reaching for a jet black (jet-black) hand towel.
His breath was quick and his eyes glowing (glowed) a golden color for a moment before fading back into a lonely gray.
he could smell the bitter sweet (bittersweet) liquid as it poured from the gash he created.
He let his eyes stray off the shadow and onto the digital alarm clock again. 3:50AM. (Timeline: he got up and went to the bathroom at 2:10am and sat on the bed at 3:50am... he was in the bathroom for an hour and forty minutes??)
Pulling the drawer open he reached in and grabbed what ever (whatever) his hand found first and yanked it out, throwing it over his shoulder.
Deep down, a human was no smarter than an ape and (that reason alone led God toward this final battle.) for that reason alone led God toward this final battle.
No one was around, which was strange(,) but it didn’t seem to bother him much.
His eyes became wide and muscles tense (and his muscles tensed) as the shadowy figure approached him.
He wasn’t sure if he was really blind or (if) it was just extremely twilight.
He noticed that the sun was starting (to) shine an orange color in the sky.
Not sure who or what the figure was(,) he just pushed the moment into the back of his head, hoping it (would stay there and not resurface.) to stay there and not resurface.
Josh would always come in here around this time and watch the humans before they }(their) day got busy and they all turned into rotten, pushy and easily-irritated people.
Feeling the man’s eyes on him, Josh just continued to stare at the checkered tile which (that) made up the counter.
The sensation went away quickly as always and he brought the cup to his lips, sipped some, and placed it back down; (,) his eyes never leaving the counter.
The little bell made a noise, telling everyone in the diner that someone has (had) entered.
Josh could only see blonde hair and white skin with a brownish tent (tint) to it.
Her hair was pulled back into a messy, unkempt pony-tail (ponytail) and she was wearing a dark blue T-Shirt, (T-shirt) with matching jacket, and a few little black bracelets on her wrists.
“Do you mind if I…join you?” He (he) asked a bit hesitantly.
Her eyes trialed (trailed) over him from top to bottom and then back to the top; shaking her head(,) she motioned for him to take a seat across from her.
He turned his attention to her and was about to speak but she beat him to (it) is.
“What do you want?” She (she) asked, not lifting her eyes from the paper; her voice cold and stern.
“I need to tell you something important...if you’ll listen(,") .” He (he) said slowly, trying to figure out what compelled him to say those words.
“Humor me(,") .” She (she) said placing her elbows on the table and lacing her fingers together in order to give her chin a resting place.
The blood and gash was (were) gone, not even a scar remained.
He decided it was time to just tell her; her, a complete stranger that he met not five minutes ago.
(Suggest: He decided it was time to just tell her, a complete stranger that he met only five minutes ago.)
You seriously need to stop thinking of yourself so highly(,") .” She (she) said placing her hands on the table.
Right?” she (She) grinned and raised her eyebrows.
Josh didn’t say anything and looked at the empty space of the booth she was sitting (in) on.
Your room is number 325 and you hide your spare key under the flower pot (outside of your room.") on the outside your room.”
“Elizabeth, will you please stop?” he asked weaving in and out of people while still remaining at her (heels) heals.
“You can’t avoid me forever(,) Elizabeth.
I know where you live(,) remember?” he said finally as they turned down an alley, away from the crowd at last.
He’s been with you since the day you were born(,") .” Josh said simply, as if it was just a normal thing to talk about.
You can’t see him because your mind is of a lower plane(,) .” He (he) explained as her expression turned from annoyance and frustration to a this-guy-is-crazy kind of look.
Either she did hear him or she was stopping to tease him; which ever (whichever) it was(,) she looked back at him.
“Leave me alone. I don’t want you near me ever again(,) .” She (she) growled and turned her head forward and began to walk again.
There was a huge flapping noise, like a flock of birds just flew over head (overhead) and she turned back; he was gone.
Elizabeth knelt down and picked up a farley (fairly) large, white feather.
Her finger brushed over it gently as she looked up out of the alley toward the gray-tented (gray-tinted) sky.
“Could he have been telling the truth?” She (she) trailed off then stood and put the feather in her jacket pocket(. She walked out of the alley.), then walked out of the alley.
“So here you are(,) Jophiel.
I thought I felt your presence in this section of this miserable little city(,") .” Someone (someone) said from behind Josh.
“Gabriel…” Josh growled in a most unpleased (unpleasant) manner.
Remember, I am of a higher rank then (than) you(,) my dear friend(,") .” Gabriel said holding up his hand.
“You are still just an archangel to me, which makes us the same(,) you lying piece of-“
“Stop…calling me that(,") .” Josh managed to say through his teeth, trying to hide the unbearable feeling of total anger.
I just thought I’d tell you the meeting sight (site,") .” He (he) said, his sliver (silver) wings expanding out.
his eyes were barely open from the glare he was giving the blonde haired (blond-haired) angel.
Good (hygiene) Hygiene?” Gabriel snickered.
It taught me to that no one ever got anywhere being stuck up (stuck-up) and self-righteous!” Josh yelled(,) his anger now showing.
Josh stumbled to the side of the building, catching the edge quickly (and) saving himself from a long drop.
You have gotten yourself into quite the situation(,) haven’t you?
My my my…quite the situation(,) .” Gabriel said, his lips forming a smile of complete enjoyment.
“If I let go not only will my cover be blown but your (yours) will as well!
“Are you doing…the right…think (thing)?” it said, fading in and out as it asked.
He visions (vision) was blurry, like he was in a thick fog or smoke.
Forget what everyone else says, take control and fight for what you believe is justifiable(," the voice said.) .” The voice said.
“Eliza…beth?” Josh whispered, opening his eyes a bit(,) then completely as the (they) adjusted (to the light.) ; blurry for a minute then clear.
“Sh…Don’t talk(,") .” She (she) said(.) , “I would say you are lucky to be alive but that wouldn’t be fair (accurate) since you technically aren’t living.”
I think you hurt the car more then (than) the car hurt you(,") .” She (she) said with a slight giggle.
The ambulance came and took you here shortly after the (they) confirmed you were alive.”
It was on the news(,") .” She (she) said straightforwardly.
“Josh(,") .” He (he) said reaching over and grabbing the IV needle he had in his left arm.
I don’t feel pain(,") .” He (he) said getting ready to sit up.
(Note: A comma is required before the quote mark before the tagline, and the tag begins with a lowercase letter unless it is a name. Check the story and change where needed.)
“I…have a few questions I’d like to ask you. If you don’t mind answering them that is.”
(I...have a few questions I'd like to ask, if you don't mind that is.")
Her voice was barely audio able (audible) , but he heard.
She had a small kitchen}(,) which was located to the right of the main door.
Such thoughts are enough to get you into a heap of trouble. He thought loudly in his mind.
(Italicize thoughts. Such thoughts are enough to get you into a heap of trouble, he thought loudly in his mind.)
Her eyes got wide as that simple motion lead (led) her to the conclusion that this city was going to be the first to go in God’s Revolution against all humans.
She clenches (clenched) her fists so tight (tightly) that her nails dig (dug) into her (palms.) palm.
Josh continued to looks (look) out the window, his voice (a) monotone as he answers. (answered,) “He wants to destroy New York first because he thinks that this is the root of most of the evil in the supposedly moral country of the United States.
“All I can tell you is that he wants to (delete 'to') humans to prove themselves worthy of living in his kingdom after they die.
She sat there and opened her hand to look at (the) little crescent shaped (crescent-shaped) indents on her palm.
I mean you can talk to Him(,) can’t you?” She (she) asked standing.
“There has to be someway (some way) to stop this…There just has to be.”
She nodded; a bit annoyed that he is (was) just going to leave without anymore (any more) information about why he wants her to meet him at Ground Zero.
She waited a few seconds then ran over to the door, flung (flinging) it open to see an empty hallway.
He had received the meeting point while he was talking to her and decided to leave so he wouldn’t reveal to (too) much to her at one time.
So, God is going to start the assault on the day His son came back to life. Josh thought as he walked slowly back to his place.
(So, God is going to start the assault on the day His son came back to life, Josh thought as he walked slowly back to his place.)
They will think that Christ has rose (risen) again to liberate them, but what they will fail to realize is that the “liberation” is really a crusade to end their lives.
If (Is) he really this determined to prove them a pack of animals?”
He found himself breathing hard and heard (the faint noise of a siren in the background.) a faint noise in the background; a siren.
He made his way to the top of the pile as quickly as he could without causing a while (wild?) heap of rocks to fall on top of him.
He brushed himself off the looked up; (,) his eyes instantly getting wide.
He saw a very familiar sight; (,) his popcorn ceiling.
It was all just a dream. He thought to himself as he sat up and noticed he had fallen off the bed onto the floor.
(It was all just a dream, he thought as he sat up and noticed he had fallen off the bed onto the floor.)
He has (had) thirty minutes to get to the meeting place.
He bents (bent) over and grasped the bottom of the window; then lifted.
His eye caught something moving(,) then he noticed it was a person.
“We have company(,) boys.
He grabbed her by the throat and squeezed his hand, not quite crushing her (windpipe.) wind pipe.
The war we are about (to) start is going to be meaningless.
He was no more then (than) a few inches away from Gabriel’s face.
“What are you going to do when you are done torching this world and all this (that) live in it?
The next thing Josh saw was stars; Gabriel punched him in the temple and sent the black haired (black-haired) boy on a one way (one-way) flight into a pile of rubble.
You have forsaken yourself(,) Jophiel.
He couldn’t hold it any longer; he let out an ear piercing (ear-piercing) scream and released all his power with a blinding flash of light.
The power that Lucifer had added to Josh’s severed the eight angel’s (angels') bodies into small chunks of flesh, bone, and blood soaked (blood-soaked) feathers.
Her finger pressed the keys on the key board (keyboard) diligently, entering her final phrase.
Something soft brushed her finger tips (fingertips) and she pulled it out; (,) a white feather.
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