%%USERNAME%%    %%ACCWORDS%% %%ONOFF%% |
 |
My thoughts released; a mind set free |
|
These pages contain my thoughts, from meandering ideas and persuasions to deep cerebrations and serious mentations. Why, for what purpose? To release my mind and set creativity free. Somewhere inside the constraints of my mind dwells a writer, a poet, an artist who paints with words. In here I release those constraints and set the artist free. Perhaps, lost somewhere in the depths of thought, is a story or a poem, waiting to be written. 
|
| Wow, this is the earliest I've been in to write my blog in a long time. I have one minute till midnight by WDC time, but here it's only going on eleven. I may be in bed before midnight! So, it's black Friday, but with the way things are, a lot of places have been doing online black Friday all week. Still, I know a lot of people were probably our for the sales, if the stores did an in-store sale. My wife and I don't do the black Friday thing. One reason is the madness of people competing for the sales items. It's like, Thursday give thanks for all you have, and then Friday it's push, shove, and do whatever you can to get what you want. The two days are kind of an oxymoron. The biggest reason we don't do the black Friday thing is because for years we worked it. We did yard security for a home improvement store, so we didn't see how crazy it was inside except for shift changes. Even so, many items were set out in the yard and we had to deal with guests, as the store called them, coming in to pick up items. The people were rude, would not follow directions, and even became somewhat hostile if they had to wait to enter. Normally, if we needed a break we would radio the store and have a store employee come out and fill in for us while we took a bathroom break. But on black Friday, we couldn't get a break because the store was too busy to send anyone out. Of course the yard was also busy, non stop running to let people in and to check people out. The only solution was to try and schedule the guards for three or four hour shifts, which meant having to spit shifts up and needing to work numerous shifts to cover the day; a real pain in the caboose for me since I did the scheduling and often had to fill unfilled shifts. |
| Happy Thanksgiving. Yes, it's Thursday night here at home even though it's after midnight within the site. We had a wonderful Thanksgiving, even though it wasn't starting out that way. Our plans were to spend the day with my mother-in-law at her house with my sister-in-law and her family also meeting us there. Of course, things changed; that's the motto for this year, go ahead and plan, but it will change. A couple of weeks ago, they had a positive covid exposure within their family. It turned out fine, the fella who contracted the virus didn't even get sick and if it hadn't been for mandatory testing, he wouldn't have even known. Not only did he not get sick, but he also recovered very rapidly and tested negative the following week. The rest of the family also tested negative to covid but had contacted another virus, the common cold. Since they all got sick with the cold, they stayed home to prevent spreading it, even though they're all feeling better already. We had plans to be up early, get things ready, then head over to my mother-in-law's to fix dinner, with plans to eat around three. That meant getting everyone to bed on time, but the youngest girl couldn't sleep. I finally got her to doze off around midnight, spent another hour online to ensure she stayed asleep, then retired myself at one-thirty. I was very tired and fell asleep quickly. A couple of hours later I woke from a bad dream; a real nightmare. In my dream, the youngest girl woke up and went out to the living room and turned on the television. Instead of streaming from Netflix, it streamed a demon into the living room which killed her and left her lying on the floor in front of the set, then proceeded to the older girl's room and killed her. In my dream, I had woken up and found my youngest daughter on the floor. Before I ran to the older daughter's room, the demon had done its work and had moved to our room, and even as I checked on the older daughter killed my wife. I knew it was a dream, but I had to get up and check. I told myself, "No, it's just a dream." then went to the bathroom and was going to return to bed. But I couldn't without checking on the girls. I looked in on the youngest daughter and her bed was empty! I hustled out to the living room and there she was, flat on her back in front of the tv, just like in my dream. I knew the dream wasn't real, and the last thing I wanted was to wake her, but I had to check. I got down on the floor beside her and put my ear close to her mouth. She was breathing slowly and deeply, sound asleep. Satisfied, I checked on the older girl and found her safely sleeping in her bed. It was, I repeated, "Just a dream." I got back into bed and snuggled up to my wife and soon began drifting off to sleep. But even as I began to doze, the nightmare continued. The demon was there telling me in my half-sleep that I had missed my chance to save the girls and send it back to hell by turning the tv on and capturing it. It then turned and kind of wafted into my youngest daughter's room. I had to save her so I forced myself to wake and follow. But even as I got ready to turn on the tv in her room, it pushed past me for the living room. It halted at my room and commanded my wife to stop me, then floated on. As I tried to follow she got up and started asking me if I was alright and what was wrong. I told her I was in a nightmare and pushed past her to the living room. As I got to the room the demon was leaning over my daughter and reaching for her chest. I grabbed the control and turned the tv on just in time. The demon went into the bright screen and was gone. With a sigh of relief, I returned to bed. But when I got into bed, my wife sat up and asked me what was going on and if I was alright. I couldn't tell if it was still the nightmare or if I was asleep; I was stuck half awake, half asleep, half in reality, and halfway in a dream. I told her I had a bad dream and that everything was fine, but I wasn't sure if I had woke up or if I was still dreaming about everything. I got back up, grabbed my robe, went out to the kitchen, grabbed a cigarette and went outside into the cold. I sat out there in the cold smoking my cigarette until I was sure I wasn't dreaming anymore. I put it out, went back in, checked on everyone, then went back to bed and fell asleep a little after four. I was up again at seven-thirty, very tired and feeling very beaten down. My wife was also up and knew I had a rough night. She told me I was up a couple of times, went to the girl's rooms, turned on the tv just to turn it back off, and when she asked, just ignored her and got back up and went out to smoke. I explained it all to her before we left, took a nap after dinner, and so far it's been a good night. I hope by writing it all out, the dream will not return and I can sleep soundly tonight. Perhaps somewhere in all of this, there's a good story to be told one day. |
| This is my Wednesday night entry, but again, after midnight. That means it is officially Thursday and Thanksgiving. Happy Thanksgiving! We aren't doing anything too much for the day, but since my mother-in-law is getting up there in years and would be spending her first Thanksgiving home alone, we're heading over to her house right away in the morning. Well cook dinner over there, spend a nice day, and then the plan is to come back home. She tends to do her best to get us to spend the night, so that may also be a possibility. Even so, I will be coming home tomorrow to take care of the pets. We have three now, Hannah our dog, Pizza, the oldest girl's hamster, and Hurricane, the younger daughter's chicken. Yes, you read that correctly, a chicken. Hannah was already adopted when we started fostering the girls, adopted herself from the pound, pending euthanization. After the girls moved in with us, they each wanted a pet but being in an apartment we were limited on what to get for them. Also, Hannah tends to be very tough on other animals; she never learned to get along with any growing up in the pound. For some reason, she doesn't always get along with other dogs, even though she grew up with other dogs in the pound. The older girl got a hamster about the size of a small guinea pig and it's still doing great. The younger girl got an older hamster from a friend and it passed shortly after we took it in. We purchased another, a dwarf hamster, but it also passed within a few months. Next, we tried a gerbil that did a little better, but not much. She loves animals but can be a little rough on them, but we have no way of knowing why they didn't live longer. Late this fall, I was surprised one evening to see a chicken in the driveway. There isn't anyone close with chickens, but some distance away I hear a rooster once in a while. I figured it got out and would soon head back home for the night. The next few days were cold, snowing and we didn't go out all weekend. Monday, however, it was nice again, the snow was melting, and I wanted to get the recyclables hauled. I was surprised to see the chicken come out from under the pickup. I felt bad for it, living for three days under the pickup without much for it to eat except snow. I grabbed a handful of birdseed and tossed it out, the chicken came right out to me, hungry and pecking up seeds. So, instead of taking the truck to haul recyclables, we took the car and drove around the area to see if anyone had chickens, but we didn't find her home. Next, we drove to the local farm and fleet store and purchased a huge dog kennel, and fixed it up a bit for a chicken. by the time we were ready for her, she had retired under the vehicle and was roosting on the axle. It took a little coaxing to get her to come out, and it took a few minutes more to get her to trust me to pick her up, but soon enough we had her in the cage. I wasn't sure how well she would like to be caged up, but she made herself right at home. In fact, it almost seemed like she was accustomed to being in a cage and felt safe and secure again. She became another pet, supposedly the younger girls, but we all take care of her. |
| I made it before midnight, again. Well my time, not WDC, but that's alright. It was a pretty trying day, but it worked out good even if it started kind of rough. The girls were slow getting up and then ended up missing the bus because they had to get on their phones instead of getting ready. My wife works at the school and left just after the bus usually stops. She asked the girls if they wanted to ride in with her, but they opted to wait for the bus. Why? So they could spend more time on their phones before school. Of course, I didn't know this at the time. I was just getting my day started when in comes the oldest and tells me that the bus didn't come. I looked at the clock and it was already ten minutes after the bus stop schedule. It kind of upset me how she so quickly decided that the bus didn't come, even though she knew she was running behind and had missed the bus. I started up the truck and started cleaning the snow off so I could take them to school. Imagine the surprise when we turned the corner by the school and seen all the buses leaving. Next on the agenda was my computer. I had decided to take it in to Best Buy today, since it's under warranty. It's about seventy miles one way, so I tried doing as much as I could online. Only, when I tried to set up an appointment, I couldn't get the site to comply, it wanted me to go into chat to set it up. I went into chat and after waiting for fifteen minutes and still not having anyone to chat with, I decided I'd just drive in and drop it off. I loaded it up, made sure I had the receipt and extended warranty, a cup of coffee, and Hannah, our dog. By this time it was a little after ten. The drive was slower than I would have liked, since it was sleeting a little, had snowed earlier, and was also very foggy. I got to Best Buy about eleven-thirty. I put on my mask and carried everything across the slippery parking lot and into the store. I was greeted right away by a young woman who was more than happy to help me. She took my name, asked about the problem I was having, and checked her schedule, I could bring the computer in at two-thirty. Of course, I knew it was going to take a while to fix so my plan was simple, drop it off, then once they get it fixed next week, or thereabouts, I would return to pick it up. The young lady confirmed it would be a week or so, but I couldn't leave it without an appointment. This made no sense to me, so I inquired why I would have to make an appointment to drop off my computer to get fixed sometime in the future when they could get to it. I was trying not to get agitated and she was nice about it. She explained that they were short on help in the repair section so it was taking longer than normal. She also stated that because of the pandemic, they were required to set up all repairs by appointment and could not just let people come in and drop off. I knew it wasn't her policy and that there wasn't anything she could do about it, so all I could do was book the two-thirty slot and thank her for her time. She smiled, apparently she was more use to customers venting their disgruntlement upon her instead of realizing she was doing the best she could. She leaned in closer so the other person at the front couldn't hear, and told me she could get me in at two. I was back at two and had the computer hauled in. She smiled and verified my name and sent me back to repairs where they looked up my warranty and got some information, slapped a sticker on the computer and said they could look at it there if I wanted to pay for labor, or they could send it in were it should be fully covered under the warranty. Either way it would be about two weeks to get it back again. I picked the free option and was done in about five minutes. As I was turning to leave, another employee asked if I had everything taken care of. I informed her I did, but wasn't the happiest about not being able to get in without a two hour wait after driving for almost as long to get there on crappy roads. I also informed her that I knew there wasn't anything that could be done about it, except maybe get their scheduling problem corrected online. She surprised me and asked if I could hang out for a few minutes while she checked the site. After a couple minutes on her tablet, she apologized and said they would get someone working on the problem right away. She also said she could offer me a discount on anything in the store to help over come the long drive and wait. Since I was out my Windows computer and my wife has been using my netbook that is at least ten years old and slower than slow, I decided to look at some computers. I was interested in a laptop for my wife, since I have a nice desktop machine. Most were way more than I wanted to spend, but they had some deals that were withing my purchasing powers. I ended up looking at a Lenovo that went about $600.00 originally but was on sale for 450.00. I asked a few questions about it and it sounded like the computer my wife and I had looked at a couple of times, only a different company. I was hard pressed to get it, knowing my wife needed one and I could use it until I got mine back, but I just wasn't sure I should spend that much right then. She said she would be right back and returned with a store manager, explaining my long drive, my wait, and how I was interested in this particular computer. She asked if there was any way I could get it for the Black Friday online price. The manager agreed and I ended up buying it for 299.00. It's kind of funny how being nice and understanding can turn a bad day good. |
| I just logged in to check the site quick before heading off to bed. As I scrolled through the Newsfeed, an item caught my eye. Yes, it was the Writing.Com beanie or stocking cap, as we called them growing up. So, before going any further, I had to go shopping and purchase one before they are all gone. If they are as nice as other items I've purchased I already know I'm going to love it. Then, since I did my shopping and spent some gift points, I decided I would head over here and write a short entry. But what to write about. Well, about how I got a nice surprise logging in and finding the beanie, and how nice it was not to have to go get my billfold to purchase it. Yes, I purchased a Writing.Com beanie with Writing.Com gift points. Points earned by doing the things I enjoy and why I'm a member anyway. Well, some are earned, but just as many are gifted for various reasons by various people around the site. I would also like to add that a few months back, when things were pretty tight for us here, I was about to expire my premium membership and did not have the means to pay at the time. Again, the gift points saved the day and purchased enough of an extension to hold me over until I could afford to pay my annual membership. I've been wanting a sweatshirt, or hoodie, as they call them now; I'm old school, remember. That's next on my list, along with more gift points. With this being such a wonderful place, I'm happy to make a few purchases when I can to help support the site and make it possible for the founders to continue this wonderful place. |
| Wow, I'm actually writing this before midnight, well my time anyway. I should have had this done already and been snuggled into bed if not sleeping, but my youngest daughter is having trouble falling asleep tonight. One of the problems is she slept too late this morning, which is my fault for not waking her sooner. But, since she was up late last night with cramping I just didn't have the heart to wake her up. I also think her anxieties are up with Thanksgiving this week. Most kids would be looking forward to the break, but she loves school and would never miss if she had her way. Also, our school is shutting down for an extended holiday break and won't reopen until after the new year. That means distance learning and her not being able to visit with friends. None of her friends live close, so school is their main point of interactions, and that's going to be difficult for her. Hell, it's going to be difficult for all of us. Once again, we are not sure of my wife's work hours, since she also works at the school. They are keeping K through third grade open, so hopefully she will not lose any hours. But, with the middle school and high school closed, they aren't going to need the entire custodial team, and that's where we aren't sure about how many hours, if any, she will get cut. All of this is a result of the pandemic going on strong, or at least as strong as it's been since it hit. Our local numbers are higher, but then again, they are testing more people more often, and many of the ones testing positive aren't even getting sick. I personally haven't seen anything change much at all. The testing increases and so do the numbers. It's never really dropped much, but they say we are in our second wave now. I haven't seen the end of the first wave. For now, all we can do is hope and pray. Maybe one of these days the numbers will start dropping and continue to drop as more and more people become more resistant. The other hope is better treatment for those infected, and a vaccine to help prevent catching the pesky bug. I'm thinking it's going to take all three to put a stop to the pandemic. In the meantime, we continue on as normal as we can. No, I don't like to wear the mask and I and my family aren't really worried about catching the bug. Hell, as far as we know, we all had it right after it first hit, but we have no way to know for sure. My family and I continue to live as we always have, we shake hands and share hugs, we don't shy away from anyone who isn't wearing a mask, and do our best not to let this virus change the way we live. However, we also respect those who are afraid of catching it, we respect their right to be out and about without fear, so we wear our masks for them, sanitize our hands in the stores, and do our best to let them live according to their beliefs and concerns. We are all in this together, and together we all wait for the day the numbers drop and life returns to normal. |
| Once again my blog entry falls after the midnight hour. Even so, this is Fridays entry. I would have made it in time, if not for my youngest granddaughter who was suffering some cramps and unable to fall to sleep tonight. She was tired, but with the cramping, she fought going to bed and going to sleep. Instead she spent some time on my lap, as long as she could, anyway, she's almost as tall as me and I'm sure she wasn't comfortable. Even so, it brought her comfort and I am not about to turn her away, it will be soon enough and I'll be looking back and wishing she would come sit on my lap for a spell again. Once she became too uncomfortable, she retired to Grandma's rocker, and tried to curl up in that, but again, she has grown too big and the chair was just too small. I was finally able to convince her that maybe, if she got a good night sleep, tomorrow would have her feeling better. Of course, she still fought going to sleep. She has almost nightly since we took her in and eventually adopted her. We still do not know why she fights going to sleep, but we have learned to accept it and have found ways to get her to try and go to sleep. Tonight, like most nights, once she committed to lying down and closing her eyes, she was out in minutes, Of course, she's sleeping soundly on the living room floor where she could stay close. I just covered her up and hope she sleeps well, with lots of sweet dreams, then wakes rested and cramp free in the morning. |
| Another entry posted a bit late, just after midnight; it suppose to be Friday the 20ths entry. Things seem to be more normal, if there is such a thing around her anymore. My wife worked days again, but then also had to work most of the afternoon shift as well, so she didn't get home until late. Both girls seemed to be in pretty good moods and we had no problems. They headed off to bed around ten, the youngest one wanting to read for a while. My wife and I sat up and had a couple of mixed drinks and relaxed until just a short time ago. Now she is tucked into bed and most likely dozing off, while I spend a little time in here, posting to my blog. I'll be off to bed next, and sleeping in minutes. I'm extremely tired tonight, since I have been short on sleep most of the week. But, no alarms tomorrow, so we can all sleep in. I'm hoping for a good night sleep and waking tomorrow feeling rested and renewed. It's been a hell of a week, but it's coming to an end. Of course, next week we have Thanksgiving, so the school will shut down for the holiday and not reopen until after the new year, so my days of quiet and peacefulness will be gone for a spell. It's going to be difficult for the girls with the distance learning until school reopens, but I'll remain hopeful that it will pass quickly. |
| Second entry for the day, however the first one was posted for yesterday but submitted after midnight. So, this is actually today's entry, after which, I'm thinking it's time for bed. My topic tonight is kind of a rant, but if you happen to read this and have any advice, I'll gladly listen, err read it, that is. Yesterday we had a bit of a blow up with our younger daughter shortly before bed, and by the time things de-escalated it was past eleven. Since she has some issues from her past, she's adopted, I knew she may not sleep well, or even be back up, so I gave her till after midnight and then checked in on her. She was sleeping, but very restless. I was late getting in here as a result, and late getting to bed; I crawled in a little after three this morning. I get her and her sister up for school so the alarm sounded at six-twenty five after a bit of a restless night myself. She has been doing pretty well, in general, but if things are getting to her, she escalates quickly and her defiance flares. Over the last couple weeks, it's been kind of hit and miss with her, but in general we have kept things manageable. I know part of her problem is change, she does not deal well with any change, and big ones can really mess her up. The big change a week ago was my wife getting moved from nights to days. Week nights it's just me and the girls, and we have our routine pretty well set. But now, my wife, the girls grandma, is home shortly after they get home from school. It's been a difficult transition for both girls, my wife, and somewhat for myself. Another pending change is the school, which is in a hybrid mode, is closing up at the end of the month until after New Years. It's an extended Christmas vacation with some distance learning involved, and neither of the girls are looking forward to it. The younger, however, is most distraught because she will be separated from her friends and really loves school. The biggest problem, however, is with one of her instructors. Since she has some learning challenges and an IEP, she goes to school all week. If she was in full stream classes full time, she would do distance learning on Monday and Tuesday, have Wednesday as catch up day, then attend regular classes on Thursday and Friday. Instead, she attends advisory class on Monday through Wednesday so she can get extra help. Things were working fine until she was having a bad day and things escalated and she ended up with a day of in-school suspension. She wasn't happy, but took the consequences and then moved on. Her advisory teacher's para, however seems to be knit picking over little things that were never a problem before. Most of the stuff going on is all blown out of proportion, like her spending time on her phone or chatting on her school tablet with a friend while they work on homework together. She is getting A's and B's, but they continue to say she's not doing any work. Worst of all, they don't address it to her more than to mention it. After which, my daughter tells them they can look to see that she's working with her friend on homework, or she's done already. To make it even worse, instead of handling the situation right then and there, the advisory teacher will email me and tell me what's going on, then want me to talk to my daughter about it after school. Since it usually comes up in the mornings, it's hours after the fact, and not really my problem anyway. I addressed this issue to the advisory teacher and told her flat out, if you want to gain any respect from this girl, you have to enforce the rules and policies, not email me to tattle on her and get her into trouble at home. But, it has done no good, and I do talk to her after school and try and be open and trusting. She has not shown me she is behind in anything and I have no reason not to believe her . But, the damage is still done. She attends school all day and then comes home to be lectured on things that happened hours before. It's got her on edge, and it's not doing any good; it may be doing more damage. I've decided I'm not going to address anything school related with her unless it's something serious, that will take a lot of pressure off my daughter. But, the emails will still continue to flow in, sometimes three or four a day. Do I reverse the situation and replay back about little issues going on at home and ask the teacher to talk to her about it the next day? I doubt she would get the hint. I even thought about acting like I take her numerous daily emails as flirting and make a pass at her, maybe then she will back off? I just don't know. I mean after coming right out and telling her face to face, she needs to impose the school and class rules at the time, not email them to me, I wonder if anything will get through to her. Do you think if I attach a scantily clad, provocative photo of myself she'll stop? |
| Since I've been doing so well at getting in here and writing a bit these past few days, I thought I would get a short entry in yet tonight. However, it's not going to show up as being written tonight since it's already the next morning. Confusing, right? Here's a little simpler explanation, I wanted to make an entry on Wednesday, but by the time I got in here, it's 1:22 Thursday morning. I would have made it if things hadn't gone bat-s***-crazy this evening. That' the problem, you see. Things finally get settled down and I find myself with time to enjoy in here, usually after everyone is asleep. But, child problems flared this evening, an by the time things had settled, the smoke had cleared, and I had everyone off to bed, it was pushing midnight. Sure, I suppose I could have done a quick entry, but I was stressed and would not have been able to focus. Instead I did some research and checked things out so we can get this problem taken care of; I hope we can get it settled and come to terms we can all accept. Lets see, anything else worth writing about? Yes, I did have a productive day, not writing productive, but productive just the same. My wife's new phone arrived today, so we got her all set up and ready to go. She's not the most tech savvy, but she did pretty good. The hard part for her is going to be figuring out how everything works on her new phone, it's a lot different than her old one. Another task I set out to do today was some baking. No, I didn't get baked, I did some baking; food items, in the oven. See, I like rye bread; I know it's not for everyone, but I like it. The problem is, I'm the only one in the house that does. So, if I purchase a loaf, I have to eat way more than I want, faster than I would like, to keep it from going bad. Also, the stores in our area do not carry a selection of rye bread, no they are doing well to have one kind available. I also think they do not sell much of it, so I have to get what ever kind they have, usually not the best kind, and it's often old by the time I get it. In fact, the last loaf was dry and the crust was so tough I had trouble biting through it. I'm sure it's also packed with way too many preservatives for as long is it has for a sell by date. Anyway, I'm kind of rambling on now, another problem of staying up and writing too late. So, the last time I went shopping, I picked up the items I needed to make my own rye bread. Today, I had the time so I set about creating two loaves of fresh baked and so much better than store bought rye bread, that my wife even liked it. Both daughters tried it, one was disgusted, the other said she would eat it if she had too, but it wasn't her first choice for bread. Well, that's enough for tonight. Sleep well. |
| It's kind of scary, isn't it? What's kind of scary. you ask. Me writing in my blog again. I have written in here more in the last four days than in the last year! I know it's a good thing, since this is supposed to be kind of a daily, or at least a couple times a week, type activity. Part of the change is time, I'm finding I have a bit again. My wife just switched over to day shift last week, and will remain until at least after Thanksgiving, possibly longer. So, we enjoy dinner together as a family, then some television and soon enough everyone is off to bed. This gives me a little time in the evening, most nights anyway, to be alone with my thoughts, It also gives me all day, from seven-thirty until about three-thirty, with no one home besides me and Hannah, our dog. So, most days I have time to get my stuff done, get online, etc. By bedtime, I'm ready to relax after getting everyone tucked in, spend a little time here, and when moved to do so, write in my blog. I would even have some time during the day to write, but so far I've been fairly busy, and since I don't like to write when I know I'll be interrupted, I choose to wait until night. If you head my previous entry, you know my computer crashed; my fourteen month old computer that just went off warranty. Luckily, I purchased an extended warranty so I'm still covered, just need to find time and have the means to take it in for repairs. In the mean time, I dug my old laptop out and tried to use it. The battery was shot and it was not only slow, but froze up quite often and had many other issues. I'm not sure, I think about fifteen years old, it came with Windows 7, a brand new operating system when I got it. Anyway, it did not work so I needed something more than my phone to get online with. I installed a very small Linux package and tried that, but somehow messed things up trying to figure it out. I needed more, and something a bit easier to interface with, so I went with a medium size Linux OS. That worked pretty well, but again, I had some issues trying to set up my printer and scanner. It also was a bit limited, and since I want to continue to use my laptop even after I get my other computer fixed, I decided to go full out and install a full size Linux OS. I also ordered a new battery and worked on getting everything set up today. It works great! It's similar to Windows, enough I can find my way, and it's easy to install new programs and add-ons. They say the third times a charm, and so it is; I have a usable laptop again. I haven't tried out the office suite yet, but it's compatible with Microsoft, so I don't see any issues. It may take a little bit to figure everything out, but that's not really any different than getting a new phone or new computer; I guess I kind of did. |
| Okay, new things have come to light. Well not so much light, kind of dark actually. Alright, not really dark, either, just kind of bad luck. See, about fourteen months ago I needed to get a new computer, this old laptop I'm now using and was using back then, just didn't cut it anymore. It was not only slow, but it was so out of memory it just barely functioned. I found a nice desktop computer and purchased it. For just over a year I was in digital bliss, but then a week ago, I started up my computer and discovered that Windows would not load.I tried the repair and recovery options, I even tried to start anew, but nothing would work. Luckily, I had also purchased an extended warranty, but since we moved, I have quite a drive to take the computer in for repairs; hopefully this week. That left me without a computer and the only way to get online and in here was through my phone. It works, but it's not really the best way to go. I needed a different computer. I still had this old laptop, originally with Windows 7, but upgraded some years back to Windows 10. I dug it out of the closet and fired it up, but the battery was shot and it just wasn't able to perform to even simple needs. I had played around a bit, many years ago, with Linux. I wasn't really good with it, but managed to figure it out enough to play around with it as kind of a hobby. I figured Linux had evolved over the years and looked into putting it on this old compute. Since it's such an old laptop, I wanted a lite install, but still something that would meet my needs. Linux Mint sounded good, but after installing it, i found I needed to add a few tweaks and adjustments to get what I needed. In the process, I messed something up and was looking at needing to reinstall it. Instead I upgraded to Linux Lite and am currently using it. I'm thinking of maybe going with a more complete operating system, since this works very well, but then, do I really need anything more? I mean, I will have my desktop back soon enough, so I don't really need much on this old laptop. I also purchased a new battery for about fifteen bucks, so in the process of getting my new computer repaired, I found I still have a usable laptop for my writing. |
| It's been 6 months since I wrote in here, way too long. My last entry was under quarantine and just at the tail end of all hell breaking loose, or so we thought. As it turned out, even as one crisis calmed, another flared. With our credit in shambles, we found hours cut do to the pandemic and a big reduction in income. Civil unrest was growing around us, and our problem child was still creating a lot of headaches and problems for us, even though she was temporarily placed outside the home. With our income lower, we couldn't maintain our lease for long, so it was time to find a new place to live. We had been wanting to relocate a bit further out of the city, but with the stay at home orders, it wasn't looking like things were going to work out. That and we were very short on funds and still locked into a lease until July. However, shortly after my last post, we found a nice little place out in the country, but much further than we had planned on moving. We talked to the owners, they wanted us to come look at the place and meet us. It was about a three hour drive, but a nice day when we met them and looked the place over. Being down to one daughter still in the home, a two bedroom duplex was fine. It meant downsizing a lot, but the location was good. Our daughter fell in love with the place at first site, and within a few days we had a one year lease. It meant going a bit further in debt to make the new payment while finishing the old lease, but it gave us time to move, clean the apartment, and get organized a bit. Well, that was the plan. Two weeks after we closed the lease deal, we had enough stuff moved to stay here between trips to move more, but kept enough at the old place to stay overnight there, as well, since it was almost three hours each way. About halfway through our carefully planned and organized move, some rioting broke out too close to our old apartment, right across the road from the complex. We decided it was time to get the hell out of Dodge once and for all. Three days straight we spent running back and forth to haul items and clean. We had to rent another storage unit here to pack stuff into until we could sort it. Again, even more financial set back, but we talked to the credit union and explained the situation. Even with our dropped credit score, they approved us a personal line of credit and upped our credit card limit. Of course, this helped but at the same time, made things more difficult. But, with careful budgeting and planning, we managed to utilize the credit without letting it bleed us dry. Of course, it took time to find work in the new area to get some income flowing back in, but work was found and now things are holding pretty good. Of course, skimping and holding off on so many things over the summer kind of hit us this fall, new tires for the pickup and the car was quite an expense. The plan was to get the truck tires first, they were the worst, but the car decided it wasn't going to go any more without new tires and left us stranded on the side of the road with two blown front tires. They still had a bit of tread, but the belts had let loose and we lost one tire, put on the spare, then lost the other about fifty miles from home; towing charges are crazy! Anyway, both daughters are home and it's been quite a stressful reunion with the younger daughter, but so far things are going pretty good. We are cramped on room, and since the second daughter returned we had to split our big bedroom into two smaller rooms to accommodate her, but it's working. Crowded as it gets at times, we all love the area we live in; it's a rural area, but close enough to town for all our needs. In fact, even being crowded like we are, we are all wanting to renew the lease next spring. That's enough catching up for now, I need to refrain from writing too much or I won't have anything to write about after the next six months passes! |
| We have a good start into May and things are beginning to look a little better for us. We are extended under the stay at home orders, which I don't agree with, I think enforced social distancing would be enough, I'll even wear a mask out in public, but having to stay inside only creates stress and more problems on top of everything else. I'm not going to voice any opinions or thoughts on the pandemic except to say, I hope I never see another virus outbreak during an election year. We have had our own disaster during these difficult times and it's been hard on everyone. In 2017 we literally ended our lives and started over again so we could foster our three grand children who had lived in abuse and then into the foster system for years. because the abuse was family, it was complicated, but the children were worth everything we had to do and everything we had to give up. Three children, three grandchildren to be specific, the oldest, we'll call her Ann, the middle boy, John, and the youngest, Cathy. We had to take Cathy in right away because of some problems she had and no place to go. We were still learning about all of the fostering stuff and all of her problems; it was tough sometimes, but she stole my heart right off. Then the oldest girl started visiting on weekends and holidays, but it took months to get her placed in our care. At the time, we were foster parents, but our hearts were set to adopt and be a real family. The middle child had many issues, and after a heart breaking realization, we had to accept that we did not have what he needed and it would not work for him and his sisters to live under the same roof. We had one of the girls already living with us, the next was slated to move in after the new year, 2018, and he was a threat to their well being and safety. We had to do what was best for everyone and admit we could not reach him, and he was not good for his sisters. He went back into the system, although we continued to have contact with him and prayed for him to get a family that was right for him. Meanwhile, the youngest was about to be adopted, but her sister wasn't sure yet and old enough to have to decide for herself. It was a tough couple of months for both the girls, who were now both living with us full time. They had been in the system for years by this time and had been in homes together and individually, all saying they would adopt and all giving up on them at the last minute. We had a huge explosion shortly before the finalization for Cathy. But, it changed nothing and last fall she officially became our daughter. It took a few days to sink in, but she finally realized she had a real family again. In fact, we were out camping and my wife and Ann were out in front on a trail we were hiking, Cathy was about ten feet behind them taking in the beauty around us, and I was about five feet behind her with our family dog. Cathy was looking at wild flowers as she walked, the suddenly started to skip and exclaimed, "I have a family! A real family" With the youngest girl adopted, the oldest, Ann, realized this wasn't a repeat of the many foster homes she had been in and wanted to get adopted to. We filed and soon had a date set for just after the new year started. Both girls got very excited as the day came closer, and we thought some of the problems with Cathy were a result of this, but come to find out, more was going on than we knew. Ann was adopted at the end of January, and things kind of went to hell after that with Cathy. A new girl had move into the area and was in her class, and trouble soon started at school. Even as we tried to get this under control, we started to have Cathy withdraw from us at home. Ann was indifferent and was struggling with the adoption, so we had our hands full. Both girls thought that since they were now adopted, they could run free and we had nothing but trouble. Most of the time they worked in shifts, one being good while the other went into trouble. We worked with therapists and did our best to get things back under control. By February, Ann was starting to adjust to all the new ideas of family and had really settled in, but still did not feel comfortable with a family setting. We were working with a family therapist every other week, but soon realized that Cathy was being more withdrawn and pulling away from family, even as her sister Ann was joining in.' Through the school, we knew that Cathy and her new friend were nothing but trouble, and we did our best to keep them apart as did the school. But they managed to keep in contact and things got worse. Then Corvid-19 hit and so did the crap right into the fan. Cathy was very social and started blaming me for not being able to go to school, to her friends, etc. A pandemic was new to her and she could not understand. Both sisters had friends in the same complex we live in and would have time to visit back and forth. We were all good with it until Cathy went off the deep end. She wasn't supervised as much as we were lead to believe at her friends and had used this other friend as a means of getting in contact with the bad friend from school. they soon devised a plan. Cathy came home from her friends, but that night, she ran. We found her by the next morning, at her friends home but she refuse to come home. Police were called in, but she still refused to come home. With the pandemic, things soon became all messed up and soon she was in the psych ward. There, she decided to claim abuse in the home, wanting to be brought back to the friends home. When that didn't work, she admitted she had made it all up to be with her friend. She was back home in a week, and everything seemed to be getting back to a normal. Even Ann changed and seemed to finally understand that she had a forever family that loved her and she didn't have to worry about losing them. Her younger sister, however, soon discovered she could stay in contact with her bad friend through the distance learning. Shortly after she found this out, we also found out through the school. things were changed and they could not message back an forth and again, she was mad and blamed me for not letting her have her friend. A couple weeks ago she ran again. This time she was working with her friend and had taken my billfold when she left. The best we know, they were going to meet up, but needed to get certain things before hand, including cell phones. We soon had a runaway, as well as stolen debit and credit cards. But, as the charges came in, we could track her and soon she was in custody of the police. Her last text before she was "busted" was to her friend, but accidentally went to her sister. It read, "The po-po found me and I'm busted, don't let them get you." she had been found behind a store burning receipts and packaging so nothing could get returned. The police took her down for some questioning and then were going to bring her home. She didn't want to come home and refused to cooperate. Then she claimed she was raped by me, numerous times. Social services had to be called in and everything went straight to hell for our family. Even though the replay on her phone, from her friend was instructing her to cry rape, it had to be investigated. I agree, anytime a child says she has been sexually abused, it needs to be investigated. I knew I was innocent, but it was going to take time to prove it. Meanwhile, she was place outside the home, just what she wanted. The county also was going to take her sister out of the home until it went through court. Che came forward and told the investigators that if she was removed she would run away to come back home to us. The next thing was I needed to leave the home then so she was safe. She insisted on coming with me. It took a few days but eventually the county let me stay home based on what the investigation was showing and what the older sister was stating as it being a safe and loving home. We complied with everything the investigators wanted and since we had been informed by the adoption agency that it's smart to put in security cameras except in the girls rooms and bathrooms just in case something like this came up, and had listened, we soon had more than enough evidence to get everything dropped. That was last week. But, now Cathy knows she has to face up to her lies and all the damage she caused by taking my billfold and spending money with e debit and credit cards, she is refusing to return home. Because of her age, she is just under the states accountably age, we are just out the money and wit the false accusations, she is feeling guilty and knows there are going to be consequences. She tried to play the social worker, but got caught contacting the friend who was also busted in this run-a-way scheme, so she really got herself jammed up. Now, today, we signed some forms to have her evaluated by a new psych hospital. She is being transferred to a home for troubled girls and will soon be working with psychiatrists. Not what she wanted, but what she needed. As for us? We are still recovering from the damage she caused. We are out a lot of money and cannot return the items because they were opened and we have Covid-19. We also have legal fees and other damages due to all of this. Ann finally broke down and cried over her sister not being her with us and her almost losing her new home because of everything. We are trying to get used to not having Cathy here with us, and undoing as much of the damage she did as we can. We don't even want to live here anymore because of everything that has taken place. Today, finally, things are beginning to straighten out. It cost us a lot in money and we dropped a lot in our credit score as a result, but we have everything balance. Hopefully, in a few moths, we can begin to recover, although our credit score, from reporting stolen credit and debit cards, as well as the overdrafts and fees we are finally getting removed, will be barely into the fair area for a few years. Who would have thought this is what the new year was bringing! |
| It's been over a month and so much has happened. We still have Covid-19 messing up our spring, of course, and are now going on six weeks of staying at home. I can't say it seems to be helping, our states numbers have been in triple digits for a week now, but there's no way to know what it would be without staying home. I tend to think it would be the same. Of course, that's with social distancing everyplace and everyone cooperating with maintaining distance, restricting travel, and revamping every business to provide the means to social distance. I'm sure it would work just as good, but how to impliment it is the big question and I have no better answers than anyone else. I guess it's take a number and wait in the car and wait till your number is anounced over a speaker, the radio, or perhaps displayed at various places in the parking lot. Anyway, we have plenty of people trying to figure this out and my family is having enough trouble just getting through this period of history. It's been terrible for us without anyone getting sick, that we know of. We did all have a turn at some kind of stomach virus but we do not have any idea what it was. I'm kind of hoping the test to see who's been sick and who hasn't becomes available soon. But even if the pandemic ended in a week, I'm afraid the devestation within my family would not recover. It may get better, it may not, but after all that's happened in the last six weeks, I know things will never be the same for us again. Right now, there is still too much happening with everything, emotions are almost out of control at times, and there is no clear vision of how it will all turn out, so I don't want to go into details. Besides, I'm having great difficulty with my anxiety and am so filled with sorrow that I doubt I could go into any detail without having to stop. I tried to write a bit yesterday, and couldn't; today I have this much... I guess that means that we are moving forword a little. |
| I know, it's officially named Covid-19 but that's so labratorish (my term) and boring! Besides, what about West Nile Virus, Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever, Middle East Respiratory Syndrome (MERS), German Measles, and Legionnaire’s Disease, just to name a few? I say, to hell with politically correct, and back to the basics of freedom of speech! But, that's not how things work in this point in history, is it? I mean, look at the panic we are seeing over this pandemic, which statistically is very close to the annual influenza season and it's not like our nation has never seen a pandemic before. In 1916, over 7,000 deaths occurred and 27,363 cases were reported of polio (infantile paralysis) in America's worst polio epidemic. Again in 1949, 2,720 deaths occurred from polio from 42,173 reported cases. Finally in 1952 polio killed 3,300 out of 57,628 cases reported. 1918, nationwide, Spanish Flu killed over 500,000 in the worst U.S epidemic; in 1957 an Asian Flu outbreak killed 70,000. Between 1981 and 2005 the CDC estimated U.S. Aids cases over 988,300 with a total fatality of just over 550,000. More recently, in 2009, H1N1, or the Swine Flu quickly spread to more than 70 countries and between April and October, 22,000,000 (yes million) Americans had contacted the virus. 98,000 required hospitalization and about 4,000 Americans died as a result of H1N1. As you can see, we have weathered similar storms in our past, some not to far back. So what's changed? Why is there so much panic this time? I suspect that we are seeing more panic as a result of being better connected in this day and age. Sad, our technology and ability to communicate information quicker should help reduce panic, not increase it. But, then look at how the masses react to information; When Trump won the election our nation almost shut down simply because Hilary lost! Face it, we can't speak our minds without hurting someones feelings, we can't openly practice our religious beliefs without hurting someones feelings. I would like to add here that the first thing that comes to mind is "Merry Christmas" but just this past summer someone let a dog into a local mosque because they felt threatened. So, lets be clear, it applies to everyone! Just this past summer, while taking my family out to a Bonanza Steak House, I heard a person comment as they passed our table, "Look at those savages eating meat! It should be outlawed." Not an exact quote, but close enough. I wanted to reply, "I'm sorry eating steak at a steakhouse offends you. I would prefer to eat totally vegetarian, but the law forbids cannibalism. Besides, I'm on a low fat diet and you, my dear, do not even qualify t be rated 75% lean!" But I held my tongue and said nothing, although I did wonder why she would en enter a steakhouse. I hope, and pray this will soon be under control, that the general public will get tired of the restrictions, the empty shelves, and the B-S. But, it is an election year so who knows? I wonder, could that be why things are as they are? Would our politicians use something like this to try and win votes? I think we are on to something here.... |
| I received a postcard a couple days back from WdC! I've received quite a few things from them over the years and I find it very hart warming. I don't know of any other sites that actually send a member things for birthdays, holidays, and anniversaries. It's one of may things I love about the site. This time it's a simple reminder to log in everyday, something I really need to do. But, to actually send me something to remind me seems so wonderful; it cost money for postcards and it cost money for postage. I have a purchased membership, so there are no adds paying them for me to be here, just what I spend to maintain my membership, which is months away yet. No, it's not about money, it's about caring and that's wonderful. So, why don't I log in more often? I mean, I love it here when I can interact with others, write, read, review, and interact in onsite activities. Well, normally I love all these things, but lately it's gotten to be frustrating. Not the site, or anything to do with the site; no, this is my life that has gotten complicated and frustrating, and it seems all but out of my control. If I can log in and relax, engage, and enjoy, I would be here as much as possible. But, with interruptions, and all the hassles that seem to keep interfering with my life, it's difficult to try and set a time up when I can log in. The more I try to overcome these, the more they seem to increase and disrupt, until I've finally reached a place where I just try and avoid them. That means I avoid doing the things I love because it has become too difficult for me to engage in them. Even today, I suffer again at the same problems. I need to do some shopping, but I don't have control over the finances, my wife does. She knew I needed to shop for some items and even added her input into the list of things I need to get, but she did not give me a dollar amount I can safely spend without risking spending too much. Why? She didn't get around to figuring up the checkbook yet. So, now I'm sitting here, frustrated and kind of stuck. Both girls are at friends for part of the day, so it's a great time for me to get out and get away from things for awhile. It's a good time for me to get away from the stress and frustrations of being stuck in the apartment but I don't know how much, if any, money is available. I also do not know when the girls are going to be coming home and again, do not have any way of finding out. They have my wife's phone number and will not answer if I call, even though I have been trying to get my number added. Like the check book, it gets pushed back and I sit and wait. Once the girls are home, it get's stressful. They have been adopted out of the foster care system and both have issues. They cannot be left unattended, and I never know when one, the other, or both will get triggered and problems arise. I can take them with, but it prevents me from being able to relax and more often than not, gets stressful and difficult shopping with them. I feel like I'm going this alone, trying to keep everything working correctly and smoothly, but instead of getting the resources and support, I get nothing but more stress and pushed off until later; a later that never comes. I try! I talk and point out things, I am willing to jump in whenever needed, and I work with everyone involved, but I don't get any cooperation back. I hear the same response over and over, I have to (fill in the blank) ____________ right now and don't have time. So, I sit and wait, and wait, and wait. Then, when I get tired of waiting an decide it's time to do something for me, to get out of the home, to get de-stressed, and take some time for myself, I have to put my plans on hold because now I have to do what I had to put off days back. I feel trapped! Trapped by the person who I used to turn to for support and who used to work by my side. |
| Another month gone and still not much for activity here, or anyplace in WdC for that matter. Winter blues may be a part of it, but it's also so much going on. Even as I think I have one thing taken care of, something else comes up. A lot of it has to do with the two girls we fostered and adopted. Leading up to the adoption was pretty hectic, and I really thought after would settle right down. Boy was I wrong! First of all, both girls started getting worked up more and more as the day approached. I antisipated the older girl winding up, since she was the one getting adopted; her younger sister was adopted a few months back and had settled in pretty well. This was why I thought the older girl would do the same, get wound up and need lots of attention until after the court date, then settle in like her sister had done. But, both girls wound up, more and more as it got closer. Finally the big day was here and we headed to court. We were set to be there at 9:30 and would have this all done by 10:00. But, we got pushed back until almost noon. More anxiety and then finally, in a few minutes, everything was over. They were both still wound pretty high, but seemed to have a handle on it. We went out to eat to celebrate, then headed to some relatives to complete he day. After visiting, we took off for home kind and arrived kind of late. We had stopped for dinner on the way, and both girls had fallen asleep on the drive home after. Once home we got them inside, ready for bed and shortly after they were sound asleep. But, they didn't sleep well, both having bad dreams during the night. The following day they were both distant, but got off to school alright. We had therapy set up for both of them, thinking it would help settle them and get things back to normal. But, neither of them was ready when we stopped to pick them up from school. It was three weeks before we could get them to back to therapy! They both also started having other problems. The oldest was demanding all my time, the younger getting into trouble at school and just pulling away from us at home. As soon as I managed any improvements with the younger, the older would get into trouble, and so it would go, back and forth. The oldest also got sick and missed a week of school, so no breaks there. It's gone like that for the last five weeks, and still going. My wife and I managed to get our younger girl to open up a bit and now she is clinging tight. She had a lot of issues when she moved in and soon attached to me as her life-line, so I'm used to her being clingy, but she is clinging even more now that her sister is also trying to monopolize all my time and attention. My wife works, so she is not here with them as much, but she does a lot to help out. Since they had problems with women, especially any with authority, it only made sense that she would work and I would stay home with them until such a time as they are able to be home unsupervised. I just needed to add that, so anyone reading this wouldn't think my wife is not supportive or helpful. Anyway, I thought over the weekend things had begun to settle down a bit, but yesterday we left the older sister with relatives for a couple hours while we attended the younger girls school conferences. By the time we returned, the older sister had managed to get herself into trouble again. It's how it is right now and I don't know how to overcome this, except for time. No matter who gets the attention, the other will get into trouble to take it away; I do my best to spend equal time and attention with them both, separate and together, but right now, that's not good enough for them. I'm getting tired and it's taking all of my attention and wits to deal with them, so not much time for anything else. Hopefully it all starts to work itself out. |
| Someone left the door open and all my pet peeves got out; I say, "Who, who... who let the peeves out!" Yes pet peeve; we all have some. One of mine is getting interrupted when I'm reading or writing. Interruptions when I'm concentrating are bad enough, but when it's reading or writing, it's even worse. I like it quiet when I read, so I can focus on the story. The same is true for writing, I loke it quiet so I can focus on the story. In both cases, the story is being played out within my mind, and outside interruptions force me to pause and then try and find the spot I was at. Perhaps you can relate. Currently, we live in an apartment in a fair size city. We moved from a big house in a small town, I'm talking an old farm style house in a community of less than 1000 people. It was quite a change, but we adjusted quickly. We like it here, having just about everything within an hour's drive or less, plenty of choices and a very comfortable apartment. Yes, we lost out on space, but we got use to it. Our heats and garbage is included, which is a big plus, maintenance is quick and efficient, and all the other utilities are reasonable. We rented a garage right off the building we live in and can park inside out of the weather. We rented a second garage for storage, and the two cost about the same as a local storage site. We've been here for over a year and it's become our home and we like it. Then we got new neighbors upstairs who have young children. The people who moved out also had young children, and one was mentally handicapped and got a bit loud at times, but it wasn't a problem at all. The new people, however, do not restrain the children at all and are always stomping around above us. We addressed them and let them know it was creating a lot of noise for us, but they didn't care and it got worse and worse. We eventually went to the landlord with the problem and they also tried to address the people, but it didn't do any good; they just don't care how much noise we have to deal with, and it goes well into the early morning hours. If that isn't enough, the children also love to throw things off the balcony, especially if we are sitting outside. We also addressed this problem wit the parents, but they just replied, "They are children and don't know any better." It's gotten so bad that the police have been called in, but the people above us tell them we are racist and just picking them out because they are immigrants. The police also have informed us there is little they can actually do, to talk to the apartment management because it's a breach of the lease agreement. But, again, racist is hurled back at us, and the managers cannot do much until winter ends because there are young children. They did offer us the chance to move into a top floor apartment and would not charge for the transition over. Even so, we like it on the ground floor, we passed up second and third floor living for this apartment. It's handy for the dog, the kids, and for hauling in items from the car. To move would be us being punished because they cannot comply. As you can see, it's a big peeve and it's really messing things up. I cannot read or write at home because of the noise. Moving is our only option, so to put the peeve back into the barn and keep people from petting it, we are planning on moving when our lease runs out. It's not fair it's not right, but it's the only option that we can see that will be a solution. I mean, even if we had the people upstairs evicted, would we get better people, the same, or possibly worse people above us. We are looking at areas outside the city, maybe an hour or two. We are looking at houses, I don't want another apartment. Finally, there needs to be work available near by, I'm not going to spend half the time I work driving back and forth. I did that once, it was enough. I figure as long as they let the peeve out, it may as well provide us with something better. |
| It's been a few days and I feel great! Why? It's kind of a long story, about a months worth, but don't worry, we can condense this stuff down further than Campbell's soup. I was doing what I had come to think of as average for myself a month ago. I have gained some weight from ending my smoking period, and on top of the excess I already have, was getting way too heavy. Also, my back was hurting, a lot. It's an old injury but as winter arrived it grew worse than ever before. Also, I was tired and feeling run down, kind of in a fog, and just filled with the Blah. Winter blues I thought, and I was doing alright at holding my own against them. Then I stumbled across some information about something called Leaky Gut Syndrome, and it seemed like what I was suffering from. But, the medication was herbal, not much for support form other research, and I was leery, especially at the cost of the herbal medication. Even so, I thought, if it works it will be worth it. I spent a week doing further research on the product, the condition, and the list of ingredients in the medication. I decided to try it, and ordered one months worth for a trial run. A week later and I find out it's going to be a while to fill the order! By this time, I should have had the stuff, and now I find out it hasn't even shipped yet. I was very upset and figured I had fallen for a scam. I wrote a not so nice letter, expecting it to not even be delivered, but it did go through. I do have to say at this point, I did not ever get an actual replay to the letter I wrote, but shortly after I was notified that my order had shipped. a few days ago I received an apology letter and a coupon for 50% off my next order, no limits. I also received my product, last Wednesday. Eager to try it, I started right away on Wednesday and also, on Thursday, decided to make a batch of homemade, from scratch, vegetable beef soup. It was difficult to do much of this kind of thing for me, due to my back hurting so much, but I set myself up with a stool in the kitchen and took frequent breaks as I washed and prepared the vegetables. I had not eaten lunch, so snacking was my plan, since I had lots of yummy vegetables at hand. It all went well, except as I was cleaning, and snacking on some broccoli, I discovered a bit of dark coloring within the plant stem and into the florets. Barely noticeable, but it was there, so I discarded it, but not before I had snacked on some of it. I didn't think much about it, since it taste fine and it wasn't really anything except discolored. In fact, I almost used it in the soup, but decided at the last minute not to. The soup was terrific, the whole family enjoyed it, an everyone did fine, but me. By the time dinner was over, I was in extreme stomach pain! I took Pepto-Bismo to help with the pain, as well as Tylenol, and it helped, but not much. By 8:00 pm, I was becoming feverish and I retired to bed. I did not get over the fevers and pain, which by later that night had extended to full body pain in all my joints, my entire abdomen, and an extreme headache until Tuesday morning, when I woke finally feeling better. Better, but so week I could not even open a bottle of Pepsi, or walk across the apartment without having to stop and rest. The fever had finally stopped, the aches and pain had all diminished, but there were flare ups and like I said, a lot of weakness. It took another two days to regain my strength and fully recover. I would have to say I had some kind of food poisoning, and I'm just thankful that I didn't end up in the hospital. Tuesday, feeling better, I returned to my bottle of herbal medication, thinking that it may also help with the recovery and healing, since it was for stomach/digestive issues. Wednesday I continued with no real changes except for being a bit stronger and more rested. Thursday I was no longer ill and that's when I noticed I had not only regained my strength, but I had more energy than I've had in a long time. Also, my back seemed to be less sore. This morning, and through the morning, I have been feeling better than I have for years! My back pain is all but gone, I have a lot more energy, my thinking/concentration is clear, and even my mood is better. Many of my symptoms, including the increased back pain were stated in the advertisement as possible side effects of Leaky Gut Syndrome. I have also had problems with elevated white blood cells with no reason, immune problems, and stomach and digestive issues for about seven years now. I have seen doctors over the years and never found any cause, just treatments for the symptoms I was suffering. Recently, I was told that I may have West Nile Virus, since I was bitten years back by a deer tick and the condition was verified at the time. I had also gotten shots and antibiotics, but I was told they do not always stop the infection. But now, I'm a believer that it was all side-effects of the stomach/digestive issues I've been plagued with over the last seven years; I also believe that Leaky Gut Syndrome was the culprit. I'm excited, yet still giving myself time to see if this continues or if it's short lived; I am hopeful, however, that it will not only continue, but even increase as I continue to take the supplements over the next month. If your interested in knowing more about Leaky Gut Syndrome or the medication I found to treat it, please write and I'll share the information I found. I'm also thinking about switching to a different supplement after this is done and see if the lower cost one does as well. If it does, great, but if it doesn't I'll be switching back to the current one. It's a bit expensive, but if it works and I can feel this good all the time, it's a small price to pay. |
 Log in to Leave Feedback |
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
