One man's journey to find the way home
I am an American Baptist ordained minister. I began my life journey in Massachusetts, where I was called to help people understand what it meant to know a loving God. The call came during a time when I was wrestling with how to help my brother Kurt, who was diagnosed with Schizophrenia during my high school years. I was a new Christian by my senior year following trying to understand what it meant for me to care about a person like my brother who others tended to stay away from. |
After twenty three years in Massachusetts, God sent me to the land of Kansas City where I spent about 35 years of my life. I was a pastor, a resident chaplain, a supervisor in training and most recently a caregiver and security. Everything I have done vocationally has been with God in mind. That does not mean that I am totally comfortable with all the movings of the Spirit.
I am now in Erie where I do not know very many people. I came here because of my wife. She is from Erie and coming here was the right thing to do. It just plain made sense. My kids had grown up. I did not like Kansas city in terms of climate and was looking forward to a change. I had become very frustrated vocationally and longed to come to Erie to get a second opinion, because I honestly believed that was what God had wanted for me. I left behind kids and grandkids who I loved!!!! I had two jobs that I enjoyed. They were both very appreciative of my skills and I was making more money with the two jobs than I ever had. I heard more than once. ARE YOU CRAZY?
Well I can only say that I am in love with God's leading. I am starting all over again. It has not been easy. Maybe some of you can offer me some words of support. I am lonely despite the fact my wife is with me. She battles depression and has two siblings that are having similar battles. When it is all said I am in a depressed community with a depressed wife and her family. So I begin the conversation....
|The memories are there. I have so many memories about being called to lay down or fight. I recall time at St. Luke's. You make mistakes and wonder if person's will let their knee off your neck. Then I go forward a loner, unsure that even my best can be good enough. Time will tell
|Before I answer that question, let .e consider my body is a map displaying trauma both visible and invisible. By the grace of God my suffering is a gift. The same suffering Jesus used to redeem and give hope is suffering that lead others to a better place. The temptation is to take away suffering. Jesus did not do that. We were shown how to use it to the glory of God.
|Sleep is fleeting. There is so much to do and little time to do it. Christmas depresses as more and more die. A vaccine is on the horizon and yet we are faced with the cure being as dangerous as the cure. Where is faith if it does not lead us to a better appreciation of God and other people.
|I hope to have priorities. I pray I will mail my cards pronto. I hope to get addresses soon enough. It was a cryptic day. I get a call from sis I could get some money and yet not till after Christmas. I am worn out with expectations
Goals for day:
1. Get ready for virtual party sooner than later.
2. Write something
3. Call the 401k place
4. Walk and walk
5 take care of wife
6. Look in storage, organize or get stuff out
8. How do I get to airport problem solve
9 Christmas cards gift for grand kids
10. Take wife out to eat if she is up to it.
11. Call Dr. Or text
12 exercises and soak feet