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1,511 Public Reviews Given
1,604 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I look for a good hook at the beginning and like stories that "hit the ground running". Good plots with a theme, strong characters with an emotional impact, moving dialogue, sensory descriptions, clear communication and words with a purpose are strong points of a good story.
I'm good at...
knowing a good story when I read one. I like to read as much as I like to write, maybe more. I will let you know when a sentence just does not make sense to me, and I will try to give you my opinion on how to make it better.
Favorite Genres
biographical, family, drama, mystery, comedy, nature, young adult
Least Favorite Genres
sci-fi, erotica, fantasy, mythology
Favorite Item Types
short stories, essays, fiction & non-fiction
Least Favorite Item Types
novels
I will not review...
novels...sorry, no time
Public Reviews
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451
451
Review of Juniper Park  Open in new Window.
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Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Reading*Please accept the following as an intended helpful review.....*Smile*

I liked this short story, being scared of spiders myself, and read it with trepidation.

Your story flowed with an orderly and structured tempo.

Your character, yourself, told all your fears about spiders.

Your plot, surviving one night in the midst of millions of your enemy, carried off the main conflict of your story with comedy and valor.

Your resolution of getting the heck out of there would have been my choice as well.

My only suggestion for improvement although your story was a true experience could have been spiced up with a more "deadly" encounter.

Overall, a very enjoyable read about an unenjoyable topic.

By all means, keep writing and sharing.

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Red Sunset
452
452
Review of Broken Dreams  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with Rising Stars of WdC  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Rising Stars Member to Member Reviewing Sig

*Reading*Please accept the following as an intended helpful review.....*Smile*

I liked this story about a young woman on the brink of her marriage.

Your story flowed with an orderly tempo. I noticed no stumbles.

Your character, Brooke, apparently had come to the seashore alone to clear her thoughts and misgivings about her pending wedding.

Your plot, Brooke's concerns with her overbearing future mother-in-law, presented itself as an inner conflict in her decision to go ahead with her wedding.

Your resolution, the symbolic removal of her engagement ring, laying it where the all-knowing seagull once sat and walking away sealed the decision not to marry.

My only suggestion for improvement...identifyig Julia earlier in the story would have helped me.

Overall, an interesting and well-told story.

By all means, keep writing and sharing.

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Red Sunset
453
453
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

*Reading*Please accept the following as an intended helpful review.....*Smile*

First, I'd like to thank you for writing this article. It helps to hear someone else put into words what many of us feel. Comparing our stories or poems to children is true. Ours are perfect; everyone else's need correction *Smile*.

Praise is important...it helps to keep one interested and trying...but, in the long run, it does little to make us better writers. The longer I am on this site, the more I look for and yearn to have those critical reviews, ones that tell me how I can write better; and the best reviews suggest ways to accomplish that.

Tearing a story apart is painful, but knowing how to build it back up, and getting that new review of improvement is worth it.

I hope I haven't committed the "sin" of too much praise, but you have certainly written a very worthwhile article. Thank you...and Happy WDC Anniversary!

By all means, keep writing and sharing.

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Red Sunset
454
454
Review of Clarity  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
*Reading*Please accept the following as an intended helpful review.....for the Paper Doll Gang Alumni Short Story Contest.*Smile*

I liked the way you weaved the prompt into your story.

Your story flow was easy and orderly with good progression.

Your characters, Sam and Audra, didn't share much personal info with us...only their deep feelings for each other and that Sam traveled as part of his job.

Your plot, Audra's feelings that she was being forgotten on Valentine's Day, set up your storyline.

Your resolution of the ring in the heart-shaped chocolate box definitely following the prompt.

My only suggestion for improvement...a little more characterization for background and interest.

Overall, an enjoyable read.

By all means, keep writing and sharing.

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Red Sunset
455
455
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

*Reading*Please accept the following as an intended helpful review.....*Smile*

I liked this story about a pleasant childhood memory, buying a new car.

Your story flowed easily, chronologically and had no stumbles.

Your characters, the boy and the Chevy Nova, were well described and vividly clear.

Your plot, the boy's plan to get the "realest" car he could, was interestingly told.

Your resolution of the Chevy Nova was satisfactory, apparently, since he was eager to brag to his friends.

Overall, a cute story of a childhood experience.

By all means, keep writing and sharing.

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456
456
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
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*Reading*Please accept the following as an intended helpful review.....*Smile*

This was the sad story of the misspent life of an old woman whose marriage was arranged. Although she had her dreams starting out, after years of abuse and children she didn't want, she has ended up bitter and ill. Apparently, her children care more for her than she does for them. Yet, she still wants to live.

Your story flowed easily...I had no stumbles.

Your protagonist seemed real to me.

Your plot seemed to do with the woman's inner turmoil.

Your resolution seemed abrupt and inaccurate for the story.

My only suggestion for improvement - change the ending.

Overall, a very interesting read until I got to the end.

By all means, keep writing and sharing...and HAPPY WDC ANNIVERSARY!

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457
457
Review of The Sentence  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
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*Reading*Please accept the following as an intended helpful review.....*Smile*

I liked your story but the title, being in the mindset I am, for some reason led me to believe it was about grammar...lol.

Your story flowed very smoothly. I noticed no stumbles and hurried through it to find out the ending.

Your characters seemed real...you did a good job.

Your plot, the father's turmoil of wanting to avenge his daughter's death, was well done

Your resolution of having the father shot and his last sentence was fitting.

Overall, an interesting read...keep writing and sharing... and HAPPY WDC ANNIVERSARY!
By all means, keep writing and sharing.

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458
458
Review of Wishful Thinking  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Reading*Please accept the following as an intended helpful review.....*Smile*

I liked your pov in this story, second person. It's hard to do but you have done it fairly well...mysteries take to it, I believe.

Your story flowed very well. I had no hangups.

Your characters were real and could be pictured easily.

Your plot, what was the gun and key for, was well executed.

Your resolution, when the police arrived and answered that question, seemed completely right for the storyline.

My only suggestion for improvement- I didn't know why the bag was "lying in shreds".

Overall, a very interesting story, well-told.

By all means, keep writing and sharing.

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459
459
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
*Reading*Please accept the following as an intended helpful review.....*Smile*

This was a heartfelt story told in first person per the prompt. I could feel the writer's trepidation, even fear, at the unknown, the first dose of chemo.

Your story flowed easily and I noticed no stumbles

Your scene and characters were real to me.

Your conflict lay within the writer himself and his decision to start chemo.

Your resolution ultimately to take the chemo even knowing what it could do relieved the reader.

Overall, a very emotional and personal story.

By all means, keep writing and sharing.

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460
460
In affiliation with Rising Stars of WdC  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Rising Stars Member to Member Reviewing Sig

*Reading*Please accept the following as an intended helpful review.....*Smile*

I liked the way you told this story in "real time". Many emotions are shown through your dialogue giving those emotions more emphasis.

Your story flowed easily with no stumbles.

Your characters' emotions are heightened through dialogue and the entire scene becomes very clear.

Your title, also your last sentence, says it all, an afterthought to the mom, a volcano to the daughter.

Overall, a very well written biographical account of a world shattering experience for a daughter who is suddenly told of the existence of a sister....with children of her own.
By all means, keep writing and sharing.

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461
461
Review of First Date  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
I am reviewing your item for the "Invalid ItemOpen in new Window.. Please remember this is my opinion. It is my hope it may be of some help to you.*Smile*

Topic - No topic given.

Anonymity - No need for anonymity.

Structure - The form used was different but certainly acceptable.

Eye Appeal - After you think of a topic, insert some writing ml for eye appeal...emoticons...colors...different font size...etc.

Member Attraction - A topic is basic for member attraction....something the majority can relate to.

Overall - A good start...don't give up now...you've done the hard part.

Red Sunset

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462
462
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am reviewing your item for the "Invalid ItemOpen in new Window.. Please remember this is my opinion. It is my hope it may be of some help to you.*Smile*

Topic - An original topic, what one thing would you bring to a desert isle?

Anonymity - No anonymity needed here...just a pretent situation.

Structure - Specific instructions and example given.

Eye Appeal - No writing ml used...little eye appeal.

Member Attraction - Most likely will evoke thoughful responses from many members.

Overall - An interesting in and out.

Red Sunset

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463
463
Review of Favorite Idioms  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
I am reviewing your item for the "Invalid ItemOpen in new Window.. Please remember this is my opinion. It is my hope it may be of some help to you.*Smile*

Topic - You've created an interesting and original topic for an in and out, favorite idioms.

Anonymity - No anonymity needed here..may spark some friendships between like minds.

Structure - Good clear instructions with a nice chuckle to start with...idiom not idiot...lol. And a good reference link given.

Eye Appeal - You could have made lots more use of writing ml for more eye appeal.

Member Attraction - The topic should evoke responses from many members as there are idioms in every language.

Overall - A thoughtful and original idea for an in and out.

Red Sunset

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464
464
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am reviewing your item for the "Invalid ItemOpen in new Window.. Please remember this is my opinion. It is my hope it may be of some help to you.*Smile*

Topic - Everyone has a favorite memory so this in and out should attract many thoughtful responses.

Anonymity - No need for anonymity here, all responses should be proudly atated.

Structure - Your instructions and rules are clear but you have little setup and no writing ml.

Eye Appeal - Very little eye appeal.

Member Attraction - A broad spectrum of member attraction with this question.

Overall - An appealing topic for an in and out.

Red Sunset

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465
465
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
I am reviewing your item for the "Invalid ItemOpen in new Window.. Please remember this is my opinion. It is my hope it may be of some help to you.*Smile*

Topic - Live to write or write to live is a specific topic certainly making one think why they are writing.

Anonymity - Revealing your authors helps to create shared responses between members perhaps leading to new friendship.

Structure - Your layout and instructions are clear with your own response as a starting point.

Eye Appeal I believe you could have made better use of writing ml and setting up your in and out.

Member Attraction - This topic should appeal to members and evoke a response from most.

Overall - An interesting topic for an in and out.

Red Sunset

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466
466
Review of Sunrise  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Reading*Please accept the following as an intended helpful review.....*Smile*

I liked the short story and found it intriguing...a husband whose late night drinking has wiped some memory from his brain.

Your story flowed easily with some twists and turns to make the reader think.

Your character, the star of the story, was certainly having a bad day....he didn't even notice his room number changed.

Your plot...I'm not sure exactly what your plot was...getting his memory back...learning some things about himself in the meantime through a very strange journey.

Your resolution of finding his wife at the end and the clockwork stopping....he solved the puzzle.

Overall, an interesting read.

By all means, keep writing and sharing.

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467
467
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Reading*Please accept the following as an intended helpful review.....*Smile*

I liked this story told in dialogue only by two strangers at a bar.

Your story flowed well and I had no trouble following it.

Your characters, the speaker, the listener, the speaker's diving partner, the fish and the barracuda, all came together to made a very interesting read.

Your plot taken from the title set up the story from the very beginning.

Your resolution was imaginative and completely understood.

Overall, a very interesting read.

By all means, keep writing and sharing.

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468
468
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
The following review is only my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. It is my hope you find it helpful in some way.

I like the idea for your contest. It's creative, original and, certainly, inspirational. It encourages people to think positively about themselves and others.

Thanking your donors near the top of your contest is also a good idea showing them real appreciation for their help and backing.

Your rules are clear and in telling your entrants that you will commence reviewing as items are submitted, you inspire authors to edit before entering, always a good idea.

Asking for guest judges is good for backup and in case you are overwhelmed *Thumbsup*.

Prizes are appropriate and you imply increases as funds become available.

Page layout was appealing with good use of writing ml and good links were provided.

Overall, an imaginative and inspiring contest.

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Review of STINKER  Open in new Window.
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Rated: E | (4.5)
Rising Stars Member to Member Reviewing Sig

*Reading*Please accept the following as an intended helpful review.....*Smile*

I liked your story about kitties since I love them also.

Your story flowed smoothly as I eagerly read through, crossing my fingers for "Stinker".

Your characters, uh uh hum, kitties were aptly described by their names, I'm sure, since we all probably do the same thing.

Your plot, Stinker's roof escapades, brought many memories to mind.

Your resolution of the ladder in your jammies gave me a chuckle.

Overall, a bright spot in a dreary-looking day down here. Thanks and keep writing and sharing, please......

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470
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In affiliation with The Talent Pond  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
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*Reading*Please accept the following as an intended helpful review.....*Smile*

I liked this children's heartfelt story about the love between two brothers. That old saying about brothers saying anything to each other but don't let a stranger into the mix is certainly true.

Your story flowed easily and I encountered no stumbles.

Your characters were adequately described to move the story along.

Your plot to show the brothers' deep feelings for each other was well told and easily understood.

Your resolution of the postcard given to Jeremy proved his brother's love.

Overall, an easy and heart warming read.

By all means, keep writing and sharing.

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471
471
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
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*Reading*Please accept the following as an intended helpful review.....*Smile*

I enjoyed reading your review of your story about the river in which you tried to clarify certain points in your story. That it was told from the point of view of the wife (or girl) was obvious to the reader. The comparison of life to the river was not so obvious, and you have explained it beautifully.

In your story I especially liked your saying the hole left in her heart was the shape of her husband and no one else would fit. Well done. I enjoyed the story and the review.

By all means, keep writing and sharing.

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472
472
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
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*Reading*Please accept the following as an intended helpful review.....*Smile*

I liked your idea for this story, an aspiring chef who neglects to keep an eye on her cake.

Your story flowed chronologically. I liked your reference to the kitchen as the "cake sanctuary" and to yourself as the "baking prodigy". Very original. You "blew up" your dream as well as your cake.

My only suggestion for improvement is more attention to punctuation and grammar, but, I'm assuming you are African, nonetheless, you have done an excellent job with content.

Overall, a funny and enjoyable story.

By all means, keep writing and sharing.

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473
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In affiliation with The Talent Pond  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
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*Reading*Please accept the following as an intended helpful review.....*Smile*

I liked your idea for this story, one with which we all can empathize. Ideas and opportunity don't often coincide with each other.

Your story flows without a hitch...I had not one pause.

Your characters (the workmen, the young boys, your husband) added meat and interest to your dilemna.

Your plot, the search for a peaceful place to write "in time" hit the mark perfectly.

Your resolution, the closet, was original and brought an "of course" thought to my mind.

Overall, a very entertaining read.

By all means, keep writing and sharing.

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474
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In affiliation with The Talent Pond  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
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The following review is only my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. It is my hope you find it helpful in some way.

Your title was most appropriate for your inspiring words. It led me into the poem with a hint of what was to come.

The flow of your poem was smooth and without stumbles.

Your poem's tone was sober, loving and steadfast.

Your choice of words came from the heart and told of the deepest of loves..."till death do us part".

Your imagery painted a picture of closeness and unity.

Overall, a beautiful poem that was a pleasure to read.

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Review of Media Memoir  Open in new Window.
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Rated: E | (5.0)
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This essay was a beautiful tribute to your sister, Gin, who has influenced your life in such a special and important way and continues to influence it daily.

Your title is most appropriate attributing many forms of media to her inspiration and guidance.

Your essay is written chronilogically citing facts and personal information to support your belief in your sister's power over your life. It was a pleasure to read...please keep writing and sharing.

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