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1,223 Public Reviews Given
1,228 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I try to give reviews the way I prefer to receive them. Honesty, thoughts for improvement, and identifying strengths are aspects that I prefer from others, so I give these things in return.
I'm good at...
I can pretty much review anything, whether poetry or short stories. My favorite genres to read are horror and the odder side of fiction, but I am open to reading other genres. If I do review a genre that is not one I particularly enjoy reading, then I am most likely going to review it based on the structure, rather than the content.
Favorite Genres
I tend to gravitate toward writings in the dark genres. With short stories and novels, horror is my favorite. With poetry, I prefer writings that display raw emotions. If your writing tackles a subject that people find offensive, I might like it.
Least Favorite Genres
Christian literature, Western, and Children's. I will NOT read or review anything that consists of XGC material between minors and adults or encourages abuse as acceptable behaviors.
Favorite Item Types
Dark poetry, horror, emotional, autobiographical, erotica, psychology
Least Favorite Item Types
Horror is one of my favorites to read and write. Also, poetry that tackles intense subject matter interests me.
I will not review...
I WILL NOT review anything that encourages abuse as acceptable behavior or includes XGC material between a minor and adult. All review requests asking me to read whole novels or later chapters will be rejected. The reason being is that I can not give a fair review of chapter 3 when I have not read the chapters before that and, the time allowance when requests for reviews are made does not allow for enough time to read a whole novel.
Public Reviews
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226
Review of AN IRONICAL LIFE  
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: ASR | (3.5)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
It was interesting reading your perspective on pulling the plug on those being kept alive by medical means only.

*Snow3* Strengths
You seem to have put yourself in the victim of such a circumstances shoes. The annoyance towards those who are forcing the subject of the poem to live comatose in a hospital bed is obvious. As you express, even if a miracle happens, her life would be crippled.

Then that "I shall be free!" seems sarcastic. There is nothing free about being mentally and physically crippled.

*Snow3* Suggestions
Even in poetry, lines should follow regular speech patterns. In some areas you reverse the subject and predicate, which interrupts the flow of the poem. This happens when poets are more conforming to the form and rhyme than they are the content.

"Does, somehow, me now revive."- Somehow revive me would make more sense.

You begin every line with a capital, but it would be more visually appealing if you used capitalization with regular punctuation rules.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
This is an emotive poem, bringing awareness from the viewpoint of someone having to live by aid of machines, which is not really living. Excellent job making your views felt.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
227
227
Review of Crazy in Love  
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
I am a bit warped, but I love a good love story that includes the mentally ill. So, I totally get this.

*Snow3* Strengths
There are some interesting analogies here. I like how you describe love with those who are considered insane as " harmonic laughs of two speechless sweethearts". That is an interesting perception. Mental illness runs in my family and, something that I have evaluated is that there is a particular rawness and realness about how they express emotions. So, I can see how you can evaluate this as sweet and harmonic.

"Through the stretched skin of conjoined twins"- I love how you explain that connection to another as conjoined twins. Nicely stated.

Then you take this to a more extreme level with more sociopath lunacy, which many would disagree about them actually understanding real love. But, it is all up to interpretation, so maybe their perception is more intense.

*Snow3* Suggestions
You seem to have forgotten to include some punctuation. The first half of the poem doesn't have ending punctuation, but the second half does. Maybe decide which way you prefer to go and make it consistent throughout.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
I enjoyed your non-conformist views on love. It was refreshing to read something that gives another viewpoint that most do not consider.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
228
228
Review of Rebecca  
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
By the description, I came to the conclusion that this would be about being on morphine while having Multiple Sclerosis. This helped in understanding the poem. It seems as if you are describing the feeling that brings you back to a whimsical time in childhood, while also contrasting it with the pain of the disorder.

*Snow3* Strengths
There is some great imagery here. I may be reading too much into it, but When you mention fluids fueling your muse, it shows to me that the two stanzas about childhood is what the Morphine feels like. That is an excellent analogy to explain the drowsy, daydreaming feeling the drug gives.

Then you share some strong imagery about the pain. I particularly love the following lines:
"my flesh will take its time corroding,
tormenting toxic bombs exploding;
within this shriveled shell of stone."

With these lines, the pain you feel is clearly shown to a high degree.

*Snow3* Suggestions
the dark eternity I browse.- The reversal of the subject and predicate here interrupts the flow of the poem.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
This is a very emotive poem, filled with imagery that clearly shows the contrast of the pain you feel in the disorder and the feeling when that pain is numbed through drugs.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.

229
229
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
There is a rumor going around that you sit and plot all year on how to challeng GoTers. I think that there is truth to that. *Bigsmile*

*Snow3* Strengths
It is apparent that a lot of thought and preparation went into this torture chamber. I love the names of the wheel turns by the way! Very creative.

The rules are easy to understand if you actually read them. I appreciate how you add that those who forfit have to wait another 72 hours before spinning again. It is only fair, especially to those who actually complete their activity.

The 24 hour wait thing is good too, because there are people like me who actually work and can not sit around spinning a wheel all day. Then those who do not work would rack up all the points *Bigsmile*.

I love how the different rooms incorporate involvement between the different houses by tagging other teams. There is a lot of room for houses to strategize, which makes the game a lot more fun.

*Snow3* Suggestions
This is well thought out and way beyond anything I would creatively think up, so I have no ideas for making it even better. It is excellent as is.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
Thank you for all the time you have put together creating this awesome activity. *Heart*

Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.

230
230
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
It has been a while since I have entered this contest, but I do think that it an important contribution to WdC.

*Snow3* Strengths
I appreciate that this encourages creativity through structured verse. It seems that the modern fads lack appreciation for meter, which is an important part of writing poetry.

The page is constructed well with rules being easy to follow without any confusing bits. You are also clear on what rewards are.

The fact that you share previous winners is an ego boost to writers, encouraging them to submit more writing. What writer doesn't like their writing highlighted.

*Snow3* Suggestions
This contest is put together well, so I have no suggestions for improvement.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
This is an excellent contest that encourages the appreciation for metered and rhyming poetry. It is truly an excellent contest and I hope that it continues to run for a long time.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.

231
231
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
This is an excellent contest that encourages aspects that make for great story writing.

*Snow3* Strengths
I like that you enforce the importance of more than one twist in a story. It encourages a better quality of writing.

Rules are clear without any confusing bits. The page has an explanation of possible awards, which is helpful for those who submit. You even let your entrants know that "you hate sad stories". Good to know if a writer is known for their emotional writing.

It is pretty neat that you offer to review all entrants and even give them gps for entering.

*Snow3* Suggestions
The contest is put together well, and honestly I can not find any way that I would suggest to improve on it. The only complaint I would have is that I am not skilled enough to win it *Bigsmile*.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
Maybe I will submit to this again. Only with practice will I even get better anyhow. This is a great contest and I hope it continues to get more entrants.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.

232
232
Review of The Survivalist  
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
So, Robert turned you into a flesh eating sex zombie and you turned him into a roach. Funny! This story gave me a giggle.

*Snow3* Strengths
The character development was done well with the subject of the story. His transition and emotions toward it were shown well.

Going by your rants and political poetry, I can't help but think that the president he rants about is futuristic version of Trump.

The transition toward turning into a roach was done really well. I suspected that he was turning into a roach, but then again, I have a warped mind. Not everyone would come to that conclusion.

*Snow3* Suggestions
This a well crafted short write and error free, so I have no suggestions to give.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
This was perfect for Distorted Minds and it was an entertaining read. Hopefully you will continue to contribute in future rounds.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
233
233
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
Although I do not hold all the political views as you, I do find your political themed poetry entertaining and well crafted.

*Snow3* Strengths
The poem flows well, almost dancing like a funny political song, sang folk-like. Rhymes are consistent without any feeling forced.

My favorite aspect here is the sarcasm. You use a topic that many agree is something wrong going on with our political system and churn it into a comedic verse. With all the memes going around poking fun at trump, it is a challenge to come up with wording that would not be cliche, but you accomplished it.

*Snow3* Suggestions
This is an expertly crafted poem and I have no suggestions that would improve on it. It is awesome as is.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
Thank you for sharing your comedic views and hopefully you will continue to share your poetry with the Rebel Poetry Contest.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
234
234
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
This was horrific, but symbolic at the same time. As always I have enjoyed the read into your demented mind.

*Snow3* Strengths
Some of the best horror stories derive from the horror writers nightmares, so it is interesting that you chose a nightmare as a dream. The whole heart in a box is an interesting concept.

Maybe it is because I am a poet, but for me, it seems as though the significance of removing the heart for the nightmares to stop is to remove emotion, so that they will stop. Or, maybe I am just reading too much into it.

The atmosphere with the dark room and single candle gives that creepy image, which is fitting for horror and this dark tale.

*Snow3* Suggestions
Honestly, I could not find any ways that I could suggest improvement. This is well edited and an excellent read as is.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
Well, I love horror, so with it being a free genre review day with GoT I had to stop by your lovely port and of course I was not disappointed.
Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
235
235
Review of Saving Grace  
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
This is an excellent magical tell. As always your poetic skills shine through.

*Snow3* Strengths
Rhymes are consistent throughout with your aabb rhyme scheme. None seem forced and when read out loud the poem flows smoothly.

The imagery in the uncovering of the story is one of the best aspects of this poem. The relationship between the girl and dragon makes this story. Then you threw in a little mythology and history with Atlantis and Casa Nuevo, which adds to the extravagance of the story.

*Snow3* Suggestions
This is a well crafted poem and I do not have any advice to apply that would improve on this already excellent poem.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
I enjoyed the magical ride with your dragon story in a poem. You did well with this prompt and it is deserving of the ribbon that adorns it.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
236
236
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
This is a lovely epic tale told in poetic verse. I enjoyed the beauty of your words and the story that you tell.

*Snow3* Strengths
The story that you tell using imagery is the best part of this. The kinship between the woman and the dragon as her protector is a magically sweet aspect to this poem.

Although it does not rhyme it flows well due to somewhat consistent meter.
*Snow3* Suggestions


Replies the dragon, rough and rudely,/Let me be upon your back.- I really don't think that you meant that the dragon wanted to be on someone's back and instead meant that the someone else wanted to be on his back. So, I would consider adding some clarity here.

Disdains the dragon simple steel.- This line makes no sense. Did you mean "simple still" or were you meaning that the dragon was saying, "simple steel" to mock someone with a sword?

With its claws, honed and ivory,/ Tears the gem from the soul.- This is a sentence fragment, so I would suggest either rephrasing or changing the punctuation.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
This is truly a sweet magical tell and I have enjoyed the read. Hopefully you will get around to editing this in the future.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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237
Review of The Dragon Pearl  
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
This was an excellent use of the prompt words that were given. It tells a wonderfully imaginative story as well.

*Snow3* Strengths
The strength here is in the imagery used to tell this story in poetic form. It takes the reader to that world of fantasy where dragons fly freely and wizards cast spells. The idea of adding a magical pearl into the verse was very creative.

Rhymes are consistant with some less common rhymes like "gem" and "djinni".

*Snow3* Suggestions
So that he could his story expound.- The reversal of the subject and predicate in this line makes it seem forced, which interrupts with the flow. Maybe consider rearranging the sentence and visiting some sister rhymes to correct it.

Also, capitalization with every beginning line is unneeded. Visually, it would be better if you only added capitalization where puctuaation requires it.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
This was an enjoyable read and I loved your imaginative take on the prompts. I enjoyed the journey expressed in your verse.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
238
238
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
Every month I have peeked in on this contest, but alas, I get stumped, because romance is the most challenging genre for me to write in, that is unless it is a romance with a horror setting *Bigsmile*. Now that I have a romantic muse in my life, maybe I will have more fuel for romantic writing.

*Snow3* Strengths
The contest is put together well. Rules are precise and clear without any confusing bits. Possible rewards are shown, that way those who submit poems know what they are working towards.

Prompts have not been something that I can relate to, but going by writing I have read on here, they are relevant to a larger group here on WdC.

*Snow3* Suggestions
This is put together well and I could not find anything that I can suggest to make it better. I would say prompts, but I understand that I am just an odd one and don't speak for the majority.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
This is a well put together contest. Judging by the large amount of romantic poetry that I have read here on WdC, I am surprised that you do not get more submissions.

Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.

239
239
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
This is a well put together contest, offering those of us to share free verse poems. Since it does not have a set theme, it allows for more free writing about any topic.

*Snow3* Strengths
Directions and awards are easy to understand without any confusion. You even show a list of current submissions and those who have won the previous round. What writer doesn't want their work highlighted, so this helps to encourage people to submit more.

The special months, like this one, where you double rewards is a great idea, because it is kind of like saying thank you and come share our anniversary with us.

From my experience, when I submitted to the contest, judging is fairly quick, so there is not too much wait time, which is nice for the writer who submitted to the contest.

*Snow3* Suggestions
Honestly, this is put together really well without any errors, so I have no suggestions that would aid in improvement.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
I love this contest and how it encourages more free thought and expression. Thank you for creating this space.

Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.

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240
Review of Sacrifices  
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
First of all, I just want to say this was an excellent use of the prompt. Those who served to defend our country do commit to the ultimate self-sacrifice. My first step-father (My mother married 5 times), who I considered my only true father was a Vietnam Veteran and I saw a lot of him in this poem.

*Snow3* Strengths
You take the reader on a journey through the emotions of one who has survived a war, yet lost many great friends. He is not exactly overly prideful, but instead when he sees himself he remembers his younger self and those who did not survive, along with the loves he sacrificed do to his service to our country.

Reading it, I thought of my father who left behind a woman and three children while he served two terms in Vietnam. My boss is also a Vietnam Veteran and while he was serving in the war he sacrificed witnessing the birth of his son and did not meet his own son until it was almost his first birthday.

Structurally, the poem flows well without any forced rhymes. The poem is emotive and one that many could relate to because they have either experienced the emotions or know someone who is a veteran.

*Snow3* Suggestions
This is a well edited poem, so as far as my perceptions can see, there are no errors.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
This was an excellent poem and excellent use of the prompt. Thank you for sharing it.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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241
Review of Rapunzel  
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
I am a huge Monty Python fan and that is what I thought of when I first read this. I could so see this being one of their skits!

*Snow3* Strengths

You did well taking the prompt to a unique level. Mostly, I appreciate the dry humor in this. The ladder thing and the pulling of the hair made me giggle. I mean really, in that old fairy tale, wouldn't you think that she would be upset by him climbing up her hair?!

Then that ending, was a surprise that I didn't see coming. Yep, like I mentioned, very Monty Python *Bigsmile*. I don't want to give the ending away to the few people that might read this review, so I will just say, it is a great ending to an unusual take on an old fairy tale.

*Snow3* Suggestions

“Seriously?” she said. “You didn’t bring a ladder?” - rather than "said" body language might enhance the story more. It would also show more character development.

In spite of her protestations- I am not sure about your word choice here. Wouldn't reservations work better than protestations?

The prince touched his fingers to his own sparse goatee, and felt, in a word, resentful.- this would read better without "in a word"

*Snow3* Final thoughts
This was an entertaining read. I love the sarcasm and dark humor. Most importantly it is unique.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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242
Review of Virtue  
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
Since I read the other poem, I figured I should read this one. I love the way you put the words on the right side because it obviously was meant to be the opposite of the other poem.

*Snow3* Strengths
Since this was meant, obviously, to be read with the other poem, the structure is interesting. Both poems could easily be on the same page, while displayed on each side of the screen. The titles are exact opposite of the other poem titles, which is a unique invented form.

The poem flows well when read outloud without any forced rhyming. Also, like the other poem, there is some valuable advice present in the writing.

*Snow3* Suggestions
Other than thinking that this should include some punctuation, I really do not see any issues.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
This was a very creative way to present your poems. I might give this a try some time, but with a different topic.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
243
243
Review of Sin  
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
This was an interesting interpretation of the seven deadly sins. There's some valuable advice in here as well.

*Snow3* Strengths
Rhymes are consistant and there is a lot of less commonly used rhymes, such as "offload" and "corrode".

There are some strong lines that encourage thought. My favorite is "Always determined to get more/Will cost you in this spiritual war." These lines could also hint to the spiritual wars that are going on right now. It seems that religion is the largest excuse to cause harm on other countries, when the real reason for the war actually has nothing to do with God and is instead about monetary gain.

*Snow3* Suggestions
It is challenging sometimes to decide whether a poem should include punctuation or not. Honestly, this poem, I believe would benefit from some punctuation.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
I enjoyed reading your perception of the seven deadly sins. There were some powerful lessons given in it that could relate to society as we know it today.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of School Pressures  
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
It seems that you are expressing the assembly line mentality in our society. We are expected to sit in a desk and learn, then go off to college for some money making career.
Creativity is less encouraged than academic grades, which is sad.

*Snow3* Strengths
Rhyme is consistent with the form and they flow smoothly without feeling forced. When read out loud it flows beautifully.

The subject matter of the poem, most can relate too, especially us writers. Some of us are academics, but above all, we value our creativity.

That last line is the perfect way to conclude this poem. Interestingly, I am at that age (40ish) where we reflect back on our lives. I have come to realize that no, it is not worth it if it is not what brings me true happiness. Life is too short.

*Snow3* Suggestions
With grades given at the instructor's discretion.- This is a sentence fragment. The line before it should have a comma, rather than a period.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
This is a great poem addressing an aspect in our society, that many can agree on.

Like the other poem I reviewed, there is no need to capitalize the first letter of every line.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
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I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
I believe that most readers can relate to the words that you express. By the time we are adults, we usually have loved and lost at least once in our lives.

*Snow3* Strengths
Rhymes are consitant without being forced. You also have some less commonly rhymed words, such as "reminisce" and "amiss". You also stay true to the form chosen.

It seems to be a trend with newer poets to think that they have to put a comma after every line or when they want a pause. Though, just as in other forms of writing, punctuation should be correct. It was refreshing to see that you applied punctuation rules correctly to your poem.

There are some good lines. The one that hits me the most is, "My pride unwilling to concede the fight." I have only been dumped once. For me it was hard to think of that person as being gone, because I was not emotionally done with the relationship. Of course for the other person, they have closure.

*Snow3* Suggestions
The only suggestion I have is not to begin every line with a capital and instead capitalize where it is appropriate with the punctuation.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
You apparently revisited a sad time in your life for this poem. Most have been in the position of the subject of this poem, at one time or another. It is a struggle overcoming the ego to accept our part in the loss.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of The Wooden Sphere  
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
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I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
The main character in this story would make a great addition to a larger works, possibly a novel. As always, I've enjoyed your twisted tale. You took a mundane thing that most of us do, find images in wood grains, and spun an intriguing story out of it.

*Snow3* Strengths
I love the imagery in this story. The reader can really feel the story as if they are experiencing it with him. In some ways the imagery is almost poetic because of the metaphors used. My favorite is "Nausea rolled like a slop of chilled oysters in my stomach."

Then the ending leaves me with the feeling that it isn't mental illness at all and that he has a gift, or curse depending on perception. It was a great way to close the story, but I am left wondering what he will do with this gift.

*Snow3* Suggestions
This has apparently been well edited, though I did find one error.

while my mind drown in a sea of claustrophobia.- Did you mean to write drowned?

*Snow3* Final thoughts
I was hooked from beginning to end and can't wait to see what other goodies you have in your port for me to read.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
247
247
Review of The Abandoned  
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
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I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
This seems like a glimpse into a larger works. The basic idea is interesting, but it seems unfinished.

*Snow3* Strengths
The story flows well without any confusing bits. Also, you did well making it obvious that the man in the story has an evil plan.

*Snow3* Suggestions
This seems like more of a list of girls and then a description on what the man plans to do with them. We are mostly told the story, rather than shown.

It also seems unfinished. We know that he plans on doing something with these young women, but we do not know the outcome.

Also, there needs to be a twist somewhere. This story is pretty much straight forward, with very little mystery.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
I could see this evolving with some editing. Maybe consider expanding on it and adding more clarity to the conclusion.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
248
248
Review of First Memory  
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 18+ | (3.0)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
This was an intriguing concept for a short story. Of course it is a little similar to the movie that you mentioned, but at least you express that you are aware of it in the beginning. Also, it almost seems more like a first chapter than a short story.

*Snow3* Strengths
You do well with dialogue. For the most part the words inside the quotation marks flow like normal speech patterns without seeming overly formal.

You also do well with hooking your reader right away with that first paragraph. The reader is immediately taken to the action, which encourages the reader to continue reading.

*Snow3* Suggestions
I would suggest adding some body language with the dialogue. Her husband thinks she is dead and then sees her, don't you think a person would be more emotional about that?

We are left with the knowledge that she left a message for herself, which I suspect is supposed to be the evidence, yet we are never told what that evidence is. If this is meant to be a short story and not a chapter, it seems unfinished.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
The overall idea is a good one. You just need to fine tune it a little.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
249
249
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: E | (2.5)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
This is an interesting story concept that with some editing, I can see being turned into a longer story.

*Snow3* Strengths
The strength here is the creative concept. I am pretty sure that I have never read a story that included a young man gaining extreme strength from finding a magical ring.

*Snow3* Suggestions
There are a lot of issues in the delivery of this story. First of all, you have lumped it all into one paragraph, when it should be separated into several paragraphs.

Also, you use said way too much. Maybe think of some more creative ways to express speech that show the emotions of the characters, such as growled. Sometimes this isn't even needed with dialogue. Instead, you can just add dialogue into the actions of the story because it is obvious that someone said something by the quotation marks. Below is an example of what I mean.

While he was walking through the jungle, a ring fell from a branch on the tallest tree, and hit poor-ol' Crash smack in the head. "Ow!" Crash exclaimed. "What was that?"

Example of correction: A ring fell from a branch and hit poor ol' Crash in the head, "Ow! What was that?"

You also constantly switch from present tense to past tense, which is confusing.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
This seems like a rough draft. The story concept is an interesting one, but it just needs to be edited quite a bit.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of The Sun Also Sets  
Review by Warped Sanity
In affiliation with The Iron Bank of Braavos  
Rated: 13+ | N/A (Review only item.)
Image for GoT




I am Warped Sanity of the White Walkers, sponsored by "The Witch's House" ! Welcome to the biggest Reviews' War on WDC, "Game of Thrones" 

*Snow3* First Impression
This was a creative way to share a bit of history in literature and bull fighting. It was an entertaining read.

*Snow3* Strengths
The whole idea of having your cow persona travel back in time was a cool way to write a tribute to a great author. In such a short write, you add quite a bit of character development. I particularly like how you used perceptions about what we know about Hemmingway to develop his character.

This was a light and non-abrasive way to show a bit of dark history in bull fighting. It is really cruel how they are stabbed. It seems so unfair.

Then adding that Hooves is actually the bull in his book, was quite brilliant. Hooves seems quite proud, going by the character you developed in the story.

*Snow3* Suggestions
Honestly, this is a well written little story and I could not find anything to suggest that would improve on it.

*Snow3* Final thoughts
I have enjoyed the read. Thanks for the smiles. This light read was a lovely way to start my day in reviewing. Oh, and the book that you used as your muse was required reading when I was in High School, too.

Thank you for allowing me to read your writing. Remember this is just the opinions of one person.It is up to you, the writer, to determine which advice to apply. Hopefully my thoughts on your writing have been helpful.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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