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Sun, Oct 26, 2025

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Are You Listening???

by Charlie ~

Rated: GC · Book · Emotional · #2181458

A journey of self-improvement - or not.

Sup? I'm Char.
You may know me from timeless classics such as

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#2030442 by Not Available.

and

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I blog for things like

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FORUM

30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS

(13+)
WDC's Longest Running Blog Competition - Hiatus
#1786069 by FivetricksterTreats

FORUM

JAFBG

(XGC)
Because real life isn't always roses and sunshine...
#2094931 by Elisa, Stik-or-Treat

[Embed For Use By Upgraded+]
Believin' all the lies that they're tellin' ya
Buyin' all the products that they're sellin' ya
They say jump and ya say "how high?"
Ya braindead, ya got a fuckin' bullet in ya head

Show Recent Comments

10 Most Recent Blog Comments:

👀intu the Darkness

Jul 22, 2023 at 8:05am
In response to "Invalid Entry"

Hey Char, It's been a while since I've touched base with you. I'm so sorry for your loss. The last thing people should say is everyone loses their grandparents eventually, or it will get better with time. It's the last thing you want to hear when you're hurting. Death sucks, long-lasting illness sucks! Having to decide to let the person go to keep them from suffering REALLY SUCKS! I think the only ones who can understand truly just how much are those who have had to make that decision. My heart breaks for you.

I'm not religious, but I do have a strong faith in God. I call myself spiritual because I don't agree with all the rules and regulations of religion. I do know I will see my family and friends again, and this is a great comfort. I can only imagine how much more painful the death of loved ones is without this belief. But you're right, it can't be faked. But it is a beautiful thing.

Having mental health issues during times like this makes it even harder to go through. I know what you mean about seeing things that aren't there. I'd walk into a room, and say, "Where's Star?" and she would be sitting right in front of me. When I looked, I swear I saw an empty chair. The mind is crazy. It gives new meaning to a mind of its own

Some time has passed since you wrote this. I don't know when you'll see this but know that you are in my thoughts and prayers, and I'm sending good energy your way. I hope you're doing better. I look forward to hearing from you.

Aiva Raine

Mar 28, 2023 at 9:40pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I'm sorry for your loss. I know they are shitty sounding words that don't even attempt to fill or fix, but they're meant in sincerity.

Having lost several people the best advice I was ever given was when life gets too hard- take it at your own pace. If a day is too much- cope with an hour at a time. If that's too much, take it ten minutes at a time. If that's too much- then you deal with one minute at a time. Work through life and grief at your pace. And don't ever feel guilty because you feel sad. And if you can- find one positive in each chunk of time- even if it's something as little as the beauty of sunlight on a leaf or the softness of your shirt. And ask for help if you need it.

Elle

Mar 7, 2023 at 3:29pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

Aw, Charlie, I'm so sorry. It's a shit thing to go through whether it's sudden or not. And just because everyone goes through it, doesn't make it easier. It also doesn't take into account that you were closer to them than your parents. Nobody says 'Oh, everyone loses their parents eventually' do they? Surely not. And that's what's happened here really. I'm actually glad you've got an appointment with a professional tomorrow, because they might be able to help you with getting through that initial devastation.

When my dad lost his mother, he really struggled with his own lack of religion. As you say, there is some comfort in believing they've gone to a better place, been reunited with loved ones, that you'll see them again, and so on. For most of my life, Dad would say 'Religion is a crutch for the weak', but I definitely saw him struggle with the finality of it when he lost his mother, the person he was probably closest to.

My thoughts are with you.

1 Like

~Minja~

Mar 7, 2023 at 3:21pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

Crazy stuff, grief. If you want to talk about it, message me always.

1 Like

QPdoll

Mar 7, 2023 at 6:21am
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I understand what you mean about wanting to tell your grandmother something. I did the same thing after my grandmother passed. I was at home and the first thing I thought was to call grandma. I picked up the phone and realized that she wouldn't answer. It's so tough losing your grandparents, especially as close as you were. I don't have any magic words, but take care of yourself. It's what they would want.

1 Like

Waltz in the Lonesome October

Mar 6, 2023 at 10:31pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

Take care of yourself during this difficult time.

1 Like

Anni Pumpkin

Mar 6, 2023 at 9:06pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I know it doesn't help any, but I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine much worse than losing a parent or parental figure. They represent stability and safety, you grew up with them, and you've relied on them for most, if not all, of your life. You're right, the initial devastation will fade and things won't feel so fresh. But, as you know, grief never really goes away. It just becomes a permanent part of you.

It's horrible that you only got a couple days worth of bereavement! That's not even long enough for the shock to wear off enough to START grieving. I hope you have the support of someone else in your life to help you through this dark time. Take it easy on yourself in the mean time, that's all you really can do. Taking care of your physical self, eating and sleeping, is critical. Sleep deprivation and hunger will make things feel a million times worse than they actually are (which, for the record, is already pretty bad).

1 Like

Cinn

Feb 20, 2023 at 9:34pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I actually pretty much love this one. Nice, man...

Cinn

Feb 19, 2023 at 11:07am
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I'd say that more freedom for participants would attract more people. One obvious example that I've never understood is fiction vs poetry. If it's an activity, not a contest, why not allow people to explore whatever the theme of your activity is with whatever type of writing that want to do?

I've actually written for countless contests/activities over the years but never entered... because they inspired me, but I don't fit within the guidelines. Max rating too low, items required (book entries only over here), no poetry accepted, etc.

I know well why people restrict writers' freedom, but they're also restricting the number of participants they'll get. I still just take the inspiration where I can get it.

Elisa, Stik-or-Treat

Feb 19, 2023 at 10:26am
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I've had decent participation with Journalistic Intentions (even though I know my prompts are sometimes considered "difficult"). I do think that there's been a bit of a shift in regards to contests and activities, where people have been more open to admitting they find some setups too restricting or that they feel intimidated by contests. I would love to be in discussions to address those issues, but so far I haven't been invited.

November 29, 2019 at 12:33am

#970654

Don’t get me anything

Artist: Third Eye Blind
Song: I Want You
[Embed For Use By Upgraded+]

Prompt via "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS" : Write about gifting! What’s on your list? What do you have your eye on for yourself and what do you want to gift to your family and friends? Homemade or store bought? What was the best gift you ever received?

Back to posting at 12am WDC time because yolo.

I swear if I wait until the next day, it just won't get done. I'd be out of the challenge by the 4th of the month, legit.

But anyway, I'm not a gifter. You know how people always say, like, "Oh, I prefer to give gifts to my loved ones rather than to receive them." I don't feel that way. I'd rather neither of us get each other gifts because I can buy what I want with my money and you can buy what you want with yours.

If they're insisting, however...

For Christmas, I get my nieces gifts and that's it. Kira and I don't even exchange gifts. If I want to get myself something on July 8th, I'm going to. If she wants to get herself something on March 19th, she's welcome to. What I really, really don't understand is my adult family members who absolutely INSIST on exchanging gifts even though I've expressed that there are like 15 of us and it's better to use our money on the children.

Their response? "Well, if you don't want to get us anything, we understand..."

So, ya know what? Cool, you're not getting anything from me and if you insist on gifting me something (although I've repeatedly asked you not to), that's on you.

There's no feasible way for me to get gifts for every adult and child I interact with on the holidays. One year, I just got everyone a Christmas card and a $20 bill because I was so uncomfortable knowing they were going to get me something. I spent like over $600 on Christmas gifts with the cash gifts + legit gifts for the kids.

I know it was a lowkey dick move to just give everyone cash. Like, clearly no thought put into it, and the response was pretty much like, "Uh, thanks...?"

After that, I was just like, fuck it. I've said I don't want to do the adult gift exchange thing, I'm gonna use that money just on the kids. So I get them badass gifts now that cost like $200 each and spend the same amount of money.

It's not a money thing. Although I do think that if I'm going to spend money on gifts, I'd prefer to give them to children who don't have money of their own over someone who makes $50K a year more than me.

Yeah, yeah. I know it's the thought that counts. You don't gotta tell me.

But every time I move I run into this stuff people have gotten me for holidays (that I've asked them not to get me) and I'm just like, "Why though?"

I'll give you some examples: a 15-pound elephant nightlight that I literally never ever used, a sealed candle making kit, a giant magnet calendar like for a refrigerator, several bumper stickers (I don't put anything like that on my vehicle), a few bibles (I'm not religious), a motion-detected singing cat ornament, a few creepy angel cherub knick knacks, a sealed 1000 piece puzzle, many MANY many gag gifts (funny socks, book of bathroom jokes, donald trump magnet set, animal butt magnets, cat costumes, bamboozle jelly beans, daily calendar of insults)...

Do I need to continue?

Anyway, you're probably wondering why I don't just STFU and politely accept the gifts. Well, here's why:
1. It's awkward to get gifts without giving them in return, but I also don't have the mental capacity/time to try to figure out something for that many people.
2. I have to move all of this shit every time I switch apartments.

The last time I moved, Kira was like, okay, this is just ridiculous. We had an entire closet where we'd just been tossing these random gifts and then I had to go through and decide if I wanted to throw away people's hard earned money or move an obnoxiously large and awkward elephant light up and down a bunch of stairs into an apartment where I had no room for it.

I saw my family right after this move, which was during the summer, and very politely begged them: "Please, please don't get us any more Christmas gifts when the time comes around. I don't want to throw away your money, but we just literally have no room for these gifts in a one bedroom apartment. I would really rather just get the kids gifts and not receive any at all."

They said, "Well, if you want to throw away the gifts, then that's fine..."

I was like, "You don't understand. If you get me any more of these gifts, I'm literally going to throw them away in the dumpster before I even get to my apartment. I don't want them or have any use for them. Please use the money on a dinner for yourselves or on gifts for the children."

Guess who got an oversized desktop owl paperweight for Christmas 4 months later?

This guy.

No apology because my urge is genuine

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