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Are You Listening???

by Charlie ~

Rated: GC · Book · Emotional · #2181458

A journey of self-improvement - or not.

Sup? I'm Char.
You may know me from timeless classics such as

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#2030442 by Not Available.

and

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I blog for things like

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FORUM

30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS

(13+)
WDC's Longest Running Blog Competition - Hiatus
#1786069 by FivetricksterTreats

FORUM

JAFBG

(XGC)
Because real life isn't always roses and sunshine...
#2094931 by Elisa, Stik-or-Treat

[Embed For Use By Upgraded+]
Believin' all the lies that they're tellin' ya
Buyin' all the products that they're sellin' ya
They say jump and ya say "how high?"
Ya braindead, ya got a fuckin' bullet in ya head

Show Recent Comments

10 Most Recent Blog Comments:

👀intu the Darkness

Jul 22, 2023 at 8:05am
In response to "Invalid Entry"

Hey Char, It's been a while since I've touched base with you. I'm so sorry for your loss. The last thing people should say is everyone loses their grandparents eventually, or it will get better with time. It's the last thing you want to hear when you're hurting. Death sucks, long-lasting illness sucks! Having to decide to let the person go to keep them from suffering REALLY SUCKS! I think the only ones who can understand truly just how much are those who have had to make that decision. My heart breaks for you.

I'm not religious, but I do have a strong faith in God. I call myself spiritual because I don't agree with all the rules and regulations of religion. I do know I will see my family and friends again, and this is a great comfort. I can only imagine how much more painful the death of loved ones is without this belief. But you're right, it can't be faked. But it is a beautiful thing.

Having mental health issues during times like this makes it even harder to go through. I know what you mean about seeing things that aren't there. I'd walk into a room, and say, "Where's Star?" and she would be sitting right in front of me. When I looked, I swear I saw an empty chair. The mind is crazy. It gives new meaning to a mind of its own

Some time has passed since you wrote this. I don't know when you'll see this but know that you are in my thoughts and prayers, and I'm sending good energy your way. I hope you're doing better. I look forward to hearing from you.

Aiva Raine

Mar 28, 2023 at 9:40pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I'm sorry for your loss. I know they are shitty sounding words that don't even attempt to fill or fix, but they're meant in sincerity.

Having lost several people the best advice I was ever given was when life gets too hard- take it at your own pace. If a day is too much- cope with an hour at a time. If that's too much, take it ten minutes at a time. If that's too much- then you deal with one minute at a time. Work through life and grief at your pace. And don't ever feel guilty because you feel sad. And if you can- find one positive in each chunk of time- even if it's something as little as the beauty of sunlight on a leaf or the softness of your shirt. And ask for help if you need it.

Elle

Mar 7, 2023 at 3:29pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

Aw, Charlie, I'm so sorry. It's a shit thing to go through whether it's sudden or not. And just because everyone goes through it, doesn't make it easier. It also doesn't take into account that you were closer to them than your parents. Nobody says 'Oh, everyone loses their parents eventually' do they? Surely not. And that's what's happened here really. I'm actually glad you've got an appointment with a professional tomorrow, because they might be able to help you with getting through that initial devastation.

When my dad lost his mother, he really struggled with his own lack of religion. As you say, there is some comfort in believing they've gone to a better place, been reunited with loved ones, that you'll see them again, and so on. For most of my life, Dad would say 'Religion is a crutch for the weak', but I definitely saw him struggle with the finality of it when he lost his mother, the person he was probably closest to.

My thoughts are with you.

1 Like

~Minja~

Mar 7, 2023 at 3:21pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

Crazy stuff, grief. If you want to talk about it, message me always.

1 Like

QPdoll

Mar 7, 2023 at 6:21am
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I understand what you mean about wanting to tell your grandmother something. I did the same thing after my grandmother passed. I was at home and the first thing I thought was to call grandma. I picked up the phone and realized that she wouldn't answer. It's so tough losing your grandparents, especially as close as you were. I don't have any magic words, but take care of yourself. It's what they would want.

1 Like

Waltz in the Lonesome October

Mar 6, 2023 at 10:31pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

Take care of yourself during this difficult time.

1 Like

Anni Pumpkin

Mar 6, 2023 at 9:06pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I know it doesn't help any, but I'm so sorry for your loss. I can't imagine much worse than losing a parent or parental figure. They represent stability and safety, you grew up with them, and you've relied on them for most, if not all, of your life. You're right, the initial devastation will fade and things won't feel so fresh. But, as you know, grief never really goes away. It just becomes a permanent part of you.

It's horrible that you only got a couple days worth of bereavement! That's not even long enough for the shock to wear off enough to START grieving. I hope you have the support of someone else in your life to help you through this dark time. Take it easy on yourself in the mean time, that's all you really can do. Taking care of your physical self, eating and sleeping, is critical. Sleep deprivation and hunger will make things feel a million times worse than they actually are (which, for the record, is already pretty bad).

1 Like

Cinn

Feb 20, 2023 at 9:34pm
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I actually pretty much love this one. Nice, man...

Cinn

Feb 19, 2023 at 11:07am
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I'd say that more freedom for participants would attract more people. One obvious example that I've never understood is fiction vs poetry. If it's an activity, not a contest, why not allow people to explore whatever the theme of your activity is with whatever type of writing that want to do?

I've actually written for countless contests/activities over the years but never entered... because they inspired me, but I don't fit within the guidelines. Max rating too low, items required (book entries only over here), no poetry accepted, etc.

I know well why people restrict writers' freedom, but they're also restricting the number of participants they'll get. I still just take the inspiration where I can get it.

Elisa, Stik-or-Treat

Feb 19, 2023 at 10:26am
In response to "Invalid Entry"

I've had decent participation with Journalistic Intentions (even though I know my prompts are sometimes considered "difficult"). I do think that there's been a bit of a shift in regards to contests and activities, where people have been more open to admitting they find some setups too restricting or that they feel intimidated by contests. I would love to be in discussions to address those issues, but so far I haven't been invited.

December 14, 2020 at 12:00am

#1000201

Imagine me not eating chestnuts

"JAFBG" prompt: Congratulations! You get to kill one holiday song and never have to hear it again. Which will you choose?

"30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS" prompt: Every Christmas holiday we all sing about "Chestnuts roasting on an open fire...." But, have you ever roasted chestnuts!?

I've had quite a listless weekend. I agitated my own self with my previous blog entry and thought it better that I take a few days away lest I continue to pick at my past and become further engrossed in the concept.

Instead, I spent the week alternating between reading, napping, and watching movies. I completed my very first Goodreads review and I've been working on diversifying my feed there by making some friends. You can add me

if you have an account. Here’s my review

of Imagine Me Gone by Adam Haslett.

I only wish I'd made one sooner, after spending much of 2020 in isolation reading my weekends and free time away. I can hardly remember now anything that I read or any feelings I might have had in relation to those books. I don't know if that says more about me or about the books.

Regardless, I plan to keep up the hobby of reading at least one book a week. I've found it easy enough to read about 50-80 pages a day, depending on the material and where my mind is that day. I'm using Goodreads to help fill out my to-be-read list for "52 in 52"

, and I've joined a Goodreads book club on Discord that reads and discusses a new book each month. I'm simultaneously surprised and not surprised at all that I've not run into anything similar on WDC.

But onto the prompts... I've actually never seen anyone roasting chestnuts before. I don't even know what this would do to them. Does it soften them? Are they hard to begin with? Does roasting them change the texture? I can't imagine eating anything hard with my TMJ issues.

I've not enjoyed eating once since those muscles and joints started bothering me after my surgery this year. It's a miracle I don't starve. Even just the motion of chewing causes lightning-like pain in my jaw joints. I have constant tinnitus, which apparently over half of people with TMJ issues have as well.

Either way, suffice to say that I probably don't like chestnuts, roasted or otherwise.

I know the worst Christmas song too. It's Mariah Carey's cover of "All I Want for Christmas Is You." I dread it less now that I'm not working in retail, although I've been informed by my boss that the office actually plays Christmas music for all of November and December each year.

There are legitimately okay-ish holiday songs. This one, um, isn't one of them. It's played into the fucking ground every year. This song also has nothing to do with Christmas or the idea behind Christmas spirit. Not that I care much about that, but it's just a generic love song that uses the holiday in its lyrics and it's suddenly one of the best Christmas songs of all time?

Puh-lease.

Here's the deal with Christmas songs for me. My grandmother and I used to hang out all the time in the weeks leading up to Christmas, drinking hot cocoa, baking cookies, working on jigsaw puzzles, wrapping gifts, and yes, listening to Christmas music. I don't actually hate Christmas music as a whole. It reminds me of my grandmother and those memories with her.

My personal favorite was "Silent Night" and she enjoyed "O Come, All Ye Faithful" a lot.

Now my favorite is "Fairytale of New York" by the Pogues and I can't listen to those traditional Christmas songs because they make me sad.

“The monster you lie with is your own. The struggle is endlessly private. I thought it was over.”
~Adam Haslett, Imagine Me Gone

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