There is beauty in all things!
My Outlook on everyday things.
They say that the eyes are the door to your soul.
They can tell others if your happy, joyful, sad, angry, tired,
even lie or tell the truth, shall I go on or do you get the picture?
My day went kinda like this!
My girlfriend Kary had to tell me to breathe.
Way too much for one week.
It started with a text from my landlord on Monday, letting everyone know that the Sheldons were working on finances to purchase the properties, and she would let us know if and when she had a date that it would be final. Wednesday, she texted us that it would become final today! They SOLD the property that has 4 townhouses and two single-story houses on it. She says that nothing should change except ownership.
I have a horrible feeling about this. I meet them during the walk-through, which truly they had already purchased and had not seen all of them. He asked her if all appliances stayed, and I said no! Because she said yes! I politely said the washer/dryer is mine, the clothes rod, and the two lights outside. He rudely said, good, because we don't supply them. He turned and walked away. Not a good sign. One of the other families had to buy a new washer and dryer two days ago, because of it.
This morning she texted us and said it was final. She was no longer our landlord. Why I'm so worried is that she had worked out a very reasonable rent for me to have a place to live. I know that the house I have can go for $200 more than what I'm paying. I'm on a budget and will have to move if they raise the rent, which I was planning on in June/July. My finances are not quite ready for the move. Waiting for the other shoe to drop on this one.
I know that God has a plan. Boy, do I wish I knew what was going to happen. It would be so much better on my body.
Now for what happened today. I had made plans to have lunch with some friends. It has been over a year since I have eaten out. While we had lunch, I was going to have my oil changed in my car. Ya, know, kill two birds with one stone. They told me $50; ok cool, I could handle that. It was long overdue.
We went to Applebee's. No menus, no salt or pepper shakers or condiments on the tables. Due to covid! Our food came, and our waitress took off without asking if we needed anything. Found another waitress to get the salt and ketchup, she went and told our waitress what we needed. That took her 10 minutes because she was in the kitchen waiting on the other table's food.
When she placed the plate with the salt packets on it, she walked away with the ketchup. My friends busted out laughing because I had this devastating look on my face. She returned a couple of seconds and wondered why we were laughing. I told her, never mind, they're laughing at me.
I ordered a riblet basket with fries. The riblets were mostly fat, and when the manager walked up and asked if everything was ok, my friend said no. Her ribs are mostly fat. He went and made me a to-go box filled with ribs.
When we got to the dealership, he gave me the estimates of some things I had asked for, including the oil change. They total a whopping $822, not happening! As we are walking to pay for the bill, I see $100. My anxiety kicks in! We walk up to the cashier, and I tell her that I just wanted an oil change today. That I didn't want the thermostat done today, just an estimate. She looks at the paperwork he gave me and said, that's your estimates, ma'am.
Gezzz, I said! Shaking my head, trying to shake off this strange feeling I'm getting. The room is spinning, I start to sweat, and I'm no sweater, peeps. My hands are starting to shake. Kary grabs me to steady me on my feet as I lean against the counter.
It's too late; I'm in a full-blown panic attack. I have only had a two in ten years. This is my third. I get calmed down, and he leads us to my car. We leave the parking lot, and at the stop sign, I'm looking at my bill. I couldn't remember what she said it was. But I knew it wasn't what I was told it would be. They put 10 quarts of oil in my car! I asked Kary to review it line by line as I'm driving. She reads it off, and there's no oil filter... lol. Ok, I'll call them when I get home. I got back $15, yeah me!
The bad thing about my panic/anxiety attacks they don't wear off for a few days. They make me sick at my stomach, I'll have a Crohn's attack, difficulty breathing, and I get the shakes. Having autoimmune diseases suck a lot. You never know which one will show up to the party on that day. Sometimes one, maybe two, will join you. Or one will leave, and another one arrives. Sometimes they stay, and sometimes they go away until they decide to show off. You're fortunate if none show up for the day.
But, I count my blessings. I am breathing, I have extra ribs for dinner tomorrow, and I have my $15 back. GOD is GOOD!
As you could tell by my post yesterday that..., I'M BACK !!!
My doctor was the one who ended up giving me the correct medicine, and at that, it was a guessing game after all the tests that they ran on me at the ER. I'm telling you I'm so discouraged to go to the ER in my town.
Here are all the tests they ran: heart attack, stroke, cancer, covid, pneumonia, blood clots in my heart, lungs, and brain. They all come back negative, AWESOME news! Here's what they didn't do, listen to my heart or lungs with a stethoscope. But, most importantly, they didn't listen to me. My oxygen was at 88%. My doctor had me rushed to the ER 20 miles away. By the time I got there and back into the room, my rate went back up. I repeatedly told them that I only have the issue when I exerted myself, getting up, walking around, taking Fable out to potty, checking the mail, fixing food, etc. They told me that they would have me get up and walk around the nurse's station to witness what was going on if the covid test comes back negative. Never happened! Very disappointed in my care that night.
At least my doctor listened to my heart and lungs. She decided that we would try a few medications to see if it was an upper respiratory infection, although my lungs were clear on the test ran at the ER, and she said they sounded good. We figured it was due to all the pollen floating around in the air. Now, I have to wear a mask at all times when outdoors or out shopping and running errands. LegendaryMask💗 rides again...
The most important thing right now is that I finally got the care I needed, and I am on the road to recovery, just in time to have to move. My current landlord just sold the home that I live in right now last week, along with five others. Now, I will be upping my move to Arkansas 4 months earlier than planned. At least I'm well enough to pack and get things ready for it now.
I'm ready to rock and roll again on WdC!!! I have so many things planned for April it ain't funny. If you haven't notice that I'm showing up in "Anniversary Reviews" I missed being able to give as many reviews like I use to due to my health concerns. But, I am getting to help Same Ol' Sum1 dish out MB's and GP's. I'm having a blast. So, if you haven't checked "Anniversary Reviews" out lately maybe you should.
Hugzzzz and love to ya'll,
“The Loss of a Loved One”
When you have lost a loved one and the knowledge that life will be so hard
without them in it and no matter how much it hurts.
Remember, when the grief fades, you will still have the memories.
Treasure them. It’s a gift from God!
Yesterday was downtime for me by ways of nature. It rained almost all day, shutting my electronics down. No, television, no wifi, and spotty phone service. That’s ok. It gave me time to reflect on what day it was. Eventually, that is after I woke from a few much-needed naps.
When I would have service, I’d make the calls I needed and check emails and such. But, two significant phone calls would turn out to be a blessing in disguise. The first was my dad, and I called to check on him. He had a heart attack about a month ago. I needed to see how his progress had been.
My dad is not much of a talker on the phone. But, yesterday, he wanted to talk, well, ask a lot of questions, that is… lol. We haven’t been involved in each other’s lives for 38 years much, mostly off and on. I try to call him every two weeks now, that way we have things to talk about. He asked where I lived and about my sons and how old my grandchildren are and what they were doing. He realized it had been 38 years since he had seen my sons and me. Made me sad in many ways that we had let the time slip away from us.
He has lived in Alaska for the past five years or so which I had no idea he had moved, until four months ago when I called him about my baby brother. Which my brother had given me dad’s new number before he had his bypass surgery.
I know that some of you have family secrets stored in the closet. You know which closet. The one labeled Secrets enter at your own risk! So, most of us throw them in and slam the door shut, sometimes nailing it shut and live with the consequences, and there are plenty of those going around. Most of them need to be aired out and patch up the cracks in the family wall, that's spliting apart.
It hadn’t dawned on me what day it was until after I called my baby sister and told her that dad wants to come to see his children. She was curious about what that meant because most of the time, he cancels seeing us and does something else with his other family. I told her that I wasn’t reading anything into it. It was the thought that counts, right now. He slurs his words, and it is difficult to understand him sometimes. I have tried repairing the damage done by others in the family, but it is hard when that person is long gone. The lies told ripped through my family 38 ½ years ago like a machete slicing through the grass on a hot summer’s day. Actually, a little blood dripping from it a time or two, which is very heartbreaking to most involved.
As we reminisced about years gone by, she asked me, “If I called because of the anniversary?”
“What anniversary?” And as soon as it left my mouth, I knew! I started to cry. She knew that moment I remembered.
“You know it’s been 39 years!” She says.
“I choked back the tears and said, “Yes, and it’s hard to believe it. I can’t believe I called dad today of all days. No wonder he was more talkative than usual. That is if he remembered the day. She asked me why he was? I told her he had to go and promised to call me back, and I thought sure if he remembers too. I told her 15 minutes later he did. My dad has called me three times in 39 years. This meant a lot to me, and as he hung up, he said that he loved me! It’s a big deal coming from him.
When you have a loved one’s loss, especially the glue to your family, it is tough to mend it back to what it once was. I mourned my mom’s death for many years. Did things to celebrate and remember her in ways that my sons would know her. But, I had little to go on because they were so young when she died. Heck, I was 22.4 years old. Never in my life did I think I would be without her, let alone my son’s and their children. Mom’s are supposed to live forever.
And she does in my heart! You may use the quote I wrote if you wish because everyone suffers a loss, and we suffered a lot in 2020. The pain, grief, and sorrow that we have out shadows the memories we have of our loved ones. I realized at that moment when my sister reminded me of the date that I had finally stopped grieving and started remembering only the love and memories of my mom. I was finally at peace with knowing that I will see her again one day.
We all process our grief in our own way and time. Everyone’s circumstances are different. So, don’t let anyone tell you to cowboy up and move on. You do have to remember that you have to live for them and tell their stories. You can't let it take you out of other's lives or everyone loses. I'm not saying you can't grief, but you have to live. That is what they would want you to do. I didn’t think I would ever get to a point that I was at peace with it and knowing that I would be okay. She’s just on vacation waiting for me to join God, her, and the rest of the family. The biggest thing is to remember the memories and try not to let them outweigh the pain of your loss. Getting past the grief is a big step in moving forward in your life. It has been 39 years for one of the greatest losses in my life and probably the hardest yet. It was a gradual process for me, but I can say that I am finally at peace.
I have had family losses in the many years since, and they too have left scars and memories to bear, but I know that the scars will disappear and the memories will emerge with a great love for those who have left us and knowing that we will be reunited once more.
My prayer for you today! Is that you always look up and ask God to wrap His loving arms around you at all times. The sense of His loving arms and their strength about you will give you the peace in your heart you need.
May God bless you and keep you. May He give you love, comfort, strength, faith, hope, and the ultimate peace with your loss and all things in your life. In our Heavenly Father’s name, Amen.
The Loneliness "Death of a Marriage, be it Death or Divorce."
by Teresa Blakely
I have a dear friend who has suffered her husband's death a few months before the pandemic, and she had posted about widowhood. Widowhood comes in all shapes and sizes and does not discriminate against males or females. Although in my case, I was married 35 years and divorced. I mourn the death of my marriage, still today after 10 years, and I feel and have felt the things she describes in her post. To fill that emptiness and void can be hard some days. God gets me through them and a handful of people I talk to about separation anxiety. That's the best way I know how to describe it.
It's hard for others to understand if they don't know what it's like. And 2020 was very difficult to get through the loneliness of not having a spouse there to get through it together, like all the other experiences before. Reaching out to someone helps, but you don't want to feel like a burden to anyone. Trust me. I've been there, and I know that feeling. It has gotten better in some areas, like going out to eat alone, but I would prefer to eat with someone. It does have it's moments.
Like so many others, having been married for a very long time, it is like it died. And in reality, it did for me, and I'm sure it has for others. Your spouse has alright been through it, already adjusted to being without you. In their mind, it was over years earlier. They just didn't know how to tell you without hurting you. In the long run, they end up hurting you even more than they wanted to. Divorce is an ugly dragon rearing its head to devour its prey. No matter who it is. It does not care!
I wanted to share this with you because it sums up the loneliness that one can experience in a death of a marriage. May it be by death of a spouse or death of a divorce. It consumes us never the less. I hope this touches your heart and gives you peace that you are not alone in this feeling.
by Alisha Bozarth
“Widowhood is more than missing your spouse’s presence. It is adjusting to an alternate life. It is growing around a permanent amputation.
Widowhood is going to bed for the thousandth time, and still, the loneliness doesn’t feel normal. The empty bed a constant reminder. The night no longer brings intimacy and comfort, but the loudness of silence and the void of connection.
Widowhood is walking around the same house you have lived in for years, and it no longer feels like home. Because “home” incorporated a person. And they’re not there. Homesickness fills your heart, and the knowledge that it will never return haunts you.
Widowhood is seeing all your dreams and plans you shared as a couple crumble around you. The painful process of searching for new dreams that include only you amounts to climbing Mount Everest. And every small victory of creating new dreams for yourself includes a new shade of grief that their death propelled you to this path.
Widowhood is second-guessing everything you thought you knew about yourself. Your life had molded together with another’s, and without them, you have to relearn all your likes, hobbies, fears, goals. The renaissance of a new person makes you proud and heartbroken simultaneously.
Widowhood is being a stranger in your own life. The unnerving feeling of watching yourself from outside your body, going through the motions of what was your life, but being detached from all of it. You don’t recognize yourself. Your previous life feels but a vapor long gone; like a mist of a dream, you begin to wonder if it happened at all.
Widowhood is the irony of knowing if that one person was here to be your support, you would have the strength to grieve that one person. The thought twists and confuses you. If only they were here to hold you and talk to you, you’d have the tenacity to tackle this unwanted life. To tackle the arduous task of moving on without them.
Widowhood is missing the one person who could truly understand what is in your heart to share. The funny joke, the embarrassing incident, the fear compelling you, or the frustration tempting you. To anyone else, you would have to explain, and that is too much effort, so you keep it to yourself. And the loneliness grows inside you.
Widowhood is struggling with identity. Who are you if not their spouse? What do you want to do if not the things you planned together? What brand do you want to buy if not the one you two shared for all those years? What is your purpose if the job of investing in your marriage is taken away? Who is my closest companion when my other half isn’t here?
Widowhood is feeling restless because you lost your home, identity, partner, lover, friend, playmate, travel companion, co-parent, security, and life. And you are drifting with an unknown destination.
Widowhood is living in a constant state of missing the most intimate relationship. No hand to hold. Nobody next to you. No partner to share your burden.
Widowhood is being alone in a crowd of people. Feeling sad even while you’re happy. Feeling guilty while you live. It is looking back while moving forward. It is being hungry, but nothing sounding good. It is every special event turning bittersweet.
Yes. It is much more than simply missing their presence. It is becoming a new person, whether you want to or not. It is fighting every emotion mankind can feel at the very same moment and trying to function in life at the same time.
Widowhood is frailty. Widowhood is strength. Widowhood is darkness. Widowhood is rebirth.
Counting Our Blessings
As I sit here watching Christmas movies one after another, wishing I had my family around me to enjoy them even more. It has been a year and a half for us all and to enjoy each other’s company means so much more than usual. It goes to show you that every moment you spend with a loved one or a friend should be cherished.
I have reconnected with old friends, new family members through genealogy, ex-in-laws, and even rekindled with old family members. I was blessed with a phone call from my dad this afternoon. However, I’ve called him several times this year. He called me! My dad is one of those that if you don’t call me, you must be too busy and I don’t want to bother you. I called him on the 23rd and found out that he had had a heart attack last week and was going to his check up on the 24th. I told him that I would call him back in a few days to find out his results. He decided to call me instead. Which was a prayer I was blessed with today.
I have witnessed too much heartache this year from friends and family that didn’t get to say goodbye to loved ones. I lost two very dear friends on December 6th to covid. One I had spoken to just a month before. I got to tell her how much I missed her and her sisters. The other a mentor from church, my Brother Louis. I hadn’t talked to him in a year. It saddens my heart that much time had gone by, and neither of us had called each other. He had taken me under his wing and taught me things about the Bible that no other person had been able to open my eyes to see. They both will be missed by all who knew them.
Then a few days later, a friend posted on Facebook that his aunt had passed away. It was the saddest news he had to tell others. With our busy schedules and life, we tend to lose contact with those who truly matter to us. He went on to tell his friends that the authorities had found his aunt frozen to death because she was homeless. She had lost her job and eventually her home and ended up on the streets where she died one night.
Life is so precious, and most of us take it for granted that they will be there tomorrow. We even take that we will be here tomorrow. Nothing is promised to us except eternal life with our Heavenly Father. He begged us to remember to contact our loved ones as much as possible and to tell them that you love them.
We must tell each other how important we are to each other because tomorrow is not promised. I tried today to contact everyone who matters to me. I’m sure that I might have missed someone. I was on the phone from 8 am to 8 pm this evening, wishing my loved ones (family and friends) a Merry Christmas. To know me is to be loved by me.
God gave us His son today (those many years ago) to love us unconditionally for all times. It is amazing how we take advantage of that love that is so freely given to us. There is a lesson to learn here. Life is precious, and you need to grab it and hang on to it for as long as you are allowed to have it. Today I was so blessed by all the love that was poured out to me by family, friends, but most of all, they all know that they matter to me.
If you didn’t get a text from me or a phone call, it’s probably because I don’t have it.
Here is your hugzzzz and love from me now!
I wish ya’ll a very Merry Christmas and a prosperous New Year.
| This has been a year and a half rolled up into one gigantic year filled with mixed emotions. I am trying to stay positive, but I do have to rant some today. I can't help it. I had some very painful news last night, and I can't help but feel like it could have been prevented.
I lost two extraordinary people in my life last night due to covid. I hate that word with a passion and cringe every time I use it. I also found out that six more of my church family has it; they are in their 60's and 70's. At the same time, other church members have been in quartine for the last two weeks. I love these people very much and pray that they all get better. This isn't even counting my WdC family, who has been tested positive for it as well.
I know that most of them have taken precautions in protecting themselves against this thing. I have tried everything to protect myself and pray that I don't fall to this virus. I had been sick this past week myself, but I was run down, and like an idiot, I drove 5 hours with my side windows down for Fable, who later I found out the reason why she was so hot. I'm very blessed that I didn't get it, and it was only the flu.
Why is it so hard for others to wear the dang mask? I know I'm taking your right away to do what you want to do! But, if you don't follow the guidelines, it could cost you your life or someone you love, maybe even like.
It causes me pain to say that you are a selfish person then. Not, to follow the guidelines in preventing this not to spread more than it should. Only selfish people think about themselves first and not others. I don't particularly like wearing them either, but I do because I have to take all precautions due to not having an immune system that works properly. I tried explaining it to one lady last week she brushed me off. I wanted to bop her across the back of the head, a Gibbs slap. She had no concern for me or anyone else except for herself—such disrespect for others' welfare.
Maybe I'm too selfish myself wanting to protect other's welfare and my own that I didn't consider what it was doing to her. Maybe she has anxiety about wearing it, I do too, but I also have more anxiety if I don't wear one—the flip side of the coin, you might say. I get hot in them and panic thinking I can't breathe in it. But, I know that if I take it off, I will get sick.
I went out to eat a couple of weeks before Thanksgiving and forgot to take my mask. The place was empty, up to our last 10 minutes there. It became packed with people. The tables were only two feet apart. I ended up with the flu. It is the last place I will eat out at until this virus is gone. I love being alive too much, and it isn't worth me dying over a piece of fried catfish.
So, you tell me, is it worth knowing that someone you care for dies from you not protecting yourself for them or even protecting yourself to live for them? My friends left many loved ones behind, and I know that they wore masks and done other protective measures to protect themselves and others from getting this virus. But, they did get it from somewhere or someone they came in contact with.
I pray that we all make it through this winter season without losing anymore loved ones to this virus.
Remember to MASK UP and SANITIZE before coming in contact with others. Do what my daughter Kala does every time she goes out and comes home. She would shower and change her clothes before hugging me. My son Eric said that's their normal routine now. No one hugs until they are sanitized. I love them both so much they consistently worried about me while I was there. Setting good examples for their daughters and others who they care about, even total strangers.
I have had too many emotions this year, from sad to joyous to devastation—a few happy moments in between all of this mayhem. I can't help but think that not everyone could have such a bad year with things going upside down and crazy things happening that would've never happened normally. I know that it has been challenging for everyone, and I pray that we will get through this together and with lots of prayers.
Take care of yourselves and your family this winter season, and remember, I love you.
Yours truly, LegendaryMasK
WHAT, did you just say?
We took our Thanksgiving break at families in Arkansas this year since it would be our first visit during the covid quarantine. Fable was to meet my youngest son Eric and his family for the first time, and she was to meet my oldest son's stepchildren. Jeremy and Tami were here when my niece brought her to me in July. Along with meeting them, she would meet Kooper, Kaiser, Marlin, and Gunner, my fur grandsons. My granddaughter Shelby had adopted a black Lab (Roxy) a few months ago, and we both would get to welcome her into the family during our trip. We would be attending Ana's birthday party on Sunday at Jeremy's as well.
Our trip over was a little stressed Fable isn't used to riding in a car during long trips. She was used to riding in a cage, and there was no way that it would fit in the back of my Mustang. I rolled the side windows down for her to get fresh air and enjoy the ride a little better as she likes to ride around town with them down. She paced a lot on the way over, and every noise woke her up when we would pass a vehicle or a truck would pass by us.
Eric is in the middle of a major remodel, and if you have ever been in a major construction zone, you know how chaotic it can be. We helped out when we could and cleaned up where needed. The feast was enough food for an Army. We ate on the patio and froze after 10 minutes because the sun went behind the houses on the hill. I went inside, hoping not to get sick. The fur babies had fun, and everyone had plenty to eat. Gunner and Marlin were left at home because six dogs in one house under construction would be way too much to deal with.
The birthday party was small due to covid Ana only had family members in attendance. Turning nine, she was a little disappointed but soon forgot that her friends could not attend. We all made up for it with games, gifts, and singing. She shared her icing flowers with me, and no one else. Since I could not have any cake, it was a beautiful Unicorn cake. Krogers did an amazing job on it for $25. for the same cake, Walmart wanted $65 for it. We swapped the fur babies out in the bedrooms because it was only 30*+ in the garage, so we split time up with them. Gunner is a little jealous of other dogs, so we had to swap them around, giving each time with the family.
While we were in Arkansas, I looked at places to live and realized that it would be a little harder than I thought. We spent 3 days looking at places and areas that would be safe for Fable and me to live. I will eventually find the right place at the right time, in God's timing and Grace.
We had a great time during our stay, and it was very short in a way, but we were so ready to get home. Fable was a gem on the way home, and of course, the side windows were down for her, and the heat was up for me. I decided to treat her to a little car picnic. It would've been outside, but we picked the coldest day in the South to travel. We hit wind, rain, and even snow once we reached Mississippi. We had a blast sitting in the car and people watching. Fable sat patiently, waiting for her fries to be handed to her. It was a pure joy to see her watching others. She is so sweet and a joy to have.
I had a little surprise a few hours after we got home. I was putting things away and started dinner for us. I reached into the kitchen cabinet and rammed my left shoulder into the cabinet door that I thought was totally opened. I hurt so bad that it redamaged my shoulder from the accident with Fable several months ago. I was shaking it off when I looked down and saw blood on the floor. Fresh blood! I took off my sweater and top shirt, finding that I hadn't punctured my arm. So, where did the blood come from?
I checked everywhere on Fable and myself and found no blood. It kind of freaked me out. It wasn't there when I got home. I did find my backdoor unlocked while inspecting everything out. My neighbor had forgotten to relock it when she went out of it. Was someone in my house and I didn't know it? I checked every room and closet, not a soul in sight. We went to bed after dinner. We both were exhausted after a long day of traveling.
The next morning I found more blood on the floor. This time it was more than the night before. What was going on? Now, I'm really starting to freak out. Fable reminded me she needed to go outside desperately. Off we went. I was going to have to look harder where the blood had come from. Fable did her touring of the yard and eventually picked her spot to relieve herself. We trotted to the backdoor, and I glanced down at her, and I could see she was a little disappointed not to spend a little more time outside. I told her I'd give her 10 minutes before we had to go in. She trotted back out to the yard, searching for more evidence that her yard was intact the way she had left it a week ago.
That's when I noticed that she had blood running down the backside. I panicked, seeing that the blood was coming from my baby girl. I immediately took her in and cleaned her up to see where she was bleeding. I called my niece, no answer. She was at work. I texted her one little sentence. In the meantime, I went to the store to get supplies and get Fable some treats and a few other things. She replied to my text about four hours later.
Jess: WHAT, did you just say? No, F$%ing way!
Me: I replied, I'm sure of it.
Jess: Kim told me she spayed her!
Me: NOPE, she didn't!!!
We talked after she had gotten off work and had determined that Kim probably had planned on getting Fable spayed, but during her divorce, she probably was sidetracked, and she had passed away unexpectedly. My fur baby is not spayed like we had been told. My baby girl is being extra pampered, and momma is on guard duty for the next few weeks. Who knew I would have such a surprise like this! Here's to all the 2020 surprises we have gotten so far this year. I truly hope there aren't any more big surprises in store for us.
Love ya'll and hope you had an amazing Thanksgiving like we did.
P.S. I forgot to tell you the one-sentence I sent to my niece.
Me: Guess Who is in HEAT?
My Journey with Autoimmune Diseases: Brain Fog and Blurry Vision
I want to share my experience with brain fog and blurry vision. It could be something entirely different other than the usual things doctors think they could be. Like for example, my optometrist thought I might have a brain tumor. I thank God that it was something I ate, something so simple that no one ever guessed it.
I had been getting sicker these past three years than I had in a very long time. Especially my eyesight and memory seemed to be getting worse every day. I had no idea about Hashimoto’s or, matter of fact, any other Autoimmune diseases. Although I had suffered from them all my life, it turns out. The difficult years have been the past three years. I have been fighting brain fog, extreme dry eye, hot flashes, and everything in between.
I’d moved in with my son in 2015 until I could find a place of my own, but in the meantime, he lost his job. We decided that I would stay until he found a new job, which meant that we were only living on my SSI income. We had to cut corners on everything, and that included eating what was cheaper. At that time, I was diagnosed with Hashimoto's that same year, and the doctor never told me what I had to do. I didn't know about autoimmune diseases or the special diets that I was supposed to be on, so we eat dirt cheap, eggs, pancakes, top ramen, spaghetti, etc. All the things that I shouldn't be eating. I didn't lose an ounce of weight; instead, I ballooned to a whopping, well I won't say. But, I fluctuated back and forth from one extreme to another. Due to my diet mostly.
During the next five years, I would battle extreme brain fog, and it continued to worsen by the day. I also was losing my vision. It was different from day-to-day. Until last August, I was driving, and my vision blurred so badly a ran into the ditch. I was going to my eye doctor, of all things. Of course, he blamed it on TEDS he had been treating me for it for the past year. I started with extremely dry eyes at first and then developed ocular migraines and was getting worse by the day.
In February of this year, I dove off the deep end and did an extreme detox of my body. After two years of knowing what my body was battling. I found a doctor who was willing to help me better understand what was going on. He told me I had to detox myself in order to find my triggers completely. After seven weeks, I was detoxed, it was a hard journey, but I made it and was very proud of myself. I lost 47 pounds finally. I didn't have a migraine or blurry vision during the last four weeks.
The first week I decided to have my usual breakfast. Gluten-free, of course! I had toast, two eggs, and fried potatoes. Five minutes after I ate, I developed a severe migraine and passed out. I woke up 4 hours later, still with a slight migraine and blurry vision. Now, I have to figure out what the trigger was?
I decided to eat just three hard-boiled eggs the next morning because the gluten-free bread and potatoes had been on my diet. I blacked out again after eating them. Eggs were my trigger! I woke up four hours later, still with a slight migraine and blurry vision. Since then no more eggs and my brain fog has decreased back to almost normal... Yeah! My vision is increasing more every day, and I'm off all the medications he had prescribed, and no more eye plugs to help with the dry eye. My migraines only come around when I've eaten something that has gluten or eggs in it, or I'd been cross-contaminated. Oh, and the blurry vision returns as well.
There are reasons why brain fog, migraines, blurred vision happens. Just getting to the root of it is a journey well spent. Detoxing was my key to the answer. You don't have to stay there. It takes taking control of our bodies. I give it to God through many prayers, and He gives me hope, love, and the strength I need to get through this.
I have had seven autoimmune diseases in my lifetime. I didn't know that until this past year after doing some research about autoimmune diseases. By having one autoimmune disease you can develop more than one, in a lifetime. Battling this together with the support of God, my family, and the autoimmune group that I am a part of has helped me tremendously.
Note: In my autoimmune group, I wrote this so others would better understand the pain that one suffers from silent diseases and autoimmune diseases. Although some do complain to get attention, ones with silent diseases and autoimmune are really in pain. Here is how most of us who suffer from them feel. Most people dread to ask them how they feel because they feel you complain too much.
Nobody knows the unseen pain that some are in and will never understand it. When they ask you how you are doing and you say you're in pain they say you're a complainer, but when something bad happens they ask you why didn't you say something. One should not have to lie about how they are feeling because they are afraid you will stop talking or loving them. It is a vicious cycle for those who have unseen diseases. Many people walk away from them not understanding that is when their friendship and love are needed the most. ~Teresa Blakely
|I don't usually do politics, but I can't stand by and not voice my opinion about this. Please, don't judge me for my decisions and I don't judge yours, for that is not mine to do so. Only God can do that. I want to keep this civil and not blow up WdC with hateful comments. This is my opinion, and those that I know personally feel the same. I even talked with my older sister this morning about it. She told me that it did not concern her, and after what I said. She even changed her mind and agreed on it.
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President Trump needs our help to save our country!
We are not finished with this race, folks. We can’t give up; President Trump isn’t! He needs to know that we are still behind him. President Trump saw that on November 3rd, he saw more people standing behind him than he has in the last four years. He is fighting for our “Freedom” and a way of life that no other country has.
He knows what it takes to run a business, and the United States is a business, no matter how you look at it. He has shown us his faith, his heart, what he wants for our land. Our land needs to heal, and the only way to do this is to have an honest, God-fearing man as Commander and Chief of our country. You don’t honestly know the man except through what has been said by the other side. Gossip is the worst enemy there is. I know from experience it breaks a person’s spirit; it steals their identity, tears families apart, separates friends, and defames their character.
There is one thing I can say about Trump; he says what he thinks, and he says what he means. He loves this country, and you can’t say that he doesn’t. It is in his voice, actions, and chiseled in his face. You might not agree with everything he does, but did you believe the past Presidents. No, no-one has ever agreed 100% with one. We all have our opinions. Most of us say our differences to family and friends. President Trump voices his more to his country than most presidents have in the past. Although they probably voiced their opinions, but not to the country. President Trump doesn’t sugarcoat it for us. He wants us to know what is going on.
He is trying to do what is best for the whole country. Not for the government, like so many politicians who only seek what is good for them, selfish, greedy people. He has done so much for this country. If it were left up to me, he would stay our Commander and Chief for a very long time because he is making a change for all and not only us but for more countries that need our help. He will make sure that our country heals its wounds that so many wicked politicians destroyed.
If we give up now, we give up what our forefathers fought for. What our family members died for, the ones that fought for our freedom and protection. I have generations that have served this great nation who gave their lives to defend it, actually from the beginning of the United States. I’m telling you they did not die in vain, but you who decided to go with the other person sure have made it so. You have just spat on every American who died for this country. You disgrace those who fought for your independence, which you just gave to them.
Supposedly you decide to go with that other person, which by the way, I don’t know one person who voted for them. We will no longer be a free country. You have just changed our status to a (non-free) communist country. We will be in chaos more than we have been these past ten months. You have endangered so many families and so many other people; you have no idea what you have done.
You have truly forgotten what our forefathers founded this great nation for religion, liberty, justice, and to be free from the clutches of England and many other countries whose Kings were tyrants? Maybe everyone should revisit the history of how they started this country. There are incredible documentaries that are up to date on the facts. I learned things that I wasn’t taught in school, but that, of course, was many years ago. We may not have schools anymore, putting our country on the brink of literacy and where other countries want to see us fail. You have just handed them the keys to your home to my home. How dare you take that right from my family and me!
I plead with you to stand with President Trump to fight for our country. There are four points that we need to do to help him. You will need to humble yourself, pray without seizing, seek God’s face, and turn from your wicked ways. We can make this country great again; that is President Trump’s goal. This country is set on Biblical principles by our forefathers. We stood ideally by while they took God out of schools, our allegiance to our country, working on taking it out of our government, and they are trying to take our rights away to have freedom of religion, to bear arms and speech. We took all those things out and looked where it had gotten us, a civil war upon us, against family and friends.
You have a voice, and now is the time to speak up. We didn’t speak up when God was taken out in our schools, and look where that has gotten us! Why stay silent when God has given us the time to speak out against the evil going on right now. We can stay quiet and think that it doesn’t concern us. Wrong, we cannot remain silent on this matter. God is what we need back in this country, back in our lives, back in schools, businesses, and our government. We need to step up and use our voices against those who want to harm us. Enough is enough!
Don’t let our forefather’s sacrifices go unwarranted and costly to those left behind without their loved ones. It is a cost they were and are still willing to pay for, for the greater good. We have to stand up, folks, and fight like there is no tomorrow. Because there might not be for some of us, some could be your family members who will be lost. Lost because we didn’t stand up to the tyrants in our country.
They say freedom isn’t free, and it isn’t, but we can’t stop fighting for what is right, for we all lose then.
Positivity breeds beautiful things. Let beauty surround you today and always!
Keeping negative things at bay. There is so much negativity going on right now, especially the Presidential race. I need to walk away from it and get some positive stuff in my life right now. It's been a very rough month and a half for my family right now. With a brother and sister having bypass surgeries within a few weeks apart. We need some smiles and laughter in our lives. May your day be filled with nothing else but love and happiness.