Thanks for sharing this story. It was very well written and was clear and concise. The dialogue was very clear and you could always tell who was talking. The build up to the climax was nice and the joke at the end was both funny and executed well. There were no grammatical errors I could see and I enjoyed reading this very much much.
Welcome Caterina! I see you are new here and would like to welcome you to Writing.com. I hope you have a great time in this lovely community. Firstly, I would like to say that this is a lovely poem, so thank you for sharing. You have a nice structure and form to it that allows it to flow, and the rhyme scheme works with the rhythm for most of the poem. The language was eloquent and the subject matter was interesting. It is a very metaphorical poem that has enough details to be precise, but is also vague enough in some parts that the reader can interpret it in their own way. It was written very well and is overall a great poem. The only thing I would suggest would be to focus a little more on the phrasing and make sure the lines fit together and flow better, rhythmically. But overall it was a wonderful poem.
Thank you for sharing this poem, it was a great read. The way you composed the poem, was interesting and while it allows for some personal interpretation, it also is very clear and decisive about what the subject matter is. It was interesting to read, and starts the mind thinking about the matter at hand. There are no grammatical errors that I can see. Overall, it was well written and enjoyable to read.
This is a sweet, lighthearted poem that makes you think about happy times and good memories. It seems simple but has an undertone of eloquence and it flows very well. The rhyme scheme adds nicely to the flow, and it's a great, short little read. The grammar was very consistent and I see no mistakes. Thanks for sharing your poem.
This was a beautifully written piece about nature that is really sweet and calming. The repetition added a nice aspect of familiarity and constant while your description of your surroundings were exquisite. It is a very lovely poem that shows you to appreciate nature and the simple things. There were a few grammatical errors in some lines but nothing too major. Just make sure you keep the grammar constant throughout the lines. Other thank that it flowed very well and was very enjoyable to read. Thanks for sharing.
This was a really interesting read that really makes you think. It was a deep topic and the poem was crafted around it well. While for the most part it flowed well, there were some parts that were choppy because you cut off the phrase and moved them to separate lines. You probably wanted a certain line length or syllable count or something along those lines, but try not to sacrifice flow and readability if you don't have to. Despite this, it was still readable and enjoyable. Thanks for posting this lovely poem.
This was such a heartfelt, lovely poem. The emotion and feeling behind it really gives off an impact on the reader, and makes them think about the subject. It was beautifully written, with the word choice and rhyme elevating it in eloquence and impact. You wrote a really amazing poem, and there is nothing to say other than well done.
This was a great story, it engages the reader and was well written. There were a few grammatical errors, but nothing too noticeable or distracting. For the most part, it had a nice flow, but the ending, with him on the skateboard was a little choppy and hard to follow. You might have been trying to follow the rule about a new line every time there is dialog, but that only applies when the speaker is changing. That one part didn't affect readability too much, but just be aware and try not to be choppy. Other than that it was a great little story.
Although it was short, it was a great poem, and it had a very nice flow. The rhyme scheme was constant and noticeable and sort of engages the reader. The only thing I would have to say is that the third line is a little choppy because you cut off so abruptly from the second line. You probably wanted to make it rhyme, but you shouldn't sacrifice flow and readability for the sake of rhyming. But other than that, it was a great little poem.
Thank you for sharing this beautiful story. It is very interesting and thought provoking, and a great read. The plot and timeline was well written and transitioned well, and the details you added were great. There were a few grammatical errors, but nothing to really distract the reader from the story. Just remember to capitalize the first word of each new sentence. Other than that, it was a lovely story, and overall very well written.
Thank you for sharing this lovely poem. It is very sweet and draws emotion from the reader, making them invested in the speaker. The slight rhyme scheme added to the soft flow nicely. It is a simple structure that is easy to follow and has a quiet and delicate elegance that is sometimes hard to achieve Overall, it is a delightful read that pulls on the heartstrings a bit.
Thank you for sharing this amazing poem. I really liked the way you highlighted the basically forgotten efforts of all those who couldn't fight, and instead kept the supplies coming. It is an emotional piece that helps you remember that soldiers weren't the only ones sacrificing something. This is a great tribute to all those who were behind the scenes, who never got credit. It is thought provoking and makes you realize that the war wasn't solely in the front lines, it was everywhere. Your delivery and flow really rounds out the poem, and overall it was a joy to read.
Thank you for sharing this lovely poem. It definitely tugged my heartstrings and made me think about my own mother. It is such a sweet, simple poem, and its nice flow adds to the emotional impact the poem creates. There is a quiet passion that is present throughout the entire poem, and you delivery was excellent. It was overall an amazing poem.
Hello Jacky, thank you for posting this short story, I really enjoyed it. It was a great read with an interesting twist that I definitely wasn't expecting. You did a good job of building up the "suspense" of sorts with the reveal that Jeb was from out of this world, and the added comedy aspect at the end with the car floating, and Sam's disappointment was enjoyable. The only thing that was a little unclear for me was the second paragraph, especially the "rejection sticker" part. That part was sort of hazy when I read it, but I got the overall gist. Maybe if you explained what you meant in a little more detail, your meaning would be clearer right off the bat. But overall it was a great story.
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