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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/artmajor
Review Requests: OFF
29 Public Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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1
Review by Alonzo Skelton
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
I saw quality phrasing, effective pace, and writing experience in "A Walk through the Woods." Reading it offered to me a moment of pleasure. I look forward to seeing more of your work.
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Review of Star-Dragon  
Review by Alonzo Skelton
Rated: E | (4.5)
I liked this; particularly your spare use of words. I didn't detect a wasted syllable throughout Star-Dragon. Good job.
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Review of From The Pigs  
Review by Alonzo Skelton
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
My favorite stories are those with a sound plot, believable characters, and above all, a philosophical twist. I enjoyed reading this. Keep writing.
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Review of Do What You Like.  
Review by Alonzo Skelton
Rated: E | (4.0)
I enjoyed reading "Do What You Like." You do a great job of keeping the reader engaged. I read far too many stories in which writers spend too much time setting up the plot and/or characters. Your post allowed both to progress naturally. Only one negative comment: you misspelled "derision."
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Review of Shannon's Gift  
Review by Alonzo Skelton
Rated: E | (4.5)
Great story: good pacing, character development, use of dialogue, and tension. I had only one momentary pause at a phrase that distracted: "...broke my heat into a million pieces." That sounded to my ear as somewhat jarring. I thought "...broke my heart." would have been more terse and therefore more effective. This is not so much a broad criticism as it is a comment on the effect on me of the flow and rhythm of words. Good work.
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Review by Alonzo Skelton
Rated: E | (4.0)
Good writing, though I disagree somewhat with your premise. I think television and culture reflect each other. While tv encourages antisocial behavior, it shows us only who we are and what we want to see. We glorify the angry gun-toting cowboy-swaggering individualist because we--as a culture--see ourselves that way. We cannot change television until we change ourselves.
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Review of A Shadow of Guilt  
Review by Alonzo Skelton
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
I see something of Nathaniel Hawthorne here. Good writing.
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Review of Over & Down  
Review by Alonzo Skelton
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
"Over and Down" made for a fun read, but I have a minor comment: I felt it move too quickly. I wanted to savor the characters and the situations, but I was moved to Roy before I "got" Severus, and then onto the doctor before before I got to know Roy. May I suggest that you exploit more fully each character and change of location as a "scene"? I felt that I was watching the action rather than "being there." Please don't take my comments as a negative review... I enjoyed the story. I understand that your work on "Over and Down" might be an early draft, and my comment, therefore, petty. I look forward to the entire story.
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Review of Pancho and Me  
Review by Alonzo Skelton
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Great story, good reading.
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Review by Alonzo Skelton
Rated: E | (4.0)
"The Artist" blew me away, too. But then, I am a film buff, and I enjoy old B&Ws and silent movies. The pop culture crowd cannot know what it is missing in its blind pursuit of shiny things that deny the value of its own cultural history. Sad.
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Review of Rebellion  
Review by Alonzo Skelton
Rated: E | (4.5)
Great. It's worth a 5.0, but I stumbled over "completely" in line 8. That's only because I have a grudge against adverbs, and not due to fault in the poem.
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Review of The Sound  
Review by Alonzo Skelton
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Too funny. Sounds like some of my days. I'm glad I do not suffer alone.
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Review by Alonzo Skelton
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
After reading "They Led the Way," I had to keep reading. Please keep posting. I am a fan.
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Review of They Led The Way  
Review by Alonzo Skelton
Rated: E | (5.0)
Loved it. I, too, am a fan and a student of the Beat writers, and your poem caught something of their message. Thanks for offering it.
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Review by Alonzo Skelton
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
I'm a sucker for free-form train-of-thought prose poetry. Few writers do it well. I enjoyed reading this. Thanks for offering it.
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Review of The Holiday House  
Review by Alonzo Skelton
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Great story. My only criticism lies in a couple of misspellings spotted in reading, but I couldn't find them when I scanned back trough the piece. I recall "weak" for week, but I got lost in the story and forgot the other. Great writing.
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Review by Alonzo Skelton
Rated: E | (4.0)
This is great! As a history buff with an emphasis on military history, I found this fascinating. I learned things I had not known.
The only thing I can say about style is that there is a scattering of passive phrases in the piece, but none so noticable as to detract from the work. Please keep writing. I'd like to see more.
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Review by Alonzo Skelton
Rated: E | (4.5)
Well thought out and well written. I would have broken it down into separate essays, but the length is not a detriment. After all, I read it to the end.
I am a native-born American with no experience beyond our borders, but through reading, I have acquired an infatuation with Indian culture. In my short time on Writing.com I have read several of Dr, Gupta's essays and have found them fair and reasoned.
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