Nice short story. It depicts a good friendship where it is clear the two characters know each other well. You know the friendship has a lot of trust when one friend is able to rant pour out all her worries to the other one and get good advice. The characters in this are relatable and likable. I find myself sympathizing with Doris because I have had to listen to a lot of rants from friends in my life but to be fair I've done my share of ranting to my friends on my end too. There is a very realistic quality to Jennifer. I like that she is not able to recognize that some of the things she points out apply to herself but is able to acknowledge them when her friends points them out to her. It seems really human. Nice writing!
I've been doing a lot of reviews this week so I'm coming across a lot of poetry forms that are new to me. The Rictameter is definitely one of these. The Syllable count for this is cool to try. The format of the poem winds up giving it a nice shape to it with the longest line jutting out through the middle. The poem itself definitely hits an emotion chord with the girl's life being cut short. I think the fifth line of this "robbing her of any sort of future" is the strongest just because the ten syllables used flow smoothly. Nice writing and thank you for introducing me to a new style of poem.
The poem definitely puts the reader in the mindset of the character. It is nice to that the reader gets to follow along on the journey with him. The character undergoes a lot of growth in this from wanting immortality, obtaining it, getting bored with it and wishing that he didn't have it. I guess is always greener on the other side. The strength of this poem is that writer is able to convey the characters thoughts really smoothly as they gradually transition to the exact opposite of what the narrator originally wanted. When you look at the beginning and end of this piece, it is a nice contrast between the two mindsets the character had.
The short story is very well written. It works as a Flash fiction piece but I feel it could easily be expanded to a much larger story. You capture the setting of lab and scientist testing his invention very well. I can feel the tension and pressure of John trying his best to get the invention working in front of the audience. It was a fun ending with reveal of the purpose of the product. I sympathize with John a lot in this. Things really go smoothly when you are presenting them for an audience. ^_^;
The title of the project and story is great choice. I like the biblical reference. Nicely done!
I was wondering what a story titled Ice Cream truck was doing in the Horror category. I had a really ominous feeling when reading this and then sure enough... yikes. This poem flows very smoothly right until the intentionally abrupt cut off and the rhythm works very well. The are some great description in the poem particularly with the heat and the ending scene. I also like the description as the ice cream as "winter for my mouth".
There was one segment of this poem that cause a little bit of confusion as I was reading it through it due to ambiguity...
The sun beats on my tousled hair
As I run out to meet the truck
It turns my neck and ears to flame
For a second my mind went to the truck turning the character's neck and ears to flames. I had to reread the segment to realize the narrator was referring to the sun.
I like the storyline behind this poem. It was a pretty exciting read with a good premise. I feel like the story could be expanded a little bit more. The reader could be given a some more information about the character's relationship with his wife and what makes them special enough that he should get a do over. The ending also feels a little abrupt as it completes after the description of what the do over entails. I don't know if more is planned for this poem but I recommend adding to it.
On the poetry side...There is some great description going on. The description of hell is well written and the reader is able visualize it strongly from what the author writes. Well done!
This poem cover the aspects of parenting very well. You have to acknowledge that being a good parent isn't easy. It takes a lot of hard work. I like ideals it highlights that good parents pass on (i.e. knowing the difference between right and wrong).
The strength of this poem is that it causes the reader to think about the subject matter. I am very close to my family so I really connect with this poem and the respect that parents are due. They do a lot for us. This was a free verse poem so there no exact rhythm to it, however it flowed really well. My favorite segment was the opening stanza with the 3 lines using "and" as a conjunction in the middle. It was nicely written!
I liked this. This was a sweet story. The situation is set up really well and its easy for the reader to follow what is happening and understand what was going on. I felt the tension of the interview sympathized with the lead character who was trying to adopt as she told her story. The segment involving the prospective mother answering how she thought a child should be treated was heartwarming. There are some great subtle to touches in this that were fun to see. I liked the distinction given when interviewer mentioned that "This would take awhile" that she was saying it unkindly. I gives her a more human touch to her rather than just an antagonist role. Also I liked the gentle moment where the husband comforted his wife as she struggled to discuss her background. It was very well written!
This type of poetry form is a new one for me. I'm familiar with couplets as a rhyming scheme but I didn't know there was a term for 6 of them put together. That is really cool. This poem is really nice. There is some great imagery a nice macabre feel to it that fits in with the title. The word choice in this was really good and first two words immediately give the time and setting of the poem. I love the dark imagery used such stripped limbs gallows and Spirited Goblin crows. They were spooky to imagine.
The rhyming couplets allow this poem to flow smoothly so it was easy for the reader to follow along with and enjoy this. Nice Writing!
This was a fun one. It definitely fits well with a Thanksgiving theme. I definitely recommend sharing this in November. I enjoyed reading this. The couplet rhyming pattern worked well and the rhythm was very smooth. The plot of this poem made me smile as the turkey did his best to avoid the typical Thanksgiving outcome but seemed to fail at every turn. I cringed a little bit at the farmer approached the turkey holding the ax and then burst into laughter as the twist was revealed. It was a great ending and a Perfect Poem!
This is Great Poem that showcases that a symbol can represent a lot. The Seventh U.S. Army patch clearly has a lot of meaning behind it. I like the way that each color is given a specific meaning in this and all of them are shown to be important. There is some great visual imagery with raindrops, sunbeams, the mountains and the sky. There are also some powerful ideas that come across as you read this. You get a good sense of what the soldiers who earned this badge needed to go through to obtain it and the the reader walks away with a lot more respect for them.
This is a good poem. It definitely leave the reader with an ominous feeling. The description helped me find a little bit of the context of this. It suggest that an unpleasant experience in the past that continues to haunt the narrator. There is a great dark feel to this. Rhythmically this poem flows really nicely. The are no exact rhymes there are words that sound similar particularly at the end of each stanza (lingers, slithers, whispers). The syllable count for this poem was spot on making it very easy to read though There are also a nice set of refrains in this as well as phrases are repeated. Excellent writing!
Good Poem. I like the flow. It read very smoothly and was set up very well. With the questions being posed to the readers in three of the stanzas...there seemed to be a really good rhythm to them. My favorite segments though were the second and third stanzas of this. I liked how the words circled around i.e. (Fear leads to Fear, hate leads to hate etc). There was also a really great alliteration in Fear fosters anger. It was an interesting choice to cut the the question in the second to last stanza. It almost as if it displays a sense of exasperation on the part of the narrator that he/she couldn't finish their thought. I also like the change from the change from the question in the beginning vs the questions towards the end. In the beginning the questions being ask are about behaviors we could chance and at the end the questions are about behaviors we should aspire to. Well done
Nice Story! It really captured the intensity of a hostage situation. It doesn't seem like a second was wasted as this story immediately starts the reader off in the middle of the middle of the action with one of the hostages injured and lead needing to think on her feet. The description in this story was really good as I could picture all the scenes from the makeshift first add to the negotiation. I love the fast paced finish with the police breaking in to end the situation. It covered all the moment that a person would expect to see in a hostage situation Also creative use of the prompts fitting the selected words into the story.
There is some great descriptive imagery in this poem. From the dark skies changing to brilliant blue as the rain passes. Readers are able to visualize the change as the poem progresses. That is not the only change the poem describes as the spirit and soul seem to adapt and grow with the Rain as well. I like that the author makes the connection that rain is a source of life. That acknowledgment allows readers to grow and change as they read this poem as well and end with a greater appreciation of the rain and some learning on their end too
I could visualize being in an busy airport when reading this. Filled with people of all sorts; Different countries, races, looks and outfits. This poem reflects just how much covid has changed our lives as how people are wearing their masks becomes a distinguishing characteristic for people visiting the airport
I think the strength of this poem is its description and word choice. I was able to picture the people in the poem very well from they were written out There is a gentle rhyme scheme for most of this poem with the 1st and 3rd lines of every stanza rhyming making it fun to read through. I liked reading this!
Neat poem. This is my first time hearing about Tetractys poetry form. I like the little bit of wordplay used with the title. Pretty creative to make a Tetris themed Teractys. If you really wanted to add another level to the title... you should have have made this one four stanzas. As a Tetris fan I think you certainly captured the essence of the game... the fast pace, the goal and the way the pieces are adjusted. The second half of the poem in particular made me feel like I was in the middle of a Tetris game as the stack got higher and the game got faster. Very Well done!!
Wow... this was a powerful poem. I like the way it personifies a Tsunami. You can feel the tension as the each syllable of the name is quietly whispered. There are also some great visual descriptions depicting the devastating power of the narrator. They hit with destructive force much like the type of tidal wave itself. There is also a nice bit of contrast at the end where the Tsunami is described as having its thirst quenched. It was definitely a thought provoking juxtaposition. Very well written!
I liked this poem. There is some great visual imagery. I love the image of the lightning bugs in the first stanza. The same with the Hummingbirds and Bees and breeze dancing with the moonflowers. Some beautiful images to imagine. The second stanza is amazing as well. When I think of blue light and the times described, I picture the time of day to be twilight. I liked the flow of this poem. The rhyme scheme was an interesting mix abab in the first line followed by cccc for the second stanza and dada for the third. It blended nicely.
This poem depicts the aspects of Solitude really well. There are some great contrasting images throughout this. For example the way the last couplet compares silence with the potential of a violent storm or the thrill of night with Angel Light in the fourth couplet. One of the great ideas conveyed in this work is to take pride in solitude. Often solitude is looked as something unpleasant but this poem turns that on its head. In terms of flow... this poem flows really smoothly with a great set of rhymes to read through. I enjoyed going through this very much.
This is a great poem. You really capture the essence of a predator perfectly. You can feel the fierceness of the predators described. It contrasts very well with the viewpoint given of the prey in this poem. The night setting is beautifully described. I am really impressed with how the rhyme scheme was done for this one with an all A setup. This pacing of the poem is face paced as the reader goes through each line very quickly and feels a sense of excitement reading it. It was a lot of fun to go through. Thank you for writing it!
This poem captures the importance of water perfectly and draws attention to the value of the commodity. It is interesting to think how water could be taken for granted as the first part of this poem discusses. The best segment of this poem for me was the third stanza where the reader is given a great description Women and Men, old and Young watching the sky for rain. The mention of the Rajasthan as a desert also provides a powerful visual image. It is structured well with a nice set of rhymes going allowing this poem to flow smoothly. Great Sonnet!
Great Poem. I love the cover image. The animals chosen for this poem are two really beautiful sets of animals. I really like the imagery that you are using depicting these creatures flying against the Azure sky. It is a very interesting comparison listing these two animals together and I like how you connect what they have in common.
I love the last stanza. You have a great description of the two animals wings. The hummingbird's rippling features contrast against the butterfly's tattooed wings nicely. It also ends with a great visual image of the two animals eating side by side happily. Nice writing!
Sweet song. I liked the accompanying story. It definitely captures the feeling of a person looking back and remembering the past. At the same time there is a nice contrast with the lead's youngest granddaughter getting married. The grandmother attending an event where her families future is in many ways just beginning makes the look back all the more poignant. The tone of the story fit the song in the video really nicely.
I'm a former teacher so there's a lot of props to you for being able to come up with 3-4 hour lesson. I've taught two hour classes and found it changing to pace the material evenly enough to fill the time span effective. I can relate to having to adapt the timing of your lessons. It really does take some scrambling to adjust the pace of your lessons. Your entry is written well and it is very nice to read through. Of course my favorite part was the strikethrough of Dorothy. It made smile. Great writing.
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