|Hello fallon pacific,
As a candidate in the Rising Stars Program, I am reviewing your poem, "dandelion".
First, I really like the title of your poem, It evokes fond childhood memories of wishing on a dandelion, blowing on it, and watching the seeds float away in the breeze.
Your poem evokes a sadness of unrequited love, despite wishes on dandelions. I really like how you expressed this sadness.
Technically, the meter throws me on your poem. While every line rhymes, the meter is such that it doesn't flow as well as it could. I always count the syllables on each line and keep each line close to the same number of syllables,so that it reads smoother. Also, "everytime" should be two words, every time. these are simply my suggestions.
My favorite lines are "around my heart, the dandelion seeds spun
and every time we touch i am still undone"
Very good poem. Keep writing!
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