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327 Public Reviews Given
333 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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51
51
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Review of: Naked: First Poetry Reading

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - Nice! (Interesting!)

What I like - I like the way you have layed your world bare to us, and described a sensation I think we have all felt at one point or another. You are right to compare a poetry reading to a public undressing, for at base they are much the same. You have done this beautifully, and very sucessfully!

Meter/Rhythm - Open, to a point

Rhyme - Open

Nuts & Bolts - No issues here!

Ways to improve - No suggestions here!

Keep Writing!!!



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52
52
Review of Awaiting the Fall  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Review of: Awaiting the Fall.

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - I really like this!

What I like - What I like - I love your imagery, and the way you relate the role of the leaf to the greater tree. For some reason, I am drawn to the word "unfurling" in this piece. I think it is very powerful. The same goes for the phrase "Minor minion of a multitude".

Meter/Rhythm - Open

Rhyme - Open

Nuts & Bolts - No issues here!

Ways to improve - No recomendations here!

Keep Writing!!!



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53
53
Review of Strawberry Fields  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Review of: Strawberry Fields

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - I really like this.

What I like - I like the imagery, the way you carry the strawberry theme through the entire poem, and the way you liken your lovers lips to the strawberries as well. I also like the way you describe the way the field is now, and almost morn the loss of such a gift to the march of progress.

Meter/Rhythm - Open

Rhyme - Open

Nuts & Bolts - Scattered punctuation might help, but use it sparingly.

Ways to improve - I'm not sure I would include the last two lines. I think the piece stands well on it's own without them.

Keep Writing!!!



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54
54
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Review of: Misic in the Numbers

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - This is really good.

What I like - I like that this poem teaches, has something to contribute. I like the way you have this all put together, and the connection you make between music and math. (some would say unrelated subjects, but as a scientist, I see all music as math.)

Meter/Rhythm - None

Rhyme - unset.

Nuts & Bolts - No issues here

Ways to improve - What would happen if Collatz were proven untrue?

Keep Writing!!!



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55
55
Review of Up Two Trees  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Review of: Up Two Trees

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - I like this.

What I like - I like the message you have in this piece, and the way you turned it into a modern day nusery rhyme, based on a traditional nursery rhyme.

Meter/Rhythm - Some minor shifts in rhythm, but nothing that detracts from the piece.

Rhyme - (abcb)x4 -

Nuts & Bolts - Fourth line of the second stanza, I think you want "world" as opposed to "word"

Ways to improve - I wouldn't change anything.

Keep Writing!!!



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56
56
Review of Two Mimes  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Review of: Two Mimes

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - WOW!!!

What I like - I like the way this poem is put together, and the message it conveys to the reader. I think it shows how much we look beyond a situation, look at those in our world that we might view as a curiosity becouse they are diffrent from who we are. Itsais a lot as to how our culture views disabilities

Meter/Rhythm - Melodic, but I could not detect a set rhythm

Rhyme - (aabb)x8 -

Nuts & Bolts - No issues here!

Ways to improve - Do not change a thing! Thank you for sharing this!

Keep Writing!!!



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57
57
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Review of: Boots of Bellfonte

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - Wow!! Very Nice!

What I like - I like the story you have put together for this, and the way it develops through the piece.

Meter/Rhythm - It seems that most of your stanzas have a very rhythmic meter, almost melodic. Some stanzas do not quite fit the melody, and although it is noticable, it is not very distracting with this piece

Rhyme - (abcb)x25 - Sometimes the rhyme is passive, and depending on your accent, a possible streach, but for the most part, it works nicely

Nuts & Bolts - No issues here that I could see.

Ways to improve - I would keep this very close to the way it is now

Keep Writing!!!



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58
58
Review of A Faraway Land  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Review of: A Faraway Land

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - Very Nice!

What I like - I like the descriptions you give, and the way you seem to put us "there" in this piece.

Meter/Rhythm - Very soothing and comforting, although not really formulated in a strict pattern

Rhyme - No set rhyming scheme.

Nuts & Bolts - No issues here that I could see.

Ways to improve - I would watch the breaks you make in your lines, erring on the side of more lines than greater line length.

Keep Writing!!!



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59
59
Review of Raindrops  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Review of: Raindrops

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - I like this!

What I like - I like the way you personify the rain, describing it in terms that make the rain come alive.

Meter/Rhythm - Loose, but rhythmic

Rhyme - No rhyme scheme

Nuts & Bolts - No major issues here, but you may wish to go in and add some punctuation.

Ways to improve - You place a lot of emphasis on what happens when the rain hits the ground. You may wish to go in and add a lottle bit more on the process of the raindrop forming and falling, to add a bit of ballence.

Keep Writing!!!



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60
60
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (3.0)
Review of: Beware of the Night

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - I like this.

What I like - I like the narative within this piece. I also like the way you build suspence, and your descriptions.

Meter - For me, this piece created it's own meter, but it did not nessisarily match the line structure.

Rhythm/Rhyme - Again, this piece has a nice rhythm, but it does not nessisarily match the line structure

Nuts & Bolts - Spelling and punctuation were OK, but I had a very hard time locating the caesura.

Ways to improve - While reading, I felt like I was reading a piece of prose, rather than a poem. For me, this detracted from the structure of the piece.

Keep Writing!!!



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61
61
Review of Snow  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Review of: Snow

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - I like this!

What I like - I love its simplicity, and the way it conjures up the imagery of a journey that is difficult and repetitive, yet taken daily out of personal necessity. I also like the fact that you refer to today’s journey as new. It suggests that despite the repetition, the trip is never quite the same twice.

I also like the repitition of the second and third line in each stanza. It wonderfully ties the two together.

Meter - Tight, and well developed

Rhythm/Rhyme - Nice rhythm, loose rhyme. Very effective.

Nuts & Bolts - No issues here

Ways to improve - No sugestions here.

Keep Writing!!!



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62
62
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Review of:

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - I like this very much!

What I like - You have excellent word choice, and your imagery is very vivid. I also like that you turn the tables on death, calling him out as a gift to be cherished as opposed to a sentence to be feared

Meter - Free form - it works well here.

Rhythm/Rhyme - Free form - I think playing with your word choice to try to get this to fit would take away from the power of your words

Nuts & Bolts - No issues here that I could see.

Ways to improve - None that I could see

Keep Writing!!!



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63
63
Review of The Old Poet  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Review of: The Old Poet

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - I love this!

What I like - I like the way you position your speaker, as an aprentice to the subject of the poem. It works very well for your setup!

Meter - No real strict meter - but the way you organized this, it does not need one

Rhythm/Rhyme - (abab)x5 - This is used well here. It firms up an already strong piece.

Nuts & Bolts - None that I could find.

Ways to improve - I'm not sure I could come up with anything here.

Keep Writing!!!



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64
64
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Review of: Sonnet to a Setwork

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - I like this

What I like - I like the way you are, to a certian extent, mocking Shakespear in his own art form. You even, at times, seem to be reverting to olde english structure, which adds to the mock!

Meter -

Rhythm/Rhyme - Very appropriatly, you have the rhyme of this piece set as a Shakespearean Sonnett. The rhythm, however, goes awry in places

Nuts & Bolts - No issues here!

Ways to improve - I would go back over the meter of this piece, and attempt to tweek it into a set rhythm.

Keep Writing!!!



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65
65
Review of Beauty Of Nature  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Review of: Beauty of Nature

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - I love this!!!

What I like - I like the simplisity, and the way you have crafted your stanzas. I like the fact that you ask us to direct our attention away from the things we always recognise and shift our focus to the little, far more important things.

Meter - None. But in this case, that's a good thing.

Rhythm/Rhyme - None, but again, in this case that's a good thing

Nuts & Bolts - No issues here that I could see.

Ways to improve - If anything, you might be able to work with stanzas two and five, to even them out, but other than that, I would leave this the way it is.

Keep Writing!!!



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66
66
Review of Where are you?  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Review of: Where are you?

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - I like this!

What I like - I like the simplicity, and the way you have hidden a love poem within a seemingly random little piece.

Meter - No set meter, but it works well without it.

Rhythm/Rhyme - A minor rhyme sprinkled through, but it works well to help help tie this piece all together.

Nuts & Bolts - No issues here that I could see.

Ways to improve - I think it would help with the overall cohesion of the piece if you were to find a way to introduce the "-ight" rhyme into the fourth stanza. It would create a stronger bridge to the other three stanzas.

Keep Writing!!!



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67
67
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Review of: Doesn't Make Sense

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - I love this! It is very playful!

What I like - I like that you have strung all these common sayings together to form a complete story. It is very inventive, and shows a great deal of creativity!

Meter - None

Rhythm/Rhyme - None

Nuts & Bolts - You might want to go back and put in a few comas and periods, but other than that, no major issues. "Memorie's" should be "Memory's".

Ways to improve - On this piece, I'm not sure you can.

Keep Writing!!!



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68
68
Review of Tideborn  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Review of:

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - I like it!

What I like - This is a very simple poem with a great message! I love the fact that you have written this from a point of view that is rarely seen. (I take it that you meant for us to see this as from the point of view of a sea creature.)

Meter - Free

Rhythm/Rhyme - Free

Nuts & Bolts - No problem that I could see

Ways to improve - Knowing that this is a part of something you cut up, I am curious about the rest of the poem.

Keep Writing!!!



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69
69
Review of Blossoms Maligned  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Review of:

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - Holly Smokes!!!

What I like - The basic storry line, the open ending. You have painted a wonderful picture for us here, and by the time you get to the end, you can actually feel yourself as part of the story.

Characters - Very welll developed for the story. Not too much information, not too little.

Development - Very well developed.

Nuts & Bolts - None that I could find.

Ways to improve - Personally, I would have left out the line about "a Christmas they would never see". It gives away a little too much of the ending. I would have prefered if this foreshadowing had been left out, leaving the ending a bit more up in the air. But, then again, that is just me.

Keep Writing!!!



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70
70
Review of Love Song  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: 18+ | N/A (Review only item.)
Review of: Love Song

Hello! First off, let me just say that this review is my own opinion. We all see things a bit differently, and we all have our likes and dislikes. Please feel free to incorporate this review into your editing, or ignore it. It is your writing, after all!

First Impression - This is nice.

What I like - I like the fact that this is more about real love than new love, and that you have taken this from a little used perspective. I like the transition from first meeting through deep relationship and back to the time when two have again become one. It gives this piece a definite sense of permanence.

Meter - anapestic tetrameter, again given in the evplination. You have kept to it quite well.

Rhythm/Rhyme - Given in the explination - ababbcbc (x3), bcbc

Nuts & Bolts - None that I could see.

Ways to improve - None that I can think of.

Keep Writing!!!



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71
71
Review of Writer's Block  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Review of: Writer's Block

First Impression - WOW!!!

What I like - I love the almost prayerful setup of this piece, the flow from poem making master to the struggle to continue through a road block, than a wish to find sustenance in your raw materials. This is a very well laid out piece, and you have done a fantastic job with it!

Meter - Iambic Tetrameter

Rhythm/Rhyme - ABCBDEFEGG

Nuts & Bolts - Not a thing to worry about here!

Ways to improve - none.

Keep Writing!!!



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72
72
Review of Asylum  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Review of: Asylum

First Impression - I like this!

What I like - I like the topic, the plea for help in getting away from that for which there is no escape. I also like the simplicity of this piece.

Meter - Stanzas one and two match, with minor variations in three and four. Overall, it works really well.

Rhythm/Rhyme - None.

Nuts & Bolts - No issues here.

Ways to improve - As much as I like what you have here, I must say that it is remarkably similar to many poems out there. You have not introduced something new to the discussion, nor described your pain in any way as to make it stand out from the crowd. The way you have put this together speaks of your talent, but I would love to see some creativity to go with that talent.

Keep Writing!!!



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73
73
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (3.0)
Review of: The Night that Surronds

First Impression - A bit of confusion, but I like the fact that you made me think!

What I like - I like the fact that this does not truly fit any mold.

Meter - None

Rhythm/Rhyme - None

Nuts & Bolts - If I were you, I might think about revisiting some of my word choices, especially in the third stanza. Of the four stanzas you have, this is the one that comes closest to being rhythmical, and that rhythm could help pull this together a bit more. Also, the last line of the second stanza does not quite fit. I might consider rethinking the last three words of this line, maybe to bring them in rhythm with the third line.

Ways to improve - If you do not do this already, I would think about reading this out loud to yourself, or maybe having someone read it to you. Hearing it in spoken word might help you to boost the effectiveness of this work.

Keep Writing!!!



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74
Review of Tomorrow?  
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (3.0)
Review of:

First Impression - Wow!

What I like - I like that you didn't try to clutter this with too many details, and that you kept to the basic information needed to understand the story. I also like the way you return at the end to a brief memory of the incident. It ties the whole piece together.

Characters - This is told not quite from the perspective of the main character, but rather from behind the main character. Consequently, we never do "feel" the emotion or the pain of the story.

Development - I would have liked to see a bit more development, as I think this would actually be better if it had been a longer piece, with greater depth of the main characters personal emotions and reactions to the world around them.

Nuts & Bolts - No real punctuation or spelling errors that I could detect.

Ways to improve - I think you should spend a little more time giving your main character depth. It seems that this could be a great piece, but it is held back by the flatness of not being able to see who your lead is. The flatness that makes the background action so good takes away from the power of the main character.

Just remember, this is only my opinion. This piece is still your work.

Keep Writing!!!



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75
75
Rated: E | (4.0)
Review of: My Views on Some Things

I love this piece!! I especially like the way it reveals a lot about you as an individual. This is a very personal piece, not quite a story or an essay, but rather the beginnings of a personal philosophy or manifesto. The fact that you have penned this in the manor you have speaks a lot about where you were when it was written as well.


Keep Writing!!!



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