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1
1
Review of Ancient Ones  
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Angel&Witch


Hello there, Rhoswen - Goal Reacher
This is a
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#1188309 by iKïyå§ama
Review! *Angelic*

*Reading* I saw this poem highlighted in last week's Spiritual Newsletter and was totally drawn-in by the title. It is filled with mystery and begs a reading.

*InLove* I love poetry that brings attention to the ancient spirits of those who walked the earth generations ago. It shows the strength of faith and due respect to be able to feel them around us in our present world. *Shield10*

Poetic Rhythm:

The meter and rhythmic flow were flawless. When they form the way these lines have done to present the reader with a sweet melody, it is perfection. I am not a fan of finding obvious rhyme. Rhyming is not the end all-be all of poetry. I believe there's a deeper beauty to the assonance and consonance threaded within this poem.

Well-woven words were chosen to casts an imagery of nature around us, and how a simple leaf, sound, scent, can bring us closer to the spirit world and those who have long since passed from this earth.


Love, love these ending lines:
"know that you will never be alone;
the Ancient Ones are around you."

*Bird* They bring hope and light because they are all around us, enveloping our very core with their strength.


I felt a deep spiritual connection with your poem. It's beautifully written and will stay with me long after I have left this page. *HeartB*

Until next time--write on!

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*




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2
2
Review of Old Man Winter  
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Angel&Witch


Hello there, Greg. Welcome to WDC! *SuitDiamond*

This is a
GROUP
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Dedicated to promoting positivity, encouragement, and support to the WDC community.
#1188309 by iKïyå§ama
Review! *Angelic*

I am also reviewing your item because it popped up on the random Read & Review. *Smile*

Setting the Scene:

Indeed you have given your reader many visions of the perils of wintertime within your poem. I can associate with some of those nasty winter chills, ice fender benders and unexpected visits to a snowbank at the end of a slippery road. *Laugh*

Your poem is quite convincing, and, it makes me grateful to be a snowbird.*Beach*

Observations:

There are several grammar errors with leaving out the apostrophe in the contractions:

Examples:

"Theres a man thats nasty,"

"He dont care what your age is,"

Also, the rhythym is a little off in some spots. A quick read out loud will catch those areas where there is an imbalance of syllables within the lines.

Further Observation:

"He makes a hearty human, break down when its cold"

I think you meant to say "hardy" as in rugged.

Final Thoughts:


This is a fine poem about Old Man Winter, it's just a little on the rough draft side as is. However, it has good potential with a few adjustments here and there.

Nice job with the descriptions. You painted some powerful imagery for the mind's eye. *CheckO*

Until next time--write on!

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*





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3
3
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Angel&Witch


Hello there, Odessa Molinari smiling
This is a
GROUP
The WDC Angel Army  (ASR)
Dedicated to promoting positivity, encouragement, and support to the WDC community.
#1188309 by iKïyå§ama
Review! *Angelic*

I am also reviewing your item as a judge at "The Bard's Hall Contest Thank you for entering the November contest! *Smile*

This letter home was very touching. The Serviceman prewrote a letter home to his wife just in case he would not make it home. However, his not making it home meant that he was writing a "By the time you read this ..." letter.

*Shock2* The poor wife received the letter meaning he was killed or MIA. How heart breaking the thought of receiving such a letter on the cusp of the holidays. Very sad! *Cry*

Observations:

I caught a few Grammatical errors upon reading the story. They are simple to fine when you reread the story and are not in a holiday rush mode. *Wink*

*Thought* I would have loved to have more story line going along with the character. Perhaps some build-up to the point there is a request for the troops to pre-write a letter home as a final goodbye should it be necessary to mail.


The reader is hungry for more story. It does capture one's attention and tugs at the heartstrings. *HeartBroken*

However, you took the letter home prompt and made it work. The prompt was covered nicely and according to the rules. I loved the ending!!! *Delight*

Good job! *Bell*

Until next time--write on!

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*







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4
4
Review of Space Patrol  
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello there, Paul D
This is a
GROUP
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Webbie's Home for Witchy MBs!
#444444 by Shsssh, It's Just Me!
Review!

I am also reviewing your item as a judge at "The Bard's Hall Contest. Thank you for entering the November contest! *Smile*

This was both heartwarming and heartbreaking at the same time. I could feel Elena's loneliness as the holidays were approaching. The realization that we the readers know that there is little chance she'll be home for the holidays. However, we leave the page with a thread of hope. *Fairy2*

Observations:

*Globe* This is a good, strong story line. You bring your love for Sci-fi into the mix, weaving it well and leaving the reader wanting for more. Yeah, it's the "more" part I would have loved to have seen in the story. I want some development, some backstory about how it all was falling apart in the world and how she was placed where she was placed at this time.

*CheckO* However, you followed the prompt handily, and the reader can fill-in the blanks with a little imaginations.

Well done! *BurstBR*

Until next time--write on!

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*



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5
5
Review of Gobble  
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello there Paul D
This is a
GROUP
The Witch's House  (13+)
Webbie's Home for Witchy MBs!
#444444 by Shsssh, It's Just Me!
Review! *WitchHat*

I am also reviewing your story as a judge at "The Bard's Hall Contest. Thank you for entering the November contest. *Bigsmile*

Prompt Followed?


Yes, you described a Thanksgiving without a turkey. *CheckGr*

Rules Followed?

Yes!!! You placed the key words "Happy Thanksgiving" at the end of the story. *CheckGr*


Observation: ( A minor typo)

"Generations to follow us will thanks us profusely." [thank]


Life in The Colony:


This story takes place on the moon. A speaker addresses the new colony.

It was a humorous, out of this world tale. that encouraged the population to leave behind their old Earthly traditions and begin new ones on the moon. *Moon*

Turkey Replacement:

Introducing "Splurkey." It's the delicious turkey replacement that smells and tastes like turkey, only promised to be much better. *Ha*

Of course, at the end we readers find out what exactly Splurkey, is. *Gag* *Laugh*

Good one, Paul! *Witchlegs1*

Thanks again for entering the contest. *Rocket*

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*



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6
6
Review of River and Swamp  
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Angel&Witch





Hello there Mastiff
This is a
GROUP
The WDC Angel Army  (ASR)
Dedicated to promoting positivity, encouragement, and support to the WDC community.
#1188309 by iKïyå§ama
review. *Angelic*

I am also reviewing your story as a judge at "The Bard's Hall Contest Thank you for entering! *Bigsmile*

*Rain* I loved this Southwest Louisiana method of celebrating Thanksgiving! The "house-chef" and enjoyed preparing different dishes for the feast. The only thing missing was the huge platter filled with poultry. It was slim pickings in the rainy swamp area -- not even a duck to bring down! *Duck*

*TreeCypress* Luck as it may have it brought a change for the better with the son, a shotgun and a dog. *Ha* They would have a meat platter to place on the center of the table and could also invite their neighbors down the street.

Observation:

I noticed that the narration of this story's dialect was perfectly executed. However, when the dialogue between parent and sons began, it quickly turned more colloquial with a heavy accent. The speech and sentence formation changed.

“Cut the best two or t'ree feet off the tail.” (Same narrator telling the story)

The children definitely had the colloquial speech during that exchange. It just hit me that none of that usage was used during the narrating of the story.
Nothing hugely distracting to the fine story, it just made me pause and think about that point.
*Wink*

Rules and Prompt were followed perfectly. *Check*

*Utensils* Alligator? But of course! *Bigsmile* The tail is wonderful. I have had it in Florida -- it tasted like pork spareribs! Moist, and delicious! *Frog*

I really enjoyed this Thanksgiving without a turkey! *No**Chicken*
Thanks again for entering the contest. *Bigsmile*

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*




*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
7
7
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Angel&Witch




Hello there Angelica Weatherby goals on.

This is a
GROUP
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#1188309 by iKïyå§ama
Review. *Angelic*

I am also reviewing your item as a judge at "The Bard's Hall Contest Thank you for entering our Thanksgiving without a turkey, contest! *Bigsmile*

Wow! Sextuplets?!! Now that's a handful-plus of babies to raise.

*Delight*I liked that they all gathered for their Thanksgiving, twentieth birthday. I cringed a little at their mom's choice of names for them, though. *Laugh* Hey, it's original!

You followed the prompt and the rules spot on!
*Check*

Observations:

There were several distracting errors that made the read a bit bumpy.

"Go buy some from the store," Elk said taking off the leg of the turkey to observe how, on the inside, the meat looked uncooked yet,..." Would the woman's child command her to go to the store and buy chicken? Sounds disrespectful. She raised the sextuplets all alone after their father died when they were infants. Why didn't he go to the store himself?


Palo, their father, had died when they were just a tiny infant(s)

Now that they're older some of them became married and ha(s)[d] children.

Elk replies and then gathered everyone into the children, young and old alike. Gathered everyone into the children? (dining room?)

Those errors aside, your story has charm, filled with lovable yet quirky characters and quite a unique use of the contest prompt. *Smile*

Thank you again for entering the contest. *Cool*

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*



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8
8
Review of The Turkey Trots  
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Angel&Witch



Hello there, Odessa Molinari smiling
This is a
GROUP
The WDC Angel Army  (ASR)
Dedicated to promoting positivity, encouragement, and support to the WDC community.
#1188309 by iKïyå§ama
Review *Angelic*

I am also reviewing your item as a judge at "The Bard's Hall Contest. Thank you for entering! *Bigsmile*

Oh, my, this was hilarious! Adults out to pub and the pups go wild. Indeed Thanksgiving turkey has been "eaten by the dog/s!"

I felt a sense of urgency as you kept the reader watch-watching, wondering if the couple would get home on time for the guests arrival. Here in the States, there's no way you can drag the hostess out of her preparations for dinner guests. *Laugh* Well, that is unless she's going to a friend's or relative's house for the feast.


Prompt was followed handily. *Check*

Observations:

"She knew that was were [where] the yummy stuff was kept."


*Down*

Rules:
*Leaf2O* Short Story, 1000 words or fewer. *Check*

*Leaf2R* New entries written this month, for this prompt *Check*

*Leaf2Br* End the story with the words *Right* "Happy Thanksgiving!" *Left*

You forgot to end your story with "Happy Thanksgiving." *Sob*


Parting Thoughts:

Very amusing tale with plenty of visuals for the reader to enjoy!


Thanks again for entering the contest! *Cool*

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
9
9
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Angel&Witch




"* My First Thanksgiving Alone...

Hello there, ruwth
This is a
GROUP
The WDC Angel Army  (ASR)
Dedicated to promoting positivity, encouragement, and support to the WDC community.
#1188309 by iKïyå§ama
Review *Angelic*

I am also reviewing your entry as a judge at "The Bard's Hall Contest Thank you for entering! *Bigsmile*

*Cry* This was such a sad tale. Being only seventeen and a runaway makes for a perilous existence out there on the streets. Thankfully the youth was offered a place to stay in a couple's home.

*Frown* Sadly, the youth was by herself for Thanksgiving. Holidays can be very tough for those who are alone, and do not find the joy of those times within their hearts.

Prompt Followed:


Yes, you did indeed portray a Thanksgiving without a turkey.

Rules Followed:

All the rules were followed including the necessary words at the end of the story, "Happy Thanksgiving."

*HeartBroken* This was a heartbreaking story because not even a police officer questioned this young woman who was alone on the streets and underage.

Suggestion:

*Thought* I think there was room to slow down the pace of the story a little bit. Perhaps give the reason she felt compelled to leave home.

Conclusion:

*HeartB* Touched the heart. It makes a reader see that not all Thanksgivings are warmly met and celebrated with loved ones.

Thanks again for entering the contest. *Smile*

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*






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10
10
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Angel&Witch



Hello there, Jeannie
This is a
GROUP
The WDC Angel Army  (ASR)
Dedicated to promoting positivity, encouragement, and support to the WDC community.
#1188309 by iKïyå§ama
Review *Angelic*

I am also reviewing your item as a judge at the "The Bard's Hall Contest. Thank you for entering! *Bigsmile*


*Laugh* This was such a charming and humorous read, Jeannie! I loved the vision of the giant Birdzilla being dropped off at your house, those many years ago, by a very proud turkey raiser. He was very generous and kindhearted, but had a tendency to overdo the growing-process on a bird. The bigger they are, the tougher they can be. Yes, smaller size does matter when working with an oven with limited space! *Ha*

The scenes of hubby and wife trying to push that huge poultry into the oven is priceless! It's the classic proof that bigger is not always better. It was definitely a visual experience for the reader playing out in the mind's eye.


Observations:

Jim helped my [me] up.


*Down*



Rules:
*Leaf2O* Short Story, 1000 words or fewer. *Check*

*Leaf2R* New entries written this month, for this prompt *Check*

*Leaf2Br* End the story with the words *Right* "Happy Thanksgiving!" *Left*

You forgot to end your story with *Right* "Happy Thanksgiving."
Why, Jeannie, WHY? *Sob*


Parting Thoughts:

Your story is humorous, and an entertaining read, especially so since it's a true story. Sounds like something that would happen at my house. *Rolling*

Good job! *Bigsmile*

Thanks again for entering the contest! *Cool*

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*





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11
11
Review of The Lone Survivor  
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Angel&Witch


Hello there W.D.Wilcox
This is a
GROUP
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Dedicated to promoting positivity, encouragement, and support to the WDC community.
#1188309 by iKïyå§ama
Review! *Angelic*

I am also reviewing your item because it popped-up on the Random Read & Review. I mean it really did pop-up, as I unintentionally hit the button. *Laugh* No matter, I figured what the heck, I always enjoy a good Olympics show.

Characters with odd characters:


Troy Kealy -- The great one. The one representing America in these future Olympics.
Warren Bost -- the previous first choice to represent, but stuck as the back-up
And assorted military officials and robots. Persons or things not to be messed with. *RollEyes*

Location, location, location:

New South Africa -- Cape Town

Superior Strength:
Troy was the lone survivor of a Mars fiasco.

Sprouting body Parts:
Yup, he was a sprouting them up down, left and right and with a 360 view. Well qualified if not over qualified as his very own humanity was at stake. *AlienGr*

Observation:

"The man’s grip could have a cracked a walnut." Doubled up on the "a."

Conclusion:

*Bug* As with all of your stories, whether human, alien or machinery, you pull your reader into the show, front and center. There's sufficient mystery surrounding the character and also, a cringy aspect of dark to horror that infuses the senses.

Good job, Bill! *BareTree3*

Until next time--write on!

Regards,
WW

Image #1310337 over display limit. -?-








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12
12
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hello there, Schnujo Loves WdC!
This is a
GROUP
The Witch's House  (13+)
Webbie's Home for Witchy MBs!
#444444 by Shsssh, It's Just Me!
Review! *Witchlegs1*

I am also reviewing your entry as a judge at "The Bard's Hall Contest. Thank you for entering our annual Cop Shop Mystery! *Magnify*

Memorable Moments:


Got to love the alliteration, here: "Shirley Will-Writon-Wall...Well,"
Shirley surely had a thing about the letter "W." Okay then Shirley, right on or I should say Write on Wall, plenty of space there! *Laugh*

*Sheriff* Loved the "spoiler alert!" Who'd have thought it was Writon she wanted after all? I guess she was tired of the hyphenated "Wall."

The Double-Double cross -- PRICELESS! Parker Baker deserves his just desserts behind bars! *Pthb*


Observation:

"Parker Barker" his name is Parker Baker." *Whistle*


Sensationalism hits at the end!

Oh my stars! Jones makes his feelings known to Smith in an unusual way. Of course if he did enjoy a little popcorn and Moxie along with chess games, the relationship could bloom. However, the inevitable would need to happen -- leaving the nineteenth precinct.

I know, 19 precincts in such a small hamlet. Possibly the other 18 were condemned and the buildings retained their "numbers." *Laugh*

You followed the rules perfectly: solve a mystery in exactly 19 sentences! *Gavel*

Good job! *Wolf*

Until next time -- WRITON! *Ha*



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13
13
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hello there Whatas Enjoying Whoville
This is a
GROUP
The Witch's House  (13+)
Webbie's Home for Witchy MBs!
#444444 by Shsssh, It's Just Me!
Review!

I am also reviewing your item as a judge at "The Bard's Hall Contest. Thank you for entering our annual Cop Shop Mystery! *Magnify*

*Rolling* Adrie, you ran this perp through the grinder at 90mph, with the quick and quirky set-up and solving done.

Entertaining Characters:


I'd say yes! Whata ya think, with Porky 5 Ohs, a food stamp defrauding ex-wife, a Librarian Killer, An officer with wet knickers, a fresh corpse -- and throw in a yellow duckie ... Whata could go wrong? *Ha*

You did the deed, solved a mystery in 19 supersonic sentences. May have a tiny punctuation issue, but it flew by so fast it got away from me. *Shock*

*Cheshire* I could just picture this mild-mannered locksmith grinning while he slipped away with the stash.

This was a wall cracking, side-splitting fun read! *Tophat*

Good job! *Toy*

Until next time--write on!

This is one of my new sigs


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14
14
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Angel&Witch


Hello there, lezismore-with 2020 vision
This is a
GROUP
The WDC Angel Army  (ASR)
Dedicated to promoting positivity, encouragement, and support to the WDC community.
#1188309 by iKïyå§ama
Review!

I am also reviewing your item because I am a judge at "The Bard's Hall Contest. Thank you for entering! *Magnify*

This was really a fun read even with the twisted romantic relationships involving the "Mayor's ex-wife,Crystal, was his late stepmother’s best friend and her daughter, Sasha, was Parker’s brother’s fiancée." Now that's a mouthful of complications involved in a heist. *Laugh*

Observation:

"Parker Barker" Parker Baker *Wink*


Parting thoughts:
You followed the rules :19 sentences only, and mystery solved. *CheckO*

Your story was very Entertaining! *CheckY*


Surprise Ending!


Well it makes me wonder what the good folks of Bardstown are going to do about the time capsule and the 20th decade Founder's celebration! *Shock2* I guess we'll have to tune in next year to see how that all gets solved. *Cool*


Well done!
*CupcakeP*

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15
15
Review of Desdemona  
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Angel&Witch


Hello there Life Is Good !!!
This is a "The WDC Angel Army review!

I am also reviewing your item as a judge at "The Bard's Hall Contest; Thank you for entering the Cop Shop Mystery! *Magnify*

*CheckGr* Your story followed the rules, 19 sentences only, and, it solved the mystery.

*CheckY* I like the uniqueness and the twisted scenes that result in a surprising ending -- not that any mystery being solved in 19 sentences doesn't have it's surprises and clever nuances. But, if the crime fits, the scenario and can be solved with great humor, it's all good and within the spirit of the contest. Love reading what entrants will come up with to solve the mystery!

*Cheshire* Fife? I didn't think Fife had it in him! *Laugh*

Observation:

In rapid order succession, a kidnap call came over the wire to Jones who that old Mrs. Stone was being held for ransom,

A little awkwardly stated. TRY: ...came over the wire to Jones, that old Mrs. Stone was being held for ransom.

Fun read, good job! *PoliceCar*

Until next time--write on!

Image #1503796 over display limit. -?-






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16
16
Review of Fuzzy Fun Pages  
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I love these fun games and am so excited they are here for the birthday month of Pay It Forward! You do so much to uplift spirits when least expected and always pay it forward throughout the site. *HeartV*

Your folders of cNotes, Fuzzy-grams and adorable bears doing good deeds is such a fine fixture in this community, and I know so many here appreciate YOU! *Teddy*

Thank you for all your generosity including opening up these games for a month. The price of premium is costly, but we will certainly enjoy it and make it worth the cost. *HeartP*

*Hug1**hug**Hug2*
WW


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17
17
Review of A Clown's Funeral  
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Angel&Witch


Hello there, Luis Rivera Welcome to WDC!

This is a
GROUP
The WDC Angel Army  (ASR)
Dedicated to promoting positivity, encouragement, and support to the WDC community.
#1188309 by iKïyå§ama
Review! *Angelic*

I am also reviewing your item because I saw it highlighted on today's Newbies Newsletter. *Smile*

*GoLucky* This is quite a humorous show you portrayed with your characters and their dialogues.

A Clown Is Dead!

*Shock* Oh, the humanities! The whole troupe saddened at the thought of their clown, Fischietto being dead. However, the clown had different plans, like planning his own funeral. I believe he actually put FUN in FUNeral! *Laugh*

Observations:

"The group head for a bed where the Dead Clown." [dead clown lay?] it seems a word is dropped here that should be here.

*NoteV* Formatting: I suggest you tighten-up the huge gap between the opening title and the beginning of the dialogue.

Parting Thoughts:

This was a fun and humorous read that pulls-in the reader's curiosity about the dead clown and those around him with big plans. *Ha*

Well done! *BalloonY*

Until next time--write on!

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*








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18
18
Review of Supernatural  
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Angel&Witch


Hello there, Mina~
This is a
GROUP
The WDC Angel Army  (ASR)
Dedicated to promoting positivity, encouragement, and support to the WDC community.
#1188309 by iKïyå§ama
review! *Angelic*

I am also reviewing your item because you posted at the 13 hours of Friday the 13th activity with your post, today. *Witchlegs1*

My initial impressions:


You captured my attention with supernatural poetic flair. The theme played in so well with the spirit of the day.

Flow & Form:

This form is a Loop poem. I enjoyed it very much. It wokred well with this type of subject matter of things that are spooky and go bump in the night!

Your lines were fun to read, smooth and kept along the path of creepiness that this brings across to so many who are superstitious.


Added Fun:

These lines added impact to the poem and just jumped out at me. *Skull*


*Ghost*Thirteen ghosts
*Monster7* Demons with bloodshot eyes
*Dragon* Ruby walks alone
*Moon* Dark shadow fall

Good job!

Thank you so much for sharing this at the "The Witch's Garden on this very superstitious day. Yet, a day I really love!!! *Bigsmile*

Happy Friday the 13th! *WitchHat*

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*






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19
19
Review of Ready to Fall  
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello there, Beholden
I am reviewing your entry as a judge at
 
SURVEY
Rhythms & Writing: Official WDC Contest  (E)
Use the music provided to inspire your writing!
#2002964 by Writing.Com Support

Thank you for entering! *Smile*

My Thoughts:


Interesting take on the music prompt. You painted a picture of aging and life's losses. You make the reader understand this man's loneliness and pain. It's as if we were watching his life pass-by along with him. Good way to pull the readers into the story and keep them reading more of this man's life. *CheckGr*

Location:

His home is the only place that he is, physically. He narrates his thoughts, thoroughly, thus we are taken outside the home and to other places, a neighbor's yard, work, and a bar. We travel through the years with him in his descriptive thoughts without ever having to leave the home.

Characters:

Most of the characters were part of his everyday life from years ago. The readers could picture each one of them interacting with the protagonist.

Doris: His wife who appears to the reader to be sweet, loving and caring.



Observations:

He had seven kids and couldn’t afford to work ever again. I could and a job eventually dragged me away and we forgot each other.

I didn't understand this underlined phrase. I would think with seven kids he couldn't afford not to work. Perhaps I'm missing something?

Parting Thoughts:


I found the ending to be both a little bit of satirical humor from the gentleman, as well as quite poignant. This is where he decides to face his fate, move forward and leave a life filled with ghosts behind. It gave me chills.

Well done! *Quill*

Until next time--write on!

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*


This is an "The WDC Angel Army Review! *Angelic*









*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
20
20
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Hello there, Mara ♣ McBain

I am reviewing your entry as a judge at
 
SURVEY
Rhythms & Writing: Official WDC Contest  (E)
Use the music provided to inspire your writing!
#2002964 by Writing.Com Support

Thank you for entering! *Smile*

*Bird* What a lovely experience one encounters when they are free to let all the shackles of self-doubt break apart and lead to a new beginning. This is what I gleaned from this story. Ivy was reborn!

The Prompt:


*Quill* Nicely penned to give the sense of connection to the music prompt and lyrics.

Character:

Ivy was a determined author trying to get rid of her writer's block and leave all the negative forces behind her. She went through much loss and hurt by those she loved. She was on the edge of giving up but made herself revisit her past and see the good times that they held. She's strong and likeable to the reader.

Setting:

At a lakeside cabin that brought back beautiful childhood memories. Just to note, I loved the refrigerator!!! Through the eyes of Ivy, we are given a tour of the cabin that burnishes images into our minds. It was such a treat picturing the vinyl sofa where many a wet bathing suit rested. Add a loft to the mix -- pure perfection as a backdrop to begin writing again.

Observations.Suggestions?

I found nothing out of place that jumped out at me.

Conclusion:

*Rabbit2* The story is one of facing past wrongs and rising above them. She let it all go and in a dramatic "baptism" when she jumped into the water, she arose reborn within her own mind, body and soul.

Well done! *Butterfly2T*

Until next time--write on!

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*


This is an "The WDC Angel Army Review! *Angelic*







*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
21
21
Review of Uncertain Paths  
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello there, debmiller1

I am reviewing your entry as a judge at
 
SURVEY
Rhythms & Writing: Official WDC Contest  (E)
Use the music provided to inspire your writing!
#2002964 by Writing.Com Support
Thank you for entering! *Smile*

First Impressions:

A young man embarks on an adventure, seeking answers from a shaman. Good way to pull the reader into the story. I was curious and wanted to read more.

Character:


Natock, a Neolithic man, was trying his best to support his mother after his father was killed during a hunt for food. He seemed to do this grudgingly, as he felt the gods were calling to him to be somewhere else.

Natock's mother wanted her sone to start a family of his own. She wanted to remarry. That fact bothered her sone very much.

Setting:

This is the Neolithic age, or last phase of the Stone Age.

Observations:

Natock['s] vision zoomed down to merge with one of the hunters and looked out of the hunter's eyes - his own eyes.

He had gone [on] a three day journey toward the new day.

Natock lowered his spear, accepted the neckless [necklace], and put it on.

Parting Thoughts:


This was an interesting take on the music prompt. I liked how Natock pulled himself together and decided to forge ahead with his life and become his own man. He hoped one day he would have followers. The good thing to remember is that he did indeed have the gods on his side and a protective charm to keep him safe on his adventures.

Well done!*Bird*

Until next time--write on!

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*


This is an "The WDC Angel Army Review. *Angelic*






*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
22
22
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)


Hello PureSciFi - And the Oscar goes

I am reviewing your item as a judge for
 
SURVEY
Rhythms & Writing: Official WDC Contest  (E)
Use the music provided to inspire your writing!
#2002964 by Writing.Com Support
Thank you for entering! *Smile*

This was an interesting take on the music prompt. I actually didn't know what to expect about the strange goings on at the old house. But then, I do like a good haunting.

Imagery:

The children playing tag was such a natural thing. Kids will find a place to play no matter how potentially dangerous it could be. I could picture each one of them in my mind. The dialogue fit the antics of kids at play.

Wow Moments:

The fallen staircase! Oh, my, my heart jumped a bit for the two kids stuck under the rubble.


Observations:


“No, I’m not.” James into a push-up position. You need to add a verb to make this a sentence. [James got into?]

“We were just playing tag there.[new sentence, Capital T, here] there isn’t any other place to play except for that old house ever since the tornado came through here a few years ago.”

Story Flow:


A little bit disjointed, probably due to having to cut out some parts for the word count limit.


*Apple* Also, the family names all starting with an "A" makes the reader pause to try to remember if it's a parent or kid. I know some parents whose names start with the same letter give their children names beginning with the same letter, but when we readers have only a small piece of their lives, their characters, it can be difficult to follow.


The Ending:

*Tempcold* I got chills at the end about the parents, who originally owned the home. I wondered why the daughter and her husband didn't try to keep up the maintenance on such a dangerously inviting place for curious children.

Ending was wrapped up pretty quickly with the visit to the neighbors' home. I guess I just wanted more clarity, more development of the attitude of the townspeople. It has to be tough living in a town where your family is disliked over a piece of troublesome property. I wonder if James' parents are going to sue for his personal injury. *QuestionGr*

Parting Thoughts:

This story has good potential. It just needs a little editing so the flow is better and some parts developed further to bring more clarity to the reader. It's a fine gem in the rough. *CheckG*

Good luck with the contest. *Smile*


Until next time--write on!


Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*


Angel&Witch
This is an "The WDC Angel Army Review!






*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
23
23
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Angel&Witch


Hello there SandraLynn
This is a
GROUP
The WDC Angel Army  (ASR)
Dedicated to promoting positivity, encouragement, and support to the WDC community.
#1188309 by iKïyå§ama
Review! *Angel*

I am also reviewing your item because it popped up on the random Read & Review generator. *Glasses*

You had me at "I miss you Mom!

Once I saw that title I had to read your poem. I knew there would be a connection straight to my heart. You say all the things mothers and daughters would say or think. I could feel the emotions both joyful and some bittersweet moments as well.

Who is Mom?


Mom is the woman who can talk on the phone for hours and never miss a beat. In case that had the tiniest chance of happening, she'd repeat the whole conversation again. *Laugh* But you always knew it was because she loves you so much and wants to hear your voice.

When my mother passed away, I still had her voice on my voicemail. I never erased them because they were beautiful moments of her life that she shared. I can still hear her voice now, both by her messages and still within my mind and heart. So, I know how this poem about your mom pulled at your heartstrings. We do miss them so once they are gone. In fact, I just started emptying the boxes I packed from her home after she passed away. It's been six years that they have been stored away because I would cry if I opened them.


As the years pass, I believe we still remain close to our Moms. We relive those memories in our minds and hearts.

Final Thoughts:

Your poem touched that depth of the love between a mother and daughter. It was beautiful to read!

Until next time--write on!

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*





*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
24
24
Review of Sad Country Song  
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Hello there, Prosperous Snow

This is a
GROUP
The Witch's House  (13+)
Webbie's Home for Witchy MBs!
#444444 by Shsssh, It's Just Me!
Review! *Witchlegs1*

I am also reviewing your item because it popped-up on the random Read & Review.

My Initial Thoughts:

Country music and broken-hearted love go hand in hand. There is a catchy melody and the sweet lamenting that pulls the reader right into the tone of the emotional pain.

Mechanics:

*Music1* Rhythm and Rhyme, beautifully executed.
*Vine1* The feelings it evoked, very "Country!"
*Tackg* The strong words were woven handily for proper impact.
*Guitar* I could picture a guitar strumming along with these lyrics. It could actually be seen, heard and appreciated in my mind's eye. I like that!

*Butterfly2V* I found no spots that jumped out at me and gave me pause. Smooth as silk perfection!

Good job!*CowboyHat*

Until next time--write on!

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*





*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
25
25
Review by Shsssh, It'...
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Angel&Witch


Hello there, Lostwordsmith
This is a
GROUP
The WDC Angel Army  (ASR)
Dedicated to promoting positivity, encouragement, and support to the WDC community.
#1188309 by iKïyå§ama
Review! *Angelic*

I am also reviewing your item because it popped up on the Random Read & Review, generator. *GlassesY*

My Initial Thoughts:

*Laugh* I almost passed this one up! I know have heard and or participated in something pink and fluffy with unicorns contest. I was actually pulled into the contest kicking and screaming, but I digress! I am also not a huge fan of cute and fluffy! *WitchHat*

The Poetic Rhyme and Rhythm:

*BeakerY* I'm mostly a free verse witch, however, I have learned to listen to the tone of poems I am reading and interpret how they made me feel. Your poem was smooth, with melodies of rhyme. But that was not the most important thing to me. Nope, my rating is based on how it made me feel!

Parting Thoughts:

*Ha* You managed to take cute, pink and fluffy and add it to a unicorn, and still I read to the very end. That's just not right! *Laugh* However, I loved the humor of it all. And yes, if you've got to have all that cuteness, you're best off adding humor to break up the sugary after taste. *CupcakeP*

Well done, and deserves the award accompanying it. *Unicorn*

Until next time--write on!

Regards,
WebWitch *Witch*








*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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