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This will show our fight with Fibromyalgia, so others can learn that it's real. |
This blog will chronicle my battle with Fibromyalgia, sometimes comparing it to the battle my wife, Kenzie  has with the same illness. Many don't believe it's an actual illness, though its existence is recognized more and more in the medical community. I'm hoping that by shedding some light on what it can do to a person we can make others aware that it is indeed real, and that it can hit anyone of any age at any time. It's not deadly, by any means, but it can drastically change your life. It can be a real and aggravating pain in more ways than one (pun intended). MANY more ways.
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| ... it hit the fan. Starting shortly after noon, and growing since then. My arms, legs and joints all hurt. Still do. This might be short just because I might have to do what Kenzie has done a few times recently and simply crash early. I feel like I'm out of energy, or close to it. And one of the proven things about Fibromyalgia is that your body drains its own energy in its effort to fight the pain. So I'm not surprised my energy is slipping through the floor and disappearing. LOL (YAWN) I'm out of here to grab a bite to eat, take my Metformin and Nortriptylene and hit the sack. Hopefully tomorrow will be better. |
| Last night, Kenzie and I crashed at the same time. We both ran out of energy about 12:30 this morning. That never happened before. But I wasn't knocking the extra time together. For some reason, it took longer than usual for the pain in my legs to subside last night. And that concern turned out to be justified this morning. My legs have bothered me practically all day. From an hour after I got up, right to this very moment. The longer I was on my feet at one time today, the more they hurt. And to top it off, I started getting the stomach pains that she's had off and on for months. Swell. Kenzie's fared better than me today, though both our stomachs are on edge a bit. She's not hurting overall as much as I am, I don't think. And I hope that's true - she deserves a break. We'll see if either of us gets a break tomorrow. We have a busy schedule. We'll see how much of it we actually have the strength, and lack of pain, to get done. |
| You read it right. My nightly leg pain and muscle tightness is back. It's 11:05 PM, and they've been bugging me for about 2 hours, maybe a little more. I've already taken the Nortriptylene, and when it kicks in I'll be heading to bed so I can take full advantage of the relaxation I get from the medication. Kenzie had a fairly decent day today, just the chronic back pain and a bit of action from her bad knee is I think all she had to fight today. Oops. I almost forgot her bout with IBS this morning. Sheesh. My legs were bugging me a little most of the day, but didn't really get going until about 9:00 PM tonight. I guess we'll see what the weekend brings. Take care, all! I'm off to bed. I can feel the relaxation setting in from the Nortriptylene. See you next time! |
| My apologies for the large gap here, but the past couple weeks have been both hectic at times AND painful. But this past Sunday was one of the worst days I can easily remember in terms of the Fibro. My legs bothering me A LITTLE starting about half way through church that morning. But by dinner time, around 5-6:00 P.M., my legs were feeling tighter than ever, from the ankles to the thighs. Like those blood pressure cuffs were running the full length of my legs and tightening all the way around them. And my back was hurting all the way up, on the left side. Something I'd not felt before. Another new pain. Swell. Last night things were a good bit better, but still far from ideal. And tonight? They're starting to tighten up as I write this, and I have a small headache to boot. Lovely. But at least my back isn't hurting at this point. And that's the part that hits Kenzie first. One of her more consistent ones. On her side, she's been having to nap a bit on a few of the recent days, sometimes in the evening. Today it was mid morning. And she missed church last weekend with a bad sore throat and a really bad backache. And I know it's really bad if she misses church. She doesn't like it when that happens. Missing church is something she hates to see happen, and I fully understand that. We'll see what tomorrow brings for both of us. Hopefully it will be better. But the very core definition of Fibro means we have no way of knowing until tomorrow gets here. |
...pains. Imagine that.  My stepson's girlfriend, Allison,has been fighting strep throat for a few days, and Derek himself has had a sore throat most of that time. Today, Kenzie and I both feel like we're coming down with something. Our sinuses are draining, and I've got the headache that goes with that. She had a short term headache a few hours ago. And we both still have our fibro, which seems to have been accented by the newcomer pain. When I got home from work, my legs, knees, arms, elbows and back were already hurting. Now, at 9:00 P.M., it's easier to get up out of a chair if I push off with my arms as well as my legs. And I've only been up 15 hours. Sheesh. I wanted to make this entry early in case I end up running out of energy early, which fibro is also known to bring about. Example? Kenzie is asleep right now, has been for about 1 1/2 hours. She's been hurting all over, including her throat now too, and her right eye is irriated from her having to get 3 eyelashes out of it. For her right now, sleep is a refuge from the mixture of pain. She'll probably get up within a couple hours and be back in bed around 1:00 AM. We shall see. And the medication problem with the surgery haunts me on this. I can't take the Neproxen, which would also help the headache. I'll have to see if we have any Tylenol left. Kenzie's had to use that for some time, too, so I'm not sure what's left. It's the only thing I can use for pain till I take the Vicotin that will make me drowsy for the night. I may take that soon and crash early. We'll have to see. I can't wait till this surgical incision heals and I can get back to the Neproxen and Nortriptylene. They hit the right spots better for me. Like I said, we'll see. |
| I'm finally back again. Busy week or so. And the fibro didn't help matters. For a couple weeks now, since the surgery on my neck, I haven't been able to take the Neproxen I usually do for the worst pains, or the Nortriptylene I take at night to relax muscles etc. so I'm able to sleep more easily. The Vicotin I can take in the meantime I can only use at night because it makes me too drowsy. And these restrictions have been showing. My legs have bothered me just about every day, and I've even had a stabbing pain in my foot a couple times in the last few days. Kenzie's been feeling things even worse in this time frame. Her back aching almost every day, her stomach not seeming much better, though she's been able to get past that to get some sleep. Then there's her right hip and bad left knee. They haven't quit either. But the toughest part for her has been the fatigue. When our bodies fight all that pain, it costs us energy. Kenzie noticed that when she has a pretty physical day working around here, then gets VERY irritated or upset at something that happens after that, the combination really saps her energy. That's when she asked me if I thought that getting that emotionally upset could drain the energy, and I said, "Sure it can. Because your metabolism is racing, your heartbeat is faster, everything about your body is going high speed, and that is costing energy." That made sense. And she ended up falling asleep about 7:30 that evening and sleeping till almost 11:00, then coming back to bed again about 12:30 AM for the night. And getting a splitting headache on top of everything else didn't help. Finally last night, when she did come back to bed, I went to hug her and after only momentary contact, she said, "Don't touch me". I knew what she meant. She wasn't mad at me or anything, but she WAS mad that her skin was so darn sensitive again that any contact was very painful. She hadn't known it till I touched her, and the element of surprise had startled her. What I had heard was merely her reaction to finding that out "the hard way". And she immediately apologized, realizing the way it MIGHT have been taken, and said calmly, "I didn't mean it that way." I assured her I knew exactly what she meant, and that I understood perfectly. It's hell for both of us when we can't hug, but this is also an excellent example of why Kenzie and I both agree that we're glad we're going through this together. Neither one of us has to worry about whether our spouse truly understands things like not being able to hug. That that hugging problem is not because we're upset but because our partner's skin actually hurts to the touch. Try and explain THAT to a wife or husband who does NOT have Fibro. You'll never figure out a way to do it. Because they have no concept of that kind of pain. So I smiled, got up out of bed, walked around to her side of the bed so she didn't have to turn over to face me, and we shared a wonderful kiss. Then I went back to my side, climbed into bed and we said our "I love you"s and went to sleep. She's feeling it again tonight, and it's only 6 PM but we'll see what happens. My legs are killing me already too. And the weather change doesn't help. Now we're getting a mix of rain and snow, so the cold, damp air is going to play games with our pains as well. I'll let you all know how that affects us tomorrow. |
| Well, turns out the slight blood color inside the otherwise clear waterproof dressing on the back of my neck is about what the doctor expected. He said with as deep as he had to dig to get it all out that this was normal. Just keep the ice on it periodically and see him next week. Cool. He said it was a lot bigger than he thought it would be till he got in there and got a look at it. He said by the time he was done, the hole in neck was deep enough that he could have inserted his whole thumb into it. Look at your adult thumb. That's a good inch and a half or so. That IS a deep hole. Sheesh. OK, that's behind me for a week, and my Fibromyalgia made no bones about reminding me this morning that it's still here. My legs don't (or at least haven't till now) hurt in the mornings. But today they are. Go figure. And this time I just have to put up with it. I can't take my usual Neproxen (prescription strength Aleve) till after the neck is healed on the surgeon's instructions, and I can't take the pain reliever HE gave me because it'll make me sleepy as hell and I have too much I need or want to do today. What a fix. So, my legs are just gonna hurt till they decide to stop it on their own or till it gets late enough that I can afford to take the one the surgeon gave me and hit the sack. So, I remind myself that there are many in this world who are in more difficult situations medically than I am, and I get on with my day. Yes, Kenzie is one of those in that her symptoms are more varied than mine, and more constant. But I'm also aware that I am still catching up with her in terms of the variety and frequency of pains that we feel and the fatigue that comes with them. As I walked back here from the kitchen a bit ago with my bowl of cereal, I found I have another new pain, at least for the moment. With each step I take with my left foot, in addition to the leg already hurting, I feel an added pain up the outside of the lower part of that leg, but only for the duration of taking that step. Once my weight is off that leg, the new pain stops. Like I over-exercised a muscle over there even though I've barely been up for an hour or so. But, such is living with Fibro. |
| Yep, waiting - no matter what it's for - is always the toughest part of anything you do. The surgery went fine, but last night a little blood started showing up inside the waterproof dressing over that area on the back of my neck. Sheesh. I called my boss' office line and told him I'd get it checked out this morning and let him know whazzup. I found out this morning that the surgeon is doing surgeries all morning, and that I should call his office this afternoon and find out what time he can take a look at it. I called my boss and told him, and added that I was thinking about coming in to work in the meantime. My boss said not to worry about it, to just stay home and get it taken care of. Seeing as how I'm not losing anything by doing so, I took him up on the suggestion, and here I am. LOL. Obviously we'll see what happens... |
| Today I had my typical pains. Knees, arms, lower leg tightness. Tomorrow could be another story. I'm scheduled for minor outpatient surgery Wednesday morning at 10:30. To take the remaining signs of a cyst off the back of my neck. It had been drained about 2 months ago, and has been shrinking. Time to remove the last of it. It's being done with a LOCAL anesthetic, an option which I chose. The challenge? Staying perfectly still, laying on my stomach, for 30 minutes while it's removed. Normally during the day I don't have to stay in one position that long. And usually, even if I otherwise could, the Fibro pains won't let me. I'm going to bed as soon as I post this, so I can get about 8 1/2 hours of sleep before tomorrow morning. Remember what I said about the symptoms being stronger when we're tired? I'm getting that sleep to make sure I'm as awake as I can be when they're doing that. And I'm going to take a prescription version of Aleve before I leave the house as well, to help minimize the pain I could end up with in my legs and / or knees from lack of motion during that half hour. Here goes nothing. I'll check in tomorrow sometime and let you know how it went. |
| Kenzie and I had discussed the idea, many times, that cold air was compounding our symptoms. She was already convinced of that, and I'd had my suspicions, with cold, and sometimes damp air seeming to set off pain in my knees that seems similar to arthritis. Today brought the moment that convinced me she's been right all along. I had a meeting to attend at work at 10:30 this morning. But it wasn't in my building, it was in the North Tower of our main complex next door. To help myself get some reasonably consistent exercise, I always walk between the buildings, not taking the shuttle bus provided by the company. Yes, the two buildings involved here are far enough apart that a bus is practical. Walking TO the meeting didn't create any problems. But adding the return trip half an hour later took something in my system over the edge. I got back to my desk about 15 minutes before lunch hour began at 11:30. I think that second cold walk, then sitting stationary as I ate lunch combined to set off the Fibromyalgia. By the time I returned to my desk, not only did my legs hurt (they had been off and on this morning already), but now my shoulders and back were hurting with a wide variety of movements. My back eventually calmed down, but my arms only calmed down a little, and are even hurting a bit as I type this. Hopefully my relaxer will kick in shortly and I can get a sound sleep. THAT part of things has been working quite well for me and I made a point of making sure my doctor knows how well it works. I'm off to bed. We'll see if things stick to the pattern and let me sleep. G'night, all. |
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